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Old 04-04-2020, 07:34 AM   #1
invalidname94
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Etiquette when involved in all in pot

If another player is having a rough night and down to his last chips, let’s say 50 or 60 dollars at 1/2, and you make the call after they give an exasperated “all in” without looking at their cards, is it impolite to wish them good luck? I don’t mean in the rude, needling way, just a sincere good luck that some other players will offer a rec player on their last few chips. Is there a different standard of etiquette when you are the one fighting to take their stack?

When the player does bust and they get up to leave, is it rude to say anything to them, “have a good night” or “catch ya later”? Again, in a sincere way, not trying to needle or belittle in any way. Or should you stick your nose down and stack your chips?

I always try to give a farewell to players leaving the table, but I certainly don’t want to come off like I’m needling them while stacking their chips, so I have gotten into the habit of saying nothing after busting someone for their last dollars at the casino.

Obviously some players are not in the mood for chit chat and you don’t say anything to them, but players who aren’t pissed off, or players you play with frequently, does that change anything?

Edit to clarify: I understand basic social etiquette and can tell when someone is absolutely not in the mood to talk. My biggest question is if there is a difference in what is acceptable to say to someone leaving the game when you are:

A. The person who won the pot that felted them

B. Other players at the table not involved in the pot

Last edited by invalidname94; 04-04-2020 at 07:38 AM. Reason: Adding clarification
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Old 04-04-2020, 07:56 AM   #2
DisRuptive1
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

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Originally Posted by invalidname94 View Post
is it impolite to wish them good luck?
Wouldn't you want to have the luck instead of them? Why are you wishing them good luck?

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Originally Posted by invalidname94 View Post
When the player does bust and they get up to leave, is it rude to say anything to them
Yes, winners should stfu.

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Originally Posted by invalidname94 View Post
Obviously some players are not in the mood for chit chat and you donít say anything to them, but players who arenít pissed off, or players you play with frequently, does that change anything?
What makes you think they aren't pissed off. STFU when you take someone's chips.

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Originally Posted by invalidname94 View Post
My biggest question is if there is a difference in what is acceptable to say to someone leaving the game when you are:

A. The person who won the pot that felted them

B. Other players at the table not involved in the pot
You can bid them farewell if you're in the B category or you two already have a prior relationship.
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Old 04-04-2020, 08:16 AM   #3
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

When I'm stacking a pot I keep my mouth shut.
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Old 04-04-2020, 08:21 AM   #4
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

No one has ever gone wrong by saying nothing when they win a pot, especially when they don't know the other player. Saying good luck is just insincere, even if you think you mean it. If you really wanted that player to have good luck, fold your hand after you put your chips in and have the dealer mucked them. If you're not doing that, then you don't want them to have good luck.

If they leave the table after being felted, saying something is ok if you know them outside of poker. If they want to talk after getting felted, they'll say something first if you don't know them.
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Old 04-04-2020, 08:30 AM   #5
browser2920
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

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Originally Posted by invalidname94 View Post
If another player is having a rough night and down to his last chips, letís say 50 or 60 dollars at 1/2, and you make the call after they give an exasperated ďall inĒ without looking at their cards, is it impolite to wish them good luck? I donít mean in the rude, needling way, just a sincere good luck that some other players will offer a rec player on their last few chips.
Sincere. Really? You sincerely want him to have good luck and beat you and take your money? BS. He knows it's BS, you know it, and everyone else at the table knows it. So don't say it.

And likewise, don't give the equally insincere "sorry" at the end. When you win a pot, just stfu and stack your chips. If the player is the type that gets upset when he loses, there is nothing you can say that will help him feel better. Don't say **** like "you had me until the river!" or "I had a straight draw and a flush draw" as if reminding him that you sucked out on him will ease his pain. So don't say anything at all unless he says something first. If he says "nice hand" just say thank you. If he says something rude like "how could you call that" or whatever, resist the urge to offer a snappy comeback. Just show some class and stay silent. He's not really looking for an answer, esp something like "well I had X outs and I was getting x:y pot odds so I had to call. Just let it slide.

As for the goodbyes, again take your cue from him. If he is gracious and stands up and says "goodnight everyone," then say goodnight. If he is silent and grabbing his stuff, let him leave in peace.

One exception is if he has generally been a jerk, and forgets his chip protector, let him get a good ways from the table then yell across the room "hey, you forgot your lucky coin!"
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Old 04-04-2020, 08:31 AM   #6
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

There's nothing wrong with wishing someone good luck. We're still gambling and even though you want to win the pot it's just a way of saying it's not in either of your hands anymore.

If you can read the room there's also nothing wrong with bidding the departing player a farewell or a gg or whatever. It's safe to wait for the losing player to say a goodbye first but as long as you're not shoving the loss in someone's face you're fine.

