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Old 08-25-2014, 01:13 AM   #676
spaceman Bryce
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

Quote:
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As a side note - in any real way we as a society are far more cruel to animals now than ever.

eek that should be a rage against the machine album cover
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Old 08-25-2014, 01:27 AM   #677
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

Jmakin, I wish i could give you some good advice but i really cant. Im sorry.
Having your friends turn against you shouldnt destroy you I've had different times in my life a lot of friends and then no friends and then a lot of friends again.
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Old 08-26-2014, 02:40 PM   #678
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

I guess it depends on how you define the word "friend." Is it someone you know that you've gotten used to, or someone who has been a support to you in a tough time as you have been to for them?
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Old 09-03-2014, 04:29 AM   #679
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

Alright it's been a few weeks and I have a few stories and updates, but I'm really tired and the last 24 hours have been a whirlwind, so I will relate it to you in a 24-esque hour by hour style -

12:00 AM Sept 2nd - our story begins
I'm doing the last monday night 2am shift of the summer, and it's dead as **** at work. Been sitting around, bored, tired, aimless. A somewhat scantily clad, tall-ish, skinny brunette comes wandering down the dock - right off the bat she seemed strange, but I was intrigued. She pulled the "OMG i'm so scared of boats" thing and was really flirty and handsy right off the bat. She said she didn't have anything to do and didn't know the area so I said she was free to hang out. She hung out for about an hour.

1:00 AM - 2 AM

I couldn't tell if she was drunk or not - I knew she'd probably been drinking, but she also seemed really ****ing weird/kind of crazy so I didn't know how much of it was that. She looked like she was getting bored so I asked her if she wanted to drive the boat. I stood behind her while she drove and she started grinding on my dick a little while we were going across. Then I got a little worried because she started to drift too close to things and wouldn't give me back the wheel and insisted she could land the boat. I was like uhhh no.

A little while later she gives me her number and tells me to text her when i'm off. This is a high point in my night - I'm like, SWEET.

she immediately starts texting me and sending me pics. Here's one of them, to get an idea:




A little 'rexic and trashy, but still a really pretty girl. She had a gorgeous face and cute glasses, which I find attractive. Exactly my type physically.

So, I'm stoked. She seems like she definitely wants to spend the night at my house because she kept complaining about the house she was staying at being "horrible" and how she didn't want to stay there but her photographer was paying her too - which sounded borderline prostitutey to me, but I was like hey, whatever, I'm not a person to judge, technically I have prostituted before.

She had told me earlier she was from vegas and was here for some modeling gig, which I took at face value. She was definitely pretty enough to model but not your typical model type, imo.

2:00 - 3AM
So i get off work and start walking towards where she is. I'm still on the island I work at, which is a small, wealthy, quiet residential community. The area she was, though, was the REALLY wealthy side. Completely private mini-island with a gate and everything. She came out, and I asked her what she wanted to do. She said whatever I wanted to do to her (seriously come on). I was like cool, she mentioned she was hungry, and I said alright, the only thing open is del taco, but unfortunately I don't have my car (it's broken down which I mentioned in the OOT LC thread, if you're interested in that story) so we can uber it wherever we need to go and if you need to get home I can send you back in a cab.

I feel like she didn't really understand the concept of uber because she insisted on driving. But, her sister had taken her keys earlier, and she wanted to go back inside the house she was staying at to find the keys. I knew there was like a snowball's chance in hell she would actually find them, but not wanting to appear creepy, I played along.

I wanted to wait outside but she insisted I come in. She explained that the house belonged to some lady her mom knew (this will come into play later, don't forget it) and that we needed to be quiet so we "wouldn't wake up her photographer" because she had a shoot in the morning and there was no way she would be allowed out, and that she wasn't even allowed to eat (wtf?).

So, she makes a ****load of noise and spends 30 minutes looking for keys I know she's never ever gonna ****ing find. The owner of the house wakes up (I didn't mention, but this house is a ****ing MANSION right on the water, nicest house I've ever been in and I've been in some unbelievable ones) and wants to know what's going on. I tried my best to hide behind the corner but she saw me, and obviously wanted to know who I was, so me and the chick made a hasty exit. So, I order the uber.

