Online dating thread - Page 1003 - Other Topics Forum - Discuss Pop Culture, Arts and Entertainment

Yeah sounds like you are either running bad or the language you're using when asking them out.

Can you post an example of a message you would usually send when asking them out?

It's probably runbad, the next 2 people I started messaging with I went for a bit more in depth text back and forth and waited until the 4th message and they both commented they were wondering when I would finally ask to meet. go figure

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02-05-2014 , 08:54 PM

#25052

Hoagie

name is based on sandwich

Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 6,471

I've been on ~8-10 dates with a girl over the last month. Obv valentines day is coming up. I like her, she likes me.

It sounds stupid, but what is the next step? I've had one relationship in my life and it lasted 11 years. So I'm clueless.

I'm in no hurry to give it exclusive status, but I'm not averse to it. Just wait til she pushes the issue? Or speed up the inevitable?

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02-05-2014 , 08:54 PM

#25053

swag_check

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Jul 2012 Posts: 4,425

Messaged a girl like 3 weeks ago, she viewed profile twice but no response. Yesterday she views profile again and "likes" it. Not sure whether best approach is to jokingly reference it in any way or cold message her again. I wish I saved my messages because I have absolutely no clue what I wrote her the first time.

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02-05-2014 , 09:10 PM

#25054

splashpot

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 8,203

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hoagie

I've been on ~8-10 dates with a girl over the last month. Obv valentines day is coming up. I like her, she likes me.

I'm in the same boat except it's only been 4-5 dates for us. Not sure what to do, not because of any obligation, there clearly isn't any, but I like her and want to spend time with her.

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02-05-2014 , 09:16 PM

#25055

Nchabazam

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 4,938

Quote:

Originally Posted by swag_check

Match?

She probably doesn't have a subscription. They can see profiles and wink/like but not send email.

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02-05-2014 , 10:10 PM

#25056

Showtimez

banned

Join Date: Nov 2013 Posts: 1,131

Guys how do I increase my matches in Okc? The only girls I get as matches are 5s and 6s .... Just keep answering questions and let the algorithm do its thing?

Haven't spent much time on Okc but this nice looking girl opened on me yesterday, we spoke on the phone and we are meeting tomorrow. She seems kinda needy though, called me like 3x just today (haven't answered the last 2 calls) and it's giving me all the signs of some psycho biatch.

She has a nice ass though if her pictures are real.

Should make for a fun TR.

Apart from that building a nice stable at POF.

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02-05-2014 , 10:41 PM

#25057

CCuster_911

You Only Live Once

Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 24,435

Am I the only person who never talks on the phone with girls from online unless its like im running late or something, or whatever needs to be said right before we meet(aka I am outside xxx, etc.). WTF do you guys talk about? But more...WHY?

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02-05-2014 , 10:43 PM

#25058

NLSoldier

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 24,252

i think your line is standard. lol @ having hour long phone convos with a chick you've never met.

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02-05-2014 , 10:47 PM

#25059

bobboufl11

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 14,329

Kinda like a short call for screening purposes before date #1 if you're on the fence about a girl and she's a long drive away.

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02-05-2014 , 11:00 PM

#25060

movieman2g

Script*****

Join Date: Nov 2005 Posts: 16,938

Quote:

Originally Posted by CCuster_911

I'm with you, I prefer to just go out and meet someone. If she stinks, leave after a drink. Phone calls are for someone I've been out with 3+ times

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02-05-2014 , 11:03 PM

#25061

sup hezbollah

banned

Join Date: Sep 2012 Posts: 1,559

Lol at speaking with women at all. Just meet up with them and when they begin to speak just grunt and motion for them to immediately begin getting naked.

Words come later.

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02-05-2014 , 11:14 PM

#25062

AnonymousTextField

old hand

Join Date: Mar 2013 Posts: 1,569

Quote:

Originally Posted by CCuster_911

It's builds familiarity and rapport. It also helps to determine if your personalities are going to mesh before wasting the time (and money) going out. Every time I've spoken with a woman on the phone before meeting up with them they've turned out to be a good time on the date. I've easily escalated to at least a make out session with every woman I had first spoken with on the horn. That's why.

