Tonight's therapy video

Pissed

Those people in meeting annoyed me tonight.

Pissed that I blew my money on video poker.
Pissed I can't get to damn poker room when I am in a casino.
Pissed I can't trade options anymore since it is considered gambling.

I love poker and trading.
I just got hooked on this ****ing video poker.

I have to reevaluate.
Maybe the Saturday meeting will be better.

I just can't ****ing gamble. Maybe I'll focus my energy on a business plan, my profession, or human relationships.

I don't think I'm going to obsess on attending every meeting.

Some of those people seem sad and weak. Maybe they remind me of myself.

Lonley People

When I walk in a meeting, a casino, or some Christian singles group, that Beatles song is running through my head.

Look at all these lonely people. Where do they all come from.

Seems like life is more pleasant around close friends and family.

The trick is not judge lonely/sad/depressed and depressing people, but instead try to see something interesting in everyone. And that is not on them, that is on you.

Another trick is not to let judgment that is made about you reach your core.

Go to the meetings and try to find there something interesting/enjoyable for you. Every single person there has an interesting side. Try to connect. I mean it is clear, that if this meetings are torture for you, it is not sustainable.

Have you ever wondered what do I find interesting in your blog?

Because you don't trust them. Were you forced to share? If, yes, then I would so run, but I would try to find a place, where you can share and it feels good.

Yes. I agree. I do try to focus on individuals I connect with. I am such a negative person that I tend to make a generalized judgment of the room. That is on me tho.

For me I believe minimal sharing and more listening is appropriate. Everybody is different. The problem I am having is my shares feel like my gambling. They are very compulsive loud and long. Every meeting I have attended I feel like that was good experience until I opened my mouth.

I often wish that I would have kept my mouth shut.

I don't know what is the right way to handle that.

I mean apparently there is something that drives you to express yourself this way. So there is something that needs to get out.

But on the other side, if it makes you feel bad afterwards and feels like gambling when you speak.....

May be that is not a bad point to go into yourself and think about what exactly is happening with you, when sharing. May be the lower brain takes over ..... That is usually connected with this compulsive feeling/loss of control and rarely feels good afterwards. May be it actually feels good to let things out, but you are afraid of judgment. May be it is just emotional ... men generally aren't good at being emotional

I really just don't know what is a good strat in that.

Chipolte Generation

20 people in line. Everybody looking down at cellphones.

Lover959 " ****. I feel sorry for the workers"

Newday "They are not even changing their gloves"

Lover959 "****. I'm starving tho. We are third in line now"

Newday "Thank God Indian dude in front of us reminded them to"

Lover959 "I think we are still going to get sick."

Aloft

Lover959 "I'm running to that boutique hotel to get alcohol to kill Ecoli!"

Newday "**** ... No bartender"

Lover959 "Nobody gives a **** anymore"

Newday "This place used to be kind of nice"

Lover959 "****hole now"

Pool Patio

Drinking bud lights

Lover959 "At Least that little pool is clean"

Addison,TX

Ask for

Thursday's at bar

Lover959 "I always get the boneless wings"

Newday "All you do is drink, eat, and ****"

Lover959 "This my dinner before meeting!"

I don't understand the appeal of boneless wings. First off, they aren't even wings. They are like chicken tenders but with a lot of **** on them. Personally, I'd rather have chicken tenders.

Flying Saucer
Addison, TX


Newday "The payday place closes in 20 min"

Lover959 "I'm not going"

Newday "I know you are trigger happy"

Lover959 "This sucks. I'm jonsen for some poker"

Newday "You blew it. You had a 20k roll for 2/5"

Lover959 "Maybe it's better that way. Those highways are dangerous"

Newday "Oh well. Cool that Tom called and wants you go to meeting tomorrow."

Austin,TX 1995
The Drag - Hole in The Wall



Lover959 "My favorite band"

Ronald "You play poker?"

Lover959 "No ..never been to a casino."

Ronald "How much student loans will you have?"

Lover959 "4K"

Ronald "I don't believe in debt."

Lover959 "I should of gone to medical school"

Ronald "You say that everyday. You live your life in regret and misery" You are going to make killing with your degree."

1000 Miles, 1000 Years

What is your degree? *curious*

Winstar Poker Night

What stakes were you playing? 1/3?

So from the pictures you have won.
Care to post a hand or two? Some table details?

Newday "So what have you learned over this past year?"

Lover959 "I can't make another bet"

Newday "What are you going to do this year?"

Lover959 "I can't make another bet"

Hm.......

What do you want to do? I mean, you know that this "I can't make another bet" doesn't work, if all you want is GAMBOOOOL.

Bank Wire

Mi Cocina
Las Colinas, TX

https://mobile.twitter.com/crazypoke...730753/photo/1

Newday "Why are you eating out everyday?! You have food at home."

In a panic frenzy, sweating, long hair all messed up, greying all over.
Lover959 "Where is that bank wire info!! I got reservations for next weekend?"

Newday "You just reestablished Sunday?!" Tom was there and shook your hand."

Lover959 "The resort pool is opening and they are having Cinco de Mayo party. Maybe I won't gamble!. Everything is free!"

Newday "Bull****"