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Old 12-22-2019, 11:07 PM   #351
IntheNow
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

Bump. Hows it been going lately man?
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Old 01-03-2020, 04:06 AM   #352
Oladipo
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

2019

(warning, bit of an unedited ramble as I just finished a 4 hr rostucko and am just wanting to get this up)

Hey everybody, sorry I haven't been active in here. I will take time to respond to people individually but I just wanted to post an end of year recap. I'm not sure yet if I will continue in here or start a new one, as I want to continue to blog (more steadily, though).

I think that what’s happened is that over the last couple years of long term rehab and subsequent recovery, being in AA meetings every week hearing people talk about themselves, is that I am just so TIRED of talking about myself that it’s hard for me to want to blog about it in here. It's not just in here, either, IRL I don't feel like talking about myself either. Anyways:

*In regards to the whole ignition topic that took over this thread, I just stopped posting because I said my 2 cents about it and it then spiraled into something completely out of control, with a lot of opinions that I didn’t agree with. My point was that it really felt that something was “off” having been so far under ev for so long.

I was invited to a skype group with a bunch of winning regs at 500+ who were discussing it, many who were struggling to win, and some who were doing fine. I have come to the conclusion that while of course there is going to be some amount of collusion going on in an anonymous pool, it seems obvious to me that the games just got a lot harder and that people who crushed so easily in 2018 stopped crushing. I definitely noticed a change in the games during just this year, certainly at 1k and to a lesser extent, but still noticeably, at 500nl. By playing closer to equilibrium and studying more, rather than playing extremely exploitatively like I used to, my winrate has improved and I feel confident in my edge there. It goes without saying that I wasn’t playing my A game for stretches while being that far under EV as well, so my variance was more extreme than it should have been.

**Something weird DID happen to me, though, and I’m still not sure what to think of it. Over the course of the year I made friends through the poker world, have a bunch of ppl on skype, including a lot of people who I play against. Earlier this month, when I went to shut down my computer, on the screen that tells you what programs are preventing windows from shut it down, there was a program clearly in another language, which I am 99% sure is Russian. It would only be there sometimes, and since I’ve never noticed any ONE player showing down any weird hands which would make me skeptical, I didn’t think a ton of it, since I have so many poker programs on my computer. Then I started to think about it, and I tried to get my fiancée to film it, because it would only appear for a split second, not long enough to take a picture. I did a ton of different virus scans, didn’t find anything, looked through all my processes through Task Manager numerous times, didn’t find anything, and finally just decided to reinstall windows on my computer. Because it said it would save the files, I thought it would save my pt4 db, but it didn’t, so I only have my hands on Ignition from December on, since Chico doesn’t store hands in a hand history file. This is just fine anyways since I have improved so much in the last couple months, and in any case, it kind of feels like a release from it. I definitely felt like I was in an ev quicksand and it affected me mentally in a lot of different ways, so I am pretty happy to feel some space away from it.




December turned out great on ignition (pic - above EV!!!!), and I’m going to continue to put most of my volume there for the foreseeable future. I notice a big drop in my game by adding more than 5 tables and for now I’m focused on getting a big sample up to see where my actual winrate is, since I've adjusted and improved my game so much recently.

Year Recap


1. I notched another calendar year free from the grasp of booze and drugs. Although I find the idea of defining myself through my sobriety pretty repelling, I am proud of the person that I’ve become while living sober. Most importantly, in 98% of situations I have become completely comfortable in my own skin. This was a huge battle for me my entire life. I don’t have to overcompensate for what I see in the mirror, and I no longer rely on the opinions of others in order to feel positive about myself. I don’t act egotistically (most of the time) because of that inherent insecurity.