3:00 - 4 AM

Uber arrives. Girl ran back to her house to try to find her keys again (seriously come on) and get some alcohol out of the fridge. She came back really quickly and said she couldn't get the booze because everyone had woken up and she didn't want them to tell her she couldn't go out because she wanted to hang out with me.

So, I tell the driver to go to the only fast food place in town that's still open. Coincidentally, the driver is the uncle of a guy I work with and he talked my ****ing ear off half the ride about **** I didn't care about, but he was nice enough. I don't like his nephew at all and could see it runs in the family.

We get to del taco and this ****ing chick has the nerve to order 7 chicken tacos, and a large fries. I just got a sprite. I pay, and tell the driver to take us back to my house. I don't know if you can tell where this is going, but I'll give you a hint, this chick's had like a bazillion chances to say "hey, I don't feel comfortable going back to your house" and told me like 50 times she wanted to hang out.

So we're like a block from my house and she gets all weird and calls some dude and tells him she needs him to come to newport and pick her up. I'm like, wtf. The guy is in Temecula or something ridiculous and that's obviously absurd. We pull up to my house and i'm like "whoa whoa, I thought you wanted to hang out, but if you wanna go, you can just take this cab back to wherever you need to be."

She says "yea i really need to go."

............

Now every indication in the world has said this chick is DTF, she didn't seem drunk to me, obviously wanting a quick lay and I was the guy who was around. She hugged me and said she'd hopefully see me the next day. I had the presence of mind to quip "Do I even get a taco to go?" and took a taco, and got out of the car. I gave a last "really, are you sure?" and she said she really wanted to but couldn't.

Breakdown: here's what I think happened. I don't actually think this chick spent 4 hours to con me for half a dozen tacos. I think she was genuinely DTF and probably a little bit of a whore (sorry if that's misogynistic, but all signs point to yes) but during the car ride was getting a bazillion texts and calls from her obviously concerned mom. I mean her daughter just left at 3 am with some strange dude, wtf.

I am aware of this and realize my chances are going way down. She insisted that it was cool though, despite me asking several times "are you sure, are you sure, are you REALLY sure it's okay you're gone? They seem worried" but no. She stayed the course.

I think what happened is her mom started threatening her and she realized it was kind of dumb what she was doing and bailed. That's fine. I wish that she'd just left me her number for some other night and called it that, but hey, that's the breaks.

I go to bed around 4 frustrated, horny, and hungry because there's no ****ing food in my house since my car's broken and remember going to sleep finally wishing I'd taken more tacos.

4-8 AM - sister's cat wakes me up 400 times wanting food. I don't have food because I have no car and the grocery store is a few miles away.

8- 9:30 AM

Drag my ass out of bed, wondering how in the name of **** I was supposed to deal with today. Grabbed the bike I borrowed from a lady that lives in the front of my house and biked the 3 and a half miles to school. get there by 9:20, class is at 930, which is not as early as I'd hoped given I was groggy, sweaty as ****, and still unshowered from the day before. I wanted to clean up a bit but barely had time to order a coffee and a water from starbucks and head to class.

930 - 12 PM

Thank ****ing god I actually wasn't lost in calculus today. I did have a few moments where I momentarily dozed off and the teacher glared at me for checking my phone a few times, but otherwise was a good class.

12-2:30 PM

OMFG. So, long story short again, I haven't received my financial aid, AGAIN. If you've actually followed this blog for the last year (grats to you, seriously, I don't even read this ****) you'll remember I had an absolute nightmare last year getting the aid I was owed. Well, disbursement day was the 29th, no funds in my ripoff of a student checking account they force you to make with some 3rd party scam of a bank.

So, I gotta spend the few hours I have remaining before work when I could be catching up on valuable sleep spending 2 hours in line with a bunch of brain dead CC students only to be told by a brain dead CC worker that they're taking forever checking my "satisfactory academic progress" and I should receive my disbursement by the 12th. Yea, **** you, I only had to spend 400 dollars on books this week and I have a broken down car, but take your sweet ass time giving me the money you said you'd give me because you're too understaffed and incompetent. **** you.

