I always thought it was this as well. Almost certainly is.

As a long shot, I sent a tweet to The Lapsed Fan asking them about it. Maybe they will respond

I thought that I may have misheard Heenan when he said it in IX and he actually said Tonto, but going back it's clearly Tano. But now that I think about it, he may have called him Tonto in VIII. If I can, I'll go back and rewatch that match, and maybe relisten to The TLF for VIII and see if they mention it.

He always called him Tonto. He did it relentlessly on RAWs and Superstar tapings as well. Would be pretty easy to find if you can find Tonto's squashes from that time period.

“The Macho/Flair Affair”

And

“Friendship Torn Apart!”

A tagline for each main event, as this one was billed as having two.
They also teased that this could be Hogan’s last match. More on that later.
WrestleMania VIII finds us at the Hoosier Dome in Indianapolis, with an announced attendance of 62,167. That number is nearly four times as many fans as we had last year in not the Los Angeles Coliseum.

Initial Thoughts – I remember this card for having two very good matches on it, at least I think its two very good matches. I know Flair/Macho is way up the list for best WrestleMania matches. Macho was just killing it at this point. Hart/Piper has gotten mixed reviews, with some suggesting people make it out better than it’s supposed to be. One reviewer named Thomas Golianopoulos ranked this match as the 15th greatest match in Mania history and the Flair/Savage match, 19th, which is a bit of a surprise. As far surprised as I can get while reading a random reviewers opinion, anyway.

What really sticks out to me about the Hart/Piper match is that it is literally the only time I can remember Piper being in what amounts to an actual wrestling match, and not a brawl or something gimmicky. That reason alone is one why I think this match gets high on some ATG lists. Either way, I know I have at least two matches I’m super looking forward to. That’s one more match combined I was looking forward two through the first 7 Mania’s.
In dark match action, we missed The Bushwhackers taking out The Beverly Brothers by pinfall. Well, maybe we didn’t miss it per se.

This is Gorilla’s last go as a commentator for us at WrestleMania. He will surely be missed. He is paired here with Bobby Heenan, in what other reviewers have called a GOAT performance.

Last review I thought “America the Beautiful” had become the staple, but here Reba McEntire sings “The Star-Spangled Banner.” 5 Spangled Stars, for her acapella performance. “Boy can Tito’s sister really belt it out…ARRRRREBA McEntire” – Heenan.

“Tito “El Matador” Santana vs. Shawn Michaels w/Sensational Sherri”

Tito is here making his last appearance at WrestleMania, after appearing at all of them to date. Shawn Michaels – having dumped Marty Jannetty (through a window) since WM 7, is now “The Heartbreak Kid,” and on his way to a HOF singles career. Sherri, Heenan’s ,“Pin-up Girl, is looking stunning, per usual.

Tito slaps in a headlock early and HBK slaps the mat, tapping out, this one is over. Oh wait, no it’s not. This was way before the time that a “tap out” became a thing in the world of professional wrestling.

Tito is already doing better in this one then he did against the Mountie last year, where he lost in just over a minute.

Matador has had a headlock on for most of the first three or four minutes of this match. I hope that means that the action will pick up the second half of the match. It’s not Rick Rude vs. Jake Roberts bad, but it’s close. As I say that, HBK throws Tito over the top rope to the canvas. “Air Mexico,” as Bobby said. That woke the crowd up.

HBK lands a backbreaker, in which a fair amount of the crowd cheers for. We are clearly reaching a period where some of the crowd was opening rooting for the bad guys, which seemed unheard of even just one year ago.

HBK lands his crescent kick as Tito came off the ropes, but because it hasn’t been labeled his finishing move yet, he won’t be winning with it. At the time his finisher was a side suplex in which he held one of his opponents knees up. This was seriously such a terrible finisher. I remember laughing at it when I realized that was the finisher he was given in video games on Sega. He went for that maneuver here, but Tito punches out of it.

Matador lands his flying elbow here, sending HBK out of the ring. Tito brings HBK back in, and enters the ring himself with a slingshot shoulder block. After a kneelift and an inverted atomic drop, Tito lands another flying elbow while HBK was getting to his feet. HBK left the ring again. Santana tried to slam HBK back into the ring but HBK held on to the ropes and landed on Matador, getting a somewhat lame 1-2-3. Monsoon tried to act like hanging on the ropes to prevent from being slammed was cheating in some way at first, but then I think he realized that sounded silly and gave HBK his props. I liked it well enough, until the end. 2.25 stars.

In between matches, Gene introduces L.O.D, with Paul Ellering. Ellering expected to get a big pop when he screamed “I HAVE RETURNED,” but nobody in the crowd seemed to know who he was. His hope is to bring focus back to the L.O.D. Unfortunately, he couldn’t turn the clock back 10 years.

“Jake Roberts vs. Undertaker”

This one on personalities alone had great potential. Roberts had locked Taker’s hand in a coffin during a segment of the ‘Funeral Parlor,” and gave the former Percy Pringle a DDT. Roberts was supposedly not allowed to bring his snake to the ring anymore according to President Jack Tunney. Also, his music got the generic music here, though I thought it was his regular music at past Mania’s.

The crowd is enamored with The Undertaker’s entrance, and this is before he had all the bells and whistles.

I was eager to see if Roberts was playing like he was in fear. He seemed a little apprehensive, but also ready to fight. However, as Jake kept laying in the punches and Taker brushing them off, he got a little more apprehensive. Taker does his fly over the ropes but land on his feet bit, and deposits Roberts onto the ground, who had been standing next to the ropes celebrating.

I forgot how slow The Undertaker character moved at this point, especially when he was stalking. A lot of Undertaker’s offense here is a blatant choke hold. They’re playing up that the ref is too intimidated to ask Taker to stop.
Taker goes for a tombstone or a slam, but is reversed into a DDT, which the crowd pops for. Roberts thinks he has this one in the bag, and takes his time getting up. Undertaker does his sit up. Snake goes after him, lands his short arm clothesline, and lands another DDT. Snake is really confident now and goes to chase down Paul Bearer. Taker gets up again, and lands a Tombstone on the steel blue mats. Rolls him back in, 1-2-3. That wasn’t terrible. Two stars. This match makes Jake easily The Taker’s best WrestleMania opponent until we get to Diesel. That’s not necessarily a compliment.

“IC Title – Roddy Piper (c) vs. Bret Hart”

Finally the match that a lot of people seem to see differently, as mentioned in my opening. This match is between two faces, but Piper is leaning towards the heel role with how much he is playing this up as a big brother vs little brother match. He’s pretty hilarious in his backstage interview with Bret, not so subtly making fun of him when he was a kid. Bret eventually takes offense and they end the interview ready to tear each other’s heads off. “Why do it here (rip Bret’s head off) when I can have a million people watch it out there.” – Awesome Piper line.

I remember this easily being the best I’ve ever seen Piper, but to be fair I’ve only seen him in a handful of matches. As a kid watching this I remember being a bit confused, as I had never seen Piper actually try to wrestle. Before viewing the entire thing I think this match will make my top 25 or 30 by the time I finish this thing…if I ever, that is. But, some of that could be nostalgia.

Gorilla expects this to be an all-out brawl while Heenan tells us it will start as a wrestling match and then turn into a slugfest. Heenan was right on this front.

Piper surprises Hart with his wrestling skill early with an arm drag, but in the next exchange Hart gives one of his own. Piper takes offense when Bret gets out of a hold by sending Piper outside the ring. Piper then spits on Bret to show said frustration. After the loogie, we get a test of strength, which I’m guessing is one of the only times either of these wrestlers found themselves in that position.

Bret refuses to let go of Piper’s arm despite Piper hitting him with everything he has. Hart finally releases the hold when Piper sends Hart to the ropes. Hart comes off the ropes with a dropkick, which was pretty awesome, but afterwards he sells a shoulder injury. Piper tells the ref he can call timeout to take a look at him but at the same time Hart jumps up and gets Piper in a small package for a count of two. Someone was playing possum. Piper responds with a huge slap to Hart’s face. This is great stuff.