2. I had a really successful year in poker. I had nowhere near the 250k smashfest I envisioned after winning ~45k on iggy @ 10-12bbs/100 over the first 200k hands of this year and winning 18k in 3 weeks of live poker during my time in LA. Instead, soon after that I became overconfident, played way too many tables, played anyone and everyone HU or shorthanded at up to 2knl on my second site, and paid for it all dearly. I had the single worst stretch of variance I’ve ever experienced this year, which has been well-chronicled in this thread but in the end meant that I ran well over a hundred buyins & somewhere shy of 100k under ev all in all. I really, REALLY, REEEEAAAALLY didn't completely understand poker variance - even after playing millions of hands in my life. It seemed impossible at times, and I legitimately thought there was a chance that the software was somehow rigged against me. I had extreme and sometimes embarrassing emotional reactions this year because of it, which were immeasurably valuable in improving my emotional control in poker. I had huge stretches where my tilt (which I thought I was in control of at the time) was simmering and caused me to play poorly without even realizing it, and caused me to quit countless good games after losing just one or two buyins as a favorite, storming away in a complete fury @ the heavens.

But I dug my heels even further, and knew (in no small part because of the help and support of my friend Berri Sour) that if I improved both my game and my emotional control that the variance would eventually be a speed bump in the rearview mirror. I reached out in the study thread and found someone who wanted to begin a large study project using Pio Pro, and have learned a ton from that. We have also studied some other resources outside of Pio that have been really interesting and helpful. I made a bunch of other friends over the course of the year, guys who play 500+ who I can discuss hands with, and I’m really grateful for once again having a good poker circle. I'd especially like to shout out ninzent, who has helped me out in a lot of different ways, but also has become a good friend who I genuinely look forward to talking to on discord. It's funny, these online friendships, two people can live completely different lives, but find common ground and become friends. Beauty of the internet.

Lastly, I really tightened up my game to where I am completely confident in my game as it is, and will continue to stay vigilant of my edge on the pool and to not let myself slip into any bad habits, either mentally or in my game.

As the year has gone on, I’ve seen a lot of people give up, fall off, get discouraged, etc. In the end, all the struggles I had made me a lot better player, and I’m thankful for them. In terms of monetary success, although I made heaps in rakeback, I am not where I envisioned...but the player that I became because of it is worth way more than any amount I could have won this year.


3. My jiu jitsu is getting really good, fast. I would have been happy anywhere, but I took extra time to look around and find the best fighter’s gym in ATL, and I didn’t even grasp just how good it was until later. We’ve got the Lima brothers, Michael Graves, Anthony Rocco Martin, Mike Galitello, Paul & Sergio Ardila, Jordan Rinaldi, Clay Harvison, Quentin Rosenzweig…I feel real lucky to have such high level killers to learn from. Bjj is the highlight of my day, I just wish I would have gotten an earlier start as my 37 year old body can only take so much!

4. I’ve made it a goal to size up to be able to roll with whoever, so I’ve set on 210 as my goal weight. I walk at about 175 and have gotten up to 187 since August, with my macros @ 200g protein, 350g carbs, and 70-80g fat. My current schedule is lifting 2-3x a week with 3 bjj classes. I think another year or so and I’ll be there in size and strength.

5. Last but obviously not least, I got engaged to my best friend, and if all goes as planned we are going to start trying to have a kid sometime this year. It still feels a little surreal to me (I don’t know if that’s normal?) but we have an amazing relationship, hardly ever disagree, and communicate so effectively that it makes those feelings of “not being ready” manageable.

6. I lived and worked in Sweden, which was a great experience that I'll always remember.

7. I got to spend lots of time cultivating relationships that are important to me, with friends and family. Although I live a solitary existence most of the time in a social sense, I have a lot of close friends and I feel very lucky for this.

That's pretty much it. I'll figure out how I will go forward with this thread in the next couple weeks, and maybe start a new one to keep it fresh. I kind of like the idea of a once-or-twice-a-month format. I have a bunch of goals I want to implement in 2020 so I want to get those in order before I start the thread.

I hope everyone had a great end to the year and I really do appreciate people coming in here to post, and the friendships (even if they're digital) that we've made.

GL at the tables!!

