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04-18-2022 , 01:59 PM
Not really much new about D. Still batshit crazy. Her and mom stay up late every night drinking wine.

D. bought a new car only she has no credit so they put it in mom's name. Apparently, they didn't have any money to buy food this week. It is inevitable that all of them end up completely broke. Mom's significant other appears to be planning for the exit. He opened a bank account in his name (unkown to them). Part of the money the two are spending is his.

My wife and I have had several discussions on mom. She'll lose the house and everything in it before too long. Wife is absolutely steadfast that she will not be bailing mom out. We'll see. Sometimes she gets a little soft when it comes to family.
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04-18-2022 , 02:57 PM
you may want to have a heart to heart talk and tell her if she loses it all you will not help with what you have. rightly so as she will just throw what you give down the drain.

get her to put the house in your name so its protected. if she wont then tough luck for her. sometimes you have to take a firm stand and stick to it. or you go down the drain with the wash.

if your wife starts baling them out when will that stop. when you have lost it all?
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04-19-2022 , 11:04 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ray Zee
you may want to have a heart to heart talk and tell her if she loses it all you will not help with what you have. rightly so as she will just throw what you give down the drain.

Impossible to have any sensible conversation with her.

get her to put the house in your name so its protected. if she wont then tough luck for her. sometimes you have to take a firm stand and stick to it. or you go down the drain with the wash.

Possibly down the road we might buy it. But with a ton of conditions. I seriously doubt this ever happens though.

if your wife starts baling them out when will that stop. when you have lost it all?

It will never come even close to that. My wife might send her money occasionally but not even close to hurting us financially. It would be more irritating than anything.
Who knows what the future holds but I'm guessing she'll end up in an assisted living facility somewhere. She'll have to give up her income to do this.
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04-19-2022 , 12:13 PM
A theory of mine is that insanity is contagious. (Strong poker content!) If your wife needs to be in contact with these two, please be there with her.

Also, if Mom needs to go into assisted living, she may need to deed her house to you in order to qualify. Just something to keep in the back your mind as all this unwinds.
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04-19-2022 , 12:52 PM
generally you have to do that two or three years prior to qualify, as you cant transfer assets and then go into a govt, paid center, you have to plan ahead. or they get the house,
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04-19-2022 , 01:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phat Mack
A theory of mine is that insanity is contagious. (Strong poker content!) If your wife needs to be in contact with these two, please be there with her.

Certainly with mom. She's not the brightest bulb to begin with but she's gone off the rails since D. showed up. I'm really not worried about my wife.
She's the only one in her entire family with a good head on her shoulders. But, she does have a softer heart than me so she might help mom out where I wouldn't.


Also, if Mom needs to go into assisted living, she may need to deed her house to you in order to qualify. Just something to keep in the back your mind as all this unwinds.

Hmm....
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04-19-2022 , 01:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ray Zee
generally you have to do that two or three years prior to qualify, as you cant transfer assets and then go into a govt, paid center, you have to plan ahead. or they get the house,
I did not know this. She's taken out multiple loans on this house. My guess is one will foreclose and take the house before anything else happens. There definitely won't be any planning ahead on this. Mom will just lose it all and then be forced to go live somewhere.

But my wife and I have gone through this scenario and my wife acknowledges the fact that this is a distinct possibility.
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04-19-2022 , 03:22 PM
I hope implicit in your analysis is that Mom has to go live somewhere, but it ain't gonna be with you.

There's the old joke about insanity being hereditary--you get it from your kids. Unfortunately seems to be true with D and MIL. Best of luck getting through this.
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04-20-2022 , 11:06 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by golddog
I hope implicit in your analysis is that Mom has to go live somewhere, but it ain't gonna be with you.

Correct

There's the old joke about insanity being hereditary--you get it from your kids. Unfortunately seems to be true with D and MIL. Best of luck getting through this.

D.s brother is equally nuts. However, he figured out quite some time ago that he needed medication to not be so. He sticks to the plan. Even then, he's a handful.
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04-27-2022 , 12:36 PM
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Originally Posted by biggerboat
Also, wassup Yugo! I hope you are doing well.
On paper, great. Mental health wise I've struggled more and more the last two years. Currently (like, today) I'm doing fine.



