Quote:
Originally Posted by El Diablo
Rasta,
Have you considered getting some psychiatric counseling?
Yes, fairly often; but it was worth getting the sex thing out of the way first to see how it changed things. I could definitely imagine a psychiatrist zooming in on that Green Day-style and me completely agreeing. The fact that I was a 24-year old virgin who honestly thought he might well be physically incapable of sex would have been a massive red herring that likely would have blown us off course.
So yeah; my main problem is a lack of motivation stemming from honestly not knowing what it would take to make me happy, which stems from the fact that there isn't really anything that makes me happy at the moment.
Travel was fun and a wonderfully fulfilling experience but not the sort of thing that I could possibly do long-term. I just value comfort and security too much for it to be an actual lifestyle.
There are just so many things that one
should want that I
don't want. Moving out of my parents' house is one, a car is another (I don't care about learning to drive and honestly wouldn't be fussed if I never owned a car), but these things are things that you're
supposed to want and things that people will disrespect you for not wanting (or at the very least, be very concerned that
other people will disrespect you for not wanting).*
This is the problem with a career. People discourage me from going into teaching or law or whatever because they tell me "Rasta, it just sounds like your thinking about it on a whim, it doesn't sound like this is something you
really want".
And they're right. These are whimsical thoughts. There simply
isn't something that I
really want.
To be honest, I think its quite likely that I suffer from depression and would be diagnosed as such, the problem is that I've led kind of a ****ty life up until now which has led me to believe that I don't suffer from depression but just have an unhappy life that anyone in my position would be finding just as unenjoyable.
Regardless of whether you're trolling or not, I think I may well have to see a psychiatrist.
*In my view, this is particularly applicable with girls. They themselves might not be too fussed that you live at home with your parents and/or don't have a car, but it takes a very strong, independent woman not to be anxious about the fact that a not-insignificant proportion of
other people will perceive their boyfriend as a loser.