Just to give a little background on myself, here's where I'm coming from:

I am an only child from northern Wisconsin. My parents are middle class, with my mom being the primary bread earner (kinda backwards I guess). My father had health problems when I was growing up so he was kind of the stay at home dad to take care of me while Ma made the cash.

I couldn't of asked for a better up-bringing really. My parents sent me to college in Milwaukee when I was 18. I started smoking weed and drinking when I was 13. Even before I tried pot, I knew I wanted to try "the best drug out there." (heroin) I don't know why that is, just stupid curiosity I guess.

Luckily I didn't discover dope until right after I graduated from college.

I blame my heroin use on just plain old naive curiosity while maintaining the silly idea that I could handle anything. I've always had strong will power, but that seems to have diminished over the years.

So anyway, I'm kind of an exception to the rule when it comes to the type of person who gets hooked on dope. I really had the best parents and upbringing I could possibly want (i mean support wise, my parents are by no means rich).

Most of my junkie friends have had some serious life issues be it from parents or other extenuating circumstances.

Benny,

Do you plan on quitting? It sounds like you still really like getting high. Layzie sounded more like he just shot up to avoid being dope sick and he wanted to quit.

What's the difference between powder and black tar heroin? Tar for poor people or something?

It might sound ridiculous, but yes I plan on quitting EVERY friggin' day! I seriously can't tell you how many times I've told myself, "OK, today is it. This is the last time ever!!"

And to prove how even more ridiculous it is, I actually believe myself. Of course I really like getting high. Anyone who has used dope will tell you they love it. That never goes away, believe me!

I've gotten to the point where I'm not shooting up every day anymore. I've been able to balance it off with suboxone on the days i'm not high. But like I said earlier, I just recently successfully weened myself off dope and suboxone, only to relapse yesterday. It seems to always be a never ending struggle of sober/sick/rinse/repeat

Shooting up to keep the sick off is just a by-product of using every day. Eventually you just have to use to not be sick. You'll still get a rush every time you shoot, but you don't really feel as high as you used to. Believe me, every junkie I've run into over the years with all honesty seriously wants to quit. It's just not that easy...

As far as tar vs. powder. In Milwaukee, we almost never see any tar. So I'm not really familiar with it. I've heard that tar usually isn't as powerful, but a couple of months ago, my main dealer friend hooked me up with some "raw tar" (I don't think it's possible to get anything close to "raw" in the smack dab middle of the country, but the dealers love calling it "raw") which was the best stuff I had had in ages. So I can't really tell you. I've heard tar is very prevalent on the west coast.

The three forms I've seen heroin in is a white/off white powder, black tar, and a brown chunky/powdery mixture. The one common thing they almost always share though is a slight vinegary smell.

EDIT: OK, sleepy time! Might wake up sick tomorrow who knows. I got some suboxone though so it's not the worst. I'm seriously trying to stay clean this week. I'm broke anyway, so it shouldn't be too hard! being unemployed is a great way to stop using!!

???

Asking random person for drugs
=
bad product, dangerous product, dangerous person, cops

There's just little good to come from it and it's insanely dangerous

Dope totally gives me a lazy left eye. I never realized that before

you have to repost the last picture without any swear words. For some reason this ****ing gambling site feels the need to sensor out ****ing words.

Earlier you said that illegal drugs should remain illegal but you are still using them. Does this mean you would appreciate it if you got caught and set to jail for a few years??

You also never answered my question about belief in god.

I think you are referring to the OP Layzie's comment about drugs remaining illegal. I don't think heroin should be legal, but I don't know. That's a tough subject. I think most drugs should be legal. I don't think it's right for the government to tell you what to do to yourself. But heroin has a way of ****ing with the lives of the people around the user as well, so that's a sticky subject.

I don't want to start talking politics though and derail this thread.

I have no desire to go to jail. I would not appreciate getting caught at all, since that stuff stays on your record, and I really hate being confined to one area, let alone a jail cell.

All but the last picture I posted are from almost a year ago.

As far as god goes, I consider myself agnostic. I personally don't think we have enough information either way to decide if god exists or not, so I don't waste my time pondering about it. Well I guess I think about it a decent amount, but I've never felt strongly about there being a god or there not being a god.

benny

EDIT: i'm gong to bed now, so I will answer any questions that come up in this thread later today.

Great(interesting) thread. Can't imagine face pics are a good idea in a thread like this.

lol benny you might wana take down the picture of you. pretty fkn incriminating post, and nothings private on the internet.

