Having to play against life-nits like this is one of my biggest pet peeves. The only consolation is when I can stack them and use their money to overtip the nice massage girl.

Multi-way it's normally someone who is hoping that the last guy(s) will also fold so that he can show what he folded and prove how incredibly unlucky he is. The guys at least know enough not to show what they're folding when there are still multiple players with live hands.

Right. That's what they are hoping for. No one cares.

As a dealer, it's more irritating to me if the players throw out their BB and ante together and they get mixed in together. If a guy throws in 600 for the BB and 3 25s for the ante and I have to pretty much individually pick up the greens because the big blind is mixed in with it, I'll just change out the 100 and throw a green back instead. What is even more irritating is if the blinds is IN FRONT of the ante, making it more difficult for me to go grab it. Although the most absurd thing I even saw was a guy who stacked his big blind on top of his ante and put it out as a stack. I had the biggest "WTF" look on my face and refused to even touch it until it was remedied. It might have been an absent-minded mistake but it came off almost as an insult and I'd never want a player to make a habit out of that.

When someone sucks out to win a big pot and then celebrates like they outplayed you.

There was this guy at the casino playing $1/$2 NLH today. Douchebag frat-bro sitting with his GF, and I notice he is playing very loose and aggressively, and is willing to go all-in on draws and one-pair hands. I open with to $12 with TT, it folds around to him and he calls. Flop comes 966 with 2 diamonds. I bet $25, he raises to $55. I figure there's a good chance he either has a flush draw or just top pair. I push all-in with my overpair ($175 on top) and he calls. We are all-in ay this point, and there is no more action. Turn is a 9, river is a blank, and he tables a 9 for a full house.

He starts celebrating like he just made a good play, so I say to him "what did you have, 5 outs on the flop when we went all-in?" He then has the nerve to tell me "you should have folded on the flop when I raised to $55." Like, seriously dude? You get it all-in with the worst hand, hit a 5-outer on the turn, and then proceed to tell me why I "should have folded?"

I've seen it once. This girl was super hot. Heads up against this dude. Flop was check check. Turn she bet dude called. River she bet. Dude says "you're so cute I'm just gonna call." Dude had quads. I don't think he took her home.

He said you should have folded in his response to your being an ******* to him. Why would you get mad at anyone willing to get their stack in with 5 outs? My pet peeve is guys like you.

The celebrating is douchey as hell, but a good player responds by saying 'nice hand' and getting on with life, not by launching into a pot odds lecture.

Why do you tell a story where you are the biggest of the douches?

Not saying that all players are doing this but there are some very good reasons preflop slightly inflate pot size when it is going to be 5+ people seeing the flop.

I was watching live at the bike yesterday and 2 guys at the table were getting massages. It seemed pretty creepy actually. Hope the masseuses were getting paid well at least.

"Pot odds lecture." I made one comment to the guy. Hardly a lecture.

Half the table thought I had went all-in on the TURN (when the board was 9669). This casino doesn't make you flip up cards when all-in, and by the way the guy was celebrating, it seemed like he had gotten me to go all-in on the turn, when he had the best hand. This made me look like an idiot and a donk , so I made the comment to let everyone know that we were all-in on the flop, and that the guy only had 5 outs.

When we flipped up our hands, everyone was looking at me like "how could you go all-in with just an overpair when there is two pair on the board?" I had to let them know that wasn't the case.

I don't like looking stupid/looking like a donkey (especially when I made the right play). Maybe I shouldn't care, but I just don't like it.

Do you know how you look stupid? By pointing out to people who have no clue what is going on that you aren't "a donkey". They think you are a fish and you want to tell them that you're not? That's how you look stupid.

I don't know what your goals are in poker dude, but you have some serious mental leaks.

Well said.

Why is there a need to be "right" in this situation? Let them think you suck, hey I miss the days at my local casino when the regs thought I was a loose fish.

On one hand, I get it. Much as we would all like to play like an emotionless automaton, our emotions do get involved in the game, and it can take a herculean effort to not want to say something to an idiot who made a stupid play and is getting paid, and acting smug while doing so. I have been known to make unflattering comments in situations like this.

But let me ask you this. Think back to all the times you have played poker and seen a bad player stack a decent player, and then watch the decent player make a comment or criticism (or even hurl an insult). Is there anything that the losing player has ever said that made you think poorly of the winning player, or make the losing player look good? It feels good to fire off some what you think are insightful and sharply worded criticisms to a bad opponent, but believe me when I tell you that no one at the table is gaining respect for you when you do so.

