Optimistic for an Even-Keeled Future after an Up and Down Past
04-16-2014
, 12:55 PM
04-16-2014
, 01:58 PM
04-17-2014
, 12:28 PM
Weight Management
Growing up I was never one of the “fat kids,” but I always had a little meat on my bones. I was extremely active, mostly with sports, and ate the same crap that most of the kids my age did, only I always found a way to stuff a little extra into my mouth.
Towards the end of high school my waistline suddenly began a minor expansion project, obviously a product of my terrible eating habits finally showing the 1st signs of catching up to me. Upon noticing my pants getting tighter I went on a fool-proof homemade ************ program consisting of no more than 1500 calories per day and running at least an hour per night on my parents’ treadmill while wearing a sweatshirt and sweatpants (this was after days filled with baseball practice, pickup basketball, etc.). I lost 10 pounds and subsequently ditched the diet.
I went to college at a small school a few hours from home on a partial baseball scholarship. There my weight fluctuations continued, I would slowly gain weight over a 4-8 month period and then spend a couple months on a crash diet and exercise regimen until I got back to, or at least close to, what I considered a healthy size.
Upon graduating in 2003 the trend continued into adulthood. Except now the peaks were climbing higher, and the valleys weren’t dipping as low. I was still eating and drinking like a college kid (well a college kid obsessed with food), but without required practices, weight training, and running, my weekly exercise was generally limited to 2 hours of pickup basketball and 1 company softball game.
Despite the reality of my body gradually ballooning, when I stepped on the scale in Dec. 2007, I was nearly blinded by the neon lights flashing 302!
I made what had become my annual New Year’s resolution and lost 20 pounds, unfortunately I stopped there, and by the end of 2008 set a new record tipping the scales at 303.
I made another commitment and became obsessed with seeing the number on our crappy bathroom scale register 2-5 pounds lower every week. Each day consisted of running, weight-lifting, or basketball, and all meals were small and unfulfilling. 6 months later I was down 70 pounds and awfully proud of myself.
That pride faded as I was no longer getting the same “rush” from stepping on the scale, so I rewarded myself by going right back to my old habits and added 40 pounds by the end of 2009.
2010 started off the same with me successfully losing some weight, I then stayed very close to 250 pounds from Feb – Dec, my longest stretch without any significant gains or losses in quite awhile. I’ll discuss in detail in a later installment, but Sep 2010 also saw me take my last drink.
In January 2011 I started experiencing stomach problems (shocker!), and went to several different doctors and specialists trying to figure out what was going on (obviously couldn’t be years of terrible eating habits, drinking binges, and weight fluctuations). During this time I adjusted my diet out of necessity (most things upset my stomach, 3 different times to the extent I wound up in the ER), and consequently got down to around 200 pounds. In June we finally realized I had gallstones, somehow they took 3 CT scans to identify (which became more ridiculous when we later discovered my gallbladder with filled with stones). So they removed my gallbladder and all was to be right with the world. However, they nicked a duct during the procedure resulting in bile leakage that eventually turned into an abscess, which led to a painful 3 week hospital stay.
Upon leaving the hospital I was so happy to be able to eat “normally” again that I celebrated by gaining 30 pounds over the next year, disappointing, but 30 pounds in a full year was actually a much slower rate of increase than what had been my normal. I dealt with some more stomach problems until finally figuring out I simply have IBS and with a few medicines and some diet modification I would be perfectly fine.
That was a little over a year ago, and since then I’ve cut out all beverages other than water (carbonation and caffeine were killers for my insides) and generally limited my intake of processed foods. I’ve felt great since that point, and although I’m still fighting with my weight, it’s on a much smaller scale (excuse the pun), and I haven’t been over 211 since. Quite an accomplishment considering I once topped out at 303. However, I have to continue to remind myself that I could easily climb right back to the top of that mountain if I stop holding myself accountable, so I track everything and try to remember how bad I felt physically, mentally, and emotionally at my peak weight and have made a promise to myself and to my wife to never go down that road again.
That brings us to today, I’m 210 pounds and based on the BMI chart shouldn’t be over 190. I know exactly what I need to do, I just have to do it. I exercise regularly and currently eat a balanced and healthy diet most of the time, I have just been letting my allotted 1 cheat day per week turn into 2 or 2 ½. Losing weight is a simple concept, burn more calories than you consume, if I drop back down to 1 cheat day per week I will run a calorie deficit and should lose ½ - 1 pound per week. I don’t care how long it takes me to get down to 190, I just want to get there and stay there. After beating my head against the wall for many years I’ve realized crash dieting doesn’t work and never will, so I plan to continue eating enough calories to feel full (a hungry stomach leads to bad choices), with most of my meals/snacks consisting of fruits, veggies, lean meats, and limited carbs.