Hart with a crossbody that eventually sends both guys over the top rope, as intended. Piper gets to the ring first and opens the ropes for Hart to get back in. Hart accepts. Piper does his time out single again to let Hart adjust his knee pad. When Hart is bent over Piper lands an uppercut that Mr. T would be proud of. Piper lands some punches and a bulldog. At this point I notice Hart is bleeding. This is a huge story which I’ll get into later regarding this blade job vs. the Flair/Macho blade job. In short –for now – Bret does a masterful job with his, leading Vince to think it was the hardway. Flair…not so much. It’s clear Bret does the job after the uppercut, but I really can’t tell what he does with the device afterwards. This is usually my forte!

After the bulldog, Piper bites the bleeding cut, slings Hart hard into the corner, and lands a knee lift. Hart gets a surprise 2 count with a sunset flip, but Piper continues the lead, landing a handful of punches. Hart hits Piper with a flying forearm sending Piper to the outside. Piper runs back in and they land a joint clothesline. Pipers head is resting on Hart’s midsection while the ref starts his count. Piper gets to his feet first and heads to the top rope. Bret – playing possum again – gets up, and slams Piper’s face down horizontally from the top turnbuckle. Atomic drop, suplex, and leg sweep gets a two count. Bret then lands a back breaker. While going for the sharpshooter he is met by resistance and lands an elbow instead. Bret goes to the second rope for his patented elbow drop, but is met by a boot from Piper. “I knew it was going to be good, I just didn’t know it would be this good. This is a hell of a match.” – Heenan.

They trade punches from their knees. Ref bump, as Piper throws Hart into the ref. Piper then sends Hart over the top with a clothesline. Outside he slams Hart’s bloody face into the steel steps. He sends Hart back in and Piper grabs the ring bell. Piper stands over Hart menacingly, lifting the bell over his head. Piper has a change of heart and eventually throws the bell out of the ring, Piper gets Hart in a sleeper and Hart kicks off the turnbuckle into a pinning combination for the 1-2-3. The winner “AND NEW” Intercontental champion, Bret Hart. Piper grabs the belt and drapes it over Hart’s shoulder and then helps him off the canvas and put the belt around Hart’s waist. This match is fantastic, the wrestling, the storytelling, everything. 4.25 stars. Easily a top 5 match through the first 7 plus WM’s for me.

Heenan announces Lex Lugar is now a member of the WWF and we go to a recording of him shooting a heel interview. As this continues Lex sells the World Bodybuilding Federation, which was a huge flop.

“Nasty Boys, The Mountie and Repo Man vs. Sgt. Slaughter, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, Virgil, and Big Bossman.”

Then there’s this match. To be fair, independently most of these guys are decent enough hands, but together this looks like a huge mess.
Ray Combs – the second best host of The Family Feud – introduces the particulars. This goes on a while though some of it was pretty funny.
I’ll admit, I’m sort of just waiting for the end of this one and not really paying too much attention. Or I’m just resting my fingers after how much I wrote last match.

In other thoughts, Bobby Heenan could have made a fortune as a comedian. He’s comedic timing is on par with any other comedian I’ve ever heard. He would have been the type that could have insulted the entire crowd, making them laugh their ugly faces off the entire time.

I just saw Boss Man land a d—k punch on Repo Man. That was different. In a move that surprised nobody, the good guys win when the bad guys try to cheat but hit their own guy. .25 stars.

“WWF Championship Ric Flair (c) w/Mr. Perfect vs. Randy Savage

This is awesome, I only had to wait one match for another great one. Other than being a title match, the backdrop of this is Flair tells Savage he has pictures of himself with Miss Elizabeth. I guess Macho didn’t believe Liz when he tells him differently? Wrestling logic.

Ric gives a good promo while Savage is too angry to talk, so we get Gene in front of Macho’s dressing room door.

I suppose there were times late in Flair’s career where every match didn’t seem huge, but he still had that aura about him here. Macho was in quite a hurry to get to the ring.

Macho chases Flair to the aisle before catching up to him. Perfect grabs Macho and takes him all the way back to ringside by his head. Flair takes control briefly before Macho takes out Flair with a clothesline and a knee to the back, which sends the champ into the corner. Heenan is suggesting that the title is less important to Macho than defending Liz’s honor, which is a nice little touch. Heenan also says Savage can’t think straight. Flair regains control by back body dropping Savage high over the top rope and onto the blue mats. Now things slow down to a pace Flair excels at.

Incidentally, Flair won the title by winning the 1992 Royal Rumble, my favorite Royal Rumble. He followed that victory with his “with a tear in my eye” speech, which is probably my favorite promo of all time. While writing all that, Flair is methodically controlling the action, with an array of chops, a suplex and hard Irish whips into the corner.

Macho tumbled outside the ring, where Flair resumes the slow and steady approach to breaking down Macho, including ramming his back into the side of the apron. Flair helps Macho back into the ring with a big suplex. Macho gets a bit of a comeback in when he lands an awkward looking swinging neck breaker. Flair lands a thumb to his eye and heads to the top. Surprisingly, Macho is there to meet Flair, to slam him off the turnbuckle.

Big backdrop, and two clotheslines later, Flair is begging for mercy. Macho responds by sending Flair hard to the turnbuckle. Flair does his bit where he flies over the turnbuckle and lands on the mat, but this time he runs to the other turnbuckle. When he jumps off, Macho greets him with a stiff clothesline and a pin. Two count. The crowd – for the most part – seemed to really think Macho was going to win there. Macho gets up and clotheslines Flair over the top. Macho heads to the top and lands his patented ax-handle which sends Flair flying into the turnbuckle.

Let’s pause here. As mentioned in the Hart-Piper match, they didn’t get in trouble for blading, while Flair lost upwards of 75 percent of his purse for this. Some say that he fined Flair more than he made for this match, which was five figures, as WrestleMania payouts used to be the big payout of the year in WWF. Apparently when he went backstage after this match Vince told him “You always take one step forward and two steps back,” in terms of his tenure at WWF. The story goes that Hart and Piper faked a backstage fight where Bret yelled at Piper for being too rough and busting him open. A story in which Vince believed. Some say Vince knew Bret bladed, but he only used one deep cut which made it look more realistic than the handful of gashes Flair bladed himself with. Either way, Vince was pissed at Ric, to say the least.

With Flair now bleeding, Macho goes to work on him, including a suplex on the outside. Back in the ring Macho works over the cut with fists before heading to the top and landing another double ax-handle. Two count. Bodyslam. Back to the top for an elbow drop, which he lands. Perfect slides in the ring and pulls Macho off, which Earl Hebner misses. Perfect throws a pair of brass knuckles to Flair and Flair wallops Macho. Two count. This is an age where if the crowd saw someone got hit by a finisher or a foreign object they expected it to be over, so this kick out really surprises the crowd.
Flair lands some punches, and then distracts the ref while Perfect hits Savage in the leg while Savage laid prone under the ring ropes.

Here comes Elizabeth. Dave Hebner is trying to keep her from coming to the ring while wearing a suit and comically large white sneakers. Heenan suggests that maybe she’s coming down to be in Flair’s corner and not Macho’s. In the ring, Flair continues to work the leg, setting him up for his figure four, which he locks in in the center of the ring.