2:30PM - 4PM

Bike it home as fast as I can. Still a sweaty, disgusting mess, manage to squeeze out a shower and collect my **** before making the 45 minute bike ride to work. I think, all in all, I biked 12 miles today. That's basically a death march for someone who still has bronchitis lungs and hasn't done cardio in 6 months.

4PM-12AM

I'm just gonna do this in one time bloc because I'm tired as ****, and it wasn't that eventful. I was working with the girl I've been ****ing for like almost a year now, and am practically "dating" (even though we're not) which usually kinda sucks for me because she doesn't seem like she enjoys working with me and is always in a pissy mood around me at work. EVERY mother****er I didn't want to see came across that night - including the guy who ****ed around with Melissa while i was with her (my friend who was dating her before i did) and ****ed the girl I'm currently with. Then, some older (trashy but hot, like they usually are) flame of mine showed up out of nowhere and I was terrified the girl I'm with now would think something was going on there. This chick's absolutely crazy and has gone on a miniature meltdown on FB lately that's laced with extremely homophobic and racist rants so I'm keeping my distance from that mess.

Me and the girl I worked with had a talk the other week about our exclusivity, I don't believe she's not sleeping around, but it's irrelevant right now, I decided to trust her and we're definitely exclusive. But, she doesn't want to date me. Not that I don't want to - but her response really tipped me off. It's ****ing bizarre because we actually go on dates but she is weird with affection and we never, ever, EVER do coupley stuff, which is just fine with me. If I had to describe us, I'd say we're really close friends that **** a lot. She's young and pretty hot and honestly I can't do much better so I'm fine with whatever arrangement she wants.

When I asked her if she wanted to be with me in a more official capacity (super dorky way of saying that), she said she didn't know, because she said she thinks she would hurt me. Umm, why? "Well, i'm not really (she actually emphasized it like that) seeing anyone, but I haven't been with anyone else for a long time and things are good let's just leave it at that."

Well, given my experience with Melissa, that's a whole lotta red flags there. I think that instinct is what led to my actions last night - but still it was an obviously scummy thing to do trying to hang out with the crazy LV "model" and I don't feel good about it. Part of me feels like I can trust her, and she's not in any way like melissa, but I didn't think melissa would do her **** too. I don't know.

Oh yea, and remember that mansion/house owner I told you to remember earlier? She CAME ON MY BOAT tonight. And, surprise surprise, she's an old cougar friend of mine. Really nice, attractive lady, I didn't even know she lived in such a nice place. She once invited me to spend the weekend in vegas with her, but I was too young/shy/stupid to take her up on the offer. She kinda thought she saw me in her house that night, but we confirmed it from talking. She filled me in on the situation - there was no photographer, she was letting the chick and her mom stay there as a favor to a friend, when she saw me (a strange man) in the house she told the mom they had to go, so they were kicked out today. I guess I should take some schaedenfreude in that, but I mostly felt bad. I apologized profusely and said I did not mean to intrude her house that night and felt super weird about being there.

She told me the girl I was with was absolutely insane and a total whore and would regularly take off with guys. She's not a model and is nuts. I think I finally met someone that could top Melissa, but ****, part of me is attracted to that, or they're attracted to me, IDK.

So, basically, I'm the most tired I've ever been, I think, have an overwhelming school schedule/work schedule looming ahead of me, have a questionable, vague, undefined relationship with a girl I work with regularly, and am gonna try to finance and buy a new-ish car on Friday. Wish me luck! thank god the antidepressants are working.

Last edited by jmakin; 09-03-2014 at 04:39 AM.
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Old 09-03-2014, 04:33 AM   #680
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

Oh yea, and this chick's still texting me today, and I'm also out of toilet paper. September the 2nd of 2014 will officially be recorded as a cluster ****.

Last edited by jmakin; 09-03-2014 at 04:38 AM.
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Old 09-03-2014, 04:52 AM   #681
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

I remember the owner of the house kept telling me "Thank god she was with you!" and thinking back on it I don't understand it - all indications to her are saying I was trying to **** that chick last night. I've shamelessly flirted with this woman for years. How the **** would she know I'm not some sort of rapist?

