Whats your technique for writing an original character? do you map their entire life out? when i took bs classes they told me to fill out this 50 question sheet, but half of the questions don't help me at all.

I am not currently worked with him but recently did on Beavis and Butthead. He's a good friend. I love that guy. How did you know? You a fan of his stand up? He's one of those people who's just hilarious in person even when he's not trying to be. Very nice guy and great to work with.

probably listens to Who Charted?

I usually try to base them on someone I know in real life or a combination of people. That helps make them feel more real I think if not necessarily original. I don't map out their whole life but having some idea of their backstory helps shape them, even if its never directly referenced. Mentally casting specific actors helps too with giving them a consistent voice. 50 questions seems crazy. Usually in comedy just having at least three or four different adjectives to describe them and maybe an example of how they would act in a certain situation is enough. A lot of times characters can start off somewhat blurry and come into focus in the process of writing.

Yeah, I guess I don't have a good grasp of how well known he is to the rest of the world.

thats what i do, ok. I base it 50% on characters I've seen, and 50% on someone I know. I try to make them familiar, but not so familiar that people would immediately jump out and say "WTF, that's Bill Lumbergh to a T."

I hate to ask dumb questions but here we go...

Are the majority of TV writers women?

I can barely stand to watch anything on television lately and I've had a suspicion that that's why. Anyway, looks like a cool thread and I plan to read through now. Thanks for doing it.

Yes. I really enjoy him on this program.

In comedy, male writers outnumber female writers by at least 4-1 I'd say. So, sorry, but females aren't the problem. A lot of them are Jewish. What are you feelings towards Jews?

Can you get me a job as a TV comedy writer? If not, why not? I have excellent ideas for a young comedian.

No. Because you are bad at jokes, worse at story and not good in a room.

gimmie a situation and a character, i want to write a "funny" line of dialogue, just to get feedback from a professional writer. one sentence.

Jews can be funny. The majority of TV comedy feels like being stuck in the mind of a woman (not funny).

Was just curious.

How much does a TV comedy writer get paid?

Are you a salaried employee or do you get paid per episode?

How many writers work on a typical sitcom? How many on your current show?

Other than SITCOM comedy writers, what other types of comedy writers are there for television? I'm guessing shows like Colbert and Daily Show are their own category and SNL and sketch comedy is a different category too. What about children's/teen's comedy shows like those on Nickelodeon and Disney channel? What about animated shows and cartoons? Is this all considered comedy writing or do you guys in the industry consider these different types of comedy writing roles?

Great show, Greatest name?

Most of the questions have been answered in greater detail earlier in the thread but I'll give you the quick answers again.

1. It's a huge range that depends on many things. The lowest level writer on a network comedy makes around $100k/year if the show does a full season. An upper level writer might make $500k. The creator might make a million. Again it's all ballpark and depends on a lot. In addition, writers are paid script fees for each episode they author. A script fee for a network half hour is around $23k.

2. I am paid per episode. But the total value of my contract (the per episode fee X the number of episodes I am contracted for) is divided up by the number of weeks I am contracted for and I receive a weekly check. If the production runs shorter or longer than the contracted number of weeks, the difference is made up at the end. That's the simple version and it's even more complicated than that and involves WGA weekly minimuns and script fees and other things. My agent tried to explain it to me twice and I couldn't understand it.

3. Anywhere from 5 - 15. Typical network sitcom has around 10-12 usually. My current show has 11 with 3 of those people part time. Typically there are 6 or 7 people in the room at a time.

4. You pretty much covered it. Those groups aren't distinct though, there is some overlap. Although you will hear network writers say things like "I got offered a job on that Disney show but I don't want to be pegged as one of those guys bc then it's hard to cross back over into network."

It's one of those names that you wonder if he came up with the name first and concept second. I'm going to ask him and get back to you.

Eh, clever. But it's gotta have a setup that comes out of left field, and ends with wiping my ass with Bounce as the punchline. IE ".... and that's the last time I wipe my ass with Bounce." HAHAHAHHAOWOWOMGGG or maybe "... that's my worst product mix up since I wiped my ass with Bounce". (And the crowd goes ape****!)

I think this is my white whale and there really is no joke here.

it's not a joke, it's more of a sight gag. Like someone is crapping in a bathroom that also contains the laundry room detergents and the like. He runs out of toilet paper, then waddles over and grabs the box of Bounce. It's cheap, but it's funny enough to get a laugh.

I'm starting a new "screenplay" today, and I'm really excited about it. That being said I have a 21 page outline, that no one besides myself has read, so it could very well be a mess, but I'm so emersed I don't see this taking very long. Should have it done in a week's time, and if I wasted a week... wouldn't be the first time.

Question - I use ellipses way too much. I feel it makes for more naturally sounding dialogue in a lot of cases, and I'm constantly using it on message boards, as you can see in the paragraph above.

I know the proper way to use it is . . . with the spaces, but when I write I always just go... three periods, space. Is that something you'd get in trouble for? I know they crack down on minor things, but when I write, I'm always looking for acceptable ways to cut my length down.

Ctr-f, replace ... with . . ., no time at all

nah i mean that having the spaces may cause a word to move to an additional line of dialogue, which in turn may lead to another page. it's all about keeping the script within a certain amount of pages. when I'm done, I go back and erase words to make the script tighter.

but, what you are saying is "..." is a no no?

I always write it "...". I don't think anyone cares if it has no spaces. But you're instincts are right, ellipses can be overdone. Use them sparingly.

fso,

Do you know this Whitney chick? I had never heard of her before. After seeing 8,000 ads on NBC for her new show I tried to watch an ep and found it basically unwatchably horrible. Then I looked her up (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Whitney_Cummings) and found out that she got two sitcoms of hers picked up by networks this season! So she graduated college in 2004, started getting a little bit of TV work in 2008, and now has two sitcoms on TV, one of which she stars in. You have any stories of writers hitting it big like that all of a sudden?

Helps to be hot. Yeah I wondered about that show when every as is basically her in lingerie trying to get her husband interested. Seems like they'd splice in some funny jokes if they had any.

I was only aware of her as a standup and a twitter presence before she got the two shows this year. And I'd only seen her standup on the Comedy Central roasts where she was ok, not great. I've seen Whitney but not Two Broke Girls. Whitney is one of the worst pieces of **** I have ever laid eyes on. I suspect the reason that it was picked up is that it's very rare for a network to find a female lead that is "hot" as well as funny and can supposedly write and comes with some hipness cache. So, they thought she was all those things and pounced. As far as Broke Girls, even though she's not on camera on that, I still think so factors come into play a bit. In addition to the fact that CBS likes to produce unfunny, raunchy multicams. And they're wildly successful at it.