OK, I normally don't take phone calls when I'm in the middle of something or talking to people or at a bar or restaurant or whatever unless there's a specific call I need to take (like giving someone directions or whatever). I just let these calls go to voicemail, check them at the first convenient time, and return them as appropriate. Simple enough. Here's the question, though. When my phone rings and I don't want to take the call at that time, I have two options.

I can push the volume button and the ringer will stop but the phone will keep ringing for the person calling the normal 5 or 6 times until going into voicemail.

Or I can push the end/ignore button and the ringer will stop and the call will go straight into voicemail.

The first way takes longer for the person calling, but they do not know whether or not I ignored their call or if I just didn't have my phone on me. The second way saves the caller time, but apparently lots of people know that they were actively shot into voicemail when that happens after two rings or whatever.

So, which is better?

It kind of sucks that your phone does this. My "end" button just silences the ringer, but it continues to ring on the other end. GIven your situation, I'd say just turn the volume down. I think a lot of people would be upset knowing that they were pushed to voice mail, however unreasonable.

I used to think people would get all pissed that I didn't answer their phonecall, but I'm pretty much over that now. If I'm not taking their call, I'm not taking their call. They should be happy I saved them the time and possibly even airtime if the message goes over a minute. So you are doing them a double save of time and money.

I can't imagine one of my friends getting pissed if they call me at a restaurant and I put them straight through to voicemail. It seems like something a not cool, high-maintenance chick would bitch about.

el d,

on my phone i must open it up to hit the end button. i find this to be a hassle. as a result, if i want to stop the ringer i hit the volume button. its external and i dont never have to take it out of my pocket and open it

Wow, thank god some people actually do this. It bothers the hell out of me if I'm supposed to be doing something with someone, and they answer an unimportant call that ends up being an hour long conversation. I voted the second option, because that's what I do. If my friend or whatever asks, I just tell them what happened. I mean, it's not like they specifically know I'm doing that because I was chatting with someone else. I could've been doing a multitude of different things that couldn't be interrupted.

Yeah, this is true. I can't really imagine any of my friends being upset about this either. I ammend my earlier post to reflect this.

I'll just hit the button that makes it stop ringing. I don't know if it stops ringing for the person calling, nor do I care.

I think it's situational. I do this a lot at work with my Send All Calls button, just ships stuff straight to voice mail.


A few types of people


- those who don't realize what's happened if they get sent to voice mail, they can get auto shipped 'cause nobody cares.

- those who know damn well what happened but undertand and won't get pissy, they can get shipped.

- those who do know and will get pissy and those folks you just turn down the ringer.

- people who will get pissy but you don't really care, shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiip it.

Same for me. I usually take it out of my pocket to see who's calling (it shows up on the outside lcd) and if i'm not answering then i hit the button without even opening it.

El D,

I don't see how you could possibly care about what the person on the other end might think for doing this to them. I'd like to think that you associate with better people than that.

Option four, let your kickass Michael Jackson ringtone play on as you moonwalk to the bar.

NT

for 95% of people, hit the volume button and let them off easy; no need to explicitly let someone know you don't want to talk to them

All,

In case it matters to your answer, in addition to my friends, many people calling me are various levels of business contacts.

Hit "end." It shows your current company that they're important enough to warrant uninterrupted conversation. And it saves you from missing another more important call later.

If the caller complains, act stupid and say you had your phone in your pocket, didn't even know they called, and must have accidentally bumped the end button.

If you do it to the same person repeatedly and they catch on, just tell them you can't take calls at work, you were busy, at a movie, or tell them to stop stalking you. Or just go all Californian on them and say, "Sorry. I'm a flake."

That's what I do.

Elaine,

"It shows your current company that they're important enough to warrant uninterrupted conversation. And it saves you from missing another more important call later."

I'm not sure you understood the question. Either of the options does that.

"If the caller complains, act stupid and say you had your phone in your pocket, didn't even know they called, and must have accidentally bumped the end button. "

I'd never do that and think it's weak. If someone says something I just tell them I was in the middle of something and couldn't take the call. No reason to lie here.

then it becomes an EV problem; business phone calls are an excusable nuisance, but if it must be ignored send it to voicemail the long way

All,

I'm not sure all of you are understanding the options here. Whether I hit the volume buttons or the end/ignore buttons, my ringer stops and the call is effectively gone for me. The only difference is to the person on the other end. One option keeps ringing for them until the normal voicemail pickup and the other option immediately sends them to voicemail.

It should be noted that the straight to voicemail option definitely increases the chances that someone will call back shortly rather than leave a voicemail. And if they consider their call really important, they may call back immediately.

"It should be noted that the straight to voicemail option definitely increases the chances that someone will call back shortly rather than leave a voicemail. And if they consider their call really important, they may call back immediately. "

I think that's a big benefit of sending them straight to voicemail. Just this morning I was woken up by a call I didn't recognize. I sent them to voicemail and they called back immediately. I answered the second time because there was such a good chance it was an important call.

You have to make a judgement call when it comes to whether to interrupt whatever you're doing to take the second call, but if I don't take the call, they call back immediately, and I still don't take it, I won't get a third call unless its a real emergency. So in that way its almost like having a conversation with the caller without ever answering your phone or taking more than a couple seconds to send them to voicemail each time.

Caller: "Yo dude."
Me: "I'm busy right now."
Caller: "Its pretty important."
Me: "I really can't be interrupted."
Caller: "I'm dying."

EDIT: I've never had a company cell or anything, so I've rarely had to deal with taking business calls on my cell phone. But if that was a part of my profession it may change things. Obviously tech people on call can't just ignore their [censored], etc.

Hopefully they have more than one friend...

Ring slow, ring fast, whatever you want to do for metagame purposes, doesnt matter... just get the phone quiet... use the volume button...

OK, I'm going to admit to being a volume-button user. It's faster and easier for me since the button is on the side of the phone and is raised; I don't even have to look at the phone. I value this convenience, and the convenience of not having somebody ask why I didn't take their call (whether or not I really care how they feel about it) over the admittedly more honest approach of just ending it then and there.

But, your question was "which is better?". Depends on your definition of "better", but I would think the straight-to-voicemail approach is nicer and more respectful in a lot of ways, and is probably "better" in the grand scheme of things. I am probably not going to adopt it.

Diablo,

For me, volume button is the clearly correct choice for this simple reason: Why show your hand when you don't have to?

And yes, I realize that this rhetorical has poker roots, but I hope that it is used enough outside the poker community to avoid being lame.

If their call really is important, they'll psycho dial you either way. I believe the proper ettiquette is to not say "hey, I see you're calling, but I don't want to talk to you."

For me, it's the F-off button every time. If I don't wanna answer [censored] OFF!

El D,

Ok, so if I have this right - you have your phone with you (not in the car). You obviously want to take some folks calls and not others. I know this. You know I know this. I know you know I know this.

If I am the one calling you, I already know from previous experience that I am on the “do not answer now/ ignore” list. So, I won’t be offended any more than I already have been. Take me on the shortest route and send me to voicemail. (I am probably hanging up and not leaving you a message anyway. I know you saw it was I and ignored me. I'll talk to you when I see you. )

RJT