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Old 08-26-2019, 03:24 PM   #101
Phat Mack
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Nothing wrong with a 37 yo guy dating a 19 yo girl, but just consider it your chance to see that she has fun. If you seek emotional satisfaction, that may be too big a burden for her.

I consider In The Mood for Love to be Wong Kar-Wai's remake of Dumb and Dumber, so there's that.
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Old 08-27-2019, 05:02 AM   #102
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Whaaaaaat? I saw your reason in the Lounge thread, I can understand. I went out with Sugar Baby Girl for a few months last year after she turned 21. But I bought her a $1,300 phone on the second date. Dumb and dumber right there.

I'm skeptical this will lead anywhere with the Japanese girl, but like Chow and the second Su Li-zhen, I feel compelled to follow the necklace and that name. It helps that she's cute and seems to have a friendly personality. I'll just have to switch up my game a bit and make sure it's all about having fun.

What did you think of the original Story of Floating Weeds by the way?
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Old 08-28-2019, 05:21 AM   #103
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Well, I am officially off the wagon tonight.

Sometimes I put thought into these posts and utilize structure in my writing, and sometimes it's just drunk stream-of-consciousness thinking. Tonight is the latter. Despite not having anything to do except decorate my apartment, I got tired and fell asleep and woke up at 11 p.m. Los Angeles time. Hungry for dinner. I didn't want to eat Asian food again, so there is this British bar and pub down the street. I went there. They close at 1 a.m. Lots of time.

Except, nope. The kitchen closed already. Dumbfounded, I decided to order a drink before looking somewhere else. My usual: old-fashioned, please. The bartender serves me up and I'm sitting there alone again. Drinking by myself. There's a guy and girl in their 20s next to me, I can't tell if they are on a date or they just met at the bar. They both work in the film industry, and the guy talks about himself way too much. Then come the curse words. Fine, whatever, if you are friends or in a relationship or comfortable at that level. But this is clearly a bar-meet or first date. Have some decency around the lady, please.

Anyway, the guy wants to brag about his film industry jobs and somehow they end up discussing camera lenses. I had decided to stay out of their conversation, but when they start talking about the beauty of sophisticated shots, I felt the need to interject. The greatest filmmaker in the history of the universe only rarely utilized crane or dolly shots, and otherwise filmed exclusively in 50mm because it closely matches the human eye. The girl immediately interjected with her protest, as if she knows better than The Great Yasujiro Ozu. The guy, who I previously detested, listened observantly, and scored some points when he accepted my points.

Well, I made an error. I'm drunk so I have no recollection whether the girl was attractive or not, but she mentioned she was a regular there, and I had decided to keep ordering drinks in case I outlasted the guy or he took a bathroom break or something and I could chat her up. Really, all I was looking for was a drinking buddy. Maybe a high class prostitute. Take your pick.

Three old-fashioned drinks about an hour later, I finally had to take my leave. I walked down the street to the sake and sushi bar close to my apartment, and ordered my favorite dish. Eel and cucumber roll; also some rice and chicken yakitori, and a full bottle of sake, please.

It's a sobering feeling sitting there alone, the supreme confidence building inside you, as you remember that up until a few months or a year ago, you could have any woman you wanted or through your charisma could even knock an upstart fellow back on his feet. Instead, you are washed up, burning with desire, desperately in need of a haircut and windshield repair, but willing to walk into the flame and confront destiny, whatever your fate might be.
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Old 08-28-2019, 05:34 AM   #104
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Another thing: I just ordered all of my kitchenware, and don't have furniture for my living-room yet. That's next on the list. With no internet, I sit here in the lounge all night, night after night, utilizing the free WiFi. Some of these people are religious about their fitness routines.

There is a Korean guy who comes here and works out for exactly one hour around 1 or 2 a.m. every night, but he's not here this time. Somehow, I'm disappointed with his work ethic. In a few hours, there will be a white girl, who is slightly above average looks, but perhaps below my starting point; nevertheless, I've never been turned on by a woman's panting on a treadmill, morning after morning, over and over again. She has this over-exaggerated Serena Williams moaning and panting vibe; part of me thinks she's trying to put herself out there, but then I remember I'm sitting here looking unkempt, in my late 30s, wearing a hoodie, in need of a shave and haircut. Do people really make that much noise?
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Old 08-28-2019, 01:35 PM   #105
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

I am really sorry to hear of your fall.