Last edited by Oladipo; 01-03-2020 at 04:33 AM.
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Old 01-03-2020, 05:14 AM   #353
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

Seems like a great year and looks like you really got your live together to have quite an amazing 2020. I hope you had a great new year and wishing the best for you in 2020.
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Old 01-03-2020, 05:40 AM   #354
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

Feel you on the crazy emotional rollercoaster you've experienced this year, but you seem really humbled the whole thing - more often than not there is at least one good thing that comes out a hellish period of poker

Wishing you the best in 2020 and you got my one time for 100bi above ev! <3
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Old 01-03-2020, 06:03 AM   #355
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

Awesome read. Looking forward following you in 2020 best of luck
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Old 01-03-2020, 11:24 AM   #356
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

Congrats on another year sober man. Really inspiring to see how far you've climbed.
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Old 01-03-2020, 02:35 PM   #357
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

Congrats on a great and successful year both in poker and your personal life!
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Old 01-03-2020, 04:44 PM   #358
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

Nice way to end the year. Really enjoyed the write ups in this thread and looking forward to more. Best of luck next year
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Old 01-03-2020, 08:51 PM   #359
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

<3
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Old 01-04-2020, 09:42 AM   #360
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

Awesome stuff Matt, here's to running above EV in 2020!
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Old 01-06-2020, 06:16 PM   #361
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

My man! Way to finish the year off strong. Hope 2020 is great for you brother <3
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Old 01-06-2020, 10:43 PM   #362
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

Great read and great perspective/growth mindset wrt the troubles you faced. Best of luck this year
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Old 01-06-2020, 11:03 PM   #363
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

great read
gl this year
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Old 01-07-2020, 04:39 AM   #364
xmarxthespot22
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

So what was the Russian program thing? Do you think someone put some program on your pc to take advantage of you in poker ?
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Old 01-09-2020, 03:03 PM   #365
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

Quote:
In regards to the whole ignition topic that took over this thread, I just stopped posting because I said my 2 cents about it and it then spiraled into something completely out of control, with a lot of opinions that I didn’t agree with.
Looking back at the second to last message I wrote here, I want to quickly apologize to others in this thread for being unnecessarily harsh. That's not the kind of energy I am trying to put out into the world and I always regret it when I post angry stuff like that.

@Oladipo: Glad to hear you're heating up again. Your volume is admirable, as always. Good luck in 2020!
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Old 01-21-2020, 06:50 PM   #366
Oladipo
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brokenstars View Post
Seems like a great year and looks like you really got your live together to have quite an amazing 2020. I hope you had a great new year and wishing the best for you in 2020.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BenaBadBeat View Post
Feel you on the crazy emotional rollercoaster you've experienced this year, but you seem really humbled the whole thing - more often than not there is at least one good thing that comes out a hellish period of poker

Wishing you the best in 2020 and you got my one time for 100bi above ev! <3
Quote:
Originally Posted by QuiteBadTBH View Post
Awesome read. Looking forward following you in 2020 best of luck
Quote:
Originally Posted by weirdmonkey View Post
Congrats on another year sober man. Really inspiring to see how far you've climbed.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheTyman9 View Post
Congrats on a great and successful year both in poker and your personal life!
Quote:
Originally Posted by andees10 View Post
Nice way to end the year. Really enjoyed the write ups in this thread and looking forward to more. Best of luck next year
Quote:
Originally Posted by meale View Post
Awesome stuff Matt, here's to running above EV in 2020!
Quote:
Originally Posted by angeles View Post
My man! Way to finish the year off strong. Hope 2020 is great for you brother <3
Quote:
Originally Posted by d7o1d1s0 View Post
Great read and great perspective/growth mindset wrt the troubles you faced. Best of luck this year
Quote:
Originally Posted by max85 View Post
great read
gl this year
Thanks guys, back at y'all

Quote:
Originally Posted by xmarxthespot22 View Post
So what was the Russian program thing? Do you think someone put some program on your pc to take advantage of you in poker ?
Tbh I'll never know, and the most likely answer is probably not. But there was definitely something in Russian on my computer, that isn't there any more after reinstalling windows. Could obv be unrelated but I have been winning consistently after doing that

Quote:
Originally Posted by radiosick View Post
Looking back at the second to last message I wrote here, I want to quickly apologize to others in this thread for being unnecessarily harsh. That's not the kind of energy I am trying to put out into the world and I always regret it when I post angry stuff like that.