Five suits are apparently needed to keep Elizabeth back, including Shane-O-Mac before he was Shane-O-Mac. Flair gets some help from Perfect to add extra leverage to the leg lock. While Macho is turning over the figure four, Flair holds on to the hand of Perfect, which Hebner kicks away. Back on their feet, Macho scoops Flair into a small package. Two count. Flair gets up quickly, while Macho sells the leg injury. Liz lets out a “come on Randy” from the ringside. If there was any thought at all that Liz could possibly be with Flair, that ended that, but I really don’t think it was something anyone believed. In the ring, Flair looks down at Liz and screams “This is for you baby!” and Heenan tells us Liz winked at him. Gorilla tells us that’s a lie.
Flair holds on to Macho’s leg after working it. On his third attempt at landing a punch to Macho’s knee, Macho blocks and rolls Flair up – with a handful of trunks - for the 1-2-3 and his second title reign. I like that even as a good guy Macho still had a few heelish tendencies. In the ring, Liz runs to Macho man and they celebrate in the corner before Flair turns Liz around and starts screaming at Liz and lands a big kiss. Liz responds with slaps and Macho charges out of the corner. Eventually the suits, including the Hebner with the big white sneakers, breaks this thing up, with Flair and Perfect getting the best of it. Flair and Perfect eventually get to the back while Savage sells his leg injury. Finally The Fink tells us Macho is the champ.

I’ll be honest, I thought I would like this more. With that, it’s still easily a top ten WM match so far, and more than likely a top 5-8. There was nothing particularly bad about it, but nothing stood out to me. Still, I give it a solid four stars, making this the only WM to date with two four star matches for me. I think we may have a new leader in the clubhouse for best WM. However, the rest of this card looks meh at best.

Backstage Flair gives a promo that is every bit as good as his “tear in my eye” speech from the RR. I had forgotten about this one. Macho and Flair would continue feuding, but they quietly dropped the Liz angle, and Macho and Liz finalized a divorce a few months after this match.
In between matches, we see how we got to tonight’s main event. In short, Sid is mad he didn’t get a title shot and became a bad guy. After becoming a bad guy, he beat the crap out of a ton of jobbers en route to his match with Hulk Hogan.

Back in the ring, a tribe of Lumbee Indians were dancing in the ring, prior to…

“Tatanka vs. Rick Martel”

The three matches heading into the main event earned a combined -.75 stars from Dave Meltzer. He also gave the main negative two stars. This last hour or should be a real doozy.

Apparently Rick Martel had recently come back to the WWF after taking a hiatus to start his own business. The business apparently did well to the point he is rich from it today. I heard this on a podcast he was being interviewed on, though he never went into any details about what kind of business it is. What he did say was that Vince couldn’t trust him anymore when he came back. He didn’t have too many kind things to stay about this match and his subsequent time in the WWF.

Tatanka is one half of the reason I learned wrestling was scripted due to a match he had with Bam Bam Bigelow. Being I think I’ve mentioned it before, I’ll keep it short. I saw him and Bam Bam have the same exact match at a house show I went to then on TV a few days later.

Tatanka eventually wins this one with a crossbody. Being I paid close to zero attention to this one, I’ll give it one star.

“WWF Tag Team Championship Money Inc.(c) (Ted DiBiase and I.R.S/Bray Wyatt’s dad) w/Jimmy Hart vs. The Natural Disasters”

Both of these tag teams would probably make my top-20 favorite tag team list, had I ever thought about such a list. After watching this match I am pretty embarrassed about that.

I actually thought this was a good use out of Earthquake after his run as a bad guy, and I suppose I feel the same about Ted.

I have a slight memory of Money Inc beating The Natural Disasters for the titles when Ted submitted one of them with a Million Dollar Dream. I was shocked as a kid that a title changed hands with that move, as I didn’t remember Ted beating anyone with that move outside of jobbers.

Earthquake beats up DiBiase with a series of power moves. When IRS tries to help his partner out they both get a series of clotheslines before heading outside to regroup.

IRS wrestling in a tie was always an interesting choice to me, as nearly everyone liked to grab him by it. When I went back and saw some of Mike Rotunda’s early work – thanks to the magic of the WWE Network – I really thought he could have turned into something more. He was in the best match of the night at WrestleMania 1 and I liked some of his NWA matches as a member of The Varsity Club – Kevin Sullivan aside. Either way, solid career.

LOL at a spot where Ted ducks and Typhoon is supposed to fly over the ropes. He doesn’t get nearly enough air, but eventually pushes himself over and onto the floor. Another LOL at me for taking so long to realize this stuff was fake.

DiBiase and Tugphoon land clotheslines on each other. Another spot that looked silly because no one the size of DiBiase should be able to knock Typhoon over with a single clothesline. Earthquake gets a hot tag and not a single damn was given in the crowd. Literally, the volume didn’t rise at all. The crowd is having as hard of time with this as I am.

IRS gets a splash from Typhoon, but he isn’t the legal man so he can’t be pinned. When IRS is about to get an Earthquake Splash, he’s pulled out of the ring by Jimmy Hart. They then proceed to grab the titles and get counted out, or as Gorilla put it “They’ve forfeited the purse money.” I won’t give it a negative two stars like Meltzer, but it’s not good. 1 star. At least The Disasters didn’t celebrate their count out/non-title earning victory.

Gene interviews Beefcake backstage, and Gene mentions Beefcake’s “boating accident.” On one of the first episodes of Monday Night Raw, Beefcake told the crowd the accident happened when he was walking along the beach with his family only to look up in time to see a parasailer flying way too low and kicking him right in the face. In reality, he was helping his friend get ready to parasail and the driver of the boat took off before he was supposed to, sending the friend right into Beefcake’s face. He has over 100 metal plates put into his face as a result of the accident.

"Owen Hart vs. Skinner"

Owen backflips into the ring off the top rope and when he turns around Skinner spits tobacco juice right in his face. At no time in history was The High Energy outfit Hart is wearing here considered cool. Skinner gets about a minute of offense before Owen skins the cat and rolls up Skinner for a surprise pin. Great use out of your only high fliers on the roster. No rating.

The guy who played Skinner occasionally played Doink The Clown. So..there’s that.

“Hulk Hogan vs. Sid Justice w. Harvey Wippleman”

Having watched this somewhat recently, I remember a huge botch that allowed Sid to kick out of Hogan’s patented leg drop, making him one of the only guys to do that during Hogan's initial Hulkamania run.

This match had been billed of sorts as Hogan’s last match. The real reason Hogan took a hiatus following this match is because of the steroid scandal that was blowing up in Vince McMahon’s and Hogan’s faces around this time. Vince thought it would be best if Hogan stayed off TV for a while to allow things to cool off.

Another thing I’ve heard about this match is that fans openly booed Hogan during this match while cheering for Sid. Upon reading that a few months ago I checked it out, and didn’t hear that – or not much of it anyway. Hogan’s pop still seemed pretty big during his ring walk, though it may have been a bit subdued than years passed. I’ll try to listen again for this.

Additionally, the main event for WrestleMania VIII had been originally booked as Ric Flair vs. Hulk Hogan. So much so, that WWF put on a press conference announcing the match. The company line is that house show attendance was down whenever Hogan and Flair had wrestled in the past. It was said that they didn’t mesh well and the matches were trash. Videos of those matches have surfaced – including one on The Network – and they aren’t that bad and could have certainly billed a match around the fact that they were both icons, regardless of how the match went. However, the other story, and most likely true story, is that neither one of them wanted to do the job to each other. Some of the steroid stuff could have changed Vince’s mind about the main event too. I don’t know how well I’m writing it, but this stuff is way more interesting than the actual match, should you want to look into some of it yourself.

Sid attacks Hogan while Hogan’s music is still playing. In fact, it doesn’t stop until Hogan has responded and knocked Sid out of the ring and clotheslined him off the canvas onto the floor. It’s weird the music was still playing during all of this, but I guess he needed the music on to be able to rip his shirt off.

Gorilla tells us “There will never be another Hulkster in this great sport,” playing up the retirement bit. Heenan responds, “Boy, That’s a blessing.”

Hogan gets the upper hand on Sid a number of times which causes Sid to regroup on the outside. Back on the inside, Sid and Hulk engage in a test of strength. I can guess how this is going to go. Hogan in trouble early, then battles back, only to be kicked or something so Sid can gain control. Let’s see how I do…

I was half right. As Sid broke the hold by pushing Hogan to the corner and kicking him in the gut. Sid lands a chokeslam that sends Hogan into – my favorite – The Hogan Shakes! This is an all-time great performance of The Hogan Shakes. While Hogan is on the ground, Sid says some stuff to the camera and plays to the crowd a little bit. He eventually gets back to work, with a kick to the side of Hogan. Hulkster falls to the outside, and Sid hits him with Wippleman’s medical bag. I somehow had missed Wippleman carried a medical bag to the ring. I also have no idea about his entire existence as a manager in the WWF.

