"he replies I knew if you got a good hand you would raise."

the last wsop circuit at the horshoe in hammond,IN only guy at the table that has me covered limps i raise j9suited mid position and he calls were heads up. flop comes 10,K,A. turn was like a six or something were both sittin deep and have the table crushed. we get it in on the turn and he flips over AJ sick! so as i pass all my chips I ask how do you limp that hand? To which he replies I knew if you got a good hand you would raise. What?

I'm stealing that one.

my post was removed...guess no strat is allowed.

okay so lets go with option #2....great thread!

lol,must be a good game

happened about 2 weeks ago at showboat in a tournament

I had been pretty active, raising passive limpers and c-betting a lot. I had run my chips up to about 50k with blinds at 300/600 I think. The player on my left was the only other aggressive player at my tablke and I could tell he was getting ready to make a play at me bc everytime I was on the button, he was in the SB and had yet to defend.

Anyway I get Kc3c OTB and its folded to me. I make it 1600 and vil calls.
Flop 374c. He checks, I bet 2200 and he raises to 6k. I call. Turn 6c. He checks again and I shove. He's got me covered and snap calls. I think I'm prob beat and say 'ur good, I just have a pair and flush draw'
His response: '****' and he turns up 22 with no club. One out to win. When the river comes 5d we chop and I say 'dude that was a sick call with dueces' he responds with 'i knew you were raising garbage'

This post is correct on all counts.

I once got 4bet AI by super tight V while holding AKspades. I fold and the dingbat to my right asks what I had. I said "ace king suited". His response was unforgetable. He next asked me what suit it was and I told him it didnt matter, it was suited. So he says "well if it was spades, its a questionable call, but if it was clubs, those are the lowest suit so thats an easy fold." I was then explained how spades are the highest ranking suit and if it was AKspades, its was most likely a bad lay-down. I was laughing so hard inside but really trying to keep 'interested' in his poker lesson....

I don't know much about what his "thinking" was but this guy had to be the tightest player on the planet. At a 1/2$ no limit game I was on his right. He would show me hand after hand he was folding. QQ to a $12 raise, 66, AK etc...all to standard raises. I was like why the fffff are you even here??? He just kept saying "watch it won't hit"

^ that once happened to me. but in Omaha.
I had like JT86 in bb and checked
flop JJT I bet 2 callers turn 2 I bet 2 callers river 2 I bet fold raise gets capped and she shows 22Q7

I'm not sure if this applies or not, but it was pretty absurd/funny to me.

I'm playing a tourney at Borgata the other night and Montell Williams is at my table. Another player in a 100% completely serious manner says loud enough for everyone, including Montell, to hear "Isn't that Arsenio Hall?"

There's a guy in my 1/3 that I've seen fold AQ/AK/small pairs to no raise, nonetheless a small one, because "I haven't hit them all night."

2/5 game

Villain 1 ($500 stack) blind raises $20 utg
Villain 2 blind shoves for $180
Hero (TT) shoves for $500

Villain 1: "I have 9 high, I'm thinking about calling this. Are you the kind of dude who would go all in just b/c 2 guys went in blind. Really takes a good player right?"

Thinks for a little bit.

Villain 1: "I run a bank. I don't care, I call." (shows 98o) Hero shows TT.

Villain 1: "You probably play for a living and care about money and everything. Go f yourself"

One of the worst players in a 5-10 nlh fr game agreed to play me heads up 10-20 plo. Said with more cards he would have a better chance, and he wanted more action.

After losing his ass, he explained that the money was meaningless to him, as he was one of the biggest jewelers in Miami.

a man bet $200 otr HU with only $75 behind.

His drunk opp says 'I'm going to raise" and pushes out $300.
Dealer tells him the raise has to be to $400.
Drunk then says, "IN that case I go all in
Dealer says he is bound to $400 now.

They argued over it for a minute. Meanwhile the bettor kept looking around to verify that there was no 3rd player, He then started waving his short stack around to signal why the actual bet size didn't matter

i got picture cards so no picture on the flop i fold

He should have said "I'm going to raise you $1 more than you have and you'll have to fold" like every horrible poker movie ever. I would laugh.

I'd like to know more about this. Was he saying it seriously? Would he say it to the winner no matter how the hand went down? I need to try this lol.

not really "absurd" and nowhere near the hilarious stories ITT, but somehow shows the level of thinkin @ B&M games... i thought he was a pretty decent player before this happened... no matter what he was the 2nd best player at the table

1/2.50 game, he opens to 7.50, i 3bet 98s to 25. he 4bets to 65 and i muck. He looks at me in total disbelieve (obv had AA/KK) and asks: "why the **** do you reraise and then just fold? That doesnt make any sense!!"

2 plays/statements from the same guy... at least he's consistently absurd!

First play, Donk calls $12 pfr from sb player, Donk in ep with Q7o, and flop is Q67, 2 to a suit.
SB cbets $35 with AQ. Donk just calls with 175ish behind. Player on btn shoves with Qx for 100. SB just calls the all in with his AQ. Donk just calls the 100 with his two pair.

Turn is a blank. SB bets out 100, Donk calls putting himself all in.

River is a 6. SB shows Queens and Sixes, Ace kicker.