Quote:
I've had some time to run this around in my mind a bit. I also took another hard look at his numbers as well as investigated typical startup costs for this type of venture.
I had totally forgotten about this!

Quote:
The thesis remains intact. I believe with the right amount of seeding he will be successful. However, realistically it will take twice what I had originally estimated. I'm not comfortable with that at all. This is a non-starter. I could still consider a smaller amount with a smaller piece of the company but even then I'm not sure I want to mess with it at all.
Based on what you've said, I agree this is a very hard "no" unless there is a small amount you can invest that you feel comfortable with. Even then, I would recommend "no" unless you simply think it will be fun to be involved as a silent investor (it almost surely won't be though lol).

Quote:
Originally Posted by biggerboat
My main focus lately has been on my book(s). I have finished the story and have most of the illustrations at least mapped out. I have a few more weeks of getting the page pics in good shape. After that I'll go back and try to refine them some. I'm pretty happy with it so far.

Here is the star of the book - Schmoodle the Poodle

Awww, who's a good boy/girl?
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04-28-2022 , 04:58 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Yugoslavian
On paper, great. Mental health wise I've struggled more and more the last two years. Currently (like, today) I'm doing fine.



Man. Sorry to hear this. It's a constant struggle. Wishing you the absolute best.



Based on what you've said, I agree this is a very hard "no" unless there is a small amount you can invest that you feel comfortable with. Even then, I would recommend "no" unless you simply think it will be fun to be involved as a silent investor (it almost surely won't be though lol).

He found an investor so it's a moot point now.

Awww, who's a good boy/girl?
Schmoodle is a boy. The real dog I am using is actually a girl but for the story it needs to be a boy. Sort of Lassie in reverse.

I had this idea about 10 years ago. I had a friend that was a photographer and he knew a lady with a poodle so we did a photoshoot one day. I sort of gave up on in at the time but I still have all the pics so I thought I'd give it another shot.

The book(s) is pretty much done. I'm in the process of cleaning up illustrations and tweaking some wording. Lots of tedious work but I'm seeing the goal line now.

It will end up being 2 books. I could stretch it to 3 but I think I'll stick with 2. Hopefully I can get it to the printer in a couple of months.
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05-11-2022 , 01:24 PM
Just got back from Washington DC. Wonderful trip. I'll post a tr soon.

Had to share this. I wanted to schedule an appointment with my Dr. for sinus issues. I haven't seen him since before covid. The not so nice woman I talked to on the phone informed me that, since I haven't seen him in 3 years that I would have to fill out new patient forms. Not a problem. Then she told me that since I'm now considered a new patient he won't see me because he's not accepting new patients.

WAT?
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05-11-2022 , 05:33 PM
dc post should be good

Last edited by Ray Zee; 05-11-2022 at 05:39 PM.
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05-11-2022 , 06:51 PM
Yeah, hope you were able to see all the things you wanted to.
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05-12-2022 , 10:39 AM
tr Day 1

We got into DC around 2ish. My sister, who we spent most of the trip with, picked us up at the airport. We actually didn't stay in DC. We stayed in Bethesda.

We didn't really have a game plan for this day so we did some googling and decided to check out the National Cathedral.

The metro has a stop directly beneath the hotel we stayed in so it was really convenient. Our first encounter with the metro system was pretty painless. We all got a card and put some money on them and off we went. The signs were sort of confusing at first but we figured it out. It was actually quite easy. The trains were not crowded much at all except when we got on them later in the day when all the work folks were coming home. Except for a couple of uncomfortable moments (more on this later), all in all a good experience.

The national cathedral was awesome. Just gorgeous. I took a ton of pics but I'm just going to post a few from each day.



Not a good pic but this is the biggest stained glass window in the place. Beautiful.





After a nice meal at Fish Taco, we went back to the hotel and drank.
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05-12-2022 , 11:02 AM
tr D2

Today my wife and I went out on our own. Our goal was to hit the museums. I really wanted to see the air and space museum but it was closed (until summer?). We didn't really have a set game plan other than just browse around. It was raining pretty hard and the forecast was to rain all day so we wanted to be inside as much as possible.

