hahaha this thread is awesome. 2+2 should make a sub-forum titled "Ass Wiping Strategy"

this thread is mind-blowing.

Lol nice bump one of my favorite threads ever, I want to read the whole thread again. I wish the BOSOX would hurry up and lose so I can attempt.

lol, epic

"LOL @" you bumping this ****ing stupid thread.

I think GEorge Carlin, may he rest in peace, said it best when he said, " you when I wash mt hands after taking a crap? when i get crap on them!"

if not poorly said, then its poorly quoted.

Anyone who doesn't wash their hands after taking a dump should smell the fingers of their wiping hand next time after the wipe. Then you'll start washing, you sickos.

so if you smell and smell nothing its ok?

lol .... uuuh .... sure!

I am far from a germaphobe, and I often don't wash my hands before I eat something, but those people who go out of their way not to wash their hands are just weird. It's like they are taking a stand nobody really knows or cares about.

Oh this thread makes me feel bad...

Went to the toilet about an hour ago, sat down throughout dump/wipe, wiped back to front, hand between legs, looked at each piece, didn't wash hands as they looked clean.
Made food about 30 minutes later.

Not dead yet after 20 years of this...

This was one thread away from being on page two BUMP

But you wiped like a woman.

Wilpro has a mangina, wilpro has a mangina

why are british people so dirty?

Idiot from the Britian doesn't wash hands because he can't "see" any fecal matter on them.

Conclusion : All British people are dirty.

Good one.

I used to wipe toward my balls until someone told me not to.

really? since '03? still thought this was a good idea?

What? It's a true story. Nobody really tells you how to wipe your ass. Not after the age of 3 anyway.

the bumping, not the wiping.

Is there an OOT rule against reviving old 5 star threads?

If there is I was honestly not aware of it and I apologize.

Sorry to bump this but I coudn't refrain from posting in this interesting topic.

I do sit during the ****ting/whiping process. It just seems the proper/easy thing to do.
If you are standing you are decreasing your whiping range. Just lean slightly forward, tilt if needed and go in from the back, whiping from balls to ass. It is REALLY important for women to whipe from front to back as you don't want the **** to hit the fanny.

Also not looking is wrong in so many levels... Sometimes I get it all in one whipe, sometimes I need 12+. I just went to take a dump and tried to get it all with just "knowing/feeling" when I was done. Took me 3 more whipes. Also, if you are a folder you take out the paper anyway to fold it so you can just as well take a look on your progress. Also, please fold 'em. You save a lot of paper.
Sometimes folding pre is also a good plan (when you are having loose ****)

Also on the sitting for peeing... I do this 90% of the time. I like to pee standing when im outside or when there is a urinoir (sp?). But if I can sit down, I will since I am lazy. Also it is proven to be a +EV move for your blatter.

Yeah I also pee sitting down at home or at the houses of friends I respect. Enough of this "aim better" bull****... there's gonna be splash damage no matter how well you aim. Plus it's more comfortable and you can read if you want. Sure, only a few lines, but sometimes it can be refreshing.

and for some reason, I'm laughing out loud at wiping being spelled "whiping" throughout the last post.

So all blind people need to rub their ******* until it hurts before stopping? Sounds legit IMO.

Thank you sir,

Caused me to physically break down into a fit of laughter and tears in my office. Had to explain the previous 172 posts prior to my colleagues, nobody seemed to find it as comical as myself! Brilliant.