I get explaining yourself is tempting but there's really no advantage except if it soothes your ego. Don't do it if you can at all help it. Say nothing or say "nice hand" in a non-sarcastic manner and move on.

Had a hand today where I raise TT in the CO, BTN 3-bets and three limpers plus me call. Flop is 456r. It gets checked to the BTN who bets, then limper 1 shoves, limper 2 folds, limper 3 shoves. I tank for about 30 seconds. Figure someone maybe has an overpair and someone a straight draw. I know limper 3 is a donk who'll shove light and don't know much about the other two. Pot odds are ridiculous so I shove. BTN folds. Turn is a T, river pairs board giving me a full house. Limper 1 mucks but later says I was ahead on the flop. Limper 3 shows 77 and starts going on about how lucky I was. "WOW what a great turn card! I can't believe your luck!" etc. I'm tempted to say I was ahead on the flop but just say "Yeah, that was super lucky! Sorry man." The whole table is going on about it for like 10 minutes because it was an $800 pot and I "sucked out". The BTN even says I should have folded on the flop. I want very much to tell him he's an idiot but I just say "there was so much money, I had to gamble".

I went on to win several more big pots and make tonight my best cash yet. Point is, these situations are commonplace. I don't like looking stupid either but I'm not there to impress a bunch of degens. You just have to learn to ignore them. You don't want people thinking you're a pro. Let them think you're a donkey who's running good. You're there to have fun and gamble. At least that's what you want them to think.

more pet peeves:

Crab Men. Crab men are guys who have not yet managed the skill of using their arms without having their elbows stick out to each side (crab style). WTF is wrong that people don't know how to use their arms and still keep their elbows in their own space instead of their neighbor's face? And why do crab men always also seem to need two seats worth of space for "man spread"?

The Leaner. This is the guy who sits next to you, turns in his chair (or even turns his chair a bit to the side) and then wants to sit with his back to you, leaning simultaneously forward and back into your space, obstructing your view of the table and your freedom of movement.

The Jack in the Box. This guy apparently took too many of the wrong type of pills. Or not not enough of the right type. He can't stay in his seat for more than 3 minutes. He's constantly standing up and having to have the dealer remind him to sit.

LOL,, I ENCOURAGE my opponents to think I'm a fish. I'll help with "gawd, that was a stupid call I made" or "Oh crap, I didn't even see the three spades on the board. I must be blind...or too drunk to play"

You keep on tappin' the tank, RB. Keep those natives restless and wary of everything you do.

Why is it important to you that other players think you are good at poker instead of bad at poker?

Why does it bother you, or how does it affect you, that I am a "life nit?"

Have you heard of a book called, "The Millionaire Next Door?" The basic premise is that there are a lot of people out there living in modest homes and driving old cars--and their neighbors have no idea that they have a net worth of a million dollars or more. The way they live (watching and saving their money and having no debt) is how they become millionaires. That will be me before too long. Retirement fund is in place, home is paid for and we pay cash for everything.

But here's the best part. When my wife retires we are going to do a lot of traveling, and yes, do it very cheaply. I'm a retired veteran and we can get a free ride on any military flight in the country when space is available. Then I'll be checking out some casinos.

I am happy with my choices. If your lifestyle is different, fine. Do what works for you. Why does it bother you if I'm tight with my money?

As for stacking me, don't be so sure. As mentioned in an earlier post I study 10 hours a week. I have a pretty good idea of what I'm doing at a poker table. Just because I'm a "life nit" doesn't mean that I only open with 10% of my hands. In fact, my study emphasis for this month is Bluffs by Jonathan Little and Albert Hart.

Honestly, I know we are supposed to all hate berating the fish, but if the fish is spiking the football, as far as I am concerned he's fair game.

I think you are an anomaly if you are actually active and aggressive at the table. His disdain, mine too, to life nits applies to people that literally play tight af and are generally awful people to be around. It does feel fantastic to stack a nitty player and then overtip. But in saying that not all life nits are bad, but there are more bad life nits than good ones. The bad ones will often brag about saving money, wont tip/rarely, bad for the game etc.

isn't it easier to take their money when they're NOT paying attention???

There's a big difference between being thrifty and being cheap. A thrifty person doesn't buy expensive drinks, a cheap person will let someone else buy them an expensive drink but won't return the favour. If someone wants to be thrifty, that's their business.

OK I have a new one.

Someone keeping a seat warm with 15bb playing the passive uber-fish, limping every hand, even limp/calling half his stack to a SB/BB raise.

Reload or gtfo and let someone with chips play.