A little background
Some weeks ago, I made a list of the most absurd things I've ever done when on tilt. I did laugh quite a bit while compiling it (writing about kicking a hole into a door after losing a $1,000 flip is so much funnier than actually doing it haha), but it was pretty depressing for the most part so I'd rather not post it. I've been playing Poker for 15 years and I'm up like $10,000 overall (losing at No Limit Holdem, specifically in tournaments, breaking even at PLO and winning big at O8), but it's fair to say that Poker cost me much, much more than that in terms of opportunity costs. Luckily, I somehow managed to turn my real life around in the last 5 years so I (literally) have a job for life now and my Poker results won't have an influence on my well being unless I suddenly start crushing (I won't).

How I tilt
What I do basically every day is tilt rage in chat, play when I'm super tired/only just stood up/haven't eaten/taken a shower yet yada yada yada. I'm super terrible when it comes to managing my sessions and my bankroll. I play whatever I want to play. I have no clue whether I'm up or down for the week (despite winning $50 from a leaderboard and winning a small tournament twice in three days ).

**** Omaha Manager
I do use Omaha Manager, but I only have the Small Stakes version which doesn't help much if you play and lose at stakes higher than PLO(8) 50. What's more, it also ****s up hands played at NLO8 tables by calculating absurd amounts of rake if you're running it twice. Anyway, this is my month so far according to my database:


Why do I create this thread?
I've been meaning to do this for quite some time now and today's horrible session finally made it inevitable. I somehow managed to get it in stone dead in two consecutive O8 pots (each worth 1/10 of my "bankroll" lol) which is basically impossible unless you're playing really, really bad. Just another "hit the tables straight out of bed and get killed" session:


As for my "bankroll", I think I started the month around $300, dropped down to $50, got up to $600 (playing stakes from PLO8 2 to PLO 8 600 haha), lost back quite a bit and this is where I am right now:


I would like to
1. create some kind of accountability by forcing myself to continually post updates in this thread and either buying a full license for Omaha Manager or only playing below PLO8 50 (which would be reasonable anyway)
2. stop being such a ****ing degenerate (like sitting at NLO8 $3/$6 when you have $300 in your account and open jamming the first hand lol)
3. insulate Poker from my real life (eg no meaningful deposits from now on, don't let Poker have an influence on my sleeping schedule)
4. fix my massive tilt leaks. I won't happen today and I won't happen tomorrow, but I might get there in the long term.

Please, please, please post it. No judgements here I'm just very curious and it sounds like it will be interesting.

Either way good luck DDD.

Thank you.

I'd still rather not post the whole list, but I might post the occasional story every now and then.

As for today's Poker, I played some more and got absolutely murdered by a super whale. Poker is not fun if you flop top set and you just KNOW you're not going to win the hand.



GG 1/3 of my bankroll.

I guess the lesson here is to play as well as you can at all times because tilting will just crush you if you're running bad on top of it.

Played some more godawful Poker, lost some more.

I didn't play stakes higher than PLO 50 today, so this actually paints an accurate picture:



On a more positive note,
- broke even in EV terms after the horrible morning session,
- lost one EV buy-in in total, running 6 buy-ins below EV, so my loss is mostly down to playing badly at the biggest stake,
- received $50 from a leaderboard,
- cleared $10 in bonuses (both of which had very little or nothing to do with today's play) and
- cashed in my new favourite tournament which has to be among the softest tournaments I've ever played (net win of +$10, 4 top 5 finishes in 5 attempts this week haha - I will admit it only had <30 runners in each of those).

Current BR: $377,19
Total loss for today: -$160
Net change of account balances: -$100

Not exactly the best day, but I've had worse. Games were pretty soft and I definitely should have made some Skansky $$$ if it wasn't for playing horribly.

One more day full of tilt.

I pissed away three stacks to one opponent in like 5 hands so that's a new personal record for me lol. This happened 12 hours ago and I don't even remember what triggered it.

Also ran into a setup at NLO8 50 and put a colossal beat on my opponent (I held AAK4 on a J32 flop, villain has me basically dead for 1/4 and even turned a full house with AJ34, I bink a one outer to scoop).

In EV terms, all of my losses were incurred at stakes higher than PLO10 and I may be done with those for a while now. $100 bankroll would be plenty if I don't play higher than say PLO8 5 so I might just cash out the rest.

I was snapped off by top pair on a 9676 board in the final hand after raising flop into two people and jamming turn for 60bb so gg Poker for today lol. Getting snapped in bluffing spots like that (I had A374) is just a kind reminder that I should play my big hands much quicker.