You seem to be good people and deserve to treat yourself better.
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Old 08-28-2019, 04:41 PM   #106
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Thanks Doc. I think I should treat myself better too. Part of the problem right now is boredom. I don't have kids or a woman or job to keep me in line. I'm here to get back to being productive with my writing, also finish my guitar lessons for fun, but I'm not comfortable in my new place yet. Still need to get settled in.

I might play cards at the Bike soon. Although I'm not here in LA to continue down that road, seems like a healthier activity choice when I'm bored and a way to make a little extra money.
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Old 08-29-2019, 07:24 AM   #107
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Your mention of The Bike reminds me of the one LA trip a friend and I took which included playing there.

We were at a stoplight and some guys started getting into an argument. One guy, to the side and slightly in front of us, couldn't roll his window down so he flung his door open. The other car was directly in front of us.

If bullets had started flying, we were in great danger of getting hit.

Thankfully, the light turned green, the argument ended, and we made it safely to The Bike.
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Old 08-29-2019, 01:04 PM   #108
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

I am going to be taking a break from here for awhile, but didn't want to leave without giving you some advice.

1) Remember that sobriety is like walking. You do it one step at a time.

2) If you go out with the 19 year old, treat her as her. Don't treat her as the reincarnation of a lost love.

3) My most important piece of advice....

Spoiler:
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Old 08-29-2019, 05:42 PM   #109
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Thanks Doc. Stop by anytime. I wish your wife a speedy recovery.

----------

By the way, the other night when I was walking home from the sake and sushi bar, I stopped at a convenience store. A somewhat older black man held the door open for me, and I said thanks. Later, when I left the store, there he was again, holding the door open for other people too.

I asked this man, "how come you're just standing here holding the door open for everyone in the middle of night?" He hesitated a few seconds, then replied: "just trying to do a nice thing for people, then maybe they'll help me out."

Now there are homeless people everywhere here in California, and I mean everywhere. Some have tents. Some have nothing more than a chair or couch or something to sleep on. They just sit there and stare into the void, nothing else they can do. Wherever I drive, when I get stopped in traffic or at a light, there they are with their signs and begging. It's sad to see, but you can't help these people; almost invariably, any act of kindness will just enable them to continue down their self-destructive paths, or worse, cause you to become a victim of violence yourself.

But I was struck by the quiet dignity of this man. I have never lived on the streets and I never would, but like the Indian legends Nala and Yudhishthira, I have gambled away my kingdom. I have been hopelessly poor many times in my life: almost always as a child; in college; and a couple of times as an adult. People have looked over me, or mocked me, or disrespected me or screwed around with me because of my station. I know that if I found myself in the same circumstances as this man, I would behave just as he did. No asking money from strangers. No holding out my hand. Instead, I would hold onto whatever pride and dignity I had left, and just do good things in the world, and hope that everything might turn out alright.







Now leaving aside the idle aristocracy, there are two types of successful people in this world: those who are like Young Vito Corleone in The Godfather Part II, who always return a favor, and always remember everyone, even the poor old grandma who is about to get kicked out of her apartment; and then there are the Tracy Flick's of the world, from the movie Election: the ones who work very, very hard to achieve their success, but they manipulate every situation and scam to their advantage and step on absolutely anyone they have to in order to reach the top.

The higher up you go in the world, whether it be poker, sports, business or politics, or any walk of life, the people become more and more ruthless. Is it really worth it to succeed and achieve your dreams, but lose your soul in the process?

I know I'd rather be one of those people who always helps the little guy everyone else out. I told this man -- the one holding the door open for me -- that I didn't have any cash on me, but I just moved into the neighborhood. I'll be around and if I meet him again, I'll make sure to help him out. And I will-- even though I was drunk, I remember his face and his name. Who knows if I will buy him a meal or hotel room for the night, probably whatever useful thing he tells me he needs (within reason), but I'd also like to find out more about him and what skills he might have and try to find him a job.

