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Old 12-08-2005, 06:05 PM   #1
Patrick Ewing
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Poker Rivals at Dinner

El Diablo: Welcome everyone
to the two plus two dinner
I am very rich

bicyclekick: Hi Sucker, hi Tommy.

JA Sucker: Raising small pairs under the gun in aggressive mid limit games is the sign of a homosexual and it's not close.

Tommy: bk, if you insist on playing these marginal hands, you must become one with the hand, and one with the table.

Dcifrths: The play was expert, imo. Quick EV calcs is all it takes really. I calculated the probability of me working at a NYC firm next year, added the probability of me bragging about it on 2+2, subtracted the % of the time that El Diablo completely owns me in public, and this number is your BB/hand of the PF raise. - Barron

El Diablo: Hi Barron: "LOL."

Ray Zee: This reminds me of the squirrels in the woods behind-

Schneids: Jesus Christ, shut the [censored] up you old quack. OK, I was playing the 300/600 Interpoker game with Lagerborg. Actually, let me give you this biography that I wrote about Lagerborg.

stoxtrader: http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v4...0kinamonth.jpg

El Diablo: Thanks, stox. Based on this I'm convinced you're just running hot and will eventually spiral into a hole of misery, depression, and poverty.

James282: I play very high.

bicyclekick: Okay, I have another hand to talk about here. This one's pretty interesting. 4000/8000 Bellagio. I'm running well and I think I'm +EV in the game. My image is of a person that is running well but -EV in the game, FWIW. Full table. Anyway, I get A2o UTG. Now, normally this is a routine muck, but, you know what, I'm on [censored] tilt. I raise it.

Ray Zee: All the best players in the biggest games used this move in the 1840s. Now some of them are making money, and others are writing books nobody reads about hi-lo split. You do the math.

El Diablo: BK, you are the only type of player I would ever physically assault at the poker table. I would actually beat you like my garden slaves for raising that [censored] UTG.

Tommy: The ace of grace, the shoelace, and the mace, the race, and the taste, and I like saying a lot of words that don't mean anything.

bicyclekick: Here's my reasoning. My opponents know that I know that they know that I know that they know that I know that they know that I would never raise this UTG. Thus it must have immediate +EV.

TSP: Angelo you pizzaboy, you were never nothing and you will never be anything but a grinder in the gayest city known to man. I will bet $150,000 that you cannot win one pot in the next two days.

El Diablo: Deal.

JA Sucker: What happened next? Lemme guess, Doyle 3-bet out of the small blind with A3s. You [censored] kids never learn. The only way to beat live limit games is to fold, and then fold again.

Dcifrths: K I'm going to delete this thread. Can't have thoughtful discussion here, it ruins the forum. Anyway let me tell you about a hand. I have Gus Hansen on my left and Angelina is the BB. Hansen raises, I 3-bet K8o and Angelina 4-bets. I fold for metagame reasons. imo this is the play that separates the near experts from the probable experts from those that are still rookies at being experts.


El Diablo: Alright here, fellas. So last night I get home and this Spanish [censored] I'm banging with is like "yo D! Reservations for 10:00 at Nobu!" So I order some child porn, a WPT DVD, and the movie Torque off Netflix, tell my maid to have them ready when I get back, put on my mask and walk around like the Gimp from Pulp Fiction. BTW during this time I'm listening to a mix of the Killers, Ashlee Simpson, U2, White Stripes, and Usher. Just in case you thought I was out of touch with modern culture, FWIW. I head back to my laptop real quick, fire up the UB 25/50, move all-in my first hand, and bathe in my money as it comes out of my printer in laminated sheets. So then we head downstairs, and like, Kristin from Laguna Beach is like on TV!!!! I'm like "LOL" and my wife's like "OMG" and I go over and post it in OOT because there's probably a hidden, profound meaning within this. So on the way to Nobu, right, we pass by Union Square Cafe and I look inside... and it's KEANU REEVES. So I walk in and I'm like "sup" and he's like "whoa, SUP D!!" and I'm like "omg" and he's like "O M G" and so we sit down to take a rest. So I'm sitting there right and I notice that the noise has changed. I go outside and my driver Willie had turned off the limo. Well that was it for Willie. I come back wiping the blood off of my hands and I see Keanu and I'm like "yo, can you drive?" and he's like "DUDE" and I'm like "seriously?" and he's like "yes, like DEF MAN" and I ponder running to my house to post a preliminary trip report in OOT, but then I remember that it's at night, and you can't see the black people that rob you blind at night, so I think again. But then I'm like "dude, I'm like Prefontaine, except like, better." So I ran home. 5 miles, 3 minutes. El. [censored]. Diablo.

Tommy: Standard.

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Old 12-08-2005, 06:22 PM   #2
El Diablo
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Patrick,

Torque was sweet.

