Seriously, stop leaking money and get yourself a good therapist or counselor or psychologist. Figure out why you have the problems you have and sort them out.

I hope you can look back on this period of your life and have it feel foreign to you, because you are so far removed from your self-destructive past.

It sounds like you really hate your roommate, and hate yourself marginally less...so the good news here for you is that both of you ended up worse off.

Hate is such a draining emotion. I don't hate him and I don't fault him for being who he is, no one gets it right but we're all supposed to try. I don't understand all the vitriol in this thread.

You blast me telling me I'm a moron for not letting a fish put dead money onto the table, and then when I tell you I give away money because I don't like it you tell me to plug the leak and stop putting dead money out into the world....

It really seems like you hate him, as that’s the most logical reason for what you did (and wrote at concerning length about.)

You’re not interested in the poker aspects (one or two cards) of the high hand. Most here say it wasn’t actually eligible. Maybe it was.

And as for etiquette, this is different than a standard showdown OHTAP situation (though the current high-hand holder would disagree), and I think most people would at least try to nudge a friend/acquaintance towards showing. Maybe some raised eyebrows and looks towards the HH board.

So this doesn’t seem like a poker etiquette question, but more like one chapter in a strange psychodrama playing out mostly in your head where you’re trying to passive-aggressively punish/teach this whatever-we’re-calling-him and telling us and mutual acquaintances about it.

So it’s complicated.

I do not hate this person, I promise. Everything else you've pointed out is on point. I just happen to believe that the difference between someone telling you how they ****ed up, and you ****ing up yourself is huge. When you **** up, you know exactly what went wrong and what to do differently in the future. If I had alerted him I don't think it would be as deep seated in his mind as if he had found out later what he missed. Kind of moot point since I haven't told him and don't plan on it but I was just looking for advice should I run into this in the future.

As for the length of my posts, this is just my nature. I blabber a lot. I am manic-depressive bi-polar and this is one of the side effects.

You can just close or delete this thread. The universe is funny. He popped tall today cleaned up got a full time job doing what hes good at and basically had a car gifted to him for $700. Seems the collective consciousness sides with you guys.

Youre in a forum full of poker players, spewing information thst you have a big ego and think you are good at poker while saying you dont. I mean maybe we are all wrong, and I could go word by word to show you specific things youve posted that led me to my conclusion but thats some nitty gritty i dont feel like dealing with right now. Its pretty likely most of us can read you better than you can read yourself.

There are 2 clear reasons you didnt tell him. 1) you dont like him (i agree hate is a strong word, but you like him less than a complete unknonw, who will get the money rather than him due to your actions.) 2) you arent gonna help someone who doesnt take your unsolicited advice, because he turned down your boring advice so now screw him on this right? I 100% guarantee if he had graciously taken your advice and humbly deferred to your poker superiority, you woild have told him.

This applies to whatever game type... poker, mini golf, bowling, most people dont want your advice, and most people who think they are good at something cant help but spew it onto every person within earshot (one of the telltale signs you got a very self important opinion of your poker skills). Go bowling with literally anybody, there will be someone in your group who just wants to chuck the damn ball down the lane (and often into the gutter) and some thinks hes good player with a 105 average falling over himself to give that individual unsolicited advice which invariably leads to that person not having fun.

For what its worth, to answer the question, I wouldnt tell a guy I dislike that they won the HH. I also wouldnt drive an hour to the casino with them. I also wouldnt do anything to even mildly encourage a stupid person with serious financial problems who owes money to my friends to play poker. So this is one of those hands where you ask “what do I do on the river???” When you screwed up preflop, flop, and turn.

^^+++++

And to make it worse, you are choosing to let him live with you. If your relationship is as poor and superficial as you say, my advice ask him to leave. You will maybe be happier, if you even can be happy.

This line, imo, is the crux of the whole thread right here. You need to really figure out why you think this is true. It seems to me that you just wanted to avoid the situation that you think is inevitable when he doesn't pay back any of the money he owes people? That may be true, but it may not be true. Or maybe you really wanted to do him harm?

I know it's not exactly like you're ripping 1.1K out of his hands and flushing it down the toilet because he doesn't even know about it, and of course it IS on him to have known. I'm trying to think of an analogy...maybe something like some guy in front of you doesn't hold the door for you when leaving some expensive store and you notice him setting his bag on the roof of his car while he unlocks his door and forgets the stuff as he gets in...and you don't tell him because "**** that guy, am I right?". You could have easily said "hey, your stuff" but instead, with zero actual gain on your part, you let it happen for no other benefit than your little smug-self-congratulatory-feeling that you will share with no one but yourself.

I dunno. Seems pretty pointless to me


If you really don't like the guy, just remove him from your life.

True, you might not. But, you might.
It was around here I lost most of my siding with you. this just sounds so selfish.