Quote:
Originally Posted by Robin Agrees
I am going slowly mad and when I try to explain it to people they do not take me seriously. I went to the doctors, and said I have thoughts of suicide, and she said well everyone has those thoughts, I said I hate working, well everyone has to work.
I tell my friends that I am going mad but they don't care and get drunk at weekends. Its like I have to do something to prove that I am in fact mad. In other words I must not be serious enough, unless I actually do something like suicide or kill somebody else or something then they take action but by that time its to late. so what to do! I drive a little crazy on the roads these days, overtake without looking, speeding, sometimes I drive withe my eyes closed. If I ever do crash I hope I take a lot of others out with me.
not out of hate but out of love, I saved them from having to live out their depressed lives. of course no one will see it that way. but I did them a favour, now ****ing do me one.
I can relate so much to this it's really weird. Except for the part of wanting to take others out. My masochism tends to manifest itself in wanting to help others more than hurt them, even (especially?) the ones who hurt me most.
Your words are art and I'm enjoying your art. You've said somewhere above that you have no talent but I don't believe that's true. I find it helpful to put my words to music and melody, and especially helpful to physically write them down in a book rather than type them out on a keyboard.
As an experiment you might go out and buy a $10 guitar from a pawn shop, download very basic lessons, and sing your words, even if everything is gloriously out of tune.
Peace to you.