Yeah, I dealt a hand as an experiment.

UTG Q3s
UTG+1 K4s
UTG+2 A5o
NEXT 4 HANDS (junk like T6o, 84o, etc)
SB T6s
BB J7s

Generously, EPs limped, blinds called. Flop completely missed everyone. That A5o, if he saw the flop, made a flush on the turn.

Very easy to imagine no one having a hand that merited paying attention to the game for this entire time.

The players never DID notice, btw. The dealer saw the green button was flashing, called the floor over to ask him about it.

Our shufflers won't allow a standard button press to retrieve a sorted deck, it requires a press and hold of a button on an auxiliary screen. I wonder how theirs were set.

Shows you how much players actually pay attention

I assume SB/BB hands were unsuited, no?

I knew I'd get fact checked on this...

I might have the ranks wrong, but first 4 hands including blinds were suited, next hand was Ax offshoot, rest were junk.

When we had some of these machines they were set to sort with kissing Kings in the middle (that is 2 suits suited A to K and 2 suits suited K to A). Don't know how theirs were set but that might change up what the hands looked like.

The dealer cutting the cards is what would allow this to last longer than it should. Even still, on 10 out of 13 hands the dealer is going to deal out 3 suited-connected cards on the flop. That should be noticed.

I was going to say a player should have noticed the dealer acting confused and holding down the "SORT" button on the touch screen to open and close the lid instead of hitting the green button, but then I remembered most players are either on their phones or off in their own world most of the time.

My first down last night I push in and see the deckmate 2 is showing a 3H missing. I scan the area for extra cards and see none so I reset it and hand shuffle the other deck. I deal out the hand and again it says 3H missing. Crap. After the hand I check the deck I just used to make sure it didn't have a purple card mixed in. Whew, no purple.

Chinese guy who knows only basic poker English is in seat 1 badgering me about what's wrong with the deck. Right side of the table keeps acting out of turn. Middle of table is busy watching some sports thing on the TV behind me and not paying attention. The rack is in shambles and I'm trying to get it organized.

I pull the deck out and count it down. 51 cards. Scan the table again, no spare cards. I call the floor and keep dealing. No floor comes, so I continue calling floor while I attempt to run the game. Floor, who had been busy fiddling with a broken shuffler and dealing with a flood of games breaking after a promo ended, finally arrives.

I tell him I just pushed in and there's a card missing from one of the decks.

Hardly worth mentioning.

Just like the bad beat story that you already know the ending of ... GL

You'd better believe I did a double-take this morning when the first flop of the day was suited ace, deuce, trey.

I enjoyed it a little less because I have to consider that I was unable to get a job in that room despite a handful of tries including when they first opened. How terrible must I be if I can't work where that happened?

I said the same thing. I only worked (still do) in one room with the Deckmate 2 that suits the deck and it is set up to make it very obvious that it is in that mode by flashing and you have to hold down the button on the screen for a couple of seconds - you cannot use the button on the shuffler to open it.

Although in fairness, the cards were likely in the same order but they were almost assuredly cut differently every time. If the dealer is only seeing a board (and that is when a flop happens) and it's subtly different but not exactly the same, they're not gonna assume the worst.

Honestly how often do you put out a flop and the next one is kind of similar and half the table oohs and aahs about it? You hear that so many times for boards that are relatively dissimilar to the last flop you dismiss it with an eye roll. Even I do and I am not nearly as jaded as others are.

So I think the dealer can be cut a break maybe, but maybe not considering the machine should have been making it very difficult for him in sort mode.

Guy who always blames me for his losses flops a straight, gets raised when the board pairs, starts grumbling immediately and shooting dirty looks at me. Crying calls turn and river, really winding himself up, ready to earn a penalty because this hand is gonna cripple him any way...

... his straight is good. I push him a huge pot. He's stunned.

I said to his opponent, "You think YOU'RE disappointed? This poor guy doesn't get to yell at me now!"

Had a rare 8am shift today.....basically covering a shift for a full timer on vacation. I walk into no game which can happen....sometimes the game doesnt quite make it all night and into the morning and wont fire up until 9am or so. So I am doing the board for the people trickling in. Second guy shows up and wants to sign up for our 11 am tournament which we dont have. He tells me he was here last week and there was one. I told him the only 11am tourneys we have are on Saturday & Sunday. After back and forth a few times I tell him our sister property has a $40 tournament and thats what he was probably thinking. He still thinks I am wrong and shows back up at 11 dissapointed to not find a tournament.