Yeah I'm quite curious about the list also! You seems to have trouble sticking to one game. If you play to high you'll go broke it has nothing to do with tilt. I used to be a monkey. I share a story you share the list?

-Loosing 33% of my roll in a night. AND flipping it on red (obv).
-Popping up a p*rnhub tab while 8-10 tabling.
- When I was loosing back in the day I HAD to get even for the day. Cant recount the number of night of despair. in the hundred's.

It's O8 and most pots are split so I guess it's ok to play pretty fast and loose in terms of bankroll management a) if you have an edge and b) you can handle losses well. Unfortunately, neither is the case for me and the absence of b) influences a) quite a bit.

As for "the list", I think I deleted the file.

Here's the most degen thing I've ever done:

$50 > $10,000 > $0 on BWIN in 3 days
If I remember correctly, I was betting sports on the 1st day and went all-in every game in the most -EV spots possible. I ran insanely hot and went from $50 to $1,000 on that day. On the next day, I sat at a Roulette table (I had never played Roulette before), starting out at a "conservative" $100 per spin and ran hot again. Next thing I know I'm betting $500 per spin and peak at $10,000ish. I obviously lose some back so I quit at $3,000 and try and cash out all of it. I was a student living on maybe $1,000 a month back then so obviously this was a lot of money to me. BWIN didn't process cash outs immediately so I cancelled it the next day, lost some more, rinse and repeat until busto.

This happened back in December 2005 and I didn't feel particularly well in the weeks after that. That said, it makes me laugh to this day and I may be proud of it in some very weird way. Let's just say I could tell this story to everybody who knows me and they probably wouldn't believe that I have ever done something like this.

Okay I'm sorry I will try to remember you as the degen O8 guy haha.
Solid swing as a student. I can see why you didn't feel that good.

Did have my first +EV cash game day today, but I ran pretty bad. The chances of me busting my ACR roll aren't exactly zero at this point haha.



This is the big hand at 120ish or so. I didn't even realize I had him pretty much dead for low as well ...



Felt like I played ok for most of the day (calling with KK54 not included lol).

I did register for 3 tournaments today, mincashed in a $4 one for $15 or so (Bounties included, 2 bullets) and busted in 2 $16 tournaments. The second one was particularly frustrating. I ran up a huge stack and basically just punted it away for no reason, as I have done many, many, many times before. This is the final hand:

Winning Poker, Omaha H/L Pot Limit - 2,250/4,500 (225 ante) - 5 players
Hand delivered by Upswing Poker

UTG: 58,571 (13 bb)
CO: 67,838 (15 bb)
BU: 225,738 (50 bb)
SB (Hero): 163,221 (36 bb)
BB: 537,742 (119 bb)

Pre-Flop: (7,875) Hero is SB with A♣ 3♦ 9♣ 5♦
2 players fold, BTN raises to 11,250, Hero calls 9,000, BB calls 6,750

Flop: (34,875) 9♠ 2♣ 8♠ (3 players)
Hero checks, BB checks, BTN bets 11,700, Hero calls 11,700, BB calls 11,700

Turn: (69,975) K♣ (3 players)
Hero checks, BB checks, BTN bets 58,725, Hero calls 58,725, BB folds

River: (187,425) K♥ (2 players)
Hero checks, BTN bets 127,443, Hero calls 81,321 (all-in)

This happened with 40 players left (Top 27 get paid). 36bb is a huge stack this late in an O8 tournament and it's pretty tough to not cash unless you're me. As a matter of fact, even 18bb (calling all the way and folding river) is a pretty decent stack and should have been enough to make it to the money. And don't even get me started about the bounty implications ...

I probably should have folded turn, but it may be too tight to do that. Then again, villain blasted turn into two opponents and I block many of his semi-bluffs/big draws, so I really have no clue what I was thinking on the river.

In the last weeks, I've won and lost $200 in a day many times, but this one hand actually had me talking to myself. Jesus Christ ...

I should probably just stop playing tournaments altogether with the sole exception of the $4 one which still is the softest tournament I've ever seen. The $16 ones probably don't fall into that category and I really hate the 3 hour late registration period. I'm probably playing my best when I'm playing short session and can come and go whenever I want so even registering for tournaments that force you to play 3 hours before the tournament actually starts makes no sense at all for me. I did stick to cash games only on Pokerstars some weeks ago and I was amazed by how much easier things were then, so I should just do that again.

