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Old 12-27-2016, 10:30 AM   #201
krunic
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

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Old 12-27-2016, 12:12 PM   #202
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Old 01-31-2017, 05:35 PM   #203
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

Kitchen Quotes

Quote:
Chef: Peeling garlic all day really takes the fun out of picking your nose after work.
Quote:
Chef: Johnny, I wanna show you this new quail dish
Johnny: ok chef, what is it?
Chef: It's quail and...
Johnny: What's that?
Chef: It's quail
Johnny: What's quail?
Chef: What's quail? This is quail.
Johnny: No I mean like, what kind of bird is it?
Chef: ITS ****ING QUAIL
Quote:
(me to chef, as he was butchering pig heads)
Me: You're really making some headway on those!
Me: Trying to get ahead of the game?
Me: I bet you were at the head of your class in culinary school!
Me: No wonder you're the head chef!
Quote:
Pastry Chef: Krunic you wanna see these heart shaped cakes I'm making for the valentine's day special?
Me: Not really no. That's ****ing gross.
PC: Oh **** you, they're adorable!
Me: I'm gonna take valentines day off.
PC: No you're not.
Me: Yup, I'll be sick that day. Or at least, I'll be sick by the end of the night.
Chef: Krunic, you just hate everything that makes other people happy, don't you?
Me: Wow chef, you really get me.
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Old 05-12-2017, 12:11 AM   #204
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

Quoting my op with updates in bold:

Quote:
Originally Posted by krunic View Post
Stats

Age: 32 34
Height: 5'8"
Weight: 128 lbs 138 lbs
Relationship status: single
Employment status: unemployed employed
Living situation: live with my parents

This will be a place to record my efforts to make my life suck less.

Ongoing goals

- Reduce crippling anxiety and depression, especially social anxiety Done. Still working on it, but it's no longer crippling.
- Eat healthy food (no sugar, no PUFAs, no grains, moar veg) Gotten worse if anything. Working at an italian restaurant and being surrounded by pizza, pasta and gelato all day has not been good for my healthy eating plans.
- Go outside more than 1-2x a week Done. I go out at least 4 days/week.
- Sleep at least 6 hours per night Done. For more, see this: https://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/sh...&postcount=333

Short term goals
- Reduce social anxiety enough to at least get a job Done
- Refrain from violence and hostility towards my family for the remainder of the holiday season Done. In fact, I've been avoiding/ignoring them like a champ ever since.

Long term goals

- Learn spanish
- Learn korean
- Learn tailoring and pattern cutting
- Spend less time watching janky tennis streams and/or staring at live tennis scores Done
- Work on mommy/daddy issues, such as my mother's covert incest and my father's emotional unavailability and raging Done
- Gain muscle mass
Looking back at where I was and where I am, I've made a lot of progress.
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Old 05-12-2017, 12:19 AM   #205
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

Chocolate croissants I made at work

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Old 05-13-2017, 12:24 AM   #206
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

yum!!

Congrats on all your successes - really nice going!!
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Old 05-13-2017, 08:30 PM   #207
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

Sour cherry danish

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Old 05-26-2017, 02:50 AM   #208
spaceman Bryce
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

hi krunic, yeah i bet its not good but if you work at an italian restuarant because youll get a lot of free food?
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Old 05-26-2017, 02:51 AM   #209
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

sour cherry danish is something you'd have to taste , from pic alone hard to tell.
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Old 06-08-2017, 11:53 AM   #210
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

I do indeed eat lots of free food at work.

Sour cherry danish was great. It's all about the flakiness.

Yesterday chef said he thinks I deserve a raise. I'm not sure if he was totally serious or if he was just in a really good mood because we had a new super hot 22 yr old foodrunner. We'll see.
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Old 06-08-2017, 09:51 PM   #211
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

Quote:
Originally Posted by krunic View Post
I do indeed eat lots of free food at work.

Sour cherry danish was great. It's all about the flakiness.

Yesterday chef said he thinks I deserve a raise. I'm not sure if he was totally serious or if he was just in a really good mood because we had a new super hot 22 yr old foodrunner. We'll see.
Hi krunic. I have never worked in the bakery. I am a "dairy manager" by tag. i cant think of what to say right now but i like you a lot and wish you the best. you can have my number if you want. i only text non super close friends that i dont know well, so, you should text me sometime.
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Old 06-10-2017, 08:19 PM   #212
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

Hi Bryce. You can pm me your # if you want and we can be text friends.
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Old 06-10-2017, 08:21 PM   #213
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

Quote:
Originally Posted by krunic View Post
Hi Bryce. You can pm me your # if you want and we can be text friends.
ok if i pm you my number please delete after putting into your phone i dont want every hacker to have my phone number, ok?

edit: no pressure or anything if you dont want to talk to me thats cool. i talk to a lot of people on the phone .

Last edited by spaceman Bryce; 06-10-2017 at 08:40 PM.
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Old 06-10-2017, 08:44 PM   #214
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

I'm thinking of moving out of my parents place. This would be the 2nd time. The first time I moved to Austin TX for about 3 years when I was 22. This was while I was playing poker for a living.