Honestly, poker is a social game in which you try to take the money of other people. Everyone knows what he's in for and if you get a hostile reaction for telling someone gl or gg it's not on you, it's on them
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Old 04-04-2020, 11:15 AM   #7
DaveC95818
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

I'll wish an all -in player some good luck if:
1. He's generally a good guy, and hasn't been a douchebag. (Most are good guys)
2. I am NOT the player going up against him.
3. I think the player who is all in against him won't take it personally. (Some do, small percentage)

I'll giver a farewell to a stacked player only if I know him personally. Its a touchy time to try and make a new friend.
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Old 04-04-2020, 12:43 PM   #8
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

I don’t think saying good luck as in “alrighty, let’s see what happens” is bad. You’re obviously not wishing for them to win the pot and everyone knows that.

When the player gets up to leave, just do whatever you would have done if somebody else busted them. If you’re the chatty guy who tells everyone goodbye when they leave the game for whatever reason, there’s nothing wrong with doing that same thing even if you ended that players evening. If it’s somebody you always say hello and goodbye to because you’re both regs, nothing wrong with saying goodbye even if you aren’t friends off the table. If it’s a new player that you talked to frequently over the last couple hours, again nothing wrong with telling them bye. But if it’s somebody you have never talked to, there’s no reason to start now after you busted them.
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Old 04-04-2020, 01:11 PM   #9
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

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One exception is if he has generally been a jerk, and forgets his chip protector,
let him get a good ways from the table then yell across the room "hey, you forgot your lucky coin!"
........................................................




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Old 04-04-2020, 03:35 PM   #10
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

If I am in the pot, I am not wishing them good luck, because I want to win that pot, so it would be insincere.

When I win a pot, I say nothing., I just stack my chips. This is the time when other players, especially tilted ones, are likeliest to take offence at any excuse. Silence is the best way to avoid that. Now if they say something neutral or friendly, I will respond, but otherwise I act like a robot. Never say sorry because it tilts the hell out of people.

If I'm not in the pot I may wish someone luck, usually if they are a fun player who has been getting felted a lot and jams it in short and light. I want them to win and hopefully stack off to me later, so yeah good luck buddy.

If I'm not in the pot, I usually say good night to someone who leaves, unless they seem really pissed and keen to leave quickly.
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Old 04-05-2020, 09:06 AM   #11
PokerPlayingGamble
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

Yes, definitely say something to people when they quit the game, whether they bust or not. My personal favourite is "same time next week?" although if they cash out big you can't go wrong with "tell 'em where you got it"
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Old 04-05-2020, 10:52 PM   #12
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

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Never say sorry because I'M NOT SORRY
......................
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Old 04-06-2020, 01:32 AM   #13
checkraisdraw
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

Sometimes if it's a real ******* who has been talking **** all night, a good needle is acceptable.

If that's not your goal, then I would just shutup and take the pot if you win or take the loss graciously if you lose. The people that talk a ton after they win the pot are always either the worst players or morons that tap the tank too much.
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Old 04-07-2020, 01:51 AM   #14
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

If im involved in the pot against the player, I say nothing. If I win the hand and bust the all-in player, I also say nothing. If he says to me "nice hand" afterwards and it seems as if he's being polite, I'll say "thank you" as graciously as I can. Otherwise, again, I say nothing. I have thick skin, so there's nothing anyone can say to me at a table that'll upset me. I understand not everyone is like that though, so I try my best not to say anything in these situations that could be considered insincere needling. The exception for me is if the player had been generally acting like a tool while he was at the table. In that case it's open season to me, but those instances are pretty rare.

If I'm not in the hand and the all-in player leaves after the hand and he hasn't been a tool while he was at the table, I'll usually tell the person to have a good night, or something to that effect.
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Old 04-07-2020, 04:37 AM   #15
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

Its fine and fairly normal to see people say this live.
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Old 04-07-2020, 01:46 PM   #16
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

Good topic .. I'm not a really big fan of the 'nice hand' scenario either. But I will suggest that it does come down to the two Players involved.

I see no issue with a sarcastic 'Gooood Luck' when two Regs are going at it, but I also would suggest limiting comments to an unknown just the same.

Very often I've suggested to even Dealers that they don't say 'Have a great day' when someone busts. They could modify it to 'Have a great 'rest' of your day' or just say 'See you next time' or 'Stay safe' ... something that might less easily be turned around.

I have no issue admitting to a Player that I suck out on that they 'had me is rough shape'. I know this can be seen along the lines of 'nice hand' but it's a more specific phrase.

'Sorry' is a really tough one to work with ... stay away. But it's used quite often within the Reg circles for sure.

We can also drag in the silent 'tap tap' of the table by a winner as opposed to the loser doing the same thing. Tapping the table by a winner could be taken the wrong way, but it's a very common way for a loser to 'surrender' or do a silent 'nice hand'.

Obviously you never know what might set someone off on any particular day .. But to get back to the OP. If it gets down to me and I ask the V if they want action .. and they say yes .. and I call .. I see no issue with following that up with a 'Good Luck'.

As with most things in poker ... I'm calling on 'It depends' for this topic but certainly with a heavy lean towards being conservative. GL

PS .. I do admit that 'nice hand' is a poker etiquette thing. It's just got issues on both sides no matter who offers it .. even Players not involved at Showdown.

