ohh jesus H christ. after rereading for like the 9th time i finally see that BTN is the 82dd and not BB. im thinking BB has 82dd and shoves to isolate UTG who obv has a random hand since he went AI dark which would obv be a fine play.

sorry sorry sorry i retract all my previous statement and admit to being a dumbass

no thats not what i was saying i was just speed reading and didnt take in everyword he said. 82 makes a moronic call there with out any real overlay. had it been how i viewed it which i will repeat i think its fin. UTG AI dark (random hand) 3 callers to BB and he shoves with 82dd all others fold (which would be BB iso'ing the dead money out there). which would be a fine play if the 3 callers will fold to the 160 almost every time (~90%)

thanks for killing a good thread

There have been some epic posts but this one is amazing. LMFAO

today...2/5nl...preflop raise and one call...flop comes 464 (suits not important) action is bet call. turn 6, bet call. river 6.

final board 46466 player a bets $75, player b makes crying call asking a if he has the 6. player a proudly turns up AK saying no, i have the ace kicker. player b turns over pocket 9's. player a looks at the board as if he doesn't know what just happened. nothing is said.

It hasn't been a good thread for in quite some time — though at least we get the occasional nugget like the not being willing to fold kings. But to everyone else, I think this guy was wrong = most absurd thinking ever.

I can't compete with this, but, on the other hand:
A 1-2NL game at Foxwoods about a month ago. Someone wins a pot with KK, and a woman who has just bought in announces that she "always" folds kings to any raise, because, whenever she has them, someone "always" has aces.
We all chuckle (and make mental notes).
About a half hour later, she raises to $15 preflop, and gets one caller. Flop is unsuited rags. Other player bets $15, and she immediately folds, showing KK. As whole table cracks up at this, the other player actually shows AA.......

lol....awesome

Tonight, I asked if our table could get a rake break when it was short-handed. This was at the Canterbury, where part of the drop goes to the bad beat jackpot. The lady to my right said she'd rather play with a full rake, otherwise we don't qualify for the jackpot.

Without wanting to explain EV, I vaguely mumble something like "I'd rather get a break of a dollar per hand than pay for a jackpot that will probably not happen."

She said, "But when you get it, the payoff is nice."

I answered, "Sure, like the lotto. But that's not a winning game either."

She replied, "That's totally different. The jackpot is something that can happen."

I wanted to continue, "So is the lotto, but are you willing to buy tickets every two minutes until you win?" but I just dropped it.

Thats the part where you should know that logic is useless.

Was playing at a local casino when someone got AA all in pre and lost. after he left the dealer was discussing how he'll fold AA pre in a cash game. When one of the players asked him why his response was, "I dont like to go broke with one pair hands."

Who does, really?

$2000 WSOP event 2008 at my table

we are somewhat deep in day 1. two players see the flop (cards dont matter). player 1 checks, player 2 (preflop raiser) bets and gets called. turn is checked, river player 1 checks, player 2 does NOTHING AT ALL.
he just sat there doing nothing. for about 4 minutes. someone finally calls the clock on him, clock starts, he still does nothing. he gets the countdown, no movement. he times out, player 1 wins the pot without showing.

everybody is like WTF just happened, but he just continues playing. he wasnt stalling for the bubble, he just kept playing somewhat normal after this incident.

bad internet connection?

After raking a $600 pot after limping with 9's and getting a flop of A Q 9 - 4 people at the table tried to lecture me that I should raise more often so people know what I have and that I had no idea what I was doing. The whole point of me limping was to disguise my hand...I just said yeah I'll raise my big hand next time.

Playing in live tourny, Dealer raises, i call in SB with 10 9 , and BB calls. Flop comes K 4 8 . Checked by everyone. Turn comes 3 . Again checked. River comes Q . I bet 1400 into a 1200 pot, BB flat calls, and Dealer folds.

I flip over my flush as if its the nuts, thinking "If he has the J high flush, or the A high surely he would have re popped me, thinking I was on a steal".

BB looks for a few seconds, thinks of folding then flips over A J .

We all look at him in disbelief. Someone asks "Why do you flat call with the nuts" to which he replies "I thought he had the flush".

Rather then laugh, I simply say "Well played" and thank god I didn't go broke.

The stupidest poker thinking I've ever come across is on this site. Check out my post in B BV "Which beat is worse". Does every online player think they are in a race after the turn because "they'll either catch it or they don't." I'm astounded, but it makes sense based on the play on most sites.

Aside from that I've sat with players who say thing like, "I'll always call a raise with 58 off suit." That usually comes after a series of unreal river suck-outs.

The worst was when dude to my left goes in the tank for at least 10 minutes after a series of all in re-raises. He ends up folding. The hand goes down with AK vs. QQ vs. KK, and of course the guy who calls with A 4 catches trip 4s on the flop and goes wild through the card-room.

I ask the dude what he was thinking about for so long and he says, "KQ suited." I go off on him. "If you don't know you are completely dominated in that spot I'm glad you're at he table. He replies the KQ is a good hand. I laugh and tell him I've taken many pot off player who think that. He doesn't believe me and me and the guy in the one seat look at each other and smile.

You clearly haven't read much BBV. It's a constant level fest and flaming dumb posts.

I was reading this poker forum one time and I was reading this thread about stupid things people say at the poker table. This isn't really said at the table, but wow, did I sure laugh for a couple minutes at this!

The most absurd poker "thinking" that I have heard is that a lot of players, who probably primarily play on the internet, don't understand that, after the flop (on any street), the second player to act cannot reraise.

^^^^^

the above is the stupidest thing I've heard someone spout at a table

You must be a real pleasure to play with.

Edit:

Assuming you're not levelling, I'll give you a few tips: Don't tap the glass and don't explicitly tell players how to play better than they have been able to figure out on their own. Definitely don't condescend to the fish, because they can pick up on it.

Basically, if you're any good at all you know it is in your best interests to try and create a fun and relaxed environment for recreational players. If they feel like you're sitting there waiting to chastise them for bad plays then you probably have failed on that front.

His thinking is absurd, all right, but your explaining it to him isn't too far behind...

Edit: see Michaelson's post just above.

Playing .50/1 game at a buddys a while back and some friend of a friend of a friend that i've never seen before shows up and commences to donk off chips all the while spouting off feat after miraculous feat he's pulled off at the poker table.

at some point during all his jibberjabber, he says something about one time he flopped some huge hand playing 1/2 at a casino and added on like $300 IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HAND and got called. seriously. we commenced to telling him that he was full of **** and that this never ever happened, especially at a casino but the guy wouldn't let it go. the guy simply could not see how this lacked even the remotest amount of logic. so what does he do?...

HE CALLS THE POKER ROOM AT HORSESHOE and asks if you can add money on in the middle of a hand. i **** you not people. this guy was as dumb as a bowl of turds.

Either a level or we have the beginning of the "Most absurd poker "thinking" you have read while reading the 'Most absurd poker "thinking" you have heard in a live game'" thread