Resthold/nerve hold back in the ring by Sid. Things are looking towards a 1-2…Hogan Hulk-up but it does feel a little early. There’s my two count of arm drops and now the Hogan comeback. He gets out of the nerve hold with a series of elbows to Sid’s gut. But Sid quickly reclaims control with a side suplex. Yeah, a little early.

Sid goes for his powerbomb, and somewhat to my surprise he lands it but it’s one of the softest ones I’ve ever seen, as he holds Hogan all the way down to the mat and even lands on his knees before Hogan hits the canvas, deadening the blow even more. Hogan kicks out and begins to Hulk up. Blocks a punch, and lands two of his own, but mixes it up a little by slamming Sid into both turnbuckles before sending him off the ropes and landing his big boot. But Sid doesn’t fall, so Hogan slams him, lands the leg drop and…hilarity ensues.

So, Papa freaking Shango is supposed to come to the ring to break up the pin attempt that gives Hogan the DQ victory. However, he is nowhere to be seen. Yet. Instead, a quick thinking Sid kicks out of the leg drop. Read that line again, “a quick thinking Sid.” Harvey then jumps to the canvas to cause the DQ. Still no Papa Shango. Hogan throws Wiffleman into Sid, who catches him easily. Papa eventually comes down the aisle – probably wondering if he’ll still have a job when he goes back through the curtain – and gets into the ring to beat down Hogan with Sid. I think I followed wrestling close enough back here to wonder how in the blue hell Papa Shango tied in to any of this. The Ultimate Warrior eventually runs to the ring and clotheslines Papa over the top. Sid hits him in the back with a steel chair but before he could deliver a second blow, Hogan strips away the chair from Sid, who clears out quick. In the ring Hogan and Warrior man hug. Going forward, Warrior and Shango would have a feud, but in no way does that explain why he would have ever gotten involved – eventually – in this match in the first place. This was just so bad. No stars.

Final Thoughts – Even as a kid I realized that we were getting close to a turning point in the WWF. Yeah, Hogan would be back soon enough and even win the title at next year’s Mania and of course Warrior coming back, but these were both fairly short lived things. Also, by turning point, I don’t mean that as a good thing. As LKJ’s write ups of Raw and Nitro show, things didn’t exactly get better once some of the old guys left. At least not for quite a while. Until the last few matches of this card, this is way up there. I’m willing to forgive the Tatanka and Own Hart matches, as those were maybe more time constraint things than any. Since I’m willing to forgive them, I’m willing to put this up there near the top.

I’ll admit, I’m getting so far removed from some of these now I can’t remember how much I enjoyed some of these Mania’s. I wish I would have gave them a number grade at least, at the time of viewing, but whatever. I know 8 is much better than nearly everything up until this point.

Show Rankings
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1
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4
2

Great write up. I love the detail. With regards to your last paragraph, I'm in the same boat. I have decided after I finish my next WM which is X, I'm going to re rank them so I'll probably read a couple previous reviews on each to refresh my memory. Maybe then I'll assign a number to each one to allow for easier ranking.

Thanks for the kind words. I've also been thinking of a new way to rank them. One way that comes to mind is ranking in tiers like I've seen someone else do on here. I know 3 and 8 blow away everything else I've seen so far, so that would be it's own, then everything else besides like 4 and 2 (WOAT) would be in the middle.

I have thought about not adding as much detail in attempt to finish this project before WrestleMania 50. Though I think ultimately I like having the detailed writeups to look back on. But 5k plus words is pretty tough to sustain.

Despite writing over 5500 words in the last write up, I forgot to mention a couple things about Sid Eudy aka Sid Vicious, Justice, etc.

Sid is a guy who was close to being a world champion many multiple times but often walked out of both WWF and WCW to pursue his ...softball career. He was going to continue to in main events after WM8, but decided to start missing dates due to his softball career.

Additionally he was going to be given the WCW title at the Starcade Flair ended up beating Vader. However, that was scrapped when Sid stabbed Arn Anderson 20 times with a pair of scissors. Sid was then fired. The build up to the Sid-Vader title match had already started in the form of a months worth of tapings, which had to be scrapped and redone with Flair now the challenger. I'm sorry Arn had to take 20 stabs from scissors, but I'm glad we got Flair vs. Vader as that is one of my favorite matches of all-time, though a lot of it is nostalgia.

Sid somehow managed to win both the WCW and WWF titles two times a piece, despite his best efforts.

Listening to the LF, they said that Sid missed dates because he was refusing to put over Ultimate Warrior in a 92 program.

Definitely a lot of reasons/excuses given for his demise during this particular run. There's rumors he failed a drug test, but that may have been Vince saving face for his reasoning for getting rid of him. It makes sense to think Sid left WWF both to avoid losing to the Warrior and wanting to play softball.

Is it me, or do all Wrestlemania taglines come off as cumbersome, at best.

Initial thoughts – This Wrestlemania is near and dear to me because it is the first PPV I was ever able to get my parents to buy for me. Boy, did I pick a good one as my first, he said sarcastically.

I also remember this because the second the PPV came on, I ran wildly down the hallway with the intention of doing a flying splash on to the couch. Well, I botched my landing spot, overshooting the cushions and slamming my face directly into the wooden ball that made up part of the arm rests of the couch. I remember a stream of tears and blood – from me - and laughter from my siblings, before they saw the blood. Then it was a call to our parents. No stitches were required but my lip grew to the size of my head, and I have a big head, so that’ wasn’t good. I think I finally came back around three hours later when Hulk Hogan won the championship. At 11 years old, I loved this. Nowadays, not so much.

At first I thought I was mistaken about last year’s Mania being Gorilla’s last, as Gorilla welcomes us to this WrestleMania. As it turns out, he was just a host. The commentary team is Bobby Heenan, Randy Savage, and making his WWF debut, Jim Ross. Even as a kid I was surprised to see Ross, as I remembered him as being in WCW.

Being held outside of Caesars Palace in a makeshift stadium, the WWF ran with a roman theme, calling it the “World’s Largest Toga Party.” The announce team, as well as many of the ringside attendants, were in toga’s. So, there’s that.

This was billed as a double main event. The real main event was Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna for the championship and the Hulk Hogan’s ego main event was him and his buddy Beefcake, taking on Money Inc for the tag titles.
In dark match action, we missed Tito Santana defeating Papa Shango. I said last year was Tito’s last appearance, but even if it was dark, it’s WrestleMania, so I’ll call the streak ending at nine. Papa, went from being embarrassingly late to the ring last year to being the first one out this year.

Howard “Finkus Maximus” Fink introduces Cleopatra, Julius Cesar and the announce team. Jim Ross was giving us incredible detail about these proceedings. Poor guy. Heenan came out facing the wrong way on a camel, looking somewhat legitimately scared.

“Intercontenental Championship – (c) Shawn Michaels w/Luna Vachon vs. Tatanka”

This is arguably the best opener in WrestleMania history through the first nine. That all changes next year when a couple guys named Hart have the best WM opener in history, AINEC.

Champ out first. I was getting all jazzed up to see Sensational Sherri, but then he comes to the ring with Luna Vachon. Like Ross, Vachon is also apparently making her debut here.

Ok, here comes Sherri looking zombie like after Tatanka comes to the ring. Apparently HBK and Sherri had broken up somewhere along the line. Tatanka had pinned HBK twice during the build-up to this, a non-title singles match, and a six-man tag.

Fairly slow start, but things pick up fast when Tatanka lands a back body drop and catches HBK in a deep arm drag when he misses a clothesline off the top rope. HBK then does the Flair flip out of the ring and gets hit with a chop when he is walking the apron and sells pretty hilariously on his way to the canvas. Luna came to check on Shawn but Sherri backs her off, which gets a big pop from the crowd.