You might think that's hopeless, and maybe you're right. But it's worth a shot. You can't help everyone, but if you can make a difference just one person at a time, then I think that would be a pretty good life.
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Old 08-31-2019, 05:14 AM   #110
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Went out for dinner tonight and once again ordered eel and cucumber roll, chicken yakitori, and rice.

Apartment is as far along as it can be, so I went out drinking at the British pub tonight. Google and website and sign on front door tell me they are open until 2 a.m. but bartender tells me last call will be at 12:30 because she doesn't feel well and wants to go home. I look at her incredulsously, but what choice do I have? I oblige.

I walk out the door ad I get stung in the eye by a bee, just like Mr. McAllister in the movie Election, which I just referenced and re-watched. I mean, I'm a little drunk but seems like a life joke. I haven't seen a bee in three weeks since I've been here in Los Angeles. I just went 0/15 in coin flips this summer in Vegas, go ahead and calculate the odds ... but it's getting to the point where I'm ready to give up.

I just wanted to retire for the evening to the fitness center and lounge. There is this rando Korean guy (not the usuals) working out ... I waited 30 minutes so I could come down here and listen to music and cry and pass myself out ... but no, this random dude is doing a 2 hour workout with no signs of quitting at 2:30 a.m. on a Friday night.

**** my life.
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Old 08-31-2019, 05:33 AM   #111
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Well I'm a little drunk but not much, and literally sitting here with a wet paper towel over my eye. After getting stung by a bee, after referencing a movie where that happens to one of the main characters, after seeing a picture of a girl with a necklace with Ohio State Girl's middle name.

Since the last 13 months, every single day has been worse than the previous one, every single week has been worse than the previous one, every single month has been worse than the previous one.

Every single bizarre ridiculous ****ing thing you could ever imagine has happened to me, **** **** ****, **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** ****.
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Old 09-02-2019, 04:01 AM   #112
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

My date with the second Su Li-zhen has been postponed until next weekend.

Not that it matters, since I'm a walking curse right now.







If I ever find the voodoo doll, I might just get it over with and chop off the head.
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Old 09-02-2019, 02:53 PM   #113
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Hey man found this blog cause I really loved your SA post in OLD threat. You sound like a kind soul and I was sure the right girl will come into your life when you least expect it.

You probably already do but just to be sure, please check out RSDTyler’s videos. His videos sound like they’re tailor made for guys in your situation. Hell, he’s bald, overweight, and 42 years old but still pulls 20 year old girls like a champ.

Wishing you the best and really cheering for you! Never give up!!!
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Old 09-05-2019, 06:49 AM   #114
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Thanks, Fast. For some reason your post reminded me of something:

I am not a materialistic person. I've never cared about money or possessions, and I think to some extent you have to have that mentality to succeed as a poker player. There are very few possessions or keepsakes that mean anything to me.

One of them was a prayer knot that my grandmother gave to me many years ago. She went on a trip to Eastern Europe in 2004, and being the wonderful grandmother she has always been, she brought back a basket of gifts to give to each of her grandchildren. Since I was the oldest and visiting her at that time, she told me to pick first. I chose an Eastern Orthodox prayer knot that had been crafted by some monks in a monastery. It was black rope, tied into knots, with a golden cross pendant charm that you could wear as a bracelet. The other rubbish in the basket was meaningless, but being the half-pseudo religious person I was at the time, I thought it was the best choice.

Well anyway, I didn't wear the prayer knot that much, but at some point by the following winter, I started to wear it once in awhile. I went to visit my father, brother, and step-mother out of state in Michigan for Spring Break in March 2005, and when I was driving the 5 hour trip home on a Sunday night, my car's exhaust started to malfunction. It was a lemon that I had bought from a used char shyster, the kind of thing a poor kid who grew up in the ghetto might do when he finally had some money. The exhaust burned a hole into the floorboard in the backseat, and unbeknownst to me, I started breathing very high concentrations of lethal carbon monoxide while driving down a barren interstate road in the middle of the night.

What I do remember about those fading moments of lucidity was getting very scared, but not having the cognitive ability to make rational decisions regarding my driving. In my last moments of consciousness, I clutched onto that prayer knot around my wrist, and prayed to God to help me. Then everything went black. I remember trying to apply the brake pedal, but every thought and action was so distant, so far away from me, so removed and slow-motion, it might as well have not happened at all.

