FACT: Fingernail cleanliness is the most overlooked facet of human hygeine.

QUESTION: If Dids both takes the day off for his birthday and comes in on his birthday, is anyone there when he does or does not arrive?

* People who carry on a conversation with someone across a full elevator

Happened this morning in the elevator in the parking garage. It was only like 4 floors (stopping at every one though), two people were having a conversation in an elevator of about 10 people and they were about as far away from eachother as can be. STFU and talk in a minute when we get out of the elevator please!

I admit I do this from time to time. When I need to go up 3 floors and enter the elevator, I kinda zone out for a couple seconds, so periodically when the doors open and I take a step out, I realize it's the wrong floor and back it up.

Srsly, wtf is up with this? Happens all the time and it puts me on tilt.

Elevator stories are always good. Sociology of Elevators could be taught in college. To be fair, I sometimes ride the elevator up to my 2nd floor office because I've got bad heels/ankles/achilles tendon. I'm 6'0" 182 and so when I do this I always feel bad/uncomfortable knowing the others are like "F YOU U EFFIN IN-SHAPE JURK TAKE TEH STAREZ!" Also, my feet only bother me when going up stairs, and not when walking so it looks like I can walk perfectly fine to them. Oh well, eff em.

lol.

I take the day AFTER my b-day off.

I want to add something dumb my supervisor said to the office not once, but twice within the last week.

He felt the need to tell us this hilarious story at lunch at the top of his lungs about one of his church events where he was barbecue-ing and drinking beer beforehand. Some dude walked up and asked what they were doing there and he said he was with So-and-so Presbyterian church, and the guy got a shocked look on his face due to the alcohol and my supervisor told him "We're Presbyterian, we're not BAPTISTS! HAHAHAAA"

He told us this over a week ago for a good-bye lunch for a co-worker. Nobody laughed. Then two days ago we went out to eat to welcome the new guy and he felt the need to repeat the story at the top of his lungs, while again, nobody laughed.

Also, the new guy is in a wheelchair, and he asked him if he could drive us all to lunch taht day (because he's a weirdo who makes it a point to ride a bicycle to work). I thought that was pretty classless to make the new guy drive to his own celebratory lunch. I would have offered but my car wasn't running well this week.

I hate these people. My office is on the tenth floor and some of our elevators are broken right now so it usually takes ~5 minutes for the elevator to get there. Then a bunch of fatasses get on and press the "second floor" button, filling up the entire elevator with their fatness so that people who actually need the elevator have to wait 5 more minutes for it to get there again. Sometimes I just walk up the stairs to the second floor and get on when the fatasses get off.

It got so bad that they had to put a sign next to the elevators asking people to please not use them for the second and third floors, and thankfully a lot of the fatasses take the stairs now, but not all of them. There's a lot of things I'd like to tell them but you never know who actually has a disability that's not noticeable and I'd feel like a [censored] for being rude to them.

I'm glad this was cleared up, because I originally thought you came in even though you took the day off just so everyone would wish you a happy birthday but you didn't have to actually do any work, and that's just f'n weird.

fascinating related clip

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWXPJoUdX2Q

I posted this in BBV4L, but realized it's also a nice addition to this thread:

Guy needs to buy a stamp, asks around. Girl has stamp. He only has 50 cents, she doesn't have change. He gives her the 50.

Comes back later with 29 cents, gives it to her and requests the return of his 50 cents because that "closer" to the price of a stamp.

Wow, what an anal-retentive freak. I hope she stink-palmed him.

phb,

He tends to not wash his hands after using the restroom, so he's kinda self stink palmed.

Nice math skills. Does he work in accounting?

I don't have any really annoying people near me. I guess that means I must be it.

I am surprised people can get so upset over such small things. Humans are quirky by nature, get over it.

Fascinating take...

There's a difference between "upset" and "I find this irritating". You may want to review the point of this thread.

Quite common in Canada to use "John Henry" when asking for a signature.

Of all the irritatings things posted, this is truly the worst. Imagine the how selfish and inconsiderate someone must be to actually come to work with a lazy eye. That's just uncalled for.

From the Glopper today:

He is describing how a mosquito bit him like 5 times last night in bed and why:

"....and because I sleep on my tummy..." is why he got bit on his neck and back so much.

on...his...tummy.




This person is in his mid-forties for christ's sake.





Also, he felt the need to fumigate his bedroom at 4:00 a.m. to rid it of said mosquito. Like gas-bomb fumigate...


"tummy..."

ROFL!

I have a guy in my office who not only loudly talks to himself, he actually announces his next move: "It's apple time!", "it's water time!"

I said I would quit when he started announcing anything more personal...today, we get "it's pee time!"

I really wish I was making this up...

-ZEN

My beef for today:

Girl in the office's b-day. We all bring in stuff for a breakfast buffett/potluck thing.

One guy is currently walking to Noah's to get bagels. (Noah's specifically because the douchebag bought some [censored] Sara Lee bagged non-fresh crap the last time we did this)

The douchebag was supposed to bring in fruit, forgot (as is standard) and instead of walking to a closer store to get some, has tossed 3 nasty ass bananas up on our worktable.

Zen,

I [censored] hate these people with a red hot passion.

I think what bothers me most is the fact that, if no one was there he wouldn't be saying this crap. The fact that he has an audience makes his douchebag mind feel like he should be announcing his movements and reasons behind them, like people give a [censored].


My father-in-law does a variation of this , feeling the need to explain/justify the most mundane of activities.

Mumbling [censored] like:

"Just gonna get a spoon to..."

"Have to go downstairs to..."

"Just need to go get a..."

and mumbling it to no one in particular.

He just feels like it has to be explained, yet not directly TO anyone, just because people are within earshot.

What did you bring? I bet it was good.