I was 21, and at the time I had a sideline making fake IDs. The security features on IDs weren't what they are now. I could have got back to the UK easy enough, through Canada. I was actually arrested in the office lol.

I can't go to the US anyway, I'm banned for life. Mine was a crime of moral turpitude with >1 year committed. INS (ICE, now) don't **** about.

Wait .. what? I think I resent that. I look like a ****ing boss in a clown suit.

Aww, I’m sure you look perfectly splendid and dapper in a clown suit.

Nothing! There is nothing funny about you.

So you could have forged your own passport at 21, good enough to go through he canadian customs, before you bord an international flight? With or without a wig?
And now youre mad at youre parents they didnt let you do it?

No, I couldn't make a passport. I could make an ID that got me over into Canada, through the road crossing border control in Vermont. After that I could have used my real passport.

Would you, should you or could you, if this was your son, bail him out for 50k?
Or do you think in retrospect, this plan wasn't 100% bulletproof.

Why are you asking me? I don't have children, so I have no idea.

Is the reason you don’t have children because of Covid?

Probably. Or the not ****ing chicks for, like, a year thing. Could be either.

How confident are you that you don’t have children. I know for me when I used to have a lot to drink I played poker loose and passive. I always would justify a call in a raise/fold spot.


I used to be really really loose.

I'm actually pretty confident I have an 18-year old daughter in New Hampshire. Never met her, and haven't seen her mother for something like 18 years and 9 months.

The mom did admit about 5 years ago on facebook chat that she might (read: is) mine, but she's been milking some sap for child support for 18 years, so she will never actually say it's 100%, because she would have to pay all that money back.

It's a bit of a complicated situation. On the one hand I can understand your eagerness of freedom. On the other hand I can understand your parents for not supporting what seems like a dangerous endeauver.
You're will of freedom is admireble, but getting bailed out and bailed out can spoil a person. You're character might have got destroyed, resulting you more and more problems long term. Now you're a stand up guy.

I understand your situation. I still think you should find a fun hobby that doesn’t involve drinking or gambling. Are you at all interested in the great outdoors?

Great outdoors, huh? Not heard of that bet, is that the 1,2,3 and 5 with half back for 0?

No offense but I’m not amused. You should think harder about this. So I have a different question what activity involving drinking or gambling that you’ve never tried before would you like to try?

Oooh, I know this one. Get drunk with a chick, then say her sister's name as you're tagging her from behind, and see what transpires. It's a bit of a gamble.

rich white russian

I don't know how wealthy OP's parents are, but it seems that he didn't have enough money in his own name to make bail.

What does OP's race or ethnicity have to do with his gambling and drinking problems?

I assume the implication is that rich white people shouldn't complain since they got a head start already or something, but no idea really, my train of thought derailed at "white russian".

So... Slighted?


Are you still living on backyard coffee can money from the days living outside the law, or can I find YouTubes of you giving talks to corporate security conferences for that sweet sweet speaking fee?

I am sorry to hear about the fatal addictions to nicotine and alcohol. You're still in your 40s. This is fixable.

Neither, I'm reticent to post too much info for fear of doxxing myself, since if my real name every got attached to a thread like this, I could pretty much kiss any future employment prospects goodbye. I tend to try and keep a low profile in general, so I'm afraid you won't find me on the toobz.

You really hate smoking, huh? Well, if god didn't want us to smoke, why did he give us cigarettes and make smoking so cool? Riddle me that, smart guy.

Nah, I just look like I'm in my late 40s. I'm 38.

We could have that discussion if, in fact, you were attributing your problems to your race or ethnicity or generally complaining about the hand you were dealt.

But you aren't.

1982 gang ITT. I tick over to 38 on New Year's Eve.

We certainly took different paths, but it's great news that you're under 40. Quit today and your lungs might even fully recover. No guarantees about the liver and kidneys.

I've also spent a lot of time in a local pool hall, but my drug of choice was mozzarella sticks and pizza. I am a giant so my weight problem didn't seem as bad as it was, but I still managed to shed 180 lbs from my top. I'm 6'7" and was told I looked like a dying cancer patient at 220, so I think 250 with a little more musculature is the right play. Takes time, but it's doable. Your lungs and future children will thank you.

We want to help!

39 in Jan for me. Sucks when you're a kid to have your birthday in Dec/Jan since the adults take it as an invitation to give you just the one set of presents. "Here's your Christmas and birthday present!" Huh? How does that work?!

Glad to hear you got your weight issues sorted, that's really good going. I was always pretty skinny but been piling on the pounds myself a bit during the last few years, but thankfully still not in "rotund" territory yet!