I first deposited $100 in 1/15 and 1-tabled 5nl FR with no poker experience; by 9/15 I was 4-tabling 25nl 6M with ~60bi from the same $100. No HUD, no significant tourney scores, no poker friends; just work ethic really.

Over the next 6 months I went BE. Kinda. Still no HUD/db; I was manually tracking wins/losses/data in a notepad file (lawl). I started playing MTTs after my sessions, chasing a big shortcut which never came. In hindsight I should've been blasting 50nl like it was on my turf in Juarez, but I was a BR nit (shot 10nl FR at ~30bi, 25nl FR ~35bi). One day I went through my "db.txt" (lawl) and manually calculated (lawl) to realize I had unwittingly nickel and dimed a healthy cash WR into entries; I would've had the roll I was trying to jump to if I'd just stuck to my grind. Naturally, I've since sworn off MTTs as coincidental edge lotteries. Got a new job, burned out, lost the romantic view of poker.

Over the next (past) year I turned into a rec. I had been in my self-imposed +-3bi std dev of obliviousness for so long that 25nl felt like playmoney. Shot 50nl, heatered to ~40bi, spewed it back. No volume. Short zoom sessions, phone sessions, clicking buttons. Adulterants and adultery; RIP dopamine/serotonin. Bad tilt. Low motivation. I felt my edge evaporating; continuously lower volume made it progressively worse, which made me tilt progressively more. When the smoke cleared my roll was down to, quite literally, about $treefiddy.

Last month I inexplicably felt the fire. Maybe fight>flight (degen). Maybe I decided to see what I'm capable of (degen). Maybe no gamble no future (...). Regardless, the streets were calling. I finally stopped being 2 kool and bought PT4 for my comeback. I originally intended to shake my ring rust, build a viable FR sample to analyze, and then take a live shot; however, I'm pretty obsessed with playing online again. For better or worse, all I want to do right now is wake up and grind.

I have no real goal as far as stakes. I still have a dedicated live roll waiting to fire. I'm just focused on playing well until 50k/h and going from there. For 95% confidence it seems 100k/h are needed, but meh. All criticism is encouraged. All blowups and graph dives will be included for your personal schadenfreude.

iPoker - $0.25 NL - Holdem - 8 players
Hand converted by PokerTracker 4

UTG: $44.16
UTG+1: $11.00
MP: $15.84
Hero (MP+1): $27.50
CO: $23.92
BTN: $13.72
SB: $28.15
BB: $25.12

SB posts SB $0.10, BB posts BB $0.25

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.35) Hero has 9 J

fold, fold, MP calls $0.25, Hero raises to $1.00, fold, fold, fold, fold, MP calls $0.75

Flop: ($2.35, 2 players) 4 J T
MP checks, Hero bets $1.35, MP calls $1.35

Turn: ($5.05, 2 players) Q
MP bets $0.75, Hero calls $0.75

River: ($6.55, 2 players) 3
MP checks, Hero bets $24.40, fold

Hero mucks 9 J (One Pair, Jacks)

Hero wins $30.63

iPoker - $0.25 NL - Holdem - 6 players
Hand converted by PokerTracker 4

UTG: $27.70
MP: $15.00
Hero (CO): $25.92
BTN: $13.83
SB: $25.00
BB: $29.46

SB posts SB $0.10, BB posts BB $0.25

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.35) Hero has J Q

UTG calls $0.25, fold, Hero raises to $1.00, fold, fold, fold, UTG calls $0.75

Flop: ($2.35, 2 players) Q 9 5
UTG bets $2.35, Hero calls $2.35

Turn: ($7.05, 2 players) 2
UTG bets $4.35, Hero calls $4.35

River: ($15.75, 2 players) 2
UTG bets $18.22, Hero calls $18.22

iPoker - $0.25 NL - Holdem - 8 players
Hand converted by PokerTracker 4

UTG+1: $12.85
MP: $33.65
MP+1: $41.23
CO: $17.09
Hero (BTN): $27.00
SB: $23.40
BB: $25.00
UTG: $26.83

SB posts SB $0.10, BB posts BB $0.25

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.35) Hero has A 9

fold, fold, MP calls $0.25, fold, fold, Hero raises to $1.00, fold, fold, MP calls $0.75

Flop: ($2.35, 2 players) 4 7 9
MP bets $1.17, Hero calls $1.17

Turn: ($4.69, 2 players) 3
MP bets $2.34, Hero calls $2.34

River: ($9.37, 2 players) T
MP bets $4.68, Hero calls $4.68

This is so embarassing. Nobody can say I only post glamour hands. Okay. Is this a cbet with the pre dynamic? I mean wtf does an oop double-cc range hit if not this board? Think I'm gonna be xr'd into a 3:1 or an spr 3bj and gii under/flipping pretty often. What does a bet accomplish; what is he ever dropping here besides 22-66? I'm not worried about balance/mdf against these guys (hence me not hammering the 100bb .33/.6 f/t 3bp line). As played, are you ever raising turn with good (yet face-up) sdv ip?

