Grunching a bit, but why was she looking through your history? Did you ask her that? Did she offer an excuse?

Female ITT.

Lying to her is stupid and just escalates the issue.

Many women are not informed when it comes to male sexuality. You now have the opportunity to change this and it's really the best course of action. Find some resources and go over them together.

You have the choice of making this a positive thing for both of you. Instead, you're now living a lie and deceiving her. Grow up. Be an adult. Find a solution that works for both of you.

beating off to non porn is lying?

Pretty sure even you don't believe you're actually going to stay away from porn completely. Didn't you say upthread that you're going to get caught?

Don't you think it would benefit you for your wife to have a more realistic view of men and their sexuality?

Doing anything in secret where you don't want her to find out is lying.

The bit that always bothered me about Little Children was how tame the site Kate Winslet husband was beating off to.

The key here to talking to your wife about this is emphasizing improving the relationship for both of you.

The fact that most of your discussion wasn't about porn tells me you have other things to work on together. You downplay the fact that she says you're not helping out, but reality is that's one of the reasons she's not in the mood.

For women, sex is an 80% mental game, when it's almost completely physical for men. When was the last time you pampered her and made her feel special? When did you last go out of your way to do something she wasn't expecting? A relaxed wife will be a much more receptive wife.

I'm certainly no relationship expert, but how is this only coming up after you've been married?

i love people that have relationships where they dont live together for x years before getting married, live together for a month, then get married.

so basically the theme of this thread is don't get married... some how guys keep falling for it.

Meleader, where'd you pull one month from

Mother'****ing'THIS...You just gave your wife control of your masturbatory habits. How pathetic and worthless can you become? I would bet cash that you also dress how she wants you to dress, I mean why put up the fight, RIGHT?

Obviously because the deal wasn't sealed...now she has her contract and is enforcing it. I believe it is reasonable for her to do so. Conversely, she needs to realize that her husband needs to get laid regularly and accommodate him.

OP, I'd wager that many of the posters giving you pro-porn advice are not married. There is a big difference, and I mean a world of difference (as you are no doubt discovering) between a girlfriend (even a long term one) and a wife. A large balance of power shift occurs when you get married. Men who held all the cards in the relationship before sometimes discover that their compliant kitten has grown post-nuptial fangs provided courtesy of a family court system that will happily relieve you of your possessions and children at her whim. Which is why a man who gets married today without a religious compulsion to do so needs his head examined, but I digress.

Throughout the ages, the social contract in society was that the man provided a roof and sustenance for his wife, and in return she bore him children, cooked his meals, and provided regular access to sex. Since TV didn't exist until about 60 years ago and many people were illiterate, sex was on the nightly menu a lot.

Of course today society is different. Most women, including yours are working outside the home while still trying to run a household, and are just too tired for sex. Fair enough. But that pesky male sex drive is still there.

Someone up thread jokingly listed 1-800-DR-LAURA. I'm not a regular listener of hers, but did hear her answer a question from a woman about this very subject. After finding out the woman only had sex with her husband 2 or 3 times a month, she told her she either needs to screw her husband regularly or accept that he is going to look at porn. I think it's as simple as that.

As someone whose been married over 10 years, I strongly advise against lying to your wife about this. You will get caught again, and it will be a huge mess. Just tell her you require more sex. Be honest about it, and tell her it's OK if she's not 100% into it every time. Why do you think they make KY? Good luck.

for the record, and by the way thanks for the reasonable previous post, i am not going to look at porn. goddamn i feel like tiger woods, i don't even look at porn that much. nonetheless, no porn. i am dropping it cold turkey. but i'm not going to stop fapping. sorry. and if that means doing it to the girls of facebook thread on 2p2, so be it. i don't think that is lying, and i dont think that is unreasonable or deceitful. yes, i'm going to try to be a better husband as well.

Really, did your wife not say anything about you beating off to porn during the near decade you knew her before getting married?

Maybe I'm misinterpreting the 1st message?

OT: jcx's post contains a slew of reasons why you shouldn't get married without a pre-nup. I know I sure as hell won't. Unromantic? Maybe. But on the flip side, it kind of is romantic. Because if you really want to stay with someone forever, you don't want to give them incentives to leave you. (in the form of ez huge child support and alimony if they divorce you).

Of course women will never see it that way, so I may just stick with long term girlfriends.

Honey....every now and then I like to watch a little porn. If you want to watch with me that would be great. If you don't want to join me that is Ok. But Honey.....every now and then I will be watching a little porn.

5 min is not a lot. is it? neglect the first post anyway, i said i'm stopping. lots of nits in this thread

If you don't want to stop, which is obv, the ****ing tell her your not gonna stop.

Nevermind... its pointless.

< Insert Cancel Discount Offer Here >

wtf? i do want to stop watching porn. i said i was going to stop watching porn. the wisdom of this thread convinced me it was a good idea, despite earlier comments.

but am i going to stop beating off entirely? probably not. now that is a crime too?

the 5 min comment was in regard to the nit who was trying to make me look like a liar for saying i will continue to watch porn and then that i won't. i guess he doesn't get that some people actually do take some advice from posts on here, and not watching porn at all is a good idea, and i'm going to try to do it. funny that AFTER i make that commitment, people wanting to "help" get all the more angry. was it better when i was ****ing up and you had someone to bash?

Paging Henry....