Here’s a chart of my weight fluctuations since 1999:
[IMG]
[/IMG]
Looks like a pretty fun roller coaster right?
Among other things, I’m going to use this blog space to document my daily calorie intake vs calories burned and will post weekly weigh-ins starting next Friday (the 210 weigh-in was this morning).
Hopefully that wasn’t too terribly boring and drawn out, my next background installment will chronicle my battle with alcoholism. I have a busy weekend followed by a long work week, so I probably won’t get it written until sometime in the April 28-30 range.
Growing up I was never one of the “fat kids,” but I always had a little meat on my bones. I was extremely active, mostly with sports, and ate the same crap that most of the kids my age did, only I always found a way to stuff a little extra into my mouth.
Towards the end of high school my waistline suddenly began a minor expansion project, obviously a product of my terrible eating habits finally showing the 1st signs of catching up to me. Upon noticing my pants getting tighter I went on a fool-proof homemade ************ program consisting of no more than 1500 calories per day and running at least an hour per night on my parents’ treadmill while wearing a sweatshirt and sweatpants (this was after days filled with baseball practice, pickup basketball, etc.). I lost 10 pounds and subsequently ditched the diet.
I went to college at a small school a few hours from home on a partial baseball scholarship. There my weight fluctuations continued, I would slowly gain weight over a 4-8 month period and then spend a couple months on a crash diet and exercise regimen until I got back to, or at least close to, what I considered a healthy size.
Upon graduating in 2003 the trend continued into adulthood. Except now the peaks were climbing higher, and the valleys weren’t dipping as low. I was still eating and drinking like a college kid (well a college kid obsessed with food), but without required practices, weight training, and running, my weekly exercise was generally limited to 2 hours of pickup basketball and 1 company softball game.
Despite the reality of my body gradually ballooning, when I stepped on the scale in Dec. 2007, I was nearly blinded by the neon lights flashing 302!
I made what had become my annual New Year’s resolution and lost 20 pounds, unfortunately I stopped there, and by the end of 2008 set a new record tipping the scales at 303.
I made another commitment and became obsessed with seeing the number on our crappy bathroom scale register 2-5 pounds lower every week. Each day consisted of running, weight-lifting, or basketball, and all meals were small and unfulfilling. 6 months later I was down 70 pounds and awfully proud of myself.
That pride faded as I was no longer getting the same “rush” from stepping on the scale, so I rewarded myself by going right back to my old habits and added 40 pounds by the end of 2009.
2010 started off the same with me successfully losing some weight, I then stayed very close to 250 pounds from Feb – Dec, my longest stretch without any significant gains or losses in quite awhile. I’ll discuss in detail in a later installment, but Sep 2010 also saw me take my last drink.
In January 2011 I started experiencing stomach problems (shocker!), and went to several different doctors and specialists trying to figure out what was going on (obviously couldn’t be years of terrible eating habits, drinking binges, and weight fluctuations). During this time I adjusted my diet out of necessity (most things upset my stomach, 3 different times to the extent I wound up in the ER), and consequently got down to around 200 pounds. In June we finally realized I had gallstones, somehow they took 3 CT scans to identify (which became more ridiculous when we later discovered my gallbladder with filled with stones). So they removed my gallbladder and all was to be right with the world. However, they nicked a duct during the procedure resulting in bile leakage that eventually turned into an abscess, which led to a painful 3 week hospital stay.
Upon leaving the hospital I was so happy to be able to eat “normally” again that I celebrated by gaining 30 pounds over the next year, disappointing, but 30 pounds in a full year was actually a much slower rate of increase than what had been my normal. I dealt with some more stomach problems until finally figuring out I simply have IBS and with a few medicines and some diet modification I would be perfectly fine.
That was a little over a year ago, and since then I’ve cut out all beverages other than water (carbonation and caffeine were killers for my insides) and generally limited my intake of processed foods. I’ve felt great since that point, and although I’m still fighting with my weight, it’s on a much smaller scale (excuse the pun), and I haven’t been over 211 since. Quite an accomplishment considering I once topped out at 303. However, I have to continue to remind myself that I could easily climb right back to the top of that mountain if I stop holding myself accountable, so I track everything and try to remember how bad I felt physically, mentally, and emotionally at my peak weight and have made a promise to myself and to my wife to never go down that road again.
