Steve, I'm 5'7" and have had long-term relationships with attractive girls. The most successful (with girls) close friend of mine is 5'7" and his number is well into the triple digits. He's just a natural at flirting/talking with girls ("game", if you will). While he is in good shape and good looking, he's not insanely so. I have another friend who's 5'4", super skinny, and otherwise fairly average in looks but he married an awesome, attractive girl. He's just a great conversationalist and is one of the smartest people I personally know (and I know a fair number of really smart people).

So yeah, being short is a handicap, but it's certainly not insurmountable by any means. Just need to demonstrate your value in other ways, and be confident. Right now it sounds like you have no confidence. I'm no lady-slayer but I've found that the times I've been most successful are when I said "**** it" and went for it. I'm trying to be more consistent about that now rather than have it be a sporadic thing.

If historically your success has been limited, it's not realistic to come out with the goal of dating a hot girl. That's like somebody who is 26 and has been unemployed for their entire lives saying "I want a job that pays 6 figs."

Right now your goal should be: "I want to date a girl who likes me and doesn't repulse me in terms of attractiveness." Don't worry about how hot the girl is until you clear that hurdle- just find somebody OK enough who you click with personally.

I have a friend the same height as you who is currently dating an attractive girl so remember it's just a disadvantage, not a deformity. Don't let insecurity over this consume you, just accept it and play the hand you have imo. Wear platform shoes if that helps.

Steve,

I agree with El D, but do you find asians attractive? They seem to be the one race that doesn't care at all about height in their partners.

yes, I like asians. Nick says Im superficial but girls I know complain guys are superficial but wont date a guy like me strictly for height. it doesnt make sense that they contradict themselves. if they just were attracted to personality they would give me a shot.

why do they care about height?

also @ elD

you say that I need to fix my income, etc. Im getting into online dating. My income is OK and I'll list it accurately. but for dating online how can I get over the 5'5 thing if a girl is clicking on my profile? she wont know how I am socially and I fear she'll click by my page for a taller guy once she sees im 5'5.

thanks,

steve

Biology - bigger taller stronger guys are generally better providers/protectors. This is also a reason why money/power is attractive.
You can't. You can make your profile the best it can be with good pictures and interesting content, but yeah some girls are going to skip you. Just send out more messages. Some girls will be okay with it and those are the girls you want to date anyway.

Everyone is superficial no matter what they say.

It will probably be better for you to meet girls through friends and social circles rather than at clubs/bars/online dating where they might not give you a chance at all based on height. Get in good shape, have a good personality, and attract people over longer period of time rather than wishing you could be the suave 6'2 model that picks up girls at clubs.

It's good to figure out your strengths and weaknesses and then tackling the problem from there (getting hot girls in this case) rather than wishing certain methods would just work for you.

I think once you're ~5'7 then most asian girls don't really consider the height as a extreme negative if you're good in other areas. But under that height, I think it's a big disadvantage. Of course, being taller is always better though.

the provider/protector thing doesnt make any sense to me. protector? from what? how often do fights break out? what am I protecting?

provider? what if I make 90k a year and a tall guy makes 65k a year. arent I a better provider?

how will people even know how much you make if you arent famous?

-steve

It's not logical. It makes no sense.

But height/protection is engrained in subconscious/biology. Deal with it. I'm 5'7". I love it. Harness the shortness. Go lift some weights and get some confidence bro.

C'mon man, if you listen to JRE then you know better than this.

Nobody wants a partner that mopes about their deficiencies, whether real or imagined. Is it really that difficult to understand why women might be attracted more to physically powerful men?

If I can smell the insecurity on you, then women will smell it from miles away. They don't have time to glad-hand someone and build them up when there are plenty of other candidates that aren't as finicky and have their **** together.

im 5'7 as well...on okc i search for chicks <= 5'5 since they are more likely to respond and i prefer them over taller girls anyway. i've always noticed that success seems to come in spurts where i will go 0 responses out of 15, but then get 5 in a row (sample size blah blah)

you can still meet chicks being 5'7, dont use that as a crutch...

complaining that girls don't like short guys is stupid as complaining that dudes don't like fat chicks. don't get mad at biology.

It's biological. Why do men like women with curves and breasts and big eyes? You're fighting something that can't be fought.

Steve,

Both duke and bears are correct.

Wrt online dating, you are going to need to send out a lot more messages and you will only get replies with girls who don't care about height. They are out there, but def in the minority. I think you'll be better off focusing on girls who have unique interests/personalities in their profiles that match you incredibly well. Wrt money, I think it's generally best not to explicitly refer to salaries/income/etc with people, but rather signal your money by your interests/activities/actions.

I also agree with bearz that you will prob have a far easier time of it if you focus on building out a bigger social circle IRL and developing relationships through that. It's just the same as a big fat funny guy. He is gonna be instantly passed over by most girls based on pictures, but IRL he has a shot at winning them over with his jolly personality, especially if he is like the life of the party.

Rogan/Steve/whateveryournameis, if you are on match, you can search for women of a certain height and then check to see which heights they prefer in men. There are surprisingly a lot more women out there <5'5" who have 5'5" listed as the height of a guy they would go out with.

The first thing I do after searching women for my criteria is look at what height they want in a man and if it's like 2 or more inches above my height, I don't bother to message them.

yeah but guys dont care about height of girls. id date girls 4 feet, 5 feet or 6 feet. maybe not over 6 feet but i wouldnt immediately click off their profile like I bet girls would do if I signed up on these sites.

girls care about my height and would care if Im fat. so its not really fair to me, is it? I only want girls that arent fat.

i guess I sound bitter. I am, because Im being judged on something I cant control and im watching guys that dont offer much getting girls Im interested in because they were born a much better genetic hand and they dont think anything of it. they think they are doing something awesome.

i know a guy who is tall and getting hot girls and he's a total DB. if he was 5'5 he would get nowhere yet I have to hear about him banging hot girls.

Rogan,

You can keep bitching and worrying about things you can't control, but it certainly won't help achieve your goal, and will prob hurt. All you can do is focus on improving the things you can control.

I'm 5'7" and obv have had the same thoughts of how much easier this **** would be if I were a few inches taller. But so what? There are a million things that would make it easier, and a million things that would make it harder. The guy who is a midget/paralyzed/ugly/acneface/micropenis/ginger/armless/etc is looking at you and thinking how much easier even a 5'5" normal dude like you has it with chicks.

The hottest guy I ever dated was 5'7". It was really easy to overlook his height. A mutual friend of ours told me later that he usually gets any girl he wants.

Why do you care about hotness?

If you were attracted to a girl's personality, would you give her a shot even if she was ugly?

Uh, is being a redhead really that bad?

no, but it seems like girls hotness can be easily fixed by makeup, clothing and getting into shape since they dont have to worry about height.

myself? somebody told me to "lift weights, bro". well thats not going to help me shoot up a half a foot or a foot. it will still lead girls to not being attracted to me because im 5'5.

im sorry I cant shake that.

if guys dont take height into an account for hotness why cant girls not take it into account so we are on an equal playing field?

that way

male versus female

height=height
weight=weight
personality=personality

instead of height being so important for women. I just want a fair chance.

It's not your height, it's your attitude. Girls have way more to worry about with their physical appearance.

Life is not fair. If it were, we'd all be 6'2" BG-approved models. Deal with what you have and stop be a whinny bitch.

Women do the have the makeup advantage.