WrestleMania XXIV
March 30, 2008 - Citrus Bowl, Orlando, FL
- We are finally at the place where it all began. Yes, this is the show that inspired the creation of the
Official WrestleMania Thread. Let's see what everyone was saying about it back then:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dids
That card is ****ing depressing. I haven't watched WWE in like 4 years and there's basically nothing on that card that's new since then save the Divas and maybe ECW.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Russ M.
Yeah this card really sucks. The build up for the matches other than the main event and Flair/HBK have been terrible too.
Quote:
Originally Posted by samjjones
I've had a long-time love/hate relationship with WWE. I'm currently in "hate".
I still watch the big four PPVs each year, but haven't watched a full episode of RAW in about 6 months. I just find the show repetitively boring.
The card this year is absolutely awful. $20M for Mayweather? And you put him with Big Show? How many PPV buys is he going to sell, Vince? I'll hand it to Captain Insano, he's selling his ass off for this, but just a terrible business decision by WWE.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Five-Star
I'm simply tired of the championship being between HHH, Cena, and Orton. Are there no other guys in the business that can be crowned.
Well, I'm psyched.
- Full disclosure: I've never seen any part of this show, aside from a few highlights of Michaels/Flair. The whole Benoit situation burned me out on wrestling for over a year -- I don't really know anything that happened between then and the 2008 draft lottery. I was thinking about watching it, but passed because Floyd Mayweather is a giant piece of **** and I wasn't watching anything he was involved in. Let's see what we've got.
- This is the first open-air Mania since the ill-fated IX, and the first one ever in a stadium this big. The visuals of the stadium are jaw-dropping, and would only get better as the night wore on. We open with a military flyover and a really well-done rendition of America the Beautiful by John Legend. That one goes into the top five. And then Randy Orton gives him an RKO. (Kidding. Legend Killer, get it? Meh.)
Belfast Brawl: Finlay vs. JBL **1/2
JBL is back from retirement after calling the Smackdown matches at Mania last year. I'm not even going to get into the setup for this one, it's not quite Katie Vick-level bad, but it's in the neighbourhood. As hardcore matches go, this was pretty decent, two guys wailing on each other with the usual plunder to get the crowd warmed up.
Money in the Bank: Shelton Benjamin, Carlito, Chris Jericho, Mr. Kennedy, John Morrison, MVP and CM Punk ***1/2
Morrison and MVP are the only debut entrants this year. We talk about how worthless the secondary titles are now, but all three secondary titles are in this match instead of being defended elsewhere at WrestleMania (IC champion Jericho, US champion MVP and co-tag champion Morrison). What a waste. Shelton once again tries to kill himself, being pushed off a ladder and flipping through another ladder on the outside. That one made me cringe. It also made Carlito look down on Benjamin in shock (or maybe "WTF were you thinking?!?") for a good ten seconds in a funny visual. Jericho recycles his Walls of Jericho on top of the ladder spot from Royal Rumble 2001 on Morrison. MVP looks like he's going to win, when from out of the crowd comes Matt Hardy, back from an injury sustained against MVP, to give him a Twist of Fate from the top of the ladder. In the end, Jericho takes out Punk and appears to have it won, when he tangles himself up in the ladder in a rather contrived spot, allowing Punk to grab the briefcase and finally get his shot at the upper card, which people had been clamouring for forever. It's almost impossible to have a bad MitB match, but I didn't think there was a whole lot of continuity to this one, mostly just doing or setting up spots, and there were a lot of instances where someone got to the case but didn't grab it because they were waiting for something else, to the point where it was stretching believability.
Batista vs. Umaga 1/2*
As good as lest year's match was for Batista, this one was bad in equal measure. Lots of sloppy brawling and resting via nerve pinches. In a seven minute match, no less. Crowd didn't care, and in fact were cheering for Umaga by the end. And the funny part was that Batista won "brand supremacy" for SmackDown, yet both guys switched brands in the June draft.
ECW title: Chavo Guerrero (c) vs. Kane DUD
Kane won a dark battle royal to get the shot here. Chokeslam -> pin in 0:10. The match was shorter than it took me to type that. Certainly demonstrated the importance of the ECW brand, and indeed it wouldn't make it to next year's WrestleMania.
