Yeah I mean it seems that when you provoke these kinds of guys that are bad and need their ego spanked they let hell break. You can go about it in one of two ways. Stop being a sook and calling the floor, he sees this as complete weak and even more of a reason to target you.

I would start by doing the following.

You need to ask him during hands when he’s likely behind, “do you think harassing me when you’re playing looks good? Do you think it makes you win more money?

After this completely stop speaking and disregard anything that comes out of his mouth. DO NOT say this when you are behind. DO NOT bicker back and forth.

Keep it simple sharp and say the same thing over and over.

You need to make these types of players who shrink otherwise you are going to kick the stool from under them.

Then you need to befriend them. Say to them, I’m not even that bad of a person and you seem like an okay dude.

Shrink the ego then befriend these people, they are small humans and it’s all an act.

You also need to understand that he’s doing this because he sees you as a threat.

My read on the situation is somewhat a lot different than most people think and the way I’d deal with it is having a few of my homosexual body building bros to come and have a chat with him.

There's always two sides to every story. I'm not saying you're a bad dude or anything, but being able to read into people above what average people are, I don't think your 100% innocent here, there's likely much more than just you telling him he's too good to play with.

Just pay somewhere else, or avoid his tables if you're not able to block him out.

Make fun of his man purse. Limp things other then the nuts UTG. You are past the point of reasoning with this guy so find things that get under his skin until he stops. Him acting this way proves you just being there winning pisses him off so doing that is a good start. Its really a lesson in not letting stuff like this linger for so long.

Delete

This happened to me when I moved up from 10/20 LHE to 20/40 LHE at Foxwoods.

There was a guy in the game who basically dominated. He was one of the best players and he tried to intimidate anybody who he felt could possibly take away any of his money. I got warned by a pro that it could be awful. The pro told me that he felt sick like he was going to throw up every time he approached the entry door to the casino. He quit a few months later.

Like you, I made a mistake when I first met him. He was having a conversation with the Mayor (actually the best player in the game who had been there since opening night like 15 years earlier) about a music group from the 1960's. I was sitting near where they were standing and I said "Oh yeah. That's a group way before your time. The Mamas and the Papas. More in your parents time frame. Not that I knew your mother..." So the table started laughing. Nick (the mayor) started laughing, though I think his laughter was more about what was going to happen to me than the joke itself. And the mean guy started in on me. All day. Every hand I played basically. I got in a few good jabs back. But it wasn't going to matter.

So for the next six years of play I took crap from him. One day he came to the table a bit drunk. He pointed to a player and said "I like you". Then another and another. Then he gets to a player he picks on and says "I don't like you" and I'm next. He points and says "I really don't like you". Which was true.

When we would play in a tournament together I would wish him luck and he would say "I'd wish you luck but I don't want you to cash". And so it went.

The thing was when I would beat him in a hand he would explain to the table how bad my play was (which was often true against him). But by doing that he would let me know what he had by inference. So I would understand why my strategy had been bad because I was beginning to understand the range of hands I was up against. As a result he taught me more about poker than anyone else. Than my mentor. Than players who shared their strategies with me. Than authors of books.

So I took his crap and occasionally responded back with stinging humor.

Six years later, I was in a game with a newcomer and the newcomer was trying to bully me verbally. On and on and on. Rolled off me because that's how I am. Turns out I come from an alcoholic father who was verbally abusive. So the players at the table are basically not capable of getting to me. And in a moment of perhaps contrition, my original bully turns to him and says "Don't bother. Nothing you say will get to him". And I felt a wave of peace and appreciation. Not that it lasted. But it was a good moment.

As for your guy, you have to learn to ignore it. My guess is he is stomping your feet when you are on his left because that would be when he wants you to change seats. Don't. Take him down every time. And don't ever let him know he is getting to you. I never complained to the Floor about what my guy was saying because in my mind it was within the rules to be a verbal bully. But your complaints to the Floor about physical abuse are OK because they are clearly against the rules and will serve to publicly humiliate him. And place him on warning with the house. If it is possible to get it on tape (like filming with your phone) without violating casino rules, then go for it.

My guy once told me he missed, I showed my hand and he turned over basically the nuts. He was the only player who ever did that to me. And yes it stung. But I never again turned over my hand until he turned over or mucked his hand. Which ended up bothering him several occasions because he wouldn't muck his bluff on the off chance that I had a worse draw. So he ended up having to show the table his bluffs. When your guy slowrolls you, understand that he is a piece of crap. But more importantly that he is not emotionally solid. He is a creep who gets off on seeing other people suffer. And he wants to get under your skin. So under no circumstances let him know that he gets under your skin.