Best wishes,
El Diablo
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Old 12-08-2005, 06:24 PM   #3
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

pretty hilarious...just like a normal thread but i didn't even have to bother to think about an actual hand myself. Nice!
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Old 12-08-2005, 06:30 PM   #4
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Hi Patrick,

You forgot the part where Diablo weasels out of paying the tab, likely making me pay for it all. Just wanted to paint a truly accurate picture.

Best,
Sucker

PS: I still feel really bad for you about that game in '85. You were robbed.
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Old 12-08-2005, 06:34 PM   #5
IronFly
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Patrick,

nh.

IronFly
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Old 12-08-2005, 07:00 PM   #6
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Hi Patrick,

Good job. However, I'm more obsessed with Jarle than Lager, though I think Lager is the better player. Hope this clarification helps for a sequel.
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Old 12-08-2005, 07:00 PM   #7
HiatusOver
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

The fact that JV is not included in parody pantheon of mid-high post kind of ruins this for me...but it was decently done.

I would like to add this line

JV : Well, u guys might be able to run with me in limit hold em but f that, I only play on Sundays now...winning 50K every weekend in MTT's online is EZ! oh yea, and Ray come to chicago and lets talk about the merits of stricter handgun laws and some shorthanded Omaha...also I love David Sklansky and I dont care who knows it
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Old 12-08-2005, 07:09 PM   #8
El Diablo
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

JA,

FU for sticking me with the concert tickets. Next place we go will be expensive. That's two times in a row you got the best of me. There won't be a third.
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Old 12-08-2005, 07:18 PM   #9
bicyclekick
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

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Old 12-08-2005, 09:57 PM   #10
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

This is great lol
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Old 12-08-2005, 11:12 PM   #11
Justin A
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Quote:
Anyway let me tell you about a hand. I have Gus Hansen on my left and Angelina is the BB. Hansen raises, I 3-bet K8o and Angelina 4-bets. I fold for metagame reasons. imo this is the play that separates the near experts from the probable experts from those that are still rookies at being experts.
This is definitely my favorite part.
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Old 12-09-2005, 12:13 AM   #12
Peter_rus
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Though i don't catch a lot of humour in English usually, i used to smile not once while reading your post. Good job.
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Old 12-09-2005, 12:18 AM   #13
DcifrThs
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Quote:
Quote:
Anyway let me tell you about a hand. I have Gus Hansen on my left and Angelina is the BB. Hansen raises, I 3-bet K8o and Angelina 4-bets. I fold for metagame reasons. imo this is the play that separates the near experts from the probable experts from those that are still rookies at being experts.
This is definitely my favorite part.
yea im the butt of the joke and i thought it was funny and chuckled...it was just that goot

Barron
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Old 12-09-2005, 01:37 AM   #14
RED_RAIN
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Very close to my opinion of POTY

Now to continue the awesomeness, make one of those who have been banned.
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Old 12-09-2005, 02:48 AM   #15
daryn
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Quote:
Though i don't catch a lot of humour in English usually, i used to smile not once while reading your post. Good job.
looks like you also don't write well in english usually
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Old 12-09-2005, 02:55 AM   #16
DeezNutz3
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Quote:
Quote:
Though i don't catch a lot of humour in English usually, i used to smile not once while reading your post. Good job.
looks like you also don't write well in english usually
Man you've been being an ass lately. Funny post Patrick
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Old 12-09-2005, 04:49 AM   #17
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

This is phenomal stuff. The only was this could have been made funnier was if a random poll with no correlation to thread was thrown in on the end, like the one about asian chicks in that KK suited thread.
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Old 12-09-2005, 05:32 AM   #18
psycho7
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

hilarious

this was my favorite part, even though tommy a. is the man:

Quote:
Tommy: The ace of grace, the shoelace, and the mace, the race, and the taste, and I like saying a lot of words that don't mean anything.

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Old 12-09-2005, 08:55 AM   #19
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

this post is awesome it takes me back to the everquest days of msg boards.
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Old 12-09-2005, 09:03 AM   #20
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

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Old 12-09-2005, 10:22 AM   #21
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Quote:
Quote:
Though i don't catch a lot of humour in English usually, i used to smile not once while reading your post. Good job.
looks like you also don't write well in english usually
normal a$$holeness taken to the next level.
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Old 12-09-2005, 11:13 AM   #22
Baulucky
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Quote:
normal a$$holeness taken to the next level.

Would that qualify as an a$$whole?
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Old 12-09-2005, 11:39 AM   #23
Chobohoya
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Quote:
Hi Patrick,

You forgot the part where Diablo weasels out of paying the tab, likely making me pay for it all. Just wanted to paint a truly accurate picture.

Best,
Sucker

PS: I still feel really bad for you about that game in '85. You were robbed.
SERIOUSLY. Good call.
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Old 12-09-2005, 02:14 PM   #24
The DaveR
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Minnesota is not the East Coast.
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Old 12-09-2005, 02:32 PM   #25
Boris
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Re: Poker Rivals at Dinner

Well you can't really have "West Coast v. Fly Over". I say we count Minnesota as East Coast.
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