I’ve heard this isn’t Macho’s best commentary work, and he’s already annoyed the crap out of me fifteen minutes in with saying a version of “Do the thing,” ten times already. I honestly sort of enjoyed Macho as a commentator on the early days of Raw when I have gone back to watch them. He was subtly funny in a way you wouldn’t expect from his character. However, so far, this isn’t good.

Michaels gained control for a minute, but Tatanka regains control after a DDT where HBK sells a shoulder injury, an injury he apparently got in the six-man tag where Tatanka pinned him. Things are a bit slower than I remembered from pervious viewings but that’s because of the shoulder work. HBK has had a few false starts, with one being ended when Tatanka lands a big shoulder breaker. He then goes to the top for a tomahawk chop – because he’s Indian – and lands it. However, a second attempt fails due to a “crescent kick” by Michaels. Had this move been “Sweet Chin Music” this one would have been over, instead here it just gives Michaels control. Tantaka rolls to the outside. Luna goes over to presumably help Shawn out in some way, but Sherri prevents this. When Tatanka gets to his feet, he’s greeted by a clothesline from the apron.

Back in the ring, Shawn gets a two count after both a swinging neck breaker and standing drop kick. Then puts him in a reverse chin lock. After some punches, he gets Tatanka in a modified victory roll – that looked a bit botched – that earned another two count. Back to the turnbuckle, Shawn gets on Tatanka’s shoulders who greets that choice with an electric chair. That seemed like a pretty contrived spot.

Tatanka starts his version of a hulk up after getting an ax handle. He catches a kick and lands four big chops and lands a crossbody from the top, getting a two count, because he’s no Ricky Steamboat. HBK gets slingshotted into the post and rolled up for a two count. Tatanka gets him up for a Samoan drop but HBK counters it into a two count. HBK gets caught into a powerslam from the top rope. The many near falls the last few minutes have been believable. On the outside, HBK attempts a crossbody, but whiffs. When the ref is close to counting HBK out, HBK throws him to the outside.

Once HBK gets into the ring he is met with a Samoan drop, Tatanka’s finisher. However, the ref gently taps Tatanka on the shoulder and calls for the bell. The ref says HBK was counted out. This result both saved Tatanka’s undefeated streak – which I forgot about until they mentioned it – and HBK’s title. I think I enjoyed this match better in other viewings but today I can only go about 2.75 stars.

After the match Luna clotheslines Sherri and slams her on the outside. Sherri had been clapping for Tatanka’s “victory.” Tatanka carries Sherri’s to the back.

“Headshrinkers w/Afa vs. Steiner Brothers”

This is promising. Headshrinkers get all ready in the ring treatment while the Steiner Brothers get a back stage interview (generic) with Gene Mean and full entrance. Let’s see how long until we get a “I’m a Samoan so head-butt’s don’t hurt me” spot.

Scott Steiner is pretty huge here, but nothing close to how big he’ll be in his Big Poppa Pump future. The announcers keep talking about Michigan – The Steiner Bros. alma mater – being in the NCAA tournament. I’m guessing this is the year Chris Webber called a timeout when they had none left.

Headshrinkers throw the brothers out of the ring and then turn around to face Afa who is on the apron for some reason. This gives time for the Steiner’s to head to the top and land clotheslines on the Shrinkers when they finally turn around.

Shrinkers quickly regain control, but things turn when Rick barrels out of the corner with a big clothesline. He then throws Samu into the turnbuckle but he has such velocity he hits the top of the ring post and sells it. So things do hurt their heads.

Interesting spot where I’m not sure what was going on. Looks like Samu is supposed to land a stun gun on Scott, but he tumbles out of the ring because Fatu was using the top rope to get back to the canvas. Upon another couple reviews, it appears this is what they meant to do, but it looks incredibly dangerous. Macho even says he has never seen anything like that in all his years of wrestling. Either way, this puts the Shrinkers firmly in control.

Afa lands a shot with the bamboo stick he carried to ringside on Scott’s back. Fatu lands a backbreaker and then a headbutt off the second rope. The pin gets broken up by Rick. I finally get my head moves don’t hurt me spot when Fatu throws Scott to the ropes and bends down only to have his face/head slammed to the mat. He no sells it, and the Headshrinkers remain in control. Steiners have been taking a beating for a few minutes, including Demolition’s finishing move, which gets a 2 count. Double clotheslines but Scott still doesn’t get the tag. Fatu tells Samu to do some kind of move from the top. I’m guessing he’s about to miss. Yup, misses a headbutt. Which hurts him. So I don’t know what to believe about Samoan’s anymore.

Scotty predictably gets the tag. Sunset flip, slam, clothesline, and a double headbutt…which doesn’t work and makes Rick look incredibly dumb. Shrinkers respond with a double headbutt of their own and a double forward Russian leg sweep (or was it a Yugoslavian leg sweep?). Headshrinkers set Rick up for the doomsday device but he catches Samu in a half powerslam half belly-to-belly suplex, which was a really cool spot, even if it looked like it could have killed Samu if things would have just went a tiny bit awry. Honestly, awesome spot. It gets a two before Fatu realized what happened and kicked Rick to break up the pin.

Rick gets thrown to the outside, but Scott slaps him on the way by, earning the sneaky tag, but he gets clotheslined the second he enters the ring. Scott lands a belly-to-belly on Fatu but turns around into a crescent kick from Samu. Scoop slam by Samu and up again for an Irish Whip into a very poorly executed Frakensteiner for the 1-2-3. Interestingly enough, Heenan says I want to see a replay of that, and they said we don’t need to see a replay. I guess that’s just how bad the final spot was. The last few minutes of this match were very good, despite it being a bit sloppy in spots. 2.5 stars seems about right.

And here is when things go terribly downhill, not that we were that high up the hill to begin with.

“Doink vs. Crush”

We get the background on this followed by a short interview backstage with Doink.

I remember this one guy in elementary school was really big and tall and liked going up behind people and putting them in the Crush Vice (one of the worse finishers of all time). Luckily I was friends with him, but I did feel bad for the other kids he was doing it too.

Doink was actually a pretty good wrestler. He was played by Matt Borne, who I had watched in his WCCW days, when I was maybe seven years old. Doink had a nice trio of matches with Mr. Perfect leading up to one of the King of the Ring tournaments, and a good match with Bret Hart during the Lawler stuff, as well. Yeah, those names gave a lot of people good matches, but Doink could certainly hold his own when asked to do so.

Despite wearing a clown suit, he isn’t the most ridiculous looking person in this match. Crush takes the lead out of the gate, when he chases Doink on the outside of the ring after getting squirted with Doink’s flower. Yup.
In the ring, Doink takes a hard Irish whip into the corner. Crush does the move Macho made famous by snapping the neck on the top rope while jumping to the outside. Macho said “Love it, love it, love it.”

Doink finally takes control on a version of the same move, and lands an ax-handle, stiff clothesline, and another ax-handle, all off the rope. A pretty dangerous looking piledriver follows, as about half of Crush’s head was visible between Doink’s legs on the way down. After landing a powerslam on Crush, Doink heads to the top but gets caught with a boot. Doink remained in control, but only briefly, after getting caught off the second rope for a slam. Doink gets up only to be clotheslined over the top to the outside. Back inside, Crush lands a military press slam, and goes for his Crush vice, but it is quickly broken up when Doink gets his foot in the ropes. The ref takes a bump, Doink leaves the ring, and this is where the “fun” starts.

Crush lands his Crush move again, but a second Doink appears and hits Crush with an arm cast, the same arm cast that had started this feud in the first place. They hit Crush in the head with the cast a few times, and then do there double vision bit. Out of all the things that happened at WrestleMania IX, it was this that the kids were doing in the halls of West Annapolis Elementary the next day. After the bit, they shake the ref – who was apparently dead through all of this – and he gets over to count to three, giving Doink the victory. The crowd was pretty dead for this, but the match itself wasn’t terrible, but it wasn’t really enjoyable either. The match itself gets I don’t know, 1.5 stars. LOL, then I guess they sell the mirror image thing because another ref comes out to look for the extra Doink but can’t find him, so I guess the original result stands.