That brings us to today, I’m 210 pounds and based on the BMI chart shouldn’t be over 190. I know exactly what I need to do, I just have to do it. I exercise regularly and currently eat a balanced and healthy diet most of the time, I have just been letting my allotted 1 cheat day per week turn into 2 or 2 ½. Losing weight is a simple concept, burn more calories than you consume, if I drop back down to 1 cheat day per week I will run a calorie deficit and should lose ½ - 1 pound per week. I don’t care how long it takes me to get down to 190, I just want to get there and stay there. After beating my head against the wall for many years I’ve realized crash dieting doesn’t work and never will, so I plan to continue eating enough calories to feel full (a hungry stomach leads to bad choices), with most of my meals/snacks consisting of fruits, veggies, lean meats, and limited carbs.
Here’s a chart of my weight fluctuations since 1999:
[IMG]
[/IMG]Looks like a pretty fun roller coaster right?
Among other things, I’m going to use this blog space to document my daily calorie intake vs calories burned and will post weekly weigh-ins starting next Friday (the 210 weigh-in was this morning).
Hopefully that wasn’t too terribly boring and drawn out, my next background installment will chronicle my battle with alcoholism. I have a busy weekend followed by a long work week, so I probably won’t get it written until sometime in the April 28-30 range.
Last edited by scottp4braves; 04-17-2014 at 12:39 PM.
Reason: I suck at photobucket
04-22-2014
, 03:59 PM
04-22-2014
, 06:42 PM
04-22-2014
, 09:44 PM
04-23-2014
, 10:42 AM
04-23-2014
, 10:51 AM
04-24-2014
, 08:08 AM
04-24-2014
, 08:37 AM
04-24-2014
, 04:16 PM
Our Boys:
They look like the sweetest most harmless little things don't they?
Simon definitely fits that description, but unfortunately, Buddy, who we rescued about a year ago and we believe had a rough time of it before that, bit my wife in the face a few weeks ago. He was laying in some blankets (not asleep) and she leaned down and kissed him on top of his head. He immediately whipped around and bit her right on the check. It's was pretty bloody and a couple of the marks were kind of deep. Most of the spots have healed now, but she's going to have a small scars from the 2 deeper ones, which she's obviously not thrilled about.
We're major dog people, her even more so than me, so we haven't considered getting rid of him, but we did decide to hire a trainer. He's coming by next week for a consultation. I want to get help for Buddy so we don't have to be worried about him biting us or even worse anyone else (right now we won't let anyone near him), but I'm sure not excited about the price tag that's going to come with it. But, the trainer has tons of great references, a couple that we know personally, so I'm confident we'll see results, and I'm looking forward to not worrying every time our 11 pound killer doxie is near my wife.
They look like the sweetest most harmless little things don't they?
Simon definitely fits that description, but unfortunately, Buddy, who we rescued about a year ago and we believe had a rough time of it before that, bit my wife in the face a few weeks ago. He was laying in some blankets (not asleep) and she leaned down and kissed him on top of his head. He immediately whipped around and bit her right on the check. It's was pretty bloody and a couple of the marks were kind of deep. Most of the spots have healed now, but she's going to have a small scars from the 2 deeper ones, which she's obviously not thrilled about.
We're major dog people, her even more so than me, so we haven't considered getting rid of him, but we did decide to hire a trainer. He's coming by next week for a consultation. I want to get help for Buddy so we don't have to be worried about him biting us or even worse anyone else (right now we won't let anyone near him), but I'm sure not excited about the price tag that's going to come with it. But, the trainer has tons of great references, a couple that we know personally, so I'm confident we'll see results, and I'm looking forward to not worrying every time our 11 pound killer doxie is near my wife.
04-25-2014
, 12:36 PM
04-25-2014
, 04:15 PM
04-26-2014
, 10:49 PM
04-26-2014
, 10:54 PM
04-28-2014
, 09:26 AM
04-29-2014
, 08:21 AM
04-29-2014
, 11:44 AM
04-29-2014
, 11:52 AM
04-30-2014
, 09:47 AM
How did I get to this point?
June 3rd, 2009
It was a particularly long day at the office and as I often did, I was scheming at the best way to “reward” myself for the hard work. There were 2 certainties, alcohol would be involved, and I wanted to enjoy it without my wife getting upset with me. We had been battling for years about my drinking and I was tired of the fight.
April 11, 2009
The last thing I remember is shoveling finger sandwiches into my gullet upon discovering the caterer was packing it in. It was nearing the end of my buddy’s wedding reception and the liquor had been flowing continuously. Despite being with my wife and plenty of friends; strong drinks, countless celebratory shots, and cup after cup of bud light had been my true companion that night.
The pounding inside my head woke me and I immediately drowned 3 tylenol with a tall glass of water. Snapshots of a blurry night swarmed my mind, but why had I slept on the couch? I walked to the bedroom eager for a hungover breakfast and lazy day on the couch with my wife. Oh crap, the door’s locked, what did I do? I knocked softly and sheepishly whispered “Honey?”