Last edited by answer20; 04-07-2020 at 02:02 PM.
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Old 04-07-2020, 04:24 PM   #17
PFunkaliscious
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

grunch

let me guess...

you gave your customary good bye to the dude who got felted and either that person or someone at the table thought you were doing it in a snarky/douchy way and called you out on it. you, in response, felt that your intentions were so virtuous, or at least to your own ego, felt that your intent should have appeared so virtuous to everyone else, that you made a "thing" of this at the table, and since you did not get the immediate validation that you wanted from those present, you are now trying to get said validation from this forum.

fantastic thread. so glad you brought this up. (these are the accolades that I bestow on any esoteric or unusual thread) cwutididthere?

dude, just let it go. or be prepared to out shout everyone that you are right. it's highly unlikely that you will ever get a consensus on a topic that is so nitpicky and tedious.
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Old 04-08-2020, 12:55 AM   #18
branch0095
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

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We can also drag in the silent 'tap tap' of the table by a winner as opposed to the loser doing the same thing. Tapping the table by a winner could be taken the wrong way, but it's a very common way for a loser to 'surrender' or do a silent 'nice hand'.
Didn't even think about that one. OMG this triggers me so hard when the winner of the hand knocks/taps the table, even if I'm not involved in the hand. Most that do it have no idea that they as the winner shouldn't be doing so either. They just see other people do it and think it's a polite thing to do when you bust someone. Lol
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Old 04-24-2020, 12:58 AM   #19
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

I say nothing if I win the pot. I'll never say good luck or sorry to my opponent.

Saying those things are not being friendly or nice, it's just insincere bullshit talk. I won't get upset about it if someone says such nonsense to me, but it doesn't endear me to the player who said it.

When somebody gets felted, whether to say goodnight or not depends on their body language and demeanor.

If I felt somebody, and they seem pissed or leave quickly, I say nothing. The kindest thing to do is to let the losing player leave in peace. If they seem friendly and linger, I'll say goodnight.

If I get felted, and leave the table quickly and silently, my preference would be that nobody said anything to me. But if anybody says goodnight, I'll assume they are being genuinely polite, and say goodnight back, even the player who busted me.

If I get felted and say goodnight without rushing off, I would prefer at least 1 person at table to say the same to me. Otherwise it would seem like an unfriendly bunch.

Nice Hand is ok as long as it is sincere, and not overdone. Otherwise it becomes meaningless. NEVER say Nice Hand to the loser when you scoop chips. I've had that done to me, and it pissed me off (although I said nothing).

I say "Nice Hand" only occasionally, if I lose the pot, and I genuinely think my opponent played the hand particularly well, OR if I have been beating a player badly for a couple of hours and they finally win one, I throw them a courtesy nice hand. That's about it.
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Old 04-29-2020, 05:15 PM   #20
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

Obviously the only thing acceptable to say when you stack someone is "proFESSional!"
Spoiler:
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Old 04-30-2020, 05:49 PM   #21
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

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Originally Posted by steamraise View Post
When I'm stacking a pot I keep my mouth shut.
If someone says 'good hand' I may look up to make eye contact and softly say "thank you". Mostly I try to keep my mouth shut and wipe any smile off my face / body language.
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Old 05-03-2020, 08:58 PM   #22
Shakedown Street
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

How does everybody feel about a player singing a line from the Stevie Wonder song I Just Called To Say I Love You, when calling a bet?
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Old 05-06-2020, 09:12 PM   #23
Eponymous
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

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Obviously the only thing acceptable to say when you stack someone is "proFESSional!"
You must play at Borgata.
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Old 05-12-2020, 01:43 PM   #24
DEKE01
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Re: Etiquette when involved in all in pot

Years ago, I was new to poker in a cardroom. I won a big pot on the river and reflexively said, "sorry about that" to the loser.

He angrily told me to give the money back if I was sorry. I honestly said, "I'm sorry you're upset."

Mr. Tilt went ballistic, cursing and yelling at me and the dealer. I've improved, but I don't always deal well with people yelling at me. So as a dig, I told him, "I'm sorry you feel that way."

That made him even more angry, and I found ever more creative ways to say, "I'm sorry" to each of his verbal assaults. The dealer couldn't calm the player down.

The player called the floor over to complain that I kept apologizing to him. The floor became more than a little exasperated with the angry man as I quietly and calmly sat there. The floor asked me not to aggravate the man to which I told the floor, "I'm sorry, it won't happen again. I'm sorry we bothered you."

The floor rolled his eyes and hung back while the next hand was dealt. The angry player rebought and announced raise, throwing a chip in the pot. I asked the dealer, I'm sorry, how much is the raise?"

Before the dealer could answer, Mr. Tilt yelled and cursed in most colorful language that it was a green $25 chip. The floor gave him a final warning.

I sat quietly, unmoving for about 10 seconds, looking at nothing in particular. The dealer asked me if i knew the action was on me and I said, "I'm sorry, I didn't realize. I'm sorry, How much is the bet again?"

Mr Tilt stood up as if he was going to come after me and the floor threw him out. I got a warning that I would be next if i didn't quit being a jerk.

Yeah, winners should STFU. I had had my fun, but it would have been much better to keep Mr. Tilt's money at the table.
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