I think you should take those pics down as well...Afterall this is a thread started by a guy who is currently in detox for that ****.
Good luck yo..I'll have 12 years clean and sober this month (hopefully).

Have you ever been given morphine? And if so how does it compare to shooting heroin?

I ask because I had my appendix out about a year ago, and when I first showed up to hospital they injected me with morphine which was fantastic. I felt a massive rush of heat through my body and then felt pleasant, cozy-warm and pain free for the next 12 hours despite lying on a hard bench in a cold triage ward with my appendix ready to burst, while waiting for a proper bed to become available.

I've done my share of party drugs but morphine was on another level for me.

I've got 13 years heroin/methadone-free after years of addiction, and if there is anything I can tell you with absolute certainty, it is this:

You need to kick, cold if need be, and you need to remove yourself from whatever elements you associate with using (whether it's people or places).

Seriously, if you don't, this will just go on for as long as you manage to stay alive, and you will have no ability whatsoever to do the things that you still have lurking in the back of your mind to do (marriage, children, career, peace, happiness, whatever).

Two or three weeks of dopesickness is a fair trade for your future.

End of PSA.

Benny...

google "Geotracking iPhone"
have fun in jail.

Benny, I agree with the above posters about taking down the pictures...

Also, it might be a good idea to check yourself into an inpatient rehab clinic or just go straight to a hospital or something to detox and then do a 28-day program or something. Answering questions on here might be somewhat "therapeutic", but you might want to consider getting some real help, even if you've been before which is likely. AA or NA meetings will help provide you with support and growth if you give them a chance after detoxing and completing a long-term residential program. Hope you turn your life around and get back on track, not many people do.

can a mod take down the pictures it wont let me edit it...
those pictures are from last year
i'm now sober and realize how dumb that was

I don't see what the problem is with the photos???

he took them on an iphone.

iphone pics can be tracked to the exact quardinates they were taken from....its called geotracking.

and i dont believe for a second those are a year old....

this is one of the reasons you shouldnt do heroin Benny. Do yourself a favor and go get help before you end up in prison or die...and do us all a favor and rat out your dealer on the way so he doesnt ruin anyone else's life.

sept 09 from what i can tell. its nuts that one can see the location from the exif data. time to turn off geo tagging.

yeah i guess i figured there was a chance they'd be old. lol i mean lets be honest, he probably sold his iphone for dope months ago lol.

I heard a story on another board about a guy that posted a bunch of pics of random spots where he was growing pot. The cops geotagged each one and it was like a treasure map of dope leading eventually back to his house. Heard similar stories of growers getting ripped off this way too.

why some people feel the need to post pics of their drugs on the internet is beyond me.

is dope sickness from methadone worse than heroin? if not, how does it compare? I'm trying to quit methadone and having an extraordinarily hard time.

isnt that what rehab is for?

Yes, a methadone kick is tougher than a dope kick. The methadone has what's called "pooling" quality, which is the reason it holds you over for longer. It is also what makes the kick tougher and longer.

You just gotta do it. Being on methadone for the rest of your life is not an option. You'll end up a toothless mope standing in a line talking about how the gubmint cut your benefits.

Seriously, if there's any more advice you need, PM me.

Or ask me here, for the benefit of all.

Good luck!

Yeah I've heard from numerous sources that methadone is worse for withdrawal then heroin. Apparently, the withdrawal from methadone can last for 2 months or more, as compared to the couple weeks for heroin.

You might be able to taper down with suboxone, but you run the risk of just becoming dependant on that. (you don't get high from suboxone, but you can get serious withdrawals from what I understand if you use it for extended periods of tme.)

I know a person wuite well who got on a medication to get off methadone. he said it was s nonaddicting med. Something like when you're on this for a few months you can get off it and you won't be addicted to anything.

I'll call him and ask him what the name of it is and get back. I took this person to Walgreens to pick up the scrip and it was like $250 for a month I think.

So from my understanding only MD's who are board certified in Addiction Medicine can write for Suboxone, which containes Naloxone (also known as Narcan). Narcan is a opiate antagonist used to reverse the effects of an opiate overdose (it literally displaces opiates from opiate receptor sites). This should cause immediate withdrawl symptoms just becuase of that. I may be missing a piece of the puzzle but I can't imagine this is much better than cold turkey. I know most of the junkies we pick up hate when we give them Narcan becuase it kills their high, which is apparently more important to them then breathing.