I never discussed this thing online and actually that was good for me because my guy knew who I was on this site!!! He might in fact be reading this. So Hello! And thank you for your years of teaching. Though it wasn't pain free, which I am sure you are glad to hear.

One possible strategy:

Try to get security involved. Make a statement saying player uses abusive language and threatens you at the table, physically intimidates you and kicks you under table.

Even if guy has a cozy relationship with the floor, pushing the severity of the situation up the chain could improve your situation.

You can also write a detailed letter so floor can't deny you previously reported any incidents and now put their job at risk if a superior decides they aren't handling your complaints properly. If you have a lawyer friend, maybe ask them to help you write it.


While you can't ever fully stop players from some level of rude/inappropiate behavior, its important to stand up for yourself and assert your right to a safe space. Even if floor does a poor job of enforcing decorum standards you can also try to find other players in the room to support you and pressure this guy to back off. All players in the room share a communal interest in how the games are run.

Also - given the guy is the host of a private game, he should want to protect his reputation.

Feel free to look for players in his game and tell them what a creep he is / not to play in his game etc.



And finally, don't be too bothered about him trying to say you are super-tight. Him not wanting you at the table is all ready a victory of sorts and him trying to rile you up is an admission of weakness. This type of person is generally much less threatening than he wants to appear and may stop trying to bully you once you demonstrate the ability and willigness to strike back.

Starting a rumor of cheating at his game could be good.

It could also be very very bad. If he finds out who started the rumor.

I wouldn't lie about anything related to this evil guy (personally I now don't intentionally lie about anything anymore. I used to be a pathological liar - yes as a direct result of being in an alcoholic home - but now I don't lie anymore)

Since he runs the game you have 3 choices.
Take it and try and gracefully turn his opinion of you or wait until he finds another target.
Leave.
Or shoot him in the kneecap with a shotgun.
I suggest avoiding #3.

Grunch.... no use at all confronting him and don't call the floor at the table. Talk to the floor away from the table. Even if he's the "game host," a professionally run public cardroom will take this stuff seriously. An amateurish one won't.

So I guess if the floors do nothing then it's pretty clear what your options are. If you still trust the room not to cheat you, just ignore him.

The personal space thing is a different tier of problem though. The house is running a huge liability risk; if one day he assaults someone, they will have witnesses that they knew he was a risk and chose to do nothing. If the poker room mgmt doesn't seem to care, and it's a general casino, I would probably take it to the head of security and perhaps the general counsel. The poker room is small potatoes and shouldn't be exposing the establishment to liability by disregarding its own rules.

Needless to say it would help to have a little notebook for those convos -- "On Oct 17, Nov 3, Jan 12, Jan 19, Feb 2, and Feb 16 I mentioned to the floor away from the table that he's stepping on my feet. On Jan 12 he also got in my face and threatened me, saying verbatim, 'I'll ****ing kill you.' I see no evidence that any consequence occurred."

If it's Texas, LOL, use your best judgment.

One thing that might work (or backfire, so YMMV)
Take a notebook and a pen. Every time he does something egregious, take out the notebook and make a note. He will no doubt ask wtf you are doing, make a note of that but completely ignore him. Or have some standard reply like "writing words", "keeping my jerk journal" or some such.
It is likely to drive him crazy.

Partly this.

Do take a notebook and pen and start documenting.

But you don't just want to document what he says and does, you also want to document the floor's response; and you want to call the floor every time he harasses you or violates OPTAH against you. You want to create an undeniable trail of his behavior AND management's lack of response. Make sure you include the date and time in your notes, as well.

After you've done this a while, then you can take your documentation to the poker room manager, showing how the floor(s) have done nothing but give warnings, then ask him why this continues with nothing being done.

Then give him the opportunity to do something.

If you keep pushing eventually you'll get to a point where someone will do something to solve the problem, or you'll have a case against the casino.

But contemporaneous notes are the key. And make sure you include the floor(s) names in this. And never exaggerate what he says/does or management's response.

GL,

--klez

PS. Don't do anything to antagonize him; you want the harassment—if it continues—to just be going in one direction. And always remain calm and rational.

