My car is getting worked on so I needed to take the bus to pick it up. As I approach the bus stop 3 women are sitting there. I ask the first woman, very young Spanish looking chick if she knows what the fare is. She just shrugs, obviously super foreign (we got a lot of them over the summer in my neighborhood). The 2nd woman, an old Mexican lady, tells me it's $1.25. The third chick is a hot young blonde woman - a solid OOT 8.5 I think. Natural blonde, perfect pale skin, big eyes. She's wearing a tight shirt and pants so you can see has a very tight body, with a good chunk of cleavage showing. Very cute but not devastatingly beautiful, which is why I don't think OOT would give her a 9.

We hang out at the bus stop for 10 minutes w/o incident. I am behind the bus shelter that blond is inside so there's no eye contact or anything. When the bus comes, I get on the bus behind the blonde. She asks for a transfer ticket in some accent I can't place. The bus driver asks her what she's asking for three or four times and is visibly annoyed. A ****ing transfer, what the hell else is she going to be asking you for, bitch? I hate it when Americans are mean to foreigners for no reason.

Once inside the crowded bus the blond chick takes a seat along the side in the front. I sit next to the old Mexican woman two rows back. The hot blond starts looking around and makes direct eye contact with me. Ok I guess I should smile. I smile, she smiles back.

Oh ****. Now what do I do? There is a seat open next to her. Do I immediately get up and go over there, start chatting her up? I know I have 3 seconds to move or she gets annoyed. Crap too late. So of course I do nothing.

A couple minutes later we exchange smiles again. Seat is occupied by now. I'm basically kicking myself for being such a pussy. I'm just really not used to having a hot chick do this. I have lost about 35 lbs. But still have 25 to go and am nothing to write home about. I hadn't even showered. Although my hair is short now so you can't tell too much.

So a couple stops later the blonde gets up to get off. Should I follow her even though it's not my stop? As she exits I get no eye contact or anything and she scoots off. Probably disgusted with me for being such a pussy. I stay on the bus as the doors close. Sigh.

The whole way to the dealership and back with my car I'm kicking myself, hating myself, imagining the emo post I'm going to write in OOT, complete with MS Paint about the seat situation and ask if I should have gone for it. Then on the drive back I see her walking down PCH.

So I loop around and park my car about 2 blocks in front of her path, but around the corner so she doesn't see me, then just casually "accidentally" bump into her. Oh hey, you're the girl from the bus. Blah blah. She's Lithuanian, here studying/on holiday. She agrees to get some coffee with me at the Starbucks a block away. Yes that Starbucks of bimbos fame. A magical place.

Anyway standard talk about travel, life in Lithuania, weirdness about America/LA etc. About halfway through it comes out that she's 19. Ohhhkaaay. So we kept talking for about 30 minutes. But obviously that was a little weird and we both knew it.

I had her pegged at like 23, but had thought to myself that she could be anywhere from 19 to 28. Chicks like that with great skin that have never gotten much sun, it's very hard to tell. I had sex with a 53-year-old woman from Seattle who looked 40.

I'm 40, I can pull off 35, but not much younger. I know wtf am I thinking even with a 23-year old? But I was really just doing this whole thing as an exercise to get some confidence in myself. And I mean she did smile at me twice out of the blue.

So yeah. We chatted for about an hour, then exchanged numbers. Wtf, should I try to contact her again? Odds she just wants citizenship - 95%+? The crazy thing is she really really wants to see San Francisco. And I am driving up there next Tues. for a little vacation anyways*. Yikes. 99% sure that's not going to happen. But fun to think about.

*(Obviously no American 19-year-old would ever go on a road trip with some strange older man. But Euro chicks, especially former eastern bloc girls, don't really have that kind of fear - at least from my limited experience. They seem to trust their instincts and ability to get out of a bad situation more. Or something.)


cliff notes: suzzer chats up 19-year old

what do you have to lose?

Some people think you can tell your fortune by opening The Illiad to a random page and reading the first line. Suzzer's posts can be enjoyed in much the same manner.

His kidneys, most likely.

And for the love of god, take a camera.

Well I can guarantee my female friends will all give me heaps of scorn. Also I've helped raise a girl who's almost 17 now. That's probably spooking me more than anything. I seriously doubt I could get past that.

Lol I'm so ****ing stupid. When I got her number all I had to do was say can I get your pic to put with the number. Seriously I never even remember I have a ****ing camera phone. I thought about this about 2 minutes after we parted. Didn't think chasing her down on the street for a pic would be such a good idea.

Just **** her already and don't tell aladare or her kid or whoever.

Obv go for it, but I'm super paranoid so I'd take a gun or a taser, or at least some pepper spray.

i think the unicorn needs to make a return

It's not as much about telling them. It's about sitting there looking at someone who's a lot closer in her life to where the kid is at, than where I am at. It made me uncomfortable. 23 I could rationalize. But 19 was just too weird. I have a feeling I could get over it if I was horny. But I'm not sure if can make the moves to get there. Or how I would feel afterward.

Then again I'm sure I've had a few 19-year old strippers boobies in my face at some point. You only have to be 18 to strip right?

This. Call her and tell her you're going to SF if she wants to tag along.

Woody Allen was able to **** his stepdaughter, man up.

gawd eastern euros are so hot. they love it in the pooper too. at least thats what the movies tell me.

It's not like you're hoodwinking her- she's the one who was making googly eyes at you- right?

Yeah which is why I think she wants a marriage visa or something.

Also, suzzer, she was already liking you when YOU WERE ON A BUS IN LOS ANGELES. When it becomes apparent that you have more than $3.78 in your bank account and aren't on parole she's going to jump your **** imo.

seriously?? just do it. you'll sleep fine at night.







but then again that might just be from all the crazy hot 19 year old commie sex you've just had. it can wear you out and is def physically taxing especially if you're slightly overweight. you still very well may hate yourself the next morning. ahhhh choices, the spice of life.

hahahaha this

LFS why no reply to my pm?

She heard me asking what the bus fare was, so obviously not a habitual rider.

If you do not pursue this, it will tack on to that long list of regrets audited in your golden years. Man up and do it!!! Worst case scenario: You involve yourself in a sham wedding, or AIDS, some of those eastern euros are dirty man. Have you seen the woodman chronicles, those chicks sleep with anything. So wrap it up.


LADY MACBETH
We fail!
But screw your courage to the sticking-place,
And we'll not fail.

I do like the getting off at the stop move if you can pull it. One of my most balsy and successful moves was in DC several years ago. I was a congressional intern and just was getting the total eye from cute chick on elevator on the way out one day. She definitely was an intern as well and meant she would most likely be going back to GWU on the metro. I don't take the metro home, but knew I could hop on and run errands that I needed to over the weekend anyway, so I do it, start up a conversation about work, etc. Everything went very well, but I normally am not that spontaneously balsy. Additionally, this may be one of the few place (DC Intern) where I could do this an not come off as a total creep.

Edit: Just realized this is a total brag post with no real point. Suzzer, you definitely should hop off next time assuming you have some way to approach without being a creep.

you're not getting any younger. in 5 years you will definitely be too old to do this... so why not? because if not now, then never, right? and you're not asking because you don't want to go for it. focus on the differences between this chick and your personal life, not the similarities. hot 19 year old lithuanian is the phrase you're looking for imo.

maybe she's just in to older dudes, nothing out of the ordinary there. may as well
give her a call and see what happens.

I liked the part where you were at a busstop with three foreigners - a super foreign spaniard, a fare-knowing old mexican, and a tight blonde with a cleavage chunk, and you chose to sit next to the mamacita.