Todd Pettengill interviews some people in the nosebleeds. I looked up to see what Pettengill does now, and he’s a FM radio jockey. His “personality” makes so much sense now.

“Razor Ramon vs. Bob Backlund”

Here we have two guys making their first appearance in a WrestleMania. Razor, because he was new to the company, but Backlund, because he retired before the first Mania and he’s back now. Backlund goes for a handshake but gets a Ramon toothpick to his chest instead.

This is just an odd pairing of two guys that I guess were just happy to get a WrestleMania payday. Backlund is just so goofy here, thankfully he has a decent enough program with Hart later on, but not a good Mania match. Speaking of going on to bigger and better things, Razor’s is just a year from being in a (close to?) five star classic. WM X has two legit five star candidates, so I just have to keep plugging along here.

Backlund has a tan Sheamus would be proud of. Backlund does a few moves than gets caught in an inside cradle and loses. Guess Razor just decided to pack it in this year. Not very good, but at least it was short. .5 of a star.
After this match, I took about a 2-3 week hiatus on reviewing this, fwiw. I think I need to consider making these about 1/5th the length they are if I ever want to review/watch them all.

“Tag-Team Championship – (c)Money INC vs. Hulk Hogan and Brutus Beefcake aka The Mega Maniacs w/Jimmy Hart

Money Inc. cuts a promo. The main take away from it is that IRS implied that the giant shiner Hogan has came from a sneak attack either provided by, or paid by Money Inc. They had to add it to the storyline somehow because it’s way too obvious to ignore. There are a couple thoughts to how Hogan really got the black eye from hell. His story – IIRC – is that it came from getting hit by a jet ski. He said it had ran out of gas and he got out to push it and then someone else hit him with one. Or, something close to that. The more juicer rumor is that Macho Man had heard that Hogan had been sleeping with Miss Elizabeth and has punched him. Apparently that rumor has some legs, but it makes me wonder why Macho Man wouldn’t have been fired or at least suspended for this show. Anyways, doctors apparently really told Hogan he shouldn’t have wrestled this match because of the damage. It’s that bad. I mean, his actual eyeball is completely black and he has a number of stitches above the eye.

Champs out first followed by the Mega Maniacs to Hogan’s theme music. I recently watched the Monday Night Raw’s heading up to this PPV. Everything led to Team Hogan winning the tag-titles, but as we’ll see later, they sort of went a different way. LOL.

Heenan tells us neither Beefcake nor Hogan have been in the ring for a year. Hogan does look slimmer here, having most laid off the steroids in the past year because of the pressure WWF and Vince were having this time from federal authorities.

Money Inc. takes control early, going to work on Beefcake. IRS tried to punch Beefcake in the face, but Beefcake is wearing a mask due to his own aquatic accident so it hurt his hand. Then Ted does the turnbuckle thing, which of course doesn’t hurt Beefcake. Hogan gets a tag and goes to work on DiBiase with an array of punches and a clothesline. Double boot by the Mega Maniacs.

Money Inc. decide they're going to get counted out and walk towards the back. The Mega Maniacs don’t really seem to care. Fink gets on the mic and tells us the ref has said they will lose their titles if they aren’t back in the ring in ten seconds. Heenan rightfully asks “How do they make the rules up as they go along.”

Hogan back in the ring with Ted. IRS took the tag rope off the turnbuckle, and they take turn choking Hogan with it while Hebner spends his time talking to Beefcake. Ted puts the million dollar dream on Hogan to almost no crowd reaction at all. After a while a small percentage of the crowd realized Hogan is in a bit of trouble, but it sort of takes something out of the inevitable Hogan comeback after his arm goes up and down 2.5 times. To be fair, I’m pretty sure this is how they won the titles from the Natural Disasters.

Hogan regains his feet after the 2.5 arm drops, but slowly loses strength again. IRS distracts the ref, which allows Beefcake time to come in and give Ted a sleeper hold. Both men down in the center of the ring. Hogan sits up at the count of eight. Hogan makes the hot tag to Beefcake. High knee (Hiney is what it would later be called when he and becomes the Booty Man in WCW. True Story), atomic drops, and punches for everyone. When Beefcake goes to land a 4th punch, Ted catches him with the briefcase. Michael Wallstreet back in control. We couldn’t get out of here without Hogan getting his hot tag, of course.

Ted gets Beefcake’s face protector off and they go to work with the punches. Beefcake lands a double clothesline but instead of going for a tag he puts a sleeper hold on IRS. Ted breaks up the sleeper hold but they run into the ref, causing him to go down. Both of the legal men make tags regardless of the ref being out. Hogan lands his punches and a big boot on Ted. IRS comes to the ring to break it up with Beefcake’s mask but Hogan gets a hold of it and wallops both members of Money Inc. Be a star.

I forgot how stupid this next part it. Jimmy Hart comes into the ring and turns his jacket inside out to where it looks a bit like a referee’s shirt, though not a shirt any referee at this WrestleMania is wearing. He then counts 3 and these too Mega Idiots act like they just won the title and about half the crowd thinks so too. A real ref comes down to the ring and tells the Mega Dolts that they are DQ’ed. Then they are about to beat up the real ref but IRS attacks them with the belt, which they no sell. Did we just see a double-turn? No of course not. On a card where we saw an extra Doink, this somehow became the dumbest thing on the card. Unless of course you think the ending of that WrestleMania trumps both, which you might. After IRS leaves, Jimmy Hart throws the ref over the top rope and then the Mega’s pose to the crowd to end the dumbest thing we’ve seen through the first WrestleMania’s. I mean, really. If we don’t want to strap MM, just have them win by DQ or something. How can the crowd possibly like this as much as they did? I’m not saying they all loved it, but way too many of them thought this was an appropriate conclusion to this match. The actual match I was going to give it like a 1.75 but with that ending I’m going to give this a zero. After the match they open the briefcase, which has money in it, and give it away to people in the crowd.

“Mr. Perfect vs. ‘The Narcissist’ Lex Lugar”

The pre-match had a bit of a funny botch with Mr. Perfect attempting to say “The Narcissist, Lex Lugar.” I feel you Curt, I’ve never been able to say that word too well myself.

Lex comes out with scantily clad women holding mirrors for him. While he’s posing some sparklers go off from the top of the mirrors. One review of this show I read said the women Lex comes to the ring with are the best things about this entire event. No argument here.

They said Lex knocked Bret Hart out at a charity breakfast “this morning” before with his forearm, which has metal titanium in it from a real life motorcycle accident. I don’t remember them selling this during the Hart-Yoko main event, so I’ll listen for it (they don’t).

On paper, this one has some potential but I think it ends up being a glorified squash for Lugar, especially after suggesting he’s going to be in a program with Bret (who as of this point through WM).

Perfect’s offense looks as smooth as ever, connecting on a loud fist to the stomach and a high knee that sends Lugar to the outside to regroup. They’re playing up that not only is Lugar undefeated, but he has knocked out everyone one of his opponents with his forearm. Perfect in the meantime is using a spinning toe hold, a move we haven’t seen much since Dory Funk called it a day. Perfect lands a super hard chop that wakes the crowd up. Lugar reverses an Irish whip that causes Perfect to favor the lower back that caused him legit injuries throughout his career. Smart wrestling.

Perfect got a brief minute of offense, throwing Lugar to the corner but then he did a weird spin thing where I’m not sure what he was trying to do Lugar responded with a countermove that I now forget now that I’m editing. Lugar gets a near fall with his feet on the ropes but the ref catches it. Lugar on the offense for a while but its pretty slow going.

