I've done this.

Hero raises to $20 after multiple limpers with AA. 2 players call, including villain with a $100 stack.

Flop comes 663. Villain stacks hero with 63o.

The VERY NEXT HAND, villain tries to bluff $25 into $20 on the river and gets called by a station with some kind of TPNK hand.

Villain:

Hero laughs.

I posted this story somewhere else before but I like it so I'll tell it again here. A few years ago at the Bike playing 200nl while quite drunk I sat in the nittiest table on a Friday night in the history of the Bike. I straddled every chance and the table was getting furious at me for it. They complained to the dealer who told them I was allowed to and I was winning the blinds uncontested 70% of the time. The best part were their remarks such as "you're disrespecting the game", "what a fish!", "go play black jack, this is a poker table!" and the best was from the player 3 seats to my right " I never get to play my button because this @$$hole keeps straddling!"

Needless to say but the poker gods hate nits and I was up like $700 in under 2 hours. After another horrific beat I put on a player it was my turn to straddle and the guy I just cracked stops the dealer from dealing and calls the floor over. He tells the floor "this is not a tournament, this is a cash game and the majority of table has voted for him (me) not be allowed to straddle anymore". He and 5 others raise their hands and he informs the floor that 6 out of 9 wins. The floorman tried not to but a laugh slipped out when he informed the guy that he was dead wrong and to just leave me alone.

So long story short the table almost broke when 4 of them left to "go play some real poker!" at different tables. Of course my drunk ass donked off my $900 stack and the $600 cash worth of rebuys in about an hour after they left.

Granted I have not played as much live poker as most of these posters but this happened last night and I felt it was appropriate for this thread.

This is at a local 1/3 game with effective stacks at $360.

After an UTG raise to 15, call, call, this guy in MP raises to 55, call, call, UTG shoves for stacks.

Fold, fold, MP tanks and calls, call, call.

UTG KK, MP AdJd, others have smaller PP.

MP verbalized thought process was "I knew you had QQ or KK but I am stuck 3-grand and just wanted to try and get lucky"

This thought process carried on throughout the night.

I can understand gambling to 50 or so with AJ if that is the most you can lose but being stuck 3k in a 1/3 game and stacking off pre with AJ knowing you are that far behind I will never understand.

1-3 game at local card room. 4 limpers and SB makes it 25 to go. 3 callers including shortstack w/ about 75 behind and button w/ about 1800. SB had over 2K.
Flop: Kc9d8c
SB leads 70, ss calls w/ 5 behind. Button shoves for 1800. SB tanks for several minutes and button tables 2c4c for baby flush draw. SB now tables AcAh and goes back into the tank. Both players have exposed their hands on multi-way pot. Button tells SB, "you should call, lets gamble!" SB is still tanking after being shown an inferior hand. Everyone else is getting annoyed and clock is called after 2 min of hands being exposed. SB becomes enraged, calls the clock caller a homophobic slur, and starts rambiling about how much money it costs to call and what he could buy with the thousand dollars. Finally, as clock gets to 2 seconds, SB calls. Turn and river brick and SB takes pot. Button seems happy he got a chance to gamble for 3600+ with the worst of it and the rest of the table is stunned.

omg i´ve read it twice, cause i can´t belive the firt time

It really happened and the guy who won takes forever all the time but it was still unprecedented that he would tank after being shown a worse hand. The guy who lost has a reputation for shoving with flush draws. He usually mumbles "I gamble" in broken english and then shoves his stack in and he rarely has anything but a FD when he does it.

I've been thinking about this one for weeks and I just cannot wrap my head around what he was getting at:

1/2 NL:

Hero raises with 56s, villain calls from one of the blinds

flop QQ5 r

Villain checks, hero bets 1/2 pot, villain calls

Turn J

Villain checks, hero bets 1/2 pot, villain calls

River 6

Villain checks, hero checks

Villain shows 46s for the rivered chop

I usually try not to say anything in these situations, but a "what the....?" just slipped out on this one and villain responds "well I was hoping you had the trip Q's"

LOLWUT?????????

LOL, why the Crap was he continuing to sit there with $1800 if he was not willing to put it in as a 70% favorite.