We hit the Starbucks at the hotel on our way out to get a cup of coffee. There was a homeless guy in there carrying on a conversation with himself.

We got our coffee and headed to the train. Just a few minutes later, here comes the homeless guy we saw in the Starbucks. There were about 50 people waiting for the train but he decided to come talk to my wife and I. He wasn't scary or anything but he certainly wasn't able to carry on any semblance of a conversation.

The train came and he wandered down a ways to get on a car. We headed the other way to try to get on another car. Apparently he circled back and got on our car. As soon as the doors closed, he went absolutely berserk. He was yelling and beating on the doors and windows to let him out. He then came right to my wife and I to help him get off the train. This went on until the next stop, where he exited.

We were sitting at the back of the car while the train continued on a few stops. All of the sudden some guy came through the door behind us that connected the train cars. He had on an ankle bracelet and looked scary as ****. He walked a little farther up and proceeded to stare at us. Fortunately the next stop was ours.

We got to the mall and it was raining very hard. There were buses everywhere. Hundreds of them. Most were parked in front of the natural history and american history museums so we decided to head to the african american museum. We stood in line for a bit before someone explained to us that we needed tickets and there weren't any more for the day.

So, we walked to the american history museum in the pouring rain. It was ridiculously crowded. The buses, we found out, were full of junior high kids. They were EVERYWHERE. Thousands of them. Mostly doing what junior high kids do which isn't really looking at museum stuff.

The american history museum was pretty cool but on hindsight probably the least cool thing we saw on the trip. Interesting (to me at least) the most popular exhibit was the inauguration gala dresses of many of the first ladies. The room was packed.

We ended up eating a very expensive lunch at the museum.

My favorite thing...



We then headed to the natural history museum where there were also thousands of junior high students. Other than that, it was really cool. Way cooler than the american history museum.

I really didn't get many pictures there. Most of the really cool stuff like dinosaur skeletons were really hard to capture. That, and it was hard to get any picture without a ton of people in it.



By the afternoon I was getting really tired. I just don't have the stamina any more to walk all day. Getting old.

So, we headed back to the hotel, met my sister, and drank (and ate).
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05-12-2022 , 11:09 AM
tr d3

This day was all about the reason we went in the first place. My niece's graduation ceremony.

It continued to rain the entire time.

Not really much to report. Standard graduation. Started with a drum and bagpipe group which was cool. The commencement speaker was James Brown. Not the godfather of soul, the sportscaster. Fantastic speech.

Then a bunch of not so fantastic speeches followed by the grueling process of each student coming to the podium.

After the ceremony we headed to one of he nearby school buildings. There was food everywhere which was nice. We hung out there for a bit and took some pictures (none of which I have).

We all went back to the hotel. My niece invited a couple of ladies that she considered influential in her life. I knew both of them. And, a family friend that is also a photographer. We also got to meet my niece's new beau. Super nice guy. We approve.

We then had a VERY expensive dinner at the hotel restaurant, in our own private room. It was really nice. We all told some stories about my niece and how proud were were of her.

All in all a pretty good ay.
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05-12-2022 , 11:36 AM
tr d4

My sister had to take everyone back to the airport so my wife and I were on our own again.

We decided to do the monument tour. There were a lot less people out than I expected. The rain had finally stopped but a cold wind came in. We didn't bring any coats but we both layered up pretty well and were fine for the most part.

The monuments are laid out pretty well. Just go in a loop and you can see them all. I've always like the vietnam memorial but they are all pretty cool. There are a couple that I hadn't seen. The FDR memorial is more like a big patio, separated by his different terms. The MLK one was right next to it. And, there was one I knew nothing about. The Korean war memorial. Way cool. There are statues of soldiers as if they were in a rice paddy. And, there is a wall that has faces and such etched into it. Not so much etched as the top stone was sort of blasted away. Very cool effect but hard to describe.

The jefferson memorial is a pretty good hike from the rest of them but we made the trek.