I guess I'm playing too much or the games are just super good or whatever. Anyway, seeing 1 outers on ACR seems pretty normal at this point (I've handed out one myself, see above, but technically I got it in with 35% and the one outer was only for scooping the pot). I remember how this kind of thing would get me super agitated, but you just shrug it off on this site. Please don't mistake this for "rigged" talk, I'm just venting a little because my sample on Pokerstars is probably 100 times bigger and I barely remember seeing any of those on there at all ...

Anyway, villain quit immediately and so did I 2 hands after that. This is probably the best thing I could have done in this spot and I should definitely quit more often and more quickly in situations like that ...

Love how he left himself with 3bb after potting flop. Good trap, sir ...

"If my daddy knew I was losing in this poker game, he'd come out of the grave and beat the heck out of me."
(Doyle Brunson)



15:45

BR: $73,77 on 888, $111,45 on ACR for a net loss of -$36,86 this week. I cashed out 150 Euros or -$178 on 888 mostly because I don't player games bigger than PLO8 10 on there so >$70 is plenty for staying in action. I will probably just put those 150 Euros on ACR if and when I go bust there.

Felt like I played pretty well overall. I didn't tilt a whole lot in terms of playing badly, mostly due to quitting pretty quickly if something didn't go my way, BUT I did tilt a lot in registering for random tournaments that I don't have an edge in, didn't really feel like playing etc. As I've done many times before, I found myself in a $2 PKO when I just wanted quit so I started open-jamming every hand for 5 hands straight until I got A5dd, managed to get called by worse and obviously lost lol.

Ran pretty terribly overall, losing most 60/40s or 70/30s when it mattered and made a colossal mistake in the biggest equity spot I've had in weeks, so losing is mostly down to me.

As for cash games, played well for the most part and ran like ****.



My actual EV would be even higher, but Omaha Manager ****s up O8 equities if you run it twice.

Just to give you an example, this is the very last hand (quit instantly after that one):



Flop equities according to Omaha Manager:



Equity calculation according to Omaha Manager after running it twice:



So basically Omaha Manager turns a +$6 EV play into a -$12 EV play just because we ran it twice, and this is one single hand. I should probably stop using this feature in order to have more accurate records, but this would also limit my play to games that I'm actually rolled for so we'll have to wait and see about that lol.

Cliffs
- Played ok for most of the week, racked up some EV$$$ in the process, ran terribly
- Made a colossal mistake in a tournament for $$$ (relative to my bankroll)
- Lost quite a bit of money/added unnecessary variance in 0 EV spots
- Ended up losing slightly and tournament degeneracy played a big part in that

Played some more and won some money back.

Final BR is $196,14 ($82,08 on 888, $114,06 on ACR).

Didn't play any tournaments besides the $4 NLO8 KO one on 888 which I mincashed after running up a huge stack and running super bad against an opponent who was basically playing Omaha High only and just god moded me in every pot. The most tilting hand was right around the bubble when I got him all-in on a 9824 board holding AJ39. We both had >50bb stacks, I jammed all-in for 3 times pot lol and he called me with AK36. River is a 5 gg. I could have folded the final hand which was also against him, but I called off 7bb and got it in as slight favourite. He obviously has a high hand and hits the perfect board instanty, gg.

As for cash games, I ran super hot on the $5 tables and didn't get anything going on the higher ones despite seeing some ridiculous play. Whatever. Also punted off in 0 EV spots again.

My goal is to stick to cash games and the $4 tournament only for now. I like my stats in that one hehe:



Still a net loser in tournaments due to getting killed in the bigger ones and them being too expensive for my bankroll in general. What's more, the two bust-outs from the $16 PKO one where the most infuriating Poker moments I've had in quite some time. By that I don't mean losing per se, but just being super angry at myself for ****ing up. Playing too high while having no clue what you're doing and lacking the self discipline to execute the little you know is just a recipe for disaster. I might as well stop playing them.

I'm having a decent week so far lol.



Pretty much busted my account on ACR ($23,43) playing cash games, won on 888 playing tournaments ($129,35). I actually only played two tournaments in total, so that's definitely a positive (cashed in both of them and was heads-up for the last one only to lose the final 55/45 for an additional $35). Then again, I rebought like 7 times in those 2 runs which doesn't exactly scream "self control". Also tilted my ass off in cash games and got punished by running pretty badly.