Fourth guy that walks is an elderly Asian gentleman that starts complaining that he tried to call in but our phone was not working. Sure enough our phones are working just fine as I call on my phone right in front of him. He said he tried calling in the building as well and his phone would not work. Come to find out he has Sprint which is spoty at best at our casino because we are behind a mountain. He then wants me to fix it and then grumbles when I tell him I dont know how. He then proceeds to complain that there is no game going and what time a game will start. Apparently my answer of "Im not sure but Im sure we will fire up within the next half hour" did not appease him and he storms out grumbling.

About five minutes later I watch two elderly gentleman get into a mild argument about locking a seat up apparently both wanted seat five and even though the one gentleman put his players card there 20 minutes prior the other guy moves it and sets his card protector there thinking that because he was here last night he gets first priority. Fun part about all of this was this was all before I dealt a single hand.

Day goes pretty good after that but about 1pm another wrench thrown into the day.......its time for the annual money laundering class that was going on in our building. As I jump for joy and click my heels I trudge over for the meeting that I essentially just did during the new hire orientation a few months ago. I got super lucky, I did not fall asleep and nobody in the class asked 15 stupid questions and it got done super quick.


To finish off the day guess what.......my schedule for the next two weeks are all 8am starts.....joy to Ol' Gil

It's like groundhogs day. An endless loop of that nonsense.

If you want to have a fun time with guys fighting over seat 5 ...... Open the game on a different table....

I had a guy call one day this week and ask what games we spread. I ran down the list, and he was really interested in 8-16 LHE, which we don't run (10-20 is our usual limit game).

The next day a guy comes in around noon, when all we have running is a 1-2 NL. He swore that he talked to someone yesterday who said we would have a 3-6 Omaha running. I do my best to apologize to him about any mix-up, knowing full well that no one on my staff would have told him that, or anything close to that since we haven't run 3-6 O8 since I've been here. He is incredibly angry at me. He even wants reimbursement for his travel expenses! He refers to a casino in Arizona where they have all sorts of games running. I told him that I'd love to have a full room at noon on a Tuesday. He also told me he's been in 50 poker rooms, yet he had no idea what Bravo was when I referred him to the app to find out what games are where.

Eventually he got a seat in the 1-2 game, and I got him a players card. Turns out he's the same guy who called the day before asking about 8-16. Caller ID is a wonderful thing. Amazingly he played 1-2 for a couple of hours and hardly made a peep.

I've got a few hundred of these stories of my own, but it just never gets old hearing more of these. Poker attracts the bottom of the barrel for some reason. I guess it attracts all types, but we really take note of the bottom 10%.

I'm watching the brush stand at 2 AM on a Wednesday night during my break so the brush can go have a smoke. New guy walks up to the stand.

Guy: Hey, do you guys have 1-5 spread limit hold'em?
Me: No, but we do have 2-4 limit hold'em
Guy: Ok, do you have a game going?
Me: No, all we have right now is 1-2 and 2-5 no limit. Oh, and a game of 2-2 PLO.
Guy: What are the chances of getting a game of 2-4 limit going right now?
Me: At 2 AM on a Wednesday? About the same chances as of you calling up 8 of your friends to show up and play 2-4 limit with you.
Guy: Oh. Okay. Can I play 1-2 no limit?
Me: Sure! Buy your chips at the cage and head over to table 6.

^A pleasant, normal human interaction feels out of place here

Slight variation where I work. They come in at 1am asking about 2-4LHE and I tell them the smallest game we run is 3-6. Any chance of getting a 2-4 game? No, we don't offer that but we often get 3-6 going during the day when we have high hand promos running. So no 2-4 then? No, sorry. We do have an open seat in 1-2NL though. Oh no, no no.

You can see every table in my room from the desk. Easily. Its basically a blizzard outside one night, but I still manage to have one game going because, well, I really have no idea why these people risked their lives to be here but anyways... Guy walks up to the desk, points at the table, and says "that the only game you got going?". I turn to look at the game. Turn back to see if he seems serious or if he's trying, but failing, to be funny. He's serious, so I say "let me check" and sit down at the computer and pretend to click a few things. "Yep, looks like that's the only one I got and there is a seat open. You want it?" He says "Nah, I'll check back later".