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Originally Posted by n0_escape
A very interesting discussion! I have not read it whole yet, but I think I have to share my POV with weed and how it affected my life. I started smoking when I was around 18 (7 years back) and did so with my 3 friends whom we've been running a PC gaming café at the time. At first I enjoyed it so much, we usually gathered in the evening, smoked pot, listened to some crazy music and then spent half of the night playing dota or something. So much fun, can't even describe how much.
About 2 years later I started to enjoy the weed more when I smoked alone at home and did something that involved me to think a lot and I've always been kind of a PC guy, so - watching psychological movies, playing difficult or sandbox pc games, reading, etc. I enjoyed those kind of things mainly because, thanks to the weed, I was able to see many different unrestrained perspectives to a lot of things which I normally wouldn't be able if sober. I believe these creative thoughts were the main reason I smoked in the first place but I was also becoming more introverted and socially distanced.
It was this period of my life I started to play online poker and had several relatively big hits on MTT's and even today I trust it was partially thanks to weed that gave me the right focus and a different perspective view on what was happening on the table + being creative (also the fact I enjoyed the game much more I guess). I also started playing live poker which I wouldn't recommend combining with weed, at least for people that tend to be more introverted and overly thoughtful while playing stoned like myself.
Anyway around 2 years from that point I started to notice different effects than I was used to // After getting high I was feeling very anxious, wanted not to get involved with other people at all and just sit at home, play some pc games and don't care about the outside world too much. I didn't even take up phone calls or answer door bell rings. My self-confidence went quickly downhill and so did my poker performance and I felt really alone at times and started to think about downsides of the weed for the first time.
I have to say I never smoked a lot, usually 1 gram could last for a week, the effects were pretty strong on me even with really small joints. I also never felt any kind of addiction, I believe what people think might be psychological addiction on weed is in fact just a routine you get used to over time. I quit smoking about a year ago when I got a real job and never looked back. It was really easy too, never felt any kind of need for it since. Sure, I don't reject a joint on a occasional party or something but I swore to myself to NEVER again smoke alone. Weed gives a lot of positive and creative thinking in the beginning if you're the right kind of a person who can accept it but over time it starts to diminish and the downside negatives take over, at least that's how it worked for me. I used to judge people a lot, make assumptions based on looks, now I treat environment around me with respect no matter what they appear to be. So I am very grateful for this experience it gave to me but even more glad I realized when was the right time to stop and move on. I believe weed has the power to change your personality permanently in a good way if you know when to stop because you might end too isolated from reality. At certain point you're not getting any benefit from it anymore and you smoke it just to feel "normal" - that's a good sign to stop.
TL;DR - smoke weed, be happy, but don't let it take control of your life.
Good post. Without giving you my life story, I will say that you're by no means alone in how your smoking escalated over time. I smoked for the first time at 16 years old and it remained a totally once in a while thing until about 18/19 when it started to pick up in pace. I was a three sport athlete my whole life and as sports/school started to wind down (as I was by no means serious about college at the time) and I was only playing baseball and lifting weights at that point, it allowed more free time and more down time. I started smoking while playing video games more and more and smoking started to become synonymous with having fun.
When I was just about to turn 21 I lost someone unbelievably close to me, suddenly, and he was only 29. It wasn't the first time I lost someone like this but this one ...really hurt my core. Bad. I changed a lot as a person over the next 12-24 months and eventually wound up working a couple of decent jobs (I'm very entrepreneurial), making some good money, and feeling more well rounded than ever. The thing was that I was smoking daily at this point and about 3+ grams a day. I had a run there for a few years where I was playing MMORPG's a LOT. I played FFXI online and WoW pretty much as heavily as you could for a good 30 month period at one point. There were times I would be up, playing and smoking, for 2-3 days at a clip.
I stopped playing video games at 26 and I haven't played a computer game other than Chess or Poker in about 4 years. I'm 32 now. What I haven't mentioned is my history with alcohol...which is a totally on and off thing over the years but I've really, really cut it back over time. At this point I hardly ever drink at all. I have always, always preferred weed to alcohol. To be totally honest, alcohol is just something I've used to substitute or enhance weed since I started smoking. If weed was legal and sold in the store like beer and liquor, I doubt I would ever buy liquor. I don't as it is now and weed's still not legal.
I still smoke all the time. I've stopped for a month here or there but always find my way back to it. I just can't sit around for weeks at a clip, stone cold sober. I'm playing poker at a 30,000 hand per month clip right now and it's difficult to
not smoke before sessions and on breaks. I'm working on it. It bothers me whenever I buy weed because if I buy a dub it's $20 and that's 5 BI's at 4NL. Thinking about it like this has started to really make me desire to buy weed less, but it's a really old, strong habit at this point and it's not the easiest to just stop. I'm trying to take a t-break right now and it's difficult...especially since my girlfriend smokes too and her will power is pathetically non existent lol.
My advice for others is this: If you're going to start enhancing experiences with marijuana...be very careful. You do not want the experience to become about the marijuana itself, but instead remain about the activity primarily. Don't always smoke before you partake in this activity. Try to do it afterwards, just a half a gram or a gram, as a sort of reward and celebration as you reflect back on what you've just experienced. If you begin always smoking before things you enjoy, smoking on breaks throughout enjoying them, and associating marijuana with this activity, eventually you will be more interested in smoking pot than any activity on it's own and you will have a very difficult time finding enjoyment in things without getting high first. No matter what's going on in your evening, you're going to keep drawing comparisons and saying to yourself "this is great but it would be so much
better if I was high". Once this has started, it's time to back away from the bowl and lighter and give yourself a break. If you keep going down this road, your smoking will increase, it will replace other activities entirely (instead of simply supplementing them), and you will smoke just out of habit and not even to get high anymore. Once this happens, you are passed the enjoyable point of smoking and now basically "drug using" habitually. Guys - this has never worked out well for one person in the history of humanity. I doubt you'll break that streak.
Keep your smoking to a minimum, as an end of night routine or something you do mildly to supplement the other things you enjoy in life, but leave it at that. Do not be smoking when you get up. Do not make smoking such a part of the activities you enjoy that you can't enjoy them without being high anymore. Do NOT smoke more when you're tolerance starts to escalate. You will simply raise your tolerance even higher and eventually barely even get high anymore. Trust me...I know what I'm talking about through vast experience. This can be a great, harmless, enjoyable recreational drug for most people. It can also be another costly, disruptive, counterproductive habit that you wake up and realize you need to remove from your life. By staying disciplined and not letting weed control YOU, you will enjoy both smoking and the rest of your life far, far more in both the short and long term.