Thanks, I will definitely try that.

Why in the world does every poker table have no padding on the rail in front of the dealers? It's gotta be painful leaning into a hard edge all the time, especially for shorties... I once asked a dealer about it and she said she had bruises all over her stomach after the first time she dealt.

Next week on Shark Tank: The Stomach Saver

Start my night by dealing to this clown on 3/6 limit a few nights ago, literally every single hand he needs help figuring out whether he can bet 3 or 6, or when it's his turn, or to put his blinds out. He wins a few pots, no tips, whatever, on to the next one.

Break a table about 2 hours later, rerouted back to that 3/6 table. F***ing great. Well maybe he caught on a bit by now and doesn't need assistance every single hand. Nope. Same exact story as last time, only this time he goes on a massive heater, winning over half the hands and needing extra assistance now that he is getting multiple kill pots, some of them quite sizable. Still zero tips. I was so happy once the push finally came through.

Now it's nearing the end of my shift, next table in the push is that same 3/6 table. It's now heads up between that same clown and one of the biggest stiffs in the room. I am getting heated just knowing that's next up. Well I get over there, same f***ing story, "what's the bet, who's it on, what's the most I can raise", and like a moron I play along for a few hands.. then I decide to myself "what the f*** am I doing" and just completely ignore both of them, don't say a word, and watch sportscenter while doing the bare bones minimum of dealing. The clown tries asking for assistance the next hand and after about 10 second of me pretending he doesn't exist while facing the other direction at the TV, the stiff gives in and starts doing the coaching.. after just one hand of the stiff's coaching (in broken English mind you), the clown goes silent and all of a sudden he knows exactly how the betting works, never misses or incorrectly posts the wrong blind, and doesn't say another word the whole down, he seems like just another reg who plays quickly without thought.. you would never know he was seemingly clueless all night.. like are you f***ing kidding me, was this guy just trolling all night?

Every table I deal at, there is padding between me and the table. It’s not on the table, though - it’s in mah belly.


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Known Slow-Roller pulls off a slowroll. I kill his opponent's hand, and push him the pot....slowly....very slowly....barely moving, like a glacier...almost ten seconds of this go by before the players notice...

Just as the puzzled looks start to appear, I tell the victim, "I'm slow-rolling him BACK for ya!"

The sharper the edge the better, as far as I'm concerned. Places I've dealt where there is padding on that edge it becomes way too comfortable for players in the 1 and 10 seat to rest their arm there. That's way too close and it's hard to work around.

That's what I'm talking about. Put some razor blades between the dealer and the start of the padding.

Haha fair enough. I do like the 1/9 seat but try not to get too cozy

I offended a union rep the other day by suggesting that always giving overtime to the person with the highest seniority and never to the person with the lowest was not fair (we all started the same day, seniority was determined randomly) and that different departments/industries might have different staffing requirements.

That's amusing .... In my place you be phrasing it differently ..... Always making the person with the lowest seniority work overtime is unfair....

Why would anyone with high seniority say yes to overtime?? High seniority lets you be the first person to say "hell no!" to OT. And if they forget to ask you first you get paid for it.

That will be the case when/if we get busy again. Right now we're fighting for work, at least on my shift. We used to go by EO first then randomly cut dealers as needed. Union rules came in that say they have to go around asking stay or go in order of seniority.

I tried mentioning how other rooms do it in a fair way (random draws, based on who's already gotten overtime that week, rotating seniority list) and he looked like his head was going to explode. BUT IT HAS TO BE BASED ON SENIORITY OTHERWISE MANAGEMENT MIGHT FAVOR SOME OVER OTHERS!

They have good reason to prefer seniority. If you use random draw, or who has had more of this week it, if they go out of order it isn't obvious they are doing so. So if you get cut before Bob the only way you could know whether or not this was the proper order would be for you to check the random draw or the list of ot hours and you wouldn't necessarily know if it was correct. But if everyone knows who is ahead of them in seniority it will always be obvious if someone is skipped.

The room I work in isn't union, but my other job is.

At my other job if you start on the same day seniority is determined by your age. The older people get the seniority. Also they work from most senior to most junior for voluntary overtime and junior to senior for mandatory overtime. There's no forced EO, so that goes from senior to junior as well.

I worked in a union where people who started in the same year were given seniority based on alphabetical order of their last name

Here’s how they do it at the place I work at, and it’s been happening a lot due to lack of business.
They have seniority list, worst seniority obviously gets cut first, BUT if that person happens to be forced out under 4 hours, they will jump to the top of the list. If they work a minimum of 4 hours, you stay on same spot on the list.

Haven't posted this one from a few weeks ago:

I push in, a couple of the players are in a good mood, and immediately start praising me by name as a good dealer.

They then have this exchange:

A: He's a good poster on that 2+2, as well. You ever read his posts?

B: Yeah, remember last year? You texted me about a story he posted, you wrote, "You were in that game last night, which player was he talking about?", and I texted back, "ME!"

A: Oh yeah, then he admitted you weren't being a jerk, he was taking a little license!

YTF: I barely remember that...but I didn't mention any names, no one knew I meant YOU!

B: I did!!!

YTF: And I fell all over myself calling you a nice guy, didn't I?

(This was all said with smiles, they thought it was funny. Here's the posts, if you care.)

I hope I get to be in a YTF story some day. Tell everyone I have hair!

Plenty of facial hair that is..... I’ve dealt to you!

YTF - I should have known there was a smidge of literary license being taken to make your stories as good as they are.

The quote feature did not include my reply to the PM. The only "license" in this story was the word "snarl" instead of "answered curtly", and the fact that I slowed down two seconds and stretched it out, taking time to paint feelings, body language, and reactions.

I only brought it up because these two guys are still talking about it over a year later, while I barely remembered it.

Good writing can stay with you a long time.

It isn't as great as it sounds. Or maybe it is LOL

Having hair is definitely great.

I would know much more about being in a YTF story than having hair.