If it's a hypothetical it's a lot better if it's just to the death and you give the kids some kind of weapon. I'm not sure what the weapon should be. Not as good as a good knife but probably better than brass knuckles.

Not bad. I'd like to think if I could pull off one of their heads like the finishing move from mortal combat (like skull and whole spine), I could wield the spine/skull thing like a mace. But I don't know how well developed their little spines are.

Nah, they won't be rigid enough so you need something that has some weight behind it. If you do that, you're just doing it for the fear factor and, if you're going to do that you may as well go the whole hog. Rip one of their faces off and wear it like a mask. It'll be too small, but it shouldn't detract from the effect.

I wonder if you'd get any sort of nutrients from drinking their blood? Seems like one of the main issues here is staying hydrated. I feel like draining a few of them probably serves that dual purpose.

Had a dream about this last night (again). Broke my personal in-dream record and got to about 30 before I got tired. Felt like Lebron vs the Woyaz.

I teach 5 year olds. A healthy adult would have no trouble taking out a full class of 5 year olds.

If you are able to eliminate the fear factor, I'd say 30.
Divide them into two groups, tell them you are playing a new game, "Let's kick Uncle Bill in the head," and told them whichever team gets the most kicks wins cake and ice cream, if they get you down, you have a problem.

Note how hard it is to shake them off when they cling. Now imagine they're biting down.

If I'm coaching the 5 yos, it's all about biting. You randalls are getting ate up.

Its only hard because you're not allowed to punch them.

I feel like I could mow down 50+ pretty easily.

Your boss lets you on the internet in the sex dungeon? Or is that the other bighurt?

Umm, you might be referring to me.

Jesus christ man. Seek help.

how many five year olds? zero if his mother is sat on my head and he's wielding a bottle of pert

Their jaws aren't strong enough. Plus, they're in the process of loosing their baby teeth. Not a day goes by where at least one of them shows me the teeth they no longer have.

Best bet would be to kill/disable enough so that the others would need to climb over the top of the pile.

If you kill one of them, they'll lose the will to fight.

looooooooool

lol at thinking a 5 year olds bite isnt gonna be painful

That pic was in a magazine when I was a freshman in high school. I cut it out and kept it in my backpack.

Related:

http://digg.com/video/3-olympic-fencers-vs-50-amateurs

Good time for a bump due to the bones mention on TCH Live.

https://youtu.be/CygwKcHyS3w?t=15583