Perfect takes control and puts down one of his singlets so we know he means business. Big clothesline by Perfect, that gets a two count. Lateral press, two count. Perfect to the top with a dropkick, count broken up when Lugar gets his foot on the ropes. Lugar reverses a backslide and gets the three count even though Perfect’s feet were on the ropes. While Perfect is questioning the ref about his decision, Lugar lays Perfect out with his forearm. This match was ok. 2 stars.

Perfect gets up and heads to the back to look for Lugar. Lugar is the back talking to HBK and Perfect attacks him but HBK quickly jumps in and beats Perfect with a hard looking trashcan shot and with a broom.

“Undertaker w/ Paul Bearer vs. Giant Gonzalez w/ Harvey Wippleman”

Remember that thing I said about what was the dumbest thing we’ve seen through nine Mania’s? I forgot about Giant Gonzalez’s outfit. The deal with this guy is that he was so physically impressive to look at that both major wrestling organizations had to take a shot on him but the fact that he couldn’t wrestle a lick held him a bit back. Poor Undertaker with another terrible opponent at the biggest show of the year. Eventually they realize Taker can work and put him in with good workers, but my god it took forever.

My initial thoughts of this is that I felt the segment took forever. There’s some matches I’ve reviewed wondering how I have managed to watch them more than once (or twice, upon second showing of this review) but I feel this is a match I’ve sat through 4-5 times.

Undertaker is in trouble after a clothesline and some sort of sleeper hold. Ref checks Calloway’s arm, but only once, as the urn being held up by Paul gave Undertaker the strength to keep his arm up. Undertaker basically throws himself to the outside, though it was meant to be from a toss from GG. GG throws the Taker to the stairs and throws him back in the ring. Taker begins his comeback. The Giant’s selling is hilarious. Harvey throws something to Gonzalez. A Chloroform cloth.

The ref DQ’s Gonzalez.
A bunch of officials come out to an unconscious Undertaker and they bring a gurney out. GG choke slams a referee, while they load Taker up and take him to the back. The crowd starts chanting “Hogan, Hogan, Hogan,” which Heenan recognizes. A few years ago Gonzalez would have surely made a good opponent for Hogan to beat, but neither one of them have much of a career left in the WWF, well this Hogan run, anyway. Taker heads back to the ring and eventually gets the Giant down with a third clothesline.

We get the buildup to Hart vs. Yokozuna, including shots of Yoko squashing a few guys and then attacking Hart during a contract signing on Superstars. Then they talk to Hogan asking his opinion of the match. I should have known right here that something was up. Nowadays it would have been easy, but at 11 years old I still believed in a fair wrestling world.

Hogan talks a little about the Money Inc. stuff and tells Hart to watch out for people stepping over the line. It’s hard to look Hogan directly in the eye during this promo. Before he ends the promo, he says he wants the first shot at either Bret Hart or “That Jap,” Yokozuna. Hogan also promises us that the “WWF Title will stay right here in the WWF and right here in the USA.” Was Yokozuna going to leave the country with the belt? No, just a bit of foreshadowing.

Todd Pettengil tosses a kid out of the way to talk to some younger guys in the crowd who I would bet money are friends of Todd’s.

“WWF Championship (c) Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna w/Mr. Fuji.

Somewhere in my garage is a poster of an independent wrestling show that Yokozuna attended and autographed for me. It was one of his last wrestling related events ever before he died on a tour to the UK. It had been billed he was going to wrestle, but the truth was his health was too far gone for that. So instead he managed a wrestler. During this bit he had some guy talking for him but when another wrestler said that Yokozuna doesn’t have a managing license Yokozuna said “I got your license right here,” while flipping the bird. It was pretty funny but maybe a “you had to be there moment.”

If I recall, this is a pretty decent, but short match. Hart jumps Yoko early, but Yoko just sort of swats him away and deliver’s a shoulder block sending Hart to the outside. Hart catches Yoko’s feet in the ropes and is able to knock him over. Hart jumps directly on Yoko from the canvas over the ropes and lands his elbow from the second. The ref frees Yoko. Yoko gets up and is greeted by two Hart clotheslines. On the third Hart attempt Yoko lands one of his own, which Hart sells awesomely. Yoko follows this up with his gigantic leg drop, which if I recall really hurt Hart’s face.

Things slow down for a bit with Yoko in control, Hart regains control when he caught Yoko with a boot as he came charging into the corner. Hart looks like he’s supposed to land on Yoko’s back, but Yoko falls forward. Yoko lands a big kick, which I assume is a replacement for whatever it is that got messed up when Yoko fell. The crowd starts chanting “USA, USA, USA!” which calls Macho to say it’s a show of respect for Bret. Heenan rightfully points out that “One man is from Canada and the other is from Japan,” billed as, anyway.

Yoko misses another squash attempt and Hart lands a bulldog and gets a two count. Hart then lands a pair of his elbow drops for a two count. Hart then knocks Yoko back down with a clothesline. Hart goes for the ten punch in the corner but Yoko pushes Hart off but Hart had held onto the turnbuckle padding, causing it to break away. Yoko gets a face full of exposed turnbuckle and Hart gets him into a Sharpshooter. Fuji throws salt in Hart’s eyes, giving Yoko a three count. 2.5 Stars.

Hogan comes to the ring to explain to the ref what happened and to check on Bret. Fuji challenges Hogan for the title. Hart is blinder than Frank Lux in Bloodsport but tells Hogan to go for it.

“WWE Championship (c) Yokozuna w/Fuji vs. Hulk Hogan”

Hogan comes into the ring and gets greeted by a kick. Yoko holds Hogan up while Fuji goes for the salt. Hogan ducks and the salt goes into Yoko’s eyes. Hogan lands a big leg drop and that is that. And that, my friends, is how WrestleMania IX ends. Dud.

Final Thoughts – That wasn’t very good. Nothing from the show stands out at all. The best match was the opener of HBK and Tatanka and The Steiners vs. Headshrinkers. Bret should be commended for getting a good match out of Yoko at the end, but it’s not a world beater. Like I said before, my memory is getting a little bad on the early Mania’s but, this one is near the bottom.

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Really good write up. I'm a big fan of these when personal memories are also recalled. It gives that little extra jolt.

I really need to get back to this and finish WM 10, it is just difficult for me to watch on my phone.

Thanks, I'm rapidly approaching a dark period where I won't be able to add any personal memories. Well, I shouldn't say rapidly approaching, as it's taken me 2 years to get through nine. However, it might make me finish some of these faster but it will take some of the fun our for sure.

Thank you, one of my all-time favorite movies around this time.

Frank Dux

Ooops, that's my bad. That one's on me.

I've been in the sidelines with this for a while, but I think it's time to get back into it. Santa brought "my son" an iPad for Christmas so I should be able to start cranking these out again. So without further ado:

WRESTLEMANIA X


This was surprisingly better than I thought it was going to be. I know it had two really good matches, but a couple of the others delivered as well. Well more accurately, there was one other match I really enjoyed(Savage/Crush), and a couple others that exceeded my very low expectations.

With that said, here are my thoughts.

- I think we can all agree that Bret/Owen was and will be in the foreseeable future, the greatest opening match in WM history. Excellent is the only word I can use that does it justice.

- I can't believe someone thought the BamBam/ Luna/Clowns match was a good idea.

- I get the whole idea of having guest celebrities on the show, but Sy Sperling?!?! Sy Sperling? SY ****ing Sperling? Really? Did Vince own stock in his hair company. He is easily in a tie with Herb, the Burger King guy, for worst celebrity to appear. And no I'm not counting that appearance of Bill Clinton.

- As I stated earlier, I really enjoyed the fall count anywhere match. I know you his was still a newer idea, but the rule of having to go back into ring after a pin fall within 60 seconds really put some constraints on this match. But I did really enjoy it.

- The Divas piss break match really applied here. This was anything match and I never really understood the way WWF utilized women's wrestling until the Attitude Era

- The tag division has always been a cyclical one. This was apparently a very down time for it.