I think part of my success and ultimate failure with women is that at my core I'm a considerate guy and women pick up on it and are attracted to it.
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Old 09-03-2014, 04:55 AM   #682
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

Kahn academy is a solid resource for calculus.
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Old 09-03-2014, 04:56 AM   #683
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

Oh my god, rereading this all, I realized I left a lot of **** out about a close friend of mine who I may need to cut out of my life - I'll write about that soon.
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Old 09-03-2014, 10:58 AM   #684
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

It got more real for her when you pulled up to your house

"technically i prostituted myself" - I'm going to make a super serious attempt at reading this blog when i have time now
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Old 09-03-2014, 12:06 PM   #685
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

Quote:
including the guy who ****ed around with Melissa while i was with her (my friend who was dating her before i did) and ****ed the girl I'm currently with.
Is this the same guy who was paying Melissa $50 a pop?
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Old 09-03-2014, 12:19 PM   #686
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

No, that was her previous ex
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Old 09-03-2014, 12:25 PM   #687
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

Oh, OK. That would have totally blown my mind.

I gotta say, reading that last long post your life looks a bit like a sitcom (or soap opera?) where most characters live in this small wealthy island and they know/date/**** each other and bump into each other at your boat, kind of as if it were Monk's cafe.
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Old 09-03-2014, 12:27 PM   #688
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

Not that far off, everyone knows everyone, and the majority of young people in my area go to my college, so there's a lot of overlap.
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Old 09-10-2014, 03:55 AM   #689
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

in case you guys don't read the OOT LC thread I bought a car. 2012 Hyundai Sonata GLS with 32k miles on it for 14.8k. Bluebook suggested a retail of up to 16k, so I think I got a fair deal. good loan considering my credit, affordable payments, very nice looking, sexy car. It's got great pickup for it's price/class - nearly 200HP with a 4 cylinder engine, 6-speed (which I'm really noticing and I like it a lot) 0-60 in 7 point something seconds. 24-32 MPG advertised, so far I'm getting around 25 around town with my AC blasting because it's been 90 degrees with like 80 percent humidity lately (oh yea and I haven't had AC in 3 years, so this alone is amazing) Way nicer than I thought I could afford and I am in love with it.

It's the first thing I've ever worked really hard for and got all on my own. I'm so, so, so glad I spent the summer saving money and paying off my credit cards or I never woulda been able to get this car. The week previous I had been riding my bike everywhere (20 miles a day) in this insane heat because my ford had blown up for the umpteenth time. This combination of events made me say "**** THIS CAR" and i went down to the dealer.


I used to see cars as a tool, a thing to let you go one place to another - but that's because I've always driven pieces of trash I was kind of embarrassed to be in. Now I have a car that people will actually go "wow, nice ride!" I understand the car as a status symbol thing. i feel my confidence has improved and that my world has opened up now that I feel comfortable driving people places. I never, ever, ever let anyone in my old car unless it was absolutely necessary. It was that ****ty and embarrassing.

Anyways I'm stoked about it and thought I'd update here. I could post pics but I'm too tired. I'm proud of myself and hope I can keep it looking as nice as it does today because I'll likely be driving it for the better part of the next decade.

Oh yea and I looked into driving Uber in my off time for some extra $$ and it seems totally doable, might give it a try later in the year.
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Old 09-10-2014, 10:10 PM   #690
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

My motivation in school is struggling lately. I'm doing well, keeping up with my assignments (not as well as I used to, say, a year ago) but damn.

I know what the source of it is. A year ago, I had absolutely nothing. Min wage job, not a lot of prospects, ****ty GF, etc etc you could go on a while about my life.

I've more or less in the last year achieved everything I wanted to. I'm a captain, I have a car that works and that I really like, I have enough money not to stress about it too bad, my health's okay, I'm not in pain all the time, I hook up with decent enough looking women - things don't suck anymore.