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02-05-2014 , 11:15 PM

#25063

kail0r

old hand

Join Date: Jul 2007 Posts: 1,756

So I texted a tinder girl saying let's get drinks next week. She didn't respond so a few hours later I sent her a smiley face. About an hour after I get a response saying

" Sorry im at work haha
Im close by to chapel?
Im letting you know now I wont be putting out tuesday if we do lol"

What's my play and what does this really mean?

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02-05-2014 , 11:21 PM

#25064

mullen

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 17,632

Don't double text girls when they don't answer.

I assume chapel is an area, she is agreeing to meet up with you. Pick a place for drinks by that area and a time. Perhaps throw in a joke about you not putting out on first dates either.

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02-05-2014 , 11:33 PM

#25065

LT22

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 12,842

Quote:

Originally Posted by mullen

Yup flip the script and joke about how you're not easy.

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02-05-2014 , 11:34 PM

#25066

kail0r

old hand

Join Date: Jul 2007 Posts: 1,756

location is perfect because i was gonna take her to chapel st anyway. theres a cool bar that does trivia every tuesday and its been fun in the past. ideas for jokes?

potential response: How about we meet tuesday 7pm sharp on chapel? I've got a fun idea (i wont tell her to pique interest). you will have to do your best to resist my charm though.

thoughts?

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02-05-2014 , 11:35 PM

#25067

LT22

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 12,842

Just had an hour first date (1 drink). Overweight and boring is a bad combo. She insta asked via text if I wanted to go out again, sigh.

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02-05-2014 , 11:36 PM

#25068

yeotaJMU

Shines ELIte's Shoes

Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 22,414

Too try hard imo.

Blah blah let's do trivia at location... Bring your A game and [inside joke] knowledge

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02-05-2014 , 11:37 PM

#25069

movieman2g

Script*****

Join Date: Nov 2005 Posts: 16,938

Quote:

Originally Posted by mullen

+1 to both parts of this post. the double text is gonna hurt you more than it helps

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02-05-2014 , 11:41 PM

#25070

kail0r

old hand

Join Date: Jul 2007 Posts: 1,756

my only issue with saying trivia is the stigma is that its 'lame' and for old people when in fact its fun and can win drinks..

response #2

Hey lets go to xyz bar on Tuesday they have a trivia night there at 7 and its really fun. hands off though, i'm not as easy as you think.

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02-05-2014 , 11:51 PM

#25071

yeotaJMU

Shines ELIte's Shoes

Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 22,414

There is no stigma with trivia Wtf? You're still trying too hard with that 2nd part

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02-06-2014 , 12:00 AM

#25072

mullen

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 17,632

Trivia isn't just for olds, and there is definitely no stigma.

Just go w/ a place to meet at and a time. Your text game seems really bad so just keep it super basic to avoid shooting yourself in the foot.

Fwiw, you shouldn't be sweating this kind of stuff at all - she already agreed to meet with you. Just relax and pick a spot and stop overthinking what should be a simple response.

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02-06-2014 , 12:03 AM

#25073

kail0r

old hand

Join Date: Jul 2007 Posts: 1,756

Yup. Not great at texting. I'll just shoot straight and say Lets meet xyz

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02-06-2014 , 12:34 AM

#25074

bobboufl11

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 14,329

Set up 2nd date with L. We're going to cheap collegy place with pool and games tommorrow.

She agreed to my first two date suggestions but then realized she had plans. Then she proposed next week and moved it up to tomorrow. Hopefully this means she realized how long it would be until she got the D and couldn't hold out until then.

BTW cheap collegy place with pool and games is supposed to be poppin tomorrow night. They have like 4 contests and Ladies Night($1 wine). The last date I took a girl to Ladies Night...

Spoiler:

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02-06-2014 , 01:04 AM

#25075

d10

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 7,513

Quote:

Originally Posted by splashpot

I'm in the same boat except it's only been 4-5 dates for us. Not sure what to do, not because of any obligation, there clearly isn't any, but I like her and want to spend time with her.

Same situation. I was hoping to be further along by now since we started dating early last month but her schedule is pretty busy with work + school. I think we've already established we'll be going out but I don't know how serious I should be treating it.

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