Donk mucks Queens and Sevens, thinking he got counterfeited, or just not thinking at all.

So I asked him why with so many players in the hand, and the draws out there on the board, why he just called those bets and never raised or shoved. He said, "Well I thought the SB had a set, so I was just calling to see what might happen"

Story 2, same donk:

Hero AKo, UTG Straddles $4 in 1/2NL
Donk 56o, UTG+1 Calls $4
3 other players call

Hero raises straddle to $35, looking to go HU or 3 way to flop.
Donk thinks and then calls, causing the chain reaction calls of 2 other players

Flop is 732, two to a suit.

Short stack in EP shoves $40 all in.
Hero shoves over top for $145, looking to isolate EP who has either flush draw or one pair.
DONK tanks with his GSSD on the flushy board, and then shoves his remaining 145 in the pot also.
LAG decides to call since he hit top pair, and feels the pot is juicy enough.

Board finishes out 5J. Giving donk a pair of 5s. The EP shows a flush he rivered, and the LAG mucks pair of 7s out of turn not thinking about the large side pot which actually was his!

The donk takes the 3way $385 side pot with a pair of 5s. I ask him why he called $35 with 56o, and $145 with nothing but a GSSD. He said "I have a screaming headache and just wanted to go home"

He then thanked me for helping him (I helped protect his hand (and mine) when the LAG mucked and then tried to retrieve his cards). I shook his hand and look forward to the next time I get to play with him!

I wasn't involved in this hand, and I was only half-paying attention, but I remember struggling to not like call this guy a ****ing ******.

Flop was 3 handed (or there might have been more players involved, but they don't really matter). 2 Deep stacks, and one guy with like $150.

Q86r.

Lots of betting on the flop, pot is probably like $100, and the small stack has just $120.

Turn is T (putting flush draw out). Deep Stack #1 bets out $60, small stack calls (has 40 behind). Deep stack #2 raises to $150. Deep Stack #1 calls, small folds.

Small stack claims he folded 97 for 2nd nuts, after he already had put in over 70% of his stack. Says that he assumed someone had a higher straight. I say, "against the range of hands though you are way ahead, NOT TO MENTION YOU ALREADY PUT IN ALMOST YOUR ENTIRE STACK". He relies "I'm a math master, odds don't mean anything when you're drawing dead". I say "I'm not taking about odds to hit your straight, I mean the pot odds you are getting, you only had to call $40 more to win like over $300. plus you have the 2nd nuts!". Then he keeps bragging about his masters in math and says that it was a standard fold, anyone at the 5/10 game would agree with him. Meanwhile, I'm just like struggling not to say "damn that is a ****ty masters program, you should ask for your money back".


And yes I know I shouldn't have been trying to help out someone so clueless, but it was so ridiculous I couldn't help myself.

yes he would say it no matter what. Typical hand with nice catch guy (NCG) and another player:

Player 1: A K
NCG: A 5

The board would run out something like that K 5 9 Q 2

Player 1 would bet the whole way and on the river the guy would call and always say "nice catch" - it really was amazing to watch how everyone would just go nuts after he said it. I was listening to music and after hearing this the first 2 times i took my earphones out just to listen to this table talk after the guy would say nice catch.

I might also add the guy saying nice catch never once smiled, he had a legitimate look on his face like he was thinking he was getting sucked out on. An example of his reasoning for saying it on the above hand would typically be "if he didn't flop a king and I didn't flop a 5 he wouldn't have made any money, I put him on AQ, it was a nice catch on his part." He was dead serious.

lawls. My 1/3 game has this asian guy who is similar but not as bad.

He will say it when he has A-rag against AK/AQ and an Ace flops. Or like when somebody folds a set, and this guy turns 2nd pair and pays him off.

Had a guy at yesterday's table who wasn't that bad at all... knew how to play draws aggressively etc... But for a certain period he kept showing me 98s 87s 54s and folded each of them. i asked why he doesnt play them and he says "normally i do to try to make a straight, but there werent many straights out there in the last 2-3 hours, so i wont play them!"

facepalm.jpg

This afternoon I'm playing 2/5 at Borgata and a guy 2 seats from me is on his iPad on this site the whole time.

I'm BB with 2h-3h.

Villian with the iPad makes it $15, 2 others call and I call.

I flop a straight draw and check. Villain bets, 2 others fold. I call.

Turn doesn't help me. I check, Villain bets, I call.

River doesn't help me. I think about trying to steal it, but decide not to. I check and villain mucks.

I am then forced to show my 2-3 and that I'm playing the board and the pot is pushed to me.

I'm sorry whoever you are, I couldn't resist posting this and busting your balls.

He actually told me his name here, but I'll save him from that embarrassment, unless he wants to out himself.

Pub donkament a few years ago, this drunk old guy was going all in pretty much every hand and on a huge heater. Eg JJ v his 82s on a jack high rainbow (no 8 or 2) all in on the flop would end up as a flush by the river. I thought it was quite funny and I was looking forward to playing some pots with him, but lots of the table were really angry, berating his play. The strangest complaint was that his play was 'bad etiquette', and this was brought up a few times. To this day I've no idea what was meant by it