love how "ghosting" is this thread's line in the sand for being a bad person or acting wrongly in a relationship. Chill the **** out.

I don't think she knew I wanted kids before the conversation. But I had heard her say she wanted to get her tubes tied about 2 weeks before this conversation. I was kind of stunned when I heard it and then she said the same thing a week later. I just kind of assumed that having more children would be in the mix by default.

I'm sure the following has happened a lot in 2017:

The other night I met a girl for the first time at a bar, and it's one of those "time just flew by while talking" dates. As we're getting the check it was already clear that I was coming home with her (she said she had to take her dog out for a quick walk, but that I should meet her dog, lol).

She says "Yea time just flew by - geez what didn't we talk about? Oh, politics? You're not happy with what's going on now, right?" I laugh because my first thought is, well, given that I'm coming home with you, almost every horn-dog in my spot is going to say the answer that they know you want to hear, regardless of their true views of the world.

She could have followed that with "...not happy with how the liberal media is mistreating our great President who we need to respect and root for!"

I met a cute girl at a bar a week or so ago and Trump got brought up and she thought he was doing a great job. She couldn’t really define what he was doing or how it was a great job. When I asked her where she gets her news, I believe she said “I just make it up”, which supports her Trump allegiance as he does the same thing. Anyway, I pretty much left after that. It’s like murdering an adorable baby in front of me. Absolutely disgusting.

Phatpots: Don't ever tell a chick you are seeing other people. By openly saying that in such a casual manner you made her feel like she means nothing to you/ is not special to you.

I think it's dishonest and asking for trouble not letting someone know you are seeing other people.

I have always thought they should assume you are seeing other people (or at least are open to the possibility of doing so) unless you talk about that specifically. I have never assumed anyone was being exclusive with me without hearing it from her.

Sorry I probably didn't word it the best. I more meant it would be dishonest to mislead someone into thinking you were exclusive if you weren't. Which is cheating and most people would agree is morally wrong and not really the topic at hand lol.

Phat,

So the conversation was she asked you what you thought, you answered, then the conversation ended and you each went home?

It would seem incredibly awkward for the conversation to have not been a bit more, idk, conversational, given its nature. Did you ask her what she felt about you? Or anything similar? Or like legit monologue followed by awkward silence followed by going separate ways?

Phatpots,

If you guys were sleeping together, as it sounds like you were, then yeah, what you said probably hurt her.

I think one more text won't do any harm. If she doesn't answer, then you know for sure where she stands.

I have been in a "I faded you? You faded me!" situation before. So you might want to eliminate that possibility.

Is there like an "online dating 101 for total noobz" post or link? I want to start online dating but have zero experience. Things like how to make a good profile, what to do or not to do when messaging/setting up a date/etc.

If you're an attractive guy all you have to do is run some pictures by female friends to see what they like, then throw those up on there. If it's a short-text format with limited description, just pick a few things about yourself and make them kinda funny.

Otherwise, many of the lengthier-type sites will give you a direction for most of the data-entry portion. Just get into it, you'll learn as you go.

If you’re a not so attractive guy, it’s even more important to have a female friend help you choose/take pics to post on your profile.

Both links below are taken from r/okcupid, but they're both generally good advice blurbs that are also applicable for Tinder+Bumble:

Here is a great writeup on how to take attractive pictures.

A list of DOs and DON'Ts for messages.

Thanks guys. Pretty sure I'm unattractive, but I do have female friends to help me.

+1 on that subreddit being a good resource.

If you have a thick enough skin, when you have a cupid profile up (if you use that platform), have it critiqued.

I was a reg in there for quite a while. Had three critiques done. Since I was known, I was savaged. Every time was legit helpful though.

I would advise going through and reading threads also.

I couldn't imagine putting up a profile in a forum to be critiqued lol. Kudos to the people brave enough to do it. Well maybe in a forum like this where I know people well enough it wouldn't be AS bad lol. I think I would have had to had a bad run though with guys responding or whatever. I would probably get a few male friends to critique it. That would be brutal enough but there would be enough laughs had to make it worthwhile.

***** please. As I said in your H&F log, your body is sexy as ****. Send me pictures of your face and the ones that you are planning to put in your profile and I'll critique them.

It's great you are working through your emotions and stuff, but DO NOT bring that stuff up with girls your talk to while trying to date. An overly emotional guy who comes off as having a bookshelf of self help books is a huge turn off. Sexual attraction is first, so leave all that stuff at the door and try to appeal to the women sexually.

You need to be Confident and Funny. I think you will get a lot of swipes and a lot of girls that want your dick from your pics, don't **** it up by not being confident and being all self loathing.

She loves you long time dude...don’t blow it.

i think it says a lot about people how those who Like Trump basically accept others no matter how they voted and would never consider something so petty as a disqualifying factor, and how men who support Trump have a very difficult time finding a good woman considering how much further to the left most single women are, (the huge gender gap) and how much of those who claim theyre "tolerant" of others and their beliefs/differences and are really the most intolerant of all. its not only dating, people have even been unfriended for supporting Trump and opposing the liberal line on just about any issue.

OOT is not your political platform.

true that there seems to be a lot of rabidly left wing single women in online dating though

Definitely agree that I've seen much polarization involved.

I generally swipe left on anyone who has a strong opinion expressed in their pro-file

Thanks. I have a therapist, a good female friend, and the 2+2 forums to unload my emotional ****, so I won't need to do that on a date.

I definitely have low self esteem though. I don't understand why anyone would find me attractive.