Shawn Michaels vs. Ric Flair ****
Flair must retire if he loses. Of course Little Naitch is reffing this one, wouldn't have it any other way. Chopfest to start and the WOOOOs are everywhere. They do two riffs on Flair's top rope spot, one where Shawn goes up and gets slammed off, and one when Flair goes up AND HITS A CROSSBODY! FLAIR WINS IT! FLAIR'S THE CHAMPION OF THE W...oh, sorry. Shawn tries the same springboard moonsault as last year, but Flair moves and Shawn breaks the announce table. That looked like it really hurt. But not enough to try ANOTHER moonsault off the top to the outside a couple of minutes later, holy ****. Shawn sold the hell out of his ribs the rest of the way. Finally Shawn grabs control and goes for Sweet Chin Music...but he just can't do it and stops short, which allows Flair to hook in the figure four. Shawn reverses quickly to break, and then a sad spot where they go for a pin attempt that Shawn is supposed to bridge out of, but Flair just can't make his body lift up. A little embarrassing, honestly. Flair gets a chop block and another figure four that takes Shawn a lot more effort to break. But Flair showboats just a little too much, and HBK hits the superkick for two. Flair gets increasingly more desperate, resorting to a low blow, a thumb to the eye, pulling the tights, all the dirty tricks, but it's not enough as Shawn finally puts him out of his misery with a second superkick, "I'm sorry...I love you", and a final Sweet Chin Music. What a poignant finish. It was totally time for Flair to retire, though, he'd lost more than just a step. Too bad he just couldn't stay away and had to embarrass himself in TNA. The emotion of the match and Shawn's stellar work pushed it over the top as far a four-star match for me.
Playboy Bunnymania lumberjill match: Beth Phoenix & Melina vs. Maria & Ashley DUD
Nothing could follow that, so it's good to see they didn't really try. You really appreciate how far the women have come today when you look back on these Manias where you got a high-profile match just for taking your clothes off in Playboy, and the rest of the Divas apparently weren't useful for anything aside from dancing for the crowd. I love Beth, but this was notable for absolutely nothing except a mid-match power failure.
WWE title, triple threat: Randy Orton (c) vs. John Cena vs. Triple H ***1/4
Orton was kind of an afterthought in this match, the story was focused mainly on the returning HHH, who was out for a year after tearing his quad, and Cena, who forfeited the title in October after going off for surgery, but made a surprise return at the Royal Rumble and won it. One of those two guys was widely expected to walk off with the belt. And he was very much a third wheel in this match, as well. So it was quite the surprise to see Orton retain by punting HHH and pinning a just-Pedigreed Cena for the win, after a hot closing sequence where he was largely absent. They set a good pace and kept the crowd into it all the way through. Cena's two STFs on Orton in this match were horrible even by Cena standards, his arms were really only in the general vicinity of Orton's chin. By contrast, HHH's crossface looked legitimately painful as he was really cranking back on it. HHH would of course win the title next month, because everyone knows you don't do big title changes at the biggest show of the year.
No disqualification: Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather *1/2
I'd forgotten how much mainstream press this got -- the video package shows clips from PTI, Around the Horn, Larry King, Mike & Mike and more. The problem here was that they should've had the easiest story in the world -- big bully vs. plucky little underdog -- but Mayweather is so goddamn unlikeable that it ruins the execution. The match was really strange as a result. I mean, Mayweather took Show down with a rear naked choke and got booed. Funniest part was one of Mayweather's posse yelling, "You can't do that!!" over and over after Big Show does such heinous things as, you know, stepping on him and stuff. Mayweather actually bails on the match -- great underdog move -- but gets dragged back to the ring by Show, and is about to get chokeslammed through the mat when one of the posse comes in with a steel chair. Mayweather grabs the chair and wears Show out with it, then gets a set of brass knuckles and knocks Show out. Let's never speak of this again.
World heavyweight title: Edge (c) vs. Undertaker ****
This one told a really good story, with Edge having studied the Undertaker and staying one step ehad of him throughout the entire match, countering numerous signature Undertaker moves like Old School, the Last Ride, and the tombstone. He just couldn't keep Taker down, though, even after hitting him with everything in his arsenal. It all culminated in a second spear, with Edge finally thinking he'd won, relaxing a bit going into the cover -- and walking straight into the Hell's Gate gogoplata (not called as such yet -- called "that submission move" by the ever-astute Michael Cole, barely a step up from Vince's "whattamaneuver") for the tapout and the title. MVP for the match (and possibly for the whole show) has to go to Charles Robinson, who would've beat Usain Bolt down to ringside to nearly count down Edge following a ref bump and a tombstone.
Overall: 6.5/10
This was well above average in a lot of ways -- certainly visually appealing, technically proficient in the expected spots. But in the end, it was just completely forgettable. There's nothing on this card that I ever need to see again. This gets the lowest grade of any of the "good" WrestleManias.
Ratings so far:
X-7 - 10.0
III - 9.5
XIX - 8.75
XX - 8.75
X - 8.5
XIV - 8.0
23 - 7.5
21 - 7.25
VIII - 7.0
XXIV - 7.0
22 - 6.75
XXIV - 6.5
VII - 6.0
X8 - 5.5
VI - 5.25
V - 5.0
2000 - 5.0
XII - 4.75
I - 4.5
13 - 4.5
XI - 4.0
2 - 3.5
IV - 3.0
IX - 2.5
XV - 2.0