@Oladipo: Glad to hear you're heating up again. Your volume is admirable, as always. Good luck in 2020!
Ty man & no worries

1/21/2020



My monthly goal for 2020 is 15-20k/mo and I'm down some in little volume on my other site, so I'm posting in here mainly to re-motivate myself for the rest of the month. It's gone well despite some swings, but I've hit a tough stretch last 10k hands or so w/ infinite setups and opponents running insanely hot in 4b pots. I want to double down, make sure I'm playing A game, and grind out big volume the rest of the month.

Besides that, I went on one of the coolest trips in my life this weekend, fiancee and I went solo camping in Okeefenokee Swamp, the largest blackwater swamp in the US. Growing up I was always obsessed with swamps and deserts, so this has always been on my list. There is a very limited selection of 7 campsites to camp on deep in the swamp (on elevated wooden platforms) that you have to call and reserve through the park service. We spent 2 nights at 2 different sites and did around 30 miles of paddling in all. Saw countless gators (one of my fav animals), including a couple 12'-14' monsters, and just general breathtaking beauty. Place has a prehistoric feel, it's all cypress trees covered in spanish moss coming straight out of the black water, has a haunted vibe to it as well. On top of everything we were in complete isolation that deep in the swamp, just made for a special experience. Huge props to my fiancee, we had long days of paddling and she has a crippling phobia of snakes she had to deal with as well.

We were straight giddy throughout the entire trip, not much can compare with real adventure in the great outdoors.

All my good pics are on my camera and I can't find the cord today, but here are a couple from my phone. They don't do the place justice but you'll get the idea.

Campsite



Cypress ghosts



Our trusty steed



Some other shots







Everything else good, my bjj is improving every week and I'm really in a groove with it. Away from the grind I'm doing a large amount of poker studying which is a big part of why things are going as well as they are. 2020 will be a good year.

GL at the tables

Last edited by Oladipo; 01-21-2020 at 07:18 PM.
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Old 01-22-2020, 08:55 AM   #367
Dubnjoy000
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

It looks amazing GL in 2020, we can do this
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Old 01-23-2020, 10:41 PM   #368
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

GL 2020
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Old 01-26-2020, 01:50 AM   #369
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

Coming in a bit late here, but GL in 2020 Oladipo. I've checked out your thread here and there. Pretty awesome what you have going. I love what you said about finding the idea of defining yourself through your sobriety as repelling. As a fellow recovery person I can relate to that. Once free from substance abuse I'd rather do something with my life instead of sitting at meetings everyday and only shoot for staying sober. You are always welcome to PM me if you ever want to chat recovery. Despite not wanting to overdo 12-step meetings it is important to maintain that boundary between you a drink/drug by being willing to reach out when you need to. It's an act of humility and will save your ass. You seem like you are doing well now tho.

Congrats on getting engaged and plans to have a child. That it seems surreal seems normal to me since you guys have an amazing relationship. As a father to a 6 year old, what I would have done differently is been more prepared financially and with family and friends who could help with childcare/parenting.
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Old 01-26-2020, 06:02 AM   #370
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Place is def haunted, glad you guys got out of there alive
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Old 02-02-2020, 11:38 AM   #371
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It looks amazing GL in 2020, we can do this
ty sir!

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GL 2020
thanks man

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Coming in a bit late here, but GL in 2020 Oladipo. I've checked out your thread here and there. Pretty awesome what you have going. I love what you said about finding the idea of defining yourself through your sobriety as repelling. As a fellow recovery person I can relate to that. Once free from substance abuse I'd rather do something with my life instead of sitting at meetings everyday and only shoot for staying sober. You are always welcome to PM me if you ever want to chat recovery. Despite not wanting to overdo 12-step meetings it is important to maintain that boundary between you a drink/drug by being willing to reach out when you need to. It's an act of humility and will save your ass. You seem like you are doing well now tho.