We had a little time to kill and were were both pretty cold so we went over to the National Gallery of Art. It is absolutely stunning. I wish we had had more time to explore it but it was getting late and I was really tired. But we saw quite a bit. The building itself is just beautiful inside.

On the way back to the train we went through the sculpture garden. It was pretty good.

One note. I was talking to a neighbor and he warned me about how bad the homeless problem was at the national mall. Well, it wasn't. I'm not sure what they did, but there were no homeless to be seen.

Then we headed back to the hotel, met my sister, and drank.

Here is me and Frank hanging out.



Absolutely ridiculous statue. Look at the veil. That's marble.



Had to laugh at this at the sculpture garden.

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05-12-2022 , 11:48 AM
tr d5

Spent the day with my sister and niece.

Our first stop was PixelBloom. It was phenomenal. It's hard to describe. You are surrounded by images of flowers. Sort of like being in a kaleidoscope. You feel a little shaky at first because everything is moving.

There are other little rooms with some beautiful digital pictures. And a room where things on the floor follow you around. Really neat.

Pictures won't do this justice at all, but here are a couple.





The wharf was really close, so we walked around that for a bit. Standard boardwalk type waterfront.

We ate lunch at a fantastic greek restaurant called Zorbas and decided we would check out the zoo in the afternoon.

The zoo was great. The weather had warmed up a bit and it was a wonderful walk. It was not crowded at all. I had heard there is a line to see the pandas but we walked right in.

I couldn't get a great shot but here's a pic.



I took a ton of pretty standard zoo pics that I won't post. But we loved this guy.



We stayed until the zoo closed. Then we headed back to eat and drink at the hotel.
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05-12-2022 , 11:52 AM
tr, the end

Said goodbye to my niece and sister and headed to the airport.

Not much else to say. The flight was uneventful.

But I had to post this. LOL.



All in all a very fantastic vacation. We got to see everything we wanted and more.
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05-12-2022 , 12:43 PM
Nice tr, thanks. The Smithsonsian museums are awesome. Too bad Air & Space was closed.

I remember the ruby slippers. Nearby, there was a display with Walt's hazmat suit and Hank's DEA ID from Breaking Bad. Also behind some dividers were Bert & Ernie, and the living room from All In The Family. Great stuff.
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05-12-2022 , 01:27 PM
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Originally Posted by biggerboat
tr d4

Had to laugh at this at the sculpture garden.

There's one of these outside the Aria. I was walking by some kids staring at it and got to explain to them what it was. But first I explained what a typewriter was.
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05-12-2022 , 04:27 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phat Mack
There's one of these outside the Aria. I was walking by some kids staring at it and got to explain to them what it was. But first I explained what a typewriter was.
I would have explained that it is a mock up of a discovered, supposed wheeled vehicle from outer space, perhaps even from a distant galaxy, and that the original is stored in the basement of the Smithsonian. And that it's real purpose is at present unknown.
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05-12-2022 , 05:12 PM
decided to pop in and check out the state of construction and found the thread has long since moved on

wish you the best of luck in your endeavors, have no idea what that sculpture is cause compared to you olds i'm a yut at 39

i found out the hard way that mental health and alcoholism can only fix itself if it really wants to and nothing you do can beyond pointing out your concerns and letting them know there's a problem needing to be addressed - trying to intervene to save the from themselves does nothing more than make it a group problem and will only lead to heartache

i'd schedule an intervention, beyond that it's just pain for everyone unless they agree and willing to do something about it (i've witnessed someone deeply in debt due to manic spending come into 7 figures, she could have easily paid off all debts, lived a lavish lifestyle and still never needed to worry about money again, and a few years later she only had more debt and once again broke) - more money just means bigger ways to dust it off until she's too far in debt in get anymore credit like renting things like a 3rd car she'll never need or in her case an apartment that was 10x the average rental price but at the end of the day still just an apartment to live in temporarily and not even that special

glgl and i miss your hippo avatar, it reminded me of hungry hungry hippos
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05-13-2022 , 07:41 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phat Mack
There's one of these outside the Aria. I was walking by some kids staring at it and got to explain to them what it was. But first I explained what a typewriter was.
I had to look it up. I thought it was some kind of Sonic the Hedgehog thing.
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