Later when I woke up in the ambulance, they took me to the nearest hospital and started shoving breathing tubes in my nose. There is a "crunch" feeling and sound when that happens in the emergency room, that seems alien, but somehow doesn't hurt at all. The doctors and police officer informed me what had happened: I had succumbed to carbon monoxide poisoning while driving at the wheel, and instead of crashing off the road and dying; instead of crashing off the empty road and continuing to breathe CO until I died in the middle of the night; my prayers had been answered-- my car veered off the road precisely onto an exit ramp, precisely into a field next to a Taco Bell at 2:30 a.m., with no traffic around, except for a random newspaper delivery boy, who wasn't supposed to be there at that time. He called 911 and reported my accident, then the dispatch sent an officer who was less than a mile away. He didn't know what happened, but when he found me unresponsive, he broke the window and dragged me out of the car.

Apparently I was moments away from dying. My carboxyhemoglobin levels were off the charts, numbers that indicated certain death or brain damage. I used to be a very bright kid, near genius level, but after the brain damage I consider myself just above average intelligence with kind of a hazy work ethic; nevertheless, it was a very specific and miraculous chain of events that resulted in me surviving the night, and I always credited my last second prayers.

I wore that prayer knot every single day for the next 11 years. At some point, it stretched and barely fit my wrist, and it looked like something a homeless person might wear, and it had absorbed foreign fibers and threads, and I'm sure it had trillions of germs ... but I would have never parted with that bracelet if it was the last thing I ever did. It felt like a religious relic that bestowed invulnerability upon its devoted wearer-- and that wearer was me.





Unfortunately I lost that prayer knot a few years ago in 2016. You'll never guess where I lost it ... Las Vegas, yes that's right. I hate that ****ing city. When I returned back home at the end of the summer, I spent weeks looking through my belongings, over and over again, but to no avail. Finally, I had to accept that I lost it, and spent two days in bed drinking and crying; didn't feel like doing anything else.

Well, I have three other relics that I carry around-- they are all in my Bible, and you can see one in the picture above.


Quote:
Mark,

Better luck next time in the library. I hope you get to the meet the girl.

*Your favorite people

On the other side is a "Hungry? No Waiting! Grab Your Plate & Go!" $1.99 salad buffet advertisement from Ruby Tuesday, where I worked as a waiter in college back in 2002. The U.S. Navy had me go to school for one semester before Ohio State, and I worked as a recruiter in Indianapolis, tutoring kids who could barely pass their screening exams. My other job was waiting tables, and on a particularly hot late summer night, a group of teenage girls sat my table and took turns eating and flirting with me.

Somehow the conversation had veered to an encounter I had the previous semester at my school; I was single, but I met a girl in the library and somehow or another she flaked or it didn't work out. I really don't even remember the story-- but I do remember these girls having a crush on me, and trying to console me, and wishing me good luck and hope, as I prepared to pack up and leave Indiana as an eternally single and lonely man wondering what kind of people I might encounter at Ohio State.

I still have this memento 17 years later, and I started keeping it in my Bible years and years ago, long before these re-emerged feelings about a certain girl. I must have gone through all of my keepsakes and decided these three items meant something special to me that no one else would know. In the case of this crayon message written on the back of a salad bar advertisement and left on my table by customers on that hot summer night ... I guess I was struck by their kindness and empathy.

And somehow I always hoped that yes, maybe one day I would meet the girl.





Fast, your post reminded me of this small keepsake of mine. Like Red, I think hope is maybe a thing stupid people believe in when they can't accept the torturous nature of an eternal reality they can't change. Just since I got here in L.A. I realized this memento was written and given to me just days or weeks before I actually met the girl.

But maybe Andy is right.


Quote:
Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things.
Quote:
And no good thing ever dies.
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Old 09-05-2019, 07:05 AM   #115
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Well written! You definitely see the world differently after a near death experience.

Although my philosophy is a bit different, I try not to keep any memorabilia from my past. Partially because I like to travel light and partially because I am a very sentimental person and easily get lost in my past. At the end of the day, your experiences are what makes you unique.
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Old 09-08-2019, 08:25 PM   #116
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

My ex-girlfriend got engaged. Probably a good occasion to go out and drink tonight.
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Old 09-08-2019, 08:33 PM   #117
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

It's kind of interesting.