Not sure whether I will deposit more money into ACR. I started July with $300 on ACR and $30 on 888 and the account balances have basically been reversed if you factor in withdrawals. I might as well stick to playing on 888 where I'm clearly winning and not degening higher buy-ins at all.

Edit: Played another quick session on ACR and pissed away the rest in no time, basically losing 3 40/60s for 30bbs each. WP me haha.

So yeah, new BR is $129,35 on 888.

... for a net loss of -$90 since starting this thread (withdrawals included).

Going broke on ACR was a blessing in disguise.

The very next day, I was playing on 888 and got fed up pretty quicky so I exluded myself from playing altogether for a full month. Some days after that, I wanted to play some more so I checked out different deposit options for ACR and made my first Bitcoin deposit. More importantly, I also made my first Bitcoin withdawal later that week and it was both quick and super easy. I wish I had done this earlier, it would have saved me some trouble. Quick and easy withdrawals mean that my implicit excuse for degening on ACR ("It's basically play money") is dead.

Being able to deposit and withdraw money easily definitely saved me a lot of money in the last two weeks alone. You can't sit at PLO8 100 if you only have $50 in your account plus I actually made withdrawals on several occasions when I felt I was tilting my ass off. Doing this basically puts me out of action since I can't just buy Bitcoins instantly, at least not on the platform I use.

Now does this mean I didn't degen? Clearly not haha. Some highlights include re-entering my nemesis $16 PKO tournament three times in like 10 minutes, rebuying 4 times in a satellite that only paid 5x the buy-in for first, going off a cliff in cash games for no reason etc etc haha.

That said, I think I played okayish in cash games and did make some EV. Running hot didn't hurt either:


Luckily, I ran super hot in some tournaments as well, making several final tables in KO tournaments and actually winning one of them. On top of that, I won a few tournament tickets. The flip side of all this tournament stuff: I obviously made some colossal punts as well. I have a lot to learn in those, but the games look super soft so I may have an edge. Some of the plays I've seen in satellites specifically make it basically impossible not to have a positive expectation in those. I mean, only yesterday I saw a guy sitting on 50bb with 7 players left (5 tickets for 25x the buy-in each, 3 short stacks) and he managed to finish 6th.

As of today, my account balance on ACR is $125ish + two tournament tickets worth $33 and $95 respectively. Also made a withdrawal of $200 earlier this week so I basically quadrupled my $100 deposit in two weeks. I'll take it.

Winning Poker, Omaha H/L No Limit - $3/$6 - 3 players
Replay this hand on Upswing Poker

BU (Hero): $113.29 (19 bb)
SB: $335.50 (56 bb)
BB: $143.50 (24 bb)

Pre-Flop: ($9) Hero is BTN with Q♣ A♦ 2♦ K♣
Hero calls $6, SB raises to $335.50 (all-in), 1 fold, Hero calls $107.29 (all-in)

Flop: ($232.58) 7♣ T♣ K♥ (2 players, 2 all-in)

Turn: ($232.58) 7♦ (2 players, 2 all-in)

River: ($232.58) 8♦ (2 players, 2 all-in)

Total pot: $232.58 (Rake: $1.50)

Showdown:
SB shows T♥ A♠ 3♥ 4♥ (HI: two pair, Tens and Sevens)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 38%, Flop: 21%, Turn: 5%, River: 0%)

BU (Hero) shows Q♣ A♦ 2♦ K♣ (HI: two pair, Kings and Sevens)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 62%, Flop: 79%, Turn: 95%, River: 100%)

BU (Hero) wins $231.08

I lol'd. In before busto obviously .

When you shrug/put it in, expecting to get quarterted and you actually get it in super good three ways in a colossal pot ...

Not sure why but somehow BB doesn't strike me as a winning player haha.

Winning Poker, Omaha H/L Pot Limit - 500/1,000 (50 ante) - 6 players
Replay this hand on Upswing Poker

UTG: 177,842 (178 bb)
MP (Hero): 99,005 (99 bb)
CO: 76,993 (77 bb)
BU: 125,768 (126 bb)
SB: 37,450 (37 bb)
BB: 95,644 (96 bb)

Pre-Flop: (1,800) Hero is MP with 4♦ A♣ 9♣ 2♣
UTG raises to 3,800, Hero calls 3,800, 3 players fold, BB calls 2,800

Flop: (12,200) 7♣ 9♠ 8♠ (3 players)
BB checks, UTG bets 12,200, Hero calls 12,200, BB calls 12,200

