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"So here I am, BUST-****ing-O, on the way to my own funeral, carrying my good health and heart in a bodybag - and dating my dick.
It's time to write-down my assets, and from the looks of it, I can't even buy an ice cream.
The crossroad I'm standing at, offers no easy way out. There's a shotgun and a bank to the left, and a rope and a coffin to the right, and straight ahead lies the endless desert.
I know where I'm going, because you can't keep a good man down.... but it sure as hell feels like someone is trying their best.
FML"