Congrats on getting engaged and plans to have a child. That it seems surreal seems normal to me since you guys have an amazing relationship. As a father to a 6 year old, what I would have done differently is been more prepared financially and with family and friends who could help with childcare/parenting.
thanks and I agree with everything you said, also thanks for the advice. PM sent

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Place is def haunted, glad you guys got out of there alive
haha yeah I've always loved that kind of stuff so it was right up my alley

January 2020



POKER

My filter is a bit off as I did not play almost every day in January and am not up quite this much, but I had a good month. I got in 204 hours, which is good considering I took more "time" for myself than I did most months last year. I improved the most over the course of a month than I have during any other month in my poker career, hands down (~30hrs of study). I dropped my other site mid month after continuing to run like absolute trash there, I felt like I could never win and it was affecting my overall motivation, so I just stuck to ignition, especially because I wanted all my focus for the 1k games. I've got a good chunk there now @ 7evbb and I'm v confident in that pool. I've improved a ton this month and I might give it a shot there again soon, we will see. Ran like death this last week in great games.

As the time has progressed and I've started incorporating pio and serious study into my game, I realize just how relatively bad I was as late as Aug/Sept/Nov of last year. I prided myself on my ability to exploit ppl, but it turns out it wasn't even close to as effective as I thought I was, and since incorporating solid ranges and balanced postflop play into my game, I barely worry about exploiting specific players besides the obvious stuff. Shoutout to my poker circle (you know who you are) for helping me constantly improve.

I'm rly proud of the fact that any time I get stuck in a rut, even when it was an ev rut, I just focus on trying to make positive change in my game rather than letting it affect my volume.

LIFE

I was getting frustrated with myself because I have a hard time getting administrative stuff done, so I am taking an hour a day where I do whatever I need to do - clean, pay bills, etc.

Jiu jitsu still going great, my coach wanted me to compete this past weekend and after seeing who won it, I definitely would have taken my division. idk, I just feel I have nothing to prove at this point (37y/o, both ACL's repaired), I've done a lot of competing/fighting in my life, and also I don't want to push too hard and get injured. I know myself well and if I'm in a finals and the options are winning vs. letting my arm break, I'm letting the arm break, and I really try to take care of my body now.

I've been lifting 2-3x a week and training 2-3, I am really toast by the end of the week and it's actually been affecting my night time volume on fridays and saturdays. I am going to adjust it by hitting it hard M-T-W-T and tapering off on the weekends, will try this week and see how it goes.

I made a friend thru fiancee's school who is also in AA and he's been helping me to get into meetings more, he's also a cool dude so that has been good overall.

Feb should be a good month, heading to Denver upcoming weekend bc my fiancee got an internship there for the summer, so the company is sending her there for a weekend. I'll tag along and mostly grind, but my family is from that area, and as far as US cities go it's pretty high up on my list, so will do some showing her around since she's never been. Plan is mostly to just grind hard, I had a lot of distractions this month (fiancee's family here 1st part of the month, then she had a friend visit this whole weekend, also we have ongoing health problems with our cat)

Sure has been fun to watch zion lately, I was a huge fan in college and if he can stay healthy (I hope he loses some weight to take some pressure off his knees) he will be an all-timer. For today's game, not a sportsbettor but I'd surely take KC @ -1.5.

GL @ the tables girls

Last edited by Oladipo; 02-02-2020 at 12:05 PM.
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Old 02-02-2020, 01:41 PM   #372
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

Boom nice start to the year and time spent studying. Is this all 1k and 500 reg tables?
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Old 02-03-2020, 10:06 AM   #373
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

I'm pretty impressed that you can do 200+ hours a month + 30 hours study + jujitsu + lift 2-3x a week! Awesome!
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Old 02-03-2020, 10:10 AM   #374
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Amazing month and work ethic! Congrats
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Old 02-03-2020, 12:04 PM   #375
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Re: Success, Sobriety, and Financial Freedom: Out of Poker Retirement and back to Mid/Hi Stakes

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I'm pretty impressed that you can do 200+ hours a month + 30 hours study + jujitsu + lift 2-3x a week! Awesome!
Igualmente. It is pretty amazing that you manage all areas in seemingly complete balance while maintaining a healthy relationship with your girlfriend
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