Girlfriend #1 breakup, she gets engaged to next guy few months later.

Girlfriend #2 she leaves her boyfriend/fiance and dates me, finds out I'm going to leave the state, disappears on me and winds up getting married to him.

Girlfriend #3 hot crazy type. 36 still single. not capable of a real relationship

Ohio State Girl and I never dated, thinking we are just friends, but she must have felt otherwise and completely blocked me out of her life without explanation. I'm not sure exactly, but based on a conversation with my former roommate, I think she broke up with her HS boyfriend and was finally single around the time I left school, dated someone else, graduated college and married the next guy after that.

Westerville Girl dated one guy in high school after me, then married the next one.

Dentist girlfriend left me for guy she married.

Ex-girlfriend and I break up, and 1 year later she's engaged to the next guy.

I believe they call that the set-up man. No idea what it means but I thought dating was hard.

Time to go get drunk and celebrate the occasion.
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Old 09-09-2019, 03:59 AM   #118
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

I'm honestly happy for the ex-girlfriend. She was still talking to me last year after we broke up, and I could have got her back, but she had started dating this guy and I wasn't 100% sure so I didn't want to interfere. Would have been a huge ***hole thing for me to break them up and then change my mind 6 months later.

But it's bittersweet, because that was my longest relationship and she loved me more than anyone that I cared about and it might have been my last chance. Since they are engaged within a year, seems like I made the right decision, but I definitely need to drink tonight.

Anyway, before my intoxicated shenanigans, I went out on the date (sober) with the second Su Li-zhen. She was cute and very nice, kinda endearing how her English isn't all the way there yet and she mentioned I talk too fast. I tried to start lusting after her, and her top that exposed her shoulders and upper chest, and I admit I was partially successful, but settled for complimenting her on the effort she went to braiding her hair, kissed her hand, offered her a hug, and said goodnight.

I don't see how this can go anywhere, but I will follow up tomorrow and see if there's a second date. At the least, it was nice to treat a college girl on a $100 dinner date when she mentioned that her and her roommates don't even have WiFi.

After that, went back to see the 25 year old bartender I have a crush on, but disappointed. She wasn't there tonight.
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Old 09-10-2019, 08:03 AM   #119
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

No idea why, but I'm thinking about doing a $3k to $300k challenge just because.
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Old 09-10-2019, 08:17 PM   #120
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Quote:
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No idea why, but I'm thinking about doing a $3k to $300k challenge just because.
Stuff like this is the #1 (maybe only) motivator I've ever had to play live cash. Set insanely loose bankroll requirements, like playing any game you have 1000 BBs for, it makes it so the next level is never too far away.
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Old 09-12-2019, 06:05 PM   #121
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

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No idea why, but I'm thinking about doing a $3k to $300k challenge just because.
Best if you have people to race against.
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Old 09-13-2019, 06:16 AM   #122
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

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Best if you have people to race against.
Sounds like we have a new competitor entering the ring!

NLH? PLO? Both?


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Stuff like this is the #1 (maybe only) motivator I've ever had to play live cash. Set insanely loose bankroll requirements, like playing any game you have 1000 BBs for, it makes it so the next level is never too far away.
Yeah I may do that. I'll need to think about it more. Probably I will utilize more aggressive BRM early on since I don't care about reloading, but it would suck to get close and then have to start all over again.
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Old 09-16-2019, 05:17 PM   #123
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

where are you thinking of doing it?
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Old 09-17-2019, 07:00 AM   #124
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

I guess at The Bike or Commerce. No idea which is better but I've seen LATB so maybe there.
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Old 09-17-2019, 07:20 AM   #125
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Re: YOLO -- Las Vegas and Tokyo Story Edition

Looking at couches right now. I really hate shopping for furniture so I considered hiring an interior decorator because I dislike it that much. Especially now everything is done online-- I don't even get to feel or sit on anything before I buy it.


$700-800 Geashill Sofa or Loveseat @ Ashley Home Furniture




$2,785 Bernhardt Sofa @ Neiman Marcus




I'll probably just go with the cheaper option because it's hard to justify spending that much more for an apartment couch that I can't even test in person first.
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