- I assume it's getting close to the time Luger goes back to the WCW, but wow what a terrible way to book this match. I'm guessing there were better ways to get heat between Luger and Perfect without doing a ridiculous DQ finish. Just terrible.

- I just want to take a little more time and expand my thoughts on the ladder match. I know I stated in the unpopular opinions thread that I thought this match was vastly overrated. I still believe that, but that doesn't mean I didn't think it was a good match. I actually thought this was a tremendous match, it just didn't meet the standard a lot of people put on it. Now taking into consideration the point that it was the first ladder match on a big stage, bumps it up a notch or two for me, I just feel it isn't in the top tier of all time WM matches.

- I've heard the story about the ladder match going long and Shawn and Razor refusing to "go home" when instructed by the ref. I've also heard that after the match Savage went up to Razor and congratulated him on a great match but them scolded him for being selfish and causing the 10 man tag to get bumped. But I'm really curious how much over their allotted they went. The whole match was less than 19 minutes so I'm finding it hard to imagine they were the only ones to go over. Also it seems Vince found a way to get those 10 a payday since they put the heels on screen arguing, and then the faces came out to cheer with Hart at the end.

- Very good match in the main event, but a couple things bothered me about it. I could have done with a little less Piper as the ref. I know his return was cool, but as the ref I would have liked to see him in the background a bit more. The finish was also a bit off for me. I get the psychology of having Yoko beaten down for a while and then when he lost his balance that was enough to put him out long enough for a pin, but it just felt a bit wonky to me.

AWARDS TIME

Match of the Night

Bret/Owen. Just an excellent match from beginning to end, and is only second to Savage Steamboat from III for overall best match so far.

Worst Match of the Night

A couple contenders but I'll give it to Bam Bam and Luna vs the Doinks. Wow this was a bag of suck.

Worst Use of WWF Money

Actually paying Rhonda Shear and Jennie Garth to appear on the show. I'm sure that having Shear on was a favor to USA Network, but they added nothing to the show whatsoever. I would have given this to Sy Sperling, but I think there is a more than 0% chance Perling actually paid WWF for air time.

Rankings Time

As I stated, I will rerank these now that I am at 10. I was going to give them number or stars rankings but I think to be as accurate as possible I would have to rewarch all 10. That just isn't feasible, so I will just keep some private notes and update after every show. Here we go:

VIII
III
X
VI
V
1
VII
IV
IX
2

I decided to put 8 above 3 because the quality from start to finish was just so much better. I also dropped 7 a lot more after thinking it through again. It was just a sub par show and was the last of the "Lets cram as much **** as possible into these shows" WM era.

Well it's on to Wrestlemania XI. And again as with 7&8, I literally have no idea what is on this card, so who knows what I'm in for.

Never before and never since has WrestleMania felt as small-time as it does at XI.

I've wondered the same thing about how much over Shawn and Razor could have really been. They obviously had inserted that 10-man as a squash, which is at least slightly odd since they already had one other squash in Earthquake/Adam Bomb and we were past the era of a whole ton of two-minute matches.

Wasn't 11 in the timeframe when the E was almost completely bankrupt? Could explain the small time feel (although saying that, the star power is far an away much better than X. You have LT, Salt N Peppa, and the two hottest women on the planet at the time present, so even though the card may make the event seem small time, it's their best use of celebrity talent in a long time)

I don't want to get too ahead of myself here, but I started watching already, and you couldn't be more right. The opening felt like I was watching a Bob Hope variety show or a telethon, and they didn't even mention the main event until the second match

WM XI is the forgotten WM. It's pretty much the only one where nothing historical happens. I've only seen the main event once and that was when it was live, but I loved it. It seemed competitive, real, and unlike most other WWE matches at the time.

Arguably the Rock vs. Cena WM's are the same way (not historical) if you're not into those matches. I think that these WM's are already forgotten because of how bad the matches are.

I wouldn't call Jennie Garth a waste of money in 1994. That was peak 90210 times and that was one of the hottest things in the country. I watched that event so much after taping it live...I couldn't help but always laugh at the teenager (?) that grabs her tit as she walks to the ring. Nowadays, he'd be found, convicted of groping, and raped in prison.

The story goes that Garth was supposed to do some skit, but when she got there and they told her what the skit was, she wouldn't do it.

About the 10 man match. In the Bob Holly Autobiography I'm pretty sure he said that nobody got paid because they went over. Or, if they did it was a tiny percentage of what they would have got had they went on. But, I feel pretty strong in my thought that he said no one got paid.

As far as the book, I can't say it was a great read, but it's interesting getting the view point of a career mid card guy who was around for a long time. Holly seems to be pretty bitter and jaded from his time in wrestling so I times it's sort of a depressing read.

WRESTLEMANIA XI

So I decided to bang this one out quickly since I had some time and the kids were actually behaving for once. I almost wish I hadn't. It's not that it was a bad show, it was just meh. From start to finish there was nothing bad or good, everything was just, meh. If I used a star rating system for matches, all 7 matches would fall in the 1.5-2.5 stars range. Even the venue was bleh. The Hartford Civic Center? Really? I'm guessing this will go down as the worst venue to host a Mania with the exception of the temp arena they built for IX. With that said, let's get to my notes.

- Was there a big Special Olympics promotion going on in the WWF at this time? I don't understand how that fit in with the Anthem.

- What was the deal with the theme music for Luger and Davey Boy? It sounded like a mash up of the U.K. and US anthems performed by Manheim Steamroller.

- The Razor/Jarrett match was the closest match to actually breaking to be a good/great match, but this thing was overbooked and predictable from the very beginning. I knew from the time when Razor and X-Pac came out and attacked Jarrett that this was ending in a DQ.

- Speaking of X-Pac, what was the deal with his robe/gi/kimono thing he was wearing. It reminded me of the drug dealer listening to Night Ranger at the end of Boogie Nights

- 4-0

- I do want to mention the streak real quick. This might have been mentioned by someone else here, but it amazing that there was actually a streak to speak of later on down the line. I mean that from the aspect of how easy it would have been for Vince to give Snuka a win at VII, or have him lose by DQ against someone. Although Vince mentions it here that Taker is undefeated, I doubt that he was thinking that far down the road.

- Did Billy Gunn steal Joe Dirt's wig for the show? That was some bad hair, and only Todd Pettingil's mullet comes close to besting it.

- With the exception of WM 1, this was the best use of the celebrities. Although I'm a bit perplexed as to why they had a MLB ump as a guest referee. I don't think there was a work stoppage in baseball, and the season should have been starting the next day, so I have no idea.

- Can they stop calling them " I Quit" matches, since nobody ever actually says " I Quit" . They either scream something unrecognizable, or they pass out.

- I forgot how smoking hot Jenny McCarthy was back then, but now I can't look at her without thinking about her bad science anti vaccine stances.

- The main event was actually not as bad as I thought it was going to be. It was obvious that LT was very limited in what he could do, but he pulled it off. Of course the bulk of the credit should go to Bam Bam because he made LT look as good as possible. I also am wondering why this match went last instead of the Championship match.

- I think we discussed this in another thread when someone linked something from this show, but as having that many photographers that close to ringside necessary? That was just a catastrophe waiting to happen, and I thought Michaels got legit injured when he was tossed to the floor once.

AWARDS TIME

I'm not going to give a best or worst match of the night since they were all basically about the same

Most Valuable Performer

Nikolai Volkoff's toupee. Wow was that a sweet piece on top of Nikolai's head! Was this ever brought up by anyone on RAW leading up to this, or were they actually trying to put that thing over. Not a good look.

Least Valuable Performer

Vince McMahon. I never realized how bad he was as an announcer until I started doing this. I think it was magnified even more seeing Jim Ross relegated to the WWF equivalent of an NBA sideline reporter.

Rankings

This one goes near the bottom, but I don't think it is the worst.

VIII
III
X
VI
V
1
VII
IV
XI
IX
2

Now it's time to move on to Manias that I have seen before. Of course I have only seen them once and it was when they aired live so I'm sure there is a ton I have forgotten.