I like my job and the 2 friends I have here, so I think I would stay in Chicago this time.

I hate living with my parents, I can't stand being in the same room with my mom.

Not paying rent and utilities is nice tho. I like to be able to have money to gamble with in the stock market. Paying rent would probly mean I couldn't do that anymore, at least for a while.

I think I could scrape by on my own if I got a cheap studio apartment somewhere. I wouldn't want to have a roommate unless it's someone I already know, and I don't know people.
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Old 06-10-2017, 08:47 PM   #215
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

paying rent sucks and also if you have problems like i do it can be tough i mean you have to get renters insurance and have a liability to keep everything clean and stuff
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Old 06-10-2017, 08:48 PM   #216
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

Quote:
Originally Posted by spaceman Bryce View Post
ok if i pm you my number please delete after putting into your phone i dont want every hacker to have my phone number, ok?

edit: no pressure or anything if you dont want to talk to me thats cool. i talk to a lot of people on the phone .
Will do, go for it. I much prefer texting. Talking on the phone is weird for me. I don't think I've ever talked to any of my friends over the phone.
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Old 06-10-2017, 08:49 PM   #217
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

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Originally Posted by krunic View Post
Will do, go for it. I much prefer texting. Talking on the phone is weird for me. I don't think I've ever talked to any of my friends over the phone.
ok co sign to texting relationship and not phone talking. hold on.
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Old 06-10-2017, 08:50 PM   #218
krunic
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

I like being clean. I only get lazy with cleaning when i'm really depressed, which is fortunately getting less and less often.

Renters insurance? I don't even know what that is. What does that cover?
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Old 06-10-2017, 08:53 PM   #219
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

Quote:
Originally Posted by krunic View Post
I like being clean. I only get lazy with cleaning when i'm really depressed, which is fortunately getting less and less often.

Renters insurance? I don't even know what that is. What does that cover?
its not that big of a deal but its like one of x n8umber of little stupid stuff you have to take care of. my renters insurance is $200 bucks a year. its for apartments basically if theres a fire
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Old 07-11-2017, 05:18 PM   #220
krunic
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

Adventures In Emotional Development, Part 1

I grew up with parents who never taught me basic communication skills or how to recognize and stand up for my own needs and wants. Children who grow up this way become adults who react to conflicts in all 3 non-assertive ways.

There are 4 basic methods of communication:
passive
aggressive
passive-aggressive
assertive

Passive is when you suppress your own needs and wants in order to avoid all conflict. It's being a doormat.

Aggressive is when you intentionally ignore other people's needs and wants and try to intimidate them into being passive.

Passive-aggressive is when you recognize your own needs and wants aren't being met, but are afraid to communicate them honestly, and are afraid to be purely aggressive by beating others into submission.

Assertive is when you recognize your own needs and wants, aren't afraid to communicate them honestly, while being mindful of and caring about other people's needs and wants. This is the only possible approach that can truly resolve a conflict in a way that satisfies everyone.

My parents still to this day (especially my dad) don't know how to be assertive themselves. I've decided not to let that happen to me.

I'm much more in tune with my emotions as a result of going to therapy, reading tons of books, listening to The Mental Illness Happy Hour, etc.

What I try to do is make a mental note every time I get upset or have a strong negative emotion, then explore it later to see if there's a way I can prevent it, make it less severe, or deal with it better in the future.

One thing I've noticed a repeat pattern of is passive-aggressive behavior.

Three things I can identify about passive-aggressive acts:

1. Because there's no direct honest communication, the person you have the conflict with will almost always never know that you are upset or why.

2. The person you have a conflict with will misinterpret your actions, thinking you're just being mean/rude for no reason, or wondering what your problem is, unable to participate in solving the conflict even if they wanted to.

3. The conflict is never resolved, and usually starts additional conflicts when the other person gets mad about your seemingly inexplicable behavior.

It's easy to identify pure passivity (being a doormat) or pure aggression (being an aggro douche). What's more difficult is identifying and eliminating passive-aggression.

When I look back on my passive-aggressive acts, I ask myself:

1. When was the moment I realized there was a conflict and I had to do something about it?

2. What would've been a more assertive way to handle it?

3. What would've been the likely difference in outcome if I had been more assertive?

Being able to act assertively is not easy for people who haven't been taught this from an early age. You need to establish your own boundaries. You need to be able to identify your own emotions. This sounds easy and silly but tons of people have no idea what they're actually feeling at any given time (I didn't until about age 32). Most importantly, you need to convince yourself that it's ok to have needs and wants, and that it's ok to honestly express to other people that you have needs and wants.

Last edited by krunic; 07-11-2017 at 05:23 PM.
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Old Today, 10:10 PM   #221
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Re: krunic tries to suffer less

I enjoyed that last post Krunic, thanks.

Any book recommendations on how to be more assertive?
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