Well I'm sure they have a whole crapload of first dates to choose from, and their priority list of things they look for on the date probably looks like:

1) attractiveness
2) attractiveness
3) attractiveness
4) attractiveness
....
4,520) whether it actually looks like a good match.

Those eharmony commercials are funny. They show a couple from a distance and they look normal and semi-attractive (not fat not bald, etc.) then up close you see the woman's smile is super gummy and the guy has like a lazy eye or a giant nose or something. Every one of those people has something "wrong" with how they look. No offense to anyone who uses eharmony I'm not the best looking guy either but I think that's funny. They try to get the best looking most normal couples to attest and they simply just look like losers. Like that guy with the black hair who talks with his head down - no confidence at all and he's like "you go to a bar meet a girl she's met a hundred guys there's just no way to meet anyone..." blah blah. And he's the guy they're trying to present as the hip guy

Ok this one tilts the hell out of me



- Company desperately trying to make it seem like they are socially conscience
- Racially diverse hipsters solving Africa's problems over their computers in their spare time
- Apparently you can't get clean water in Kenya, but you can get high speed internet access so you can live stream your meeting in ****ing HD
- Look how happy the little black girl is now that the hipsters have saved her. What would she do without them??
- I'm sure the people in Kenya thank this company for implying that their country is a ****-hole that can't figure out water treatment

Oh god that's bad. WHITE BLEEDING-HEART AMERICANS SAVE THE WORLD AGAIN.

I'm a white American btw.

Joseph Kony has no chance against that type of coordinated attack.

Haha, look at the hot chick educating the guy on what kind of beer he should drink. Oh, and he's even wearing a skirt. Man, she's probably got bigger balls than he does! RAGE.

Cringeworthy. Both are piss beers. It's like a 3'3" tall midget making fun of the 3'2" tall midget for being short. The execution of that commercial isn't too terrible but the thought process behind it obviously is. Somebody in a conference room was like "hey, we want to project an image of manning up. You gotta man up to drink our special piss beer. Yeah." Then a person who makes more money per year heard that and was like "I agree, let's do it."

This woman said her blind date on Match was real. But she told them ahead of time that she was an actress. It wouldn't surprise me if they flew these 2 in just for the date.

http://shine.yahoo.com/love-sex/conf...v-2503390.html

It's like the 80's again, painful attempts at "rapping" to appeal to the kids.

If you try this let me know. I want to throw Skittles at your neckhole and upload that **** to The Hoppa.

Edit: We can do it on a cheat day, obv.

I think the hoppa ads are funny, but I always find foreigners funny.

the internet explorer commercial where they play dubstep over pictures of frogs and rocketships and smiling babies and ****

**** internet explorer

This is in my head hardcore right now. slow motion.

oh and

I always kind of respect that marketing approach. The illusion it creates feels just real enough to rope in the consumers who couldn't otherwise be sold on the promise that dating sites are overflowing with eligible, attainable model-slash-actresses.

I imagine the casting calls are rather entertaining. Fairly attractive, not young but doesn't look "old" female. Preferably brunette, with at least one, but no more than two of the following:

-Lazy eye (not immediately noticeable, but visible up-close)
-Crow's feet *OR* laugh lines
-Crooked tooth
-ONE dermatological blemish (e. g. mole, beauty mark, etc.)
-Large (but not too large) nose
-Small breasts
-Five (maximum!!!) lbs. overweight

I know, man. I can't believe the conversations on a first date could be awkward.

They will loan you money "based on trusting you."

I swear I want to falcon punch this chick.

That's the whole point - everyone knows most first dates are awkward and weird, so if they're really trying to sell the effectiveness of match.com, you would think the marketing department would be able to find at least a couple of dates where it's obviously going really well.

Like, 'oh, I can pay money to match.com and have dates just as awkward as I can find myself? Where do I sign up???'

I feel very uncomfortable watching the "Bohemian Rhapsody" commercial for the Cosmopolitan hotel.

Yeah the first time I saw that like 5 seconds in I thought "oh that's clever" then by the end of it I was like "god, that was kinda terrible" and now it's just pathetic.

"NO! WE WULL NAWT LET YOU GOWE!"

But the "VERY VERY FRIGHTENING ME!" guy is the worst and needs to be knocked the **** OUT

FYP to highlight what the actual sales pitch is. I doubt it's aimed at people who believe they can find dates on their own. Make those dates non-awkward and nobody would buy it.

The Chivas Regal commercial where the guys are sitting around reminiscing about riding rollercoasters and waking on the beach in tuxedos while that annoying song plays puts me on monkey stilts.

While I appreciate the overall cause, the music is sending me over the edge.

massive tilt

Wilson Staff. Seriously.