This is quite common, as in this Tweet by Ryan Leng. (it could be any poker player saying a similar thing, I am not singling our Ryan Leng)

https://twitter.com/RyanLeng9/status...47004038377472

Would the players he is referring to still be his friends, him to consider them as his friends and call them "my friends", if they went broke and remained broke, or if they gave up poker and moved 5,000 miles away?

Are poker friends artificial friends based on practicality and self-interest, or are they real friends, and what percentage would you say are real friends.

Pay per view friends.

Aren't you poker playing gamble

More like American friends. Americans consider everyone they have ever been at a party with or shared a meal with their friends.

You arent really friends until you would both say yes to help each other move house in my opinion.

If we know each other and say Hey when we see each other walking around or chat when we are playing together, then I consider you a "poker friend".


Doesn't really mean that we are friends in any traditional way or have any interaction outside of poker. But we are friendly.

I live in a small town with 2-3 low stakes public games (1-2 tables in a bar). Total player pool is maybe 30 rotating that play regularly and another 30-40 that play once or twice a month. Sometimes curious tourists stumble in for a few sessions.

I'm friendly with the regs, and personal friends with alot of them. With those friends, we'll golf, ski, help each other with construction projects, bum/give rides or help if needed, etc. It's definitely possible to be legit friends with a group that also has a shared interest in poker. Granted most of that group is playing for relatively small amounts of money and it's within their budgets for recreation

What are you basing this off of? Movies? TV? Hear say? Have you ever met an american?

Many fish play poker just for the friendship and camaraderie aspect. Perhaps they are trying to rekindle experiences from days gone when they used to play a friendly game with friends every week. However, there are no real friends in the poker business.

These "friendships" are comical. These players literally get stacked by pros so the pros will be there friends. They loan money to sick degenerates so the degenerates will be their friends (for those wondering how Eli Elezra stays afloat year after year). They tip big money to dealers so the dealers will be their friends. As soon as they stop getting stacked, stop lending money, and stop tipping huge, not only are the friendships over but most likely they will have made enemies.

It’s easy to be “friends” with people you make money off of. It’s much harder when you lose money to them.

Friends share a common interest in helping each other. Poker is inherently selfish and dog eat dog so not exactly the best place to make friends in an environment where the goal is to make each other worse off financially. That’s why I find pros who go out of their way to be friendly with whales to be extremely dishonest, conniving, and low on the character totem pole.

I can see being true friends with a fellow player who is not in your immediate player pool, however.

I think Facebook degraded the meaning of the word "friend".

I have several real friends from poker
Some pros and a couple a fun players who don't even play anymore
In general I try to avoid it

I do find it funny when some reg refers to me as their "friend" when I've literally never seen them outside of the poker room and would never so much as give them my phone number

I'd say if you don't have real friends from poker you're doing it wrong.

I see it differently then most people I guess. It's like work friends. You have to spend a lot of time with people so you are friendly with some but usually it doesn't extend outside the office. You still refer to the ones you go to lunch with/shoot the **** with as friends. There's ones that are actually good friends with that you hang out with on weekends etc but it's not all them. Those are the one's its a little awkward to play at the same table as for some.

FYP

nah most people hate most of their coworkers/try to avoid them like the plague so saying friend differentiates it but everyone's different i guess

I’ve been super fortunate with the circles I run in and have been able to make a couple really close friends through poker. The people who Ryan Leng is referring to who will cheat him out of money while smiling to his face are not the type of people I maintain relationships with outside of the table.

I definitely think you have something of a point here, but I feel like there's a bit more nuance to be had

People who go out of their way to only be friendly to people they can gain something from definitely demonstrate a significant lack of character imo. But look at a guy like Garret Adelstein. All reports indicate he's an absolutely stand-up guy, but he probably also goes out of his way to be friendly with whales. Not in a smarmy, ingratiating kind of way, but in a kind and respectful way, one that seeks to foster the best playing environment for them. I think it takes a certain kind of social intelligence to realize that whales should be treated well because they're the lifeblood of the industry, but it takes a certain kind of emotional intelligence to realize that whales should be treated well as a matter of respect not only to how integral they are to the industry, but because many of them are just decent people who just want to enjoy themselves, and are paying for that privilege

projecting much?

Probably. Some people are probably more inclined to get along with everyone at the office equally and some are inclined to gravitate to a few people they would call friends and not the others. Depends on the person. Depends on the job/company a lot too though. I’d imagine majority of people who hate their job is because they do not get along with a lot of their coworkers/bosses and there’s a lot of people that hate their jobs.

What about 2p2 posters? U guys r my friends right?

I agree respect is the operative word here. But not shallow and self-interested socializing and “quality time” (e.g., Brynn and Lauren Roberts). Or being sycophantic. You can usually tell who the genuine ones are from the swindlers and plotters.

Unfortunately it's not always that easy to tell. I've read a lot of your posts and think you're a smart young man. That doesn't mean you cant make friends in poker but smarter people than you or I have dunning kruegered themselves here. including me.
Don't be too quick to make definitive judgements about people as good or bad.

excellent and accurate post.

OTOH , I kind of feel like it should be said as a baseline not trusting people at the poker table is a good idea for people who might come from a place with less deception overall.