I'd like to share a personal challenge I aim to conquer within the next five years: dedicating myself to poker. Unfortunately, I face a significant obstacle when it comes to bankroll management, and I struggle immensely with tilt. It's a common pattern for me: as I see my bankroll coming down, I become nervous, increase my stakes (hoping to recover more quickly – a grave mistake), and sometimes even venture into online blackjack, ending up losing everything. This time around, I want to take a different approach in my life, and for that, I'm starting this thread to seek help.

The idea is to post about the situations I encounter and share graphics that may contribute to my journey. A few months ago, I went through a divorce, which has been incredibly tough for me at 31 years old questioning it all:. I have a stable job that demands a lot of attention and brings me significant stress, but the pay is good.

I would appreciate any positive comments and would kindly ask to avoid hate.

Initial Bankroll: ~$350 USD
Starting Stake: NL25
Pokerstars.

Thank you.

Self improvement Is a gradual process but as long as you orientate yourself towards growth. Removing what is unnecessary like carving a marble statue.
Good Luck

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Hope you’re doing as well as you can be after the divorce.

Be aware that feelings from that will come and go and life tilt will occur when you’re at the tables and factor into overall tilt when you inevitably get hit by variance while playing.

Jumping stakes and playing pit games is extremely common when losing at your regular stake.

Be at peace with losing a few buy ins as a result from a days’ session. Easier said than done but you wont achieve what you want if you allow yourself to tilt and play C game or lower. GL

I'll just quickly reiterate what I mentioned in the first thread, make sure to use proper bankroll management if you've decided on having a separate bankroll for poker, that is not meant to go empty. A not too conservative strategy could be to take 5BI shots when you have 25BI for the next higher stake and move down once you hit 20BI.

If there's a way of banning yourself from online blackjack, use it.

Good luck!

GL Bluffer_Kid

Glgl

Updating.

The truth is, it has been difficult. The topic of my divorce has complicated my mind, and it has been hard for me to let go of negative thoughts and dedicate time to poker.
Also, having a 9 to 6 job drains the energy that I could otherwise use for poker.
This might sound like depression, but it's not. I feel strong overall, but I still feel a lot of sadness about what happened.

In terms of poker, I've fallen back into tilt once again, and increasing the stake (even playing NL100).

I'll try to play 10~12K hands in NL2 to demonstrate what I want to achieve, which is essentially beating the game.

Here's the graph:




Please help me navigating through a difficult time like this.

I also find it difficult to play properly after a long day's work.

Set a hard rule for yourself to play 10000 hands of 2NL before you can play anything else. And don't cheat. Report in this thread along the way.

Updating:

Hello everyone, I'm back. I've been much better personally regarding my divorce. I've managed to progress and understand certain past things that have helped me grow as a person.

Regarding poker, in the first days of March, I started playing NL2 - ZOOM on PS, but the truth is it didn't go well for me. I ended up going back to playing higher stakes and ended up losing the entire bankroll. I felt that in Zoom Poker, I couldn't find the game I was looking for, and without a doubt, it wasn't positive.

I'll detail the graph:




Now, I've switched to NL2-Regular Tables. The volume of hands is considerably lower, but it's much easier to make money. I felt that I had more control over my game.
The grieving period I had in the first days of my separation helped me a lot to now be calmer. I'll continue with poker, but I'm not having a good hand speed, as I have little time to play.


I reached the first 5100 hands in NL2 Regular Tables. Below, I'll detail the graph. Any comments are welcome.




As a recap:



Best regards.

Happy to hear you're feeling better re the divorce situation. Can't be easy.

I also enjoy playing regular tables more than fast fold tables, and it's not even close. Sure, it's nice to get new hands right away but I miss the table dynamic that develops when playing against the same opponents. Nice first 5k hands, keep it up!

Updating:

These past few weeks, I've been feeling much better and have managed to develop my game further in NL2. I've reached around 9,000 hands, and I feel like I've really mastered the level.

Although the last 2,000 hands have impacted my profit, it's because I started playing with a friend at those stakes, deviating a bit from my usual ranges.




Based on feeling more confident at these levels, I've made the decision to move up to NL5. I've already played around 1,600 hands at this level and I'm doing fine (I think):






I just wanted to take a moment to express my gratitude to all of you who have been following along with this journey. Your support means the world to me! I'm thrilled to receive any comments or feedback you might have. Let's keep the conversation going!

Thank you again,

Gl keep going, rooting for you.

Great hearing you're doing better! Nice results as well.

Keep grinding, champ!

Updating:

Since the last time I checked in on this forum, a lot has happened to me. The issues related to my divorce are really getting to me. These past two weeks, I've received comments and information that have really torn me apart internally. I'm feeling really low right now, and at the moment, I see more negatives than positives. I'm scared, sad, and feeling guilty.

I don't have much energy to maintain a volume of play as I would like, however, I believe this has helped me achieve a good win ratio. I've been playing NL5 and recently started on NL10 (2 tables per level). I feel comfortable in the game, and I see that I'm making a lot of progress.

This has been surprising for me because I've managed to be consistent in my decision-making. I hope you can continue to help me.

NL5 ~ 4,800 hands:





NL10 ~ 200 hands:



Any comments will be greatly appreciated. What do you recommend for me?

Thanks.