I keep reminding myself that even though things are okay for me now, making 34.5k/yr at 30 years old is far less attractive or sustainable than when you're in your mid 20s so I keep pushing forward. I can't possibly progress farther at my company unless I manage (not completely out of the realm of possibility, but the manager only makes 40k/yr). Careers as a captain mostly suck and involve long hours and aren't conducive to having a family/decent retirement. My job is extremely unusual because it has health care, vacation days, and steady hours. Those types of jobs as a captain are like unicorns. Also, there aren't a ton of rich captains out there, even if most of them make pretty good money.

I haven't lost my passion for CS, but it's been diminished heavily because I don't see tangible rewards for a long time down the road and I have to work so ****ing hard to maintain my school schedule with work.

14 units translates to roughly 40 extra hours a week in addition to my work schedule. It is a lot.

Last edited by jmakin; 09-10-2014 at 10:16 PM.
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Old 09-10-2014, 10:11 PM   #691
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

Oh, and I didn't mention to you guys yet - Melissa got fired from her job. She's likely to file bankruptcy this year. Karma?

In the year since we broke up my life has continually got more awesome while hers is in a death spiral.
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Old 09-10-2014, 10:17 PM   #692
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

My biggest fear is becoming complacent at my job, because I actually really like what I do, and I don't wanna get stuck there. i think I'd be miserable in an office setting but that's where I'm likely to end up.

I think the best play, way down the road and if I'm still not sick of it, is to stay part time at my current job if I ever get an office job.
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Old 09-10-2014, 11:10 PM   #693
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

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I haven't lost my passion for CS, but it's been diminished heavily because I don't see tangible rewards for a long time down the road and I have to work so ****ing hard to maintain my school schedule with work.
What do you mean by this? You should only have 2-3 years max left of your degree right? Good marks in CS will get you pretty good salary expectations.

Quote:
Originally Posted by jmakinmecrzy View Post
Oh, and I didn't mention to you guys yet - Melissa got fired from her job. She's likely to file bankruptcy this year. Karma?

In the year since we broke up my life has continually got more awesome while hers is in a death spiral.
Meh, this is just what happens to crazy people who suck at life. Nothing special about it
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Old 09-11-2014, 03:23 AM   #694
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

How does doing computer science fit in with hating office jobs? Though I think a lot of people talk themselves into the idea of hating office jobs without having a decent office job.
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Old 09-11-2014, 11:18 AM   #695
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

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How does doing computer science fit in with hating office jobs? Though I think a lot of people talk themselves into the idea of hating office jobs without having a decent office job.
I don't know a lot of people in that field that are stoked to go to work every day.
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Old 09-11-2014, 11:22 AM   #696
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

That's what I mean - if you think office jobs are going to suck, why are you studying computer science?

I like my job, but then I'm 12 years in a new industry so I get quite a lot of leeway in picking what I want to do.
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Old 09-11-2014, 12:10 PM   #697
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

Because I like it and there's a lot of great opportunities out there for those with a CS major

I hate the humanities and the arts, i don't like any of the other sciences and I don't wanna be an engineer. Doesn't leave a lot else
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Old 09-11-2014, 04:24 PM   #698
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

So after 2 semesters of java, my c++ class is trivially easy so far. Same types of simple programming problems to solve, except you learn the differences between the two languages.

C/C++ is considerably more complex but kind of exciting to crack into. I think I'll probably coast through this class just because I have more programming experience than who this class is designed for. Next semester might be a lot harder, though.

I'm so glad we cracked into higher level programming concepts like generic types, i/o streams, threads, etc. in my last class, because if I was introduced to those in C++, that would be considerably harder to wrap my mind around because this language feels goofy as hell to me.
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Old 09-12-2014, 07:27 AM   #699
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

I'd suggest becoming a yacht captain to some rich tourist you meet on the boat as a career path. Failing that, having a CS degree is one of the best to have for someone who is looking to avoid a 9 to 5 enviornment.

Nice blog, glad you're on an unswing.
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Old 09-13-2014, 01:56 AM   #700
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Re: Jmakinmeangry's debauchery and general idiocy blog

Yea it seems very flexible.

But i'm thoroughly aware a degree is what you make out of it. I know there are a lot of CS majors that are basically worthless.

Good news for me if i'm able to stay near the top of my class, i guess
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