iPoker - $0.25 NL - Holdem - 8 players
Hand converted by PokerTracker 4

UTG: $22.58
UTG+1: $22.41
MP: $28.16
Hero (MP+1): $23.25
CO: $24.65
BTN: $65.55
SB: $28.67
BB: $34.43

SB posts SB $0.10, BB posts BB $0.25

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.35) Hero has A K

UTG raises to $0.75, UTG+1 calls $0.75, fold, Hero raises to $2.50, fold, fold, fold, fold, fold, UTG+1 calls $1.75

Flop: ($6.10, 2 players) J 8 9
UTG+1 checks, Hero checks

Turn: ($6.10, 2 players) K
UTG+1 bets $2.75, Hero calls $2.75

River: ($11.60, 2 players) Q
UTG+1 bets $7.00, fold

This was my first 3b at this table over ~9 orbits, no prior history; meaning my .5/.5 is admittedly uninspired, but he had no sizing tell on me apart from population tendencies. I'm unconvinced that I need to invest more or get too fancy, but I still kinda hate it. Is turn a 3bj? I have direct odds vs a purely nutted range. Which hands ever conceivably c pre c otf then r/f ott besides specifically QQ/98hh/97hh/87hh, and why would he raise given prior action? If he has no probable bluffs, and I have/need no FE vs the only (highly)unlikely combos, why would I ever push? Purely "I don't think he'll pay off a bd/3 ip with spr?" Am I underestimating the opposition here?

iPoker - $0.25 NL (6 max) - Holdem - 5 players
Hand converted by PokerTracker 4

CO: $122.89
BTN: $29.05
Hero (SB): $41.03
BB: $26.10
UTG: $24.12

Hero posts SB $0.10, BB posts BB $0.25

Pre Flop: (pot: $0.35) Hero has A 4

fold, CO raises to $0.75, fold, Hero raises to $2.50, fold, CO calls $1.75

Flop: ($5.25, 2 players) 5 6 2
Hero bets $2.80, CO calls $2.80

Turn: ($10.85, 2 players) J
Hero bets $5.60, CO raises to $13.82, Hero calls $8.22

River: ($38.49, 2 players) J
Hero checks, CO bets $38.49, fold

UTG+1 shows 7 A (High Card, Ace)
(Pre 33%, Flop 54%, Turn 34%)
Hero shows 8 8 (One Pair, Eights)
(Pre 67%, Flop 46%, Turn 66%)
Hero wins $32.11

BB shows T Q (One Pair, Queens)
(Pre 32%, Flop 17%, Turn 9%)
Hero shows A Q (Two Pair, Aces and Queens)
(Pre 68%, Flop 83%, Turn 91%)
Hero wins $27.89

CO shows Q K (Two Pair, Kings and Queens)
(Pre 26%, Flop 16%, Turn 9%)
Hero shows A K (Two Pair, Aces and Kings)
(Pre 74%, Flop 84%, Turn 91%)
Hero wins 188.32 BB

Hero wins 128.04 BB

Hero shows 7 7 (Four of a Kind, Sevens)

Hero wins 187.96 BB

Hero shows A A (One Pair, Aces)

Hero wins 192.4 BB

CO shows A Q (Two Pair, Queens and Fives)
(Pre 24%, Flop 82%, Turn 93%)
Hero shows K A (One Pair, Fives)
(Pre 76%, Flop 18%, Turn 7%)
CO wins 188.4 BB
Hero wins 9.92 BB

Hero shows J A (Flush, Ace High)
(Pre 13%, Flop 43%, Turn 100%)
CO shows A A (One Pair, Aces)
(Pre 87%, Flop 57%, Turn 0%)
Hero wins 263.4 BB

MP+1 shows K J (Two Pair, Kings and Jacks)
(Pre 59%, Flop 17%, Turn 9%)
Hero shows T Q (Flush, King High)
(Pre 41%, Flop 83%, Turn 91%)
MP+1 wins $6.49
Hero wins $48.10

MP shows 5 7 (Two Pair, Sevens and Fives)

Main Pot [$61.65]: (Pre 15%, Flop 0.4%, Turn 0%)

Hero mucks 4 6 (Straight, Seven High)

Main Pot [$61.65]: (Pre 15%, Flop 71%, Turn 0%)
Side Pot#1 [$9.00]: (Pre 18%, Flop 71%, Turn 0%)

BB shows 7 7 (Full House, Sevens full of Threes)

Main Pot [$61.65]: (Pre 70%, Flop 28%, Turn 100%)
Side Pot#1 [$9.00]: (Pre 82%, Flop 29%, Turn 100%)

BB wins $74.50

SB shows Q Q (One Pair, Queens)
(Pre 18%, Flop 8%, Turn 5%)
Hero shows A A (One Pair, Aces)
(Pre 82%, Flop 92%, Turn 95%)
Hero wins $96.50

Hero shows Q A (Four of a Kind, Queens)

Hero wins $203.98

BTN shows K 4 (Two Pair, Kings and Fours)
(Pre 23%, Flop 11%, Turn 80%)
Hero mucks A K (One Pair, Kings)
(Pre 77%, Flop 89%, Turn 20%)
BTN wins $104.35