Update: sadly he was seated at my table tonight at a lower stake game. I wait a few seconds before tabling my hand as I was put all in before the river even though I had the nuts because I wanted to see what my opponent put me all in with and called flop with as I’d never played with him before. Harassing V was not in the hand but takes it upon himself to say “normally when you have the best hand you don’t wait for your opponent to show,” and mutters I’m a ****ing idiot again. I take note of this on my phone titled “harassment notes” and show him that I’m taking notes. I explain to the other guy in the hand who lost that he’s been picking on me for the past two years because he can’t beat me in a hand. Harassing V wrinkles his nose and says he’d kill himself if he knew me for two years. He also says is not harassment to call someone a ****ing idiot and we’re grown men and he wouldn’t care if someone said that to him.

He went on to punt a buy in and quit for his private game.

So far the plan is in motion. Let’s see if he keeps it up or mellows out.

FTR I still don't think there's any point to confronting him in public. If that were going to shame him into doing better (which was always a million to one longshot), it would have done by now.

Keeping records is great. Telling the floor soon after is great. Keep a record of the dealer, too, and the floor's reaction. If you see the dealer going to break, you can say, "Hey, that guy sure seemed to have it in for me didn't he?" Your goal is to prime their memory, so that if the floor does nothing about it and this guy erupts into violence or otherwise harasses you or anyone else (e.g. breaks your window in the parking garage), you have witnesses to his antecedent behavior.

Secondarily, you want the dealers on your side so that you don't even have to ask for a floor call. A competent dealer should be unofficially warning this guy against calling you anything derogatory, never mind a ****ing idiot. If the guy won't comply, the dealer really needs to call the floor, whether or not you ask for it.

Needless to say, tip well. I'm sure you do.

That said.... congrats on keeping your cool and carrying out a reasonable plan in very trying circumstances.

I thought the f-bomb wasn't allowed at pretty much any casino.
Seems like the dealer should have at least given him a warning if he said it loudly.

The casino you play at sounds horrible. The games must be phenomenal if you’re putting up with this abuse.

And BTW it's no excuse at all for how this guy is acting, and I'm sorry you are going through this... But when you have the nuts, it's best to just table your damn hand and move on.

(But not by any means just because the bully pitched a fit about it.)

Yeah, it has been making me wonder what place this is?
OP likely doesn't want to tell the whole forum, but I would love to know if you don't mind sending me a PM.

I knew there had to be more to this story and it's starting to come out like a little drip here and a little drip there...don't slow roll with the nuts, just table you're hand. Slow rolling to see what everyone else tables before you do is considered unethical (I'm not saying your friend had a right to call you out on it).

You're probably doing more that annoys him then you realize. If it's gotten to this point probably too late to salvage the situation. No floors going to ban someone over calling someone a f*ing idiot unfortunately has to be a bit more severe. I would talk to the floors and let it be known its a constant issue I guess if you want to pursue that route so they start taking individual cases more seriously but I doubt they do anything unless he does something more egregious. Also likely to get both parties to not like you more as more work for floors and obviously annoying for game runner. Otherwise doubt he changes tbh people who begin doing things like this rarely just stop/change their minds about a person.

How I've always handled someone attacking me personally is attack them back. If he talks about my play while in a hand I talk about his while he's in big hands. If he calls you out for doing something I do the same for him etc. Usually they just get sick of it and we both stop but idk never had anyone really hate me.

Good News! According to MD criminal code, you can file a criminal complaint against him for harassment. However I would recommend getting it on video, then when you have enough evidence, don't call the floor next time. Call the police.

Harassment, covered by state code § 3-803, is defined as following another individual in or around a public place, or maliciously engaging in repeated behavior that seriously annoys or alarms another individual: With the intent to annoy, alarm or harass.

I spoke with the floor and gave them all the details and history...showed them my notes too. I forgot to mention here that once he threw the dealer button at my hand too in addition to telling me to stfu and calling me those names. Sigh.

Re: fastrolling the nuts, I wanted to see what he had to get a read. I'd never played with him before. I immediately tabled once he showed his best two cards and did not insist on seeing all five even though I could have insisted.

You can get him arrested now for aggravated harassment.

Ya I mean I'm pretty sure I know where you play and they let a guy who stole $100 chips from his neighbor back in so doubt they'll do anything. Police route is not a great idea either it would be better to do a civil suit and try to get a restraining order but personally I wouldn't pursue that. Usually a judge wants one big piece of evidence which verifies a pattern otherwise it's hard to determine harassment so like a physical altercation or a big incident with a police report. He can simply state each of the times he did something he was provoked and it becomes a he said/she said situation. When you play cards you unfortunately deal with all types of people and frequently those that are not pleasant. Part of live poker is dealing with them unfortunately.