Some moron in a donkament told me recently that he would take K10 over A7 because "It's proven that kings come on the board more than aces." I just stopped talking to him after that.

recently in a cash game

"Why do you bluff with such terrible hands? I usually try to bluff with good hands." - nitty 60 year old indignant man who plays roughly, AA, KK, and sometimes QQ.

Thats what I was thinking when he didn't insta-call. I was gonna call clock immediately cause it pissed me off but I waited and then fortunately someone else did. He is tanks on routine decisions all the time so people at this club frequently call clock on him early, in situations that they never would if it was another player. He is the only person I have ever seen have clock called on him twice of the same street!

Saw a similar hand at 1/2, guy is tanking an all-in on the turn. He flips over his hand and he has the stone cold nuts (straight) and continues to tank! Finally he calls and the table asks wtf took so long.

"I thought he might have the flush draw."

There's a bet and a call on the river.

Board is like J58J9 with 3 hearts.

1 guy shows AhJd, the other guy mucks. Dealer starts to pull in the hand when the guy suddenly reaches out and puts his hands on the cards. Dealer is still trying to pull in, guy stops it.

Player flips over 55 for the full house. Floor gets called, 55 still plays, the guy wins the hand.

We ask that player "why were you going to muck a full house?"

Player: "I thought he had the flush, so I mucked, then I realized he only had the ace of hearts which is only trips."

Hero: "You do realize a full house beats a flush right?"

Player: "..."

Today, a reg in the 1-2 game was telling me about another player at the table:

"He's not that good, makes a lot of crazy bluffs. But he plays pocket jacks better than anyone I've ever seen. If he gets jacks, just fold. Trust me."

I was playing in a small buyin tournament and after the river I had made trips. I make a bet and guy calls. I flip over trips and he flips over two pair like he won the pot. Someone points out that trips wins and he said "oh yeah, I always forget which of those wins."

Does a siren go off and a flashing red light? Hadn't seen any really good ones in a while, but this made me chuckle

The other night in the crappy little tourney at my local casino we broke from 4 tables down to 3 and it transpired that we would have to play 11 handed for a little while (until 1 player on any of the 3 tables of short stacks bust) because of a mix up and a dealer being requested at a cash table. Several people were outraged by this and one moaned ''less outs!''

I enjoyed this.


This post here should qualify for the post absurd thinking by hero ITT.

Watching a guy limp/call/ stack off with A6os, chasing him from the table and rejoicing... mind boggle.

I've been using things from this thread to sound like a total fish at the table (or rather, a different type of fish than the one I probably am). This is a really good one to add to the arsenal.

Villain is a super degenerate, but actually reasonably competent reg who is in the room literally every day. He randomly doesn't like me and decides he's going to call me a fish after every hand I play.

For instance - I isolate some LP fish with KTs, flop QTT and stack fish's T7. Reg (to some other guy) - wow that is f-ing terrible. Raising KT? That guy sucks.

Later I raise QJs, he min 3b me with aces. I end up calling and flop an open ended SF draw and crack his aces.

Reg - dude you're f-ing terrible. You absolutely suck at poker. I'm sick of playing with these idiots at 1/2 always calling everything.

Hero (in a moment of frustration): "Maybe you should move up to where people respect your raises."

Reg - stands up and wants to fight me.

I just find this hilarious that he's there 7 days a week and gets pissed that he has to play with "bad players."

This happens a lot, they see the other guy turn their hand over without knowing exactly what his hand is (even when a suckout was not prevalent) and then turn theirs over, just knowing what he himself has. Gotta love the free info.

A couple of nights ago, at a small low stakes home cash game....


A couple of limpers, and player raises 16.5 times the bb. Everyone folds. Player stacks his $1.00. Player tosses his cards, face up, KK saying "I don't want to see a flop with them, if anyone stays with an Ace, I'm toast."

At our regular low-stakes home game, my buddy folded AA pre-flop when there was a small raise and a re-raise before him. He showed me his cards and mucked them saying "I know I won't win". Sure enough he was out-flopped by pocket 10s. He now thinks he's the best player ever and the fold has become sort of a legend in our circles.

Lucky you. Your odds for shoving PF with worse holdings go up the more this legend circulates