Turn: (48,800) 6♦ (3 players)
BB checks, UTG bets 48,800, Hero raises to 82,955 (all-in), BB calls 79,594 (all-in), UTG calls 34,155

River: (294,304) T♦ (3 players, 2 all-in)

Total pot: 294,304

Showdown:
MP (Hero) shows 4♦ A♣ 9♣ 2♣ (HI: a pair of Nines; LO: 8-7-6-2-A)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 41%, Flop: 57%, Turn: 78%, River: 50%)

UTG shows A♥ 7♦ 3♣ K♠ (HI: a pair of Sevens; LO: 8-7-6-3-A)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 29%, Flop: 15%, Turn: 8%, River: 0%)

BB shows J♠ A♦ 7♥ 3♥ (HI: a straight, Seven to Jack; LO: 8-7-6-3-A)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 30%, Flop: 28%, Turn: 14%, River: 50%)

MP (Hero) wins 150,513
BB wins 143,791

at least he has a gutter to go along with his dominated low, unlike the other guy

epic button clicking

also GL GL OP

ty ty

Not sure whether any of them even thought about high potential at all (I for one expected to be dead for high 100%) which makes calling it off with 2nd nut low with no counterfeit protection even more laughable, but hey, I will take it.

Had a pretty big run and won bounties left and right so I ended the day pretty much even despite sitting and obviously losing at PLO8 100 and punting off my $33 tournament ticket by late-regging for 10bb in a bounty tournament lol. I jam TT UTG in the second hand, BTN rejams with QQ, gg. Kind of lol when I think about how I really put in some effort to win this ticket in the first place ...

As for the O8 one, one of the more annoying ways to go out ...


Yatahay Network - 8000/16000 PL (6 max) - Omaha Hi/Lo - 4 players
Hand converted by Holdem Manager 3

Hero (CO): 417,214 (26.1 bb)
BTN: 3,929,613 (245.6 bb)
SB: 861,822 (53.9 bb)
BB: 1,535,680 (96 bb)

4 players post ante of 800, SB posts 8,000, BB posts 16,000

Pre Flop: (pot: 27,200) Hero has 5 A Q 3
Hero raises to 37,600, BTN calls 37,600, fold, BB calls 21,600

Flop: (124,000, 3 players) J 8 T
BB checks, Hero checks, BTN checks

Turn: (124,000, 3 players) K
BB bets 31,000, Hero raises to 124,000, fold, BB raises to 496,000, Hero calls 254,814 and is all-in

River: (881,628, 2 players) K

Results: 881,628 pot (0 rake)
Final Board: J 8 T K K

Hero shows 5 A Q 3: (Straight, Ace High)
(Pre 50%, Flop 22%, Turn 45%)

BB shows Q T A K: (Full House, Kings full of Tens)
(Pre 50%, Flop 78%, Turn 55%)

BB wins 881,628

I busted my ACR account again.

I cashed out $165 after making this post so I didn't lose it all technically speaking. I busted in both satellites so $-128 on the tournament tickets. Also put some money on $16, $22, and $27 tournaments. I didn't cash in any of them and lost in cash games as well (my EV line was break-even which is pretty bad anyway). As for the tournaments, I feel like I put myself in spots I had a decent edge in but ran bad when it really mattered, specifically busting with 80/20s on the flop for something like 20-30bb in both O8 tournaments. My opponents had 4% to scoop in each of those pots and got there in both. Then again, I still had $50 in my account and basically just punted those away for no reason whatsoever. My account balance hit $0 so I cashed in my rakeback for $1 and just went all-in Paisting style with 72o, 54o and QTdd in three consecutive hands and won all of them lol. Only now I got it in with KK vs 55 (my guess is my opponent called pretty happily) and held (yay $6,09!).

Thank god I cashed out and I can't buy new BTC instantly on the platform I use so the damage I can do right now is very limited. I guess it's about time I take a break and only come back when I actually want to play Poker again. This doesn't seem to be the case right now.

hey

that sucks dude.

my 2c :

Omaha tournaments are extremely high variance, O8 definitely cuts it some with pot splitting, but you are picking a high variance format with MTT play to devote volume to, and are ramping it up with the fact that it`s omaha.

I would try to be more structured with your play, and stick to O8 or omaha high cash. the bankroll requirements are going to be lower, and you can really put your head down, and try to grind volume while keeping mental game good.

Ultimately, you are in control of whether or not you choose to gamble when losing, but maybe adding a bit more structure would help with that. tiltbreaker is a good program if you are raging. don`t play if you are mad

best of luck

Jared Tendler?