She explained that my thundering snoring was preventing her from falling asleep, every attempt to wake me had failed so she started shaking me. I jumped up yelling obscenities at her and when she engaged in the screaming match I got in her face and kept shouting “Hit me!” It was the 1st time she’d ever been scarred of me. Needless to say, I was beside myself with disappointment.
Logic dictates a simple solution, quit drinking, my wife was right, when I drank I always overdid it, and I could find a million reasons to take that first drink. Unfortunately, logic had no business inside my head when it came to drinking. So I presented a solution that I hoped would satisfy her and allow me to continue my favorite pastime. I would never drink hard liquor again, only beer, and I would never do it to that point of excess.
The guilt of that night curbed my drinking for a while, but I soon grew bored and wanted more. Thus, the idea was born to drink in secret. Now, I just had to figure out how. It had to be liquor, beer was too hard to conceal, and it couldn’t be noticed easily from my breath. I’d never really been a vodka drinker, but I’d always heard it referred to as odorless.
June 3rd, 2009, 6:45
My heart pounded and I could feel the blood rushing through my veins as I pulled up to the drive-thru window. I continuously observed every car and person around hoping not to recognize anyone as I was less than a mile from my workplace. $3.99 for a pint of Heaven Hill vodka and I was on my way.
That night was wonderful, I spent hours in a secret magical drunken haze, I never wanted to leave that place, and I had gotten there without a fight. Inside that amazing corner of my mind I heaped praise on myself and vowed to return there as often as possible.
Oddly enough, I didn’t feel the same way the next morning, the praise had been replaced with regret, guilt, and shame, thankfully, there was an easy cure for those feelings.
June 3rd, 2009
It was a particularly long day at the office and as I often did, I was scheming at the best way to “reward” myself for the hard work. There were 2 certainties, alcohol would be involved, and I wanted to enjoy it without my wife getting upset with me. We had been battling for years about my drinking and I was tired of the fight.
April 11, 2009
The last thing I remember is shoveling finger sandwiches into my gullet upon discovering the caterer was packing it in. It was nearing the end of my buddy’s wedding reception and the liquor had been flowing continuously. Despite being with my wife and plenty of friends; strong drinks, countless celebratory shots, and cup after cup of bud light had been my true companion that night.
The pounding inside my head woke me and I immediately drowned 3 tylenol with a tall glass of water. Snapshots of a blurry night swarmed my mind, but why had I slept on the couch? I walked to the bedroom eager for a hungover breakfast and lazy day on the couch with my wife. Oh crap, the door’s locked, what did I do? I knocked softly and sheepishly whispered “Honey?”
She explained that my thundering snoring was preventing her from falling asleep, every attempt to wake me had failed so she started shaking me. I jumped up yelling obscenities at her and when she engaged in the screaming match I got in her face and kept shouting “Hit me!” It was the 1st time she’d ever been scarred of me. Needless to say, I was beside myself with disappointment.
Logic dictates a simple solution, quit drinking, my wife was right, when I drank I always overdid it, and I could find a million reasons to take that first drink. Unfortunately, logic had no business inside my head when it came to drinking. So I presented a solution that I hoped would satisfy her and allow me to continue my favorite pastime. I would never drink hard liquor again, only beer, and I would never do it to that point of excess.
The guilt of that night curbed my drinking for a while, but I soon grew bored and wanted more. Thus, the idea was born to drink in secret. Now, I just had to figure out how. It had to be liquor, beer was too hard to conceal, and it couldn’t be noticed easily from my breath. I’d never really been a vodka drinker, but I’d always heard it referred to as odorless.
June 3rd, 2009, 6:45
My heart pounded and I could feel the blood rushing through my veins as I pulled up to the drive-thru window. I continuously observed every car and person around hoping not to recognize anyone as I was less than a mile from my workplace. $3.99 for a pint of Heaven Hill vodka and I was on my way.
That night was wonderful, I spent hours in a secret magical drunken haze, I never wanted to leave that place, and I had gotten there without a fight. Inside that amazing corner of my mind I heaped praise on myself and vowed to return there as often as possible.
Oddly enough, I didn’t feel the same way the next morning, the praise had been replaced with regret, guilt, and shame, thankfully, there was an easy cure for those feelings.
Last edited by scottp4braves; 04-30-2014 at 10:02 AM.
04-30-2014
, 06:05 PM
04-30-2014
, 06:44 PM
05-01-2014
, 08:41 AM
05-01-2014
, 08:48 AM
05-01-2014
, 09:20 AM