Ok, I can run like god, too

I got into the money with a 9bb stack and now I'm sitting >50bb deep maybe 20 hands later lol

Winning Poker, Omaha H/L Pot Limit - 3,500/7,000 (350 ante) - 6 players
Replay this hand on Upswing Poker

UTG: 257,602 (37 bb)
MP: 656,508 (94 bb)
CO: 273,731 (39 bb)
BU: 430,308 (61 bb)
SB: 246,034 (35 bb)
BB (Hero): 55,856 (8 bb)

Pre-Flop: (12,600) Hero is BB with 7♣ 6♥ A♠ 3♦
2 players fold, CO raises to 14,000, BTN calls 14,000, 1 fold, Hero calls 7,000

Flop: (47,600) 4♥ 2♣ 3♥ (3 players)
Hero checks, CO checks, BTN bets 23,800, Hero calls 23,800, CO folds

Turn: (95,200) 5♦ (2 players)
Hero checks, BTN bets 23,800, Hero calls 17,706 (all-in)

River: (130,612) K♦ (2 players, 1 all-in)

Total pot: 130,612

Showdown:
BU shows 7♥ 4♣ A♦ 5♥ (HI: a straight, Ace to Five; LO: 5-4-3-2-A)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 51%, Flop: 90%, Turn: 42%, River: 25%)

BB (Hero) shows 7♣ 6♥ A♠ 3♦ (HI: a straight, Three to Seven; LO: 5-4-3-2-A)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 49%, Flop: 10%, Turn: 58%, River: 75%)

BU wins 32,653
BB (Hero) wins 97,959


Winning Poker, Omaha H/L Pot Limit - 3,500/7,000 (350 ante) - 6 players
Replay this hand on Upswing Poker

UTG: 259,031 (37 bb)
MP: 406,755 (58 bb)
CO: 241,834 (35 bb)
BU (Hero): 94,109 (13 bb)
SB: 249,902 (36 bb)
BB: 668,408 (95 bb)

Pre-Flop: (12,600) Hero is BTN with Q♥ Q♦ 9♣ 8♠
1 fold, MP calls 7,000, 1 fold, Hero calls 7,000, SB calls 3,500, BB checks

Flop: (30,100) 4♠ Q♠ 5♦ (4 players)
SB checks, BB checks, MP bets 30,100, Hero raises to 86,759 (all-in), SB raises to 242,552 (all-in), BB folds, MP calls 212,452

Turn: (601,963) 4♦ (3 players, 2 all-in)

River: (601,963) J♥ (3 players, 2 all-in)

Total pot: 601,963

Showdown:
SB shows A♦ 5♥ 7♥ 5♣ (HI: a full house, Fives full of Fours)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 41%, Flop: 19%, Turn: 11%, River: 0%)

BU (Hero) shows Q♥ Q♦ 9♣ 8♠ (HI: a full house, Queens full of Fours)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 26%, Flop: 37%, Turn: 65%, River: 100%)

MP shows 6♥ K♠ K♣ 3♥ (HI: two pair, Kings and Fours)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 34%, Flop: 44%, Turn: 24%, River: 0%)

SB wins 311,586
BU (Hero) wins 290,377

I do own "The Mental Game of Poker" and "Positive Poker". I will try to read at least one of them until the end of the month.

Thank you, you make some valid points.

Sticking to cash games only would obviously be a smart move. I've tried it some months ago when I only played on Pokerstars and simply exluded myself from joining tournaments at all. It's safe to say that life is much easier for me whenever I do that.

However , I do find tournaments super fun and nothing will ever beat the feeling of being tired, but happy after winning one of those ****ers haha. I guess dealing with massive variance is just the price you have to pay to enjoy the few (and super random) massive wins.

As for variance, I don't play Omaha high only tournaments at all. The $16 PKO O8 one I play basically every day now is just super deep so this reduces variance a bit. Losing to 4% scoops doesn't happen all the often and every now and then I will run super good as well (see above). I guess it's all about really making it count in those big runs.

My MASSIVE leak is registering for tournaments when I have neither the intention nor the time to play them reasonably until the very end. Just to give you an example, I registered in a $27 PKO NLHE tournament yesterday and got super tired 2 hours in so I randomly started jamming my 80bb stack because I just wanted it to be over. I can't even remember how often I've done **** like this in the past. I think I'll be just fine once I stop doing that.

With that said, 12 players left in the PKO one, I have 40bb and cover some players with massive bounties. Let's go.