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Poker Goals & Challenges Post your threads logging your travels up the poker ladder as you achieve your poker goals and dreams. "Challenges" does NOT mean prop bets, wagers, etc.

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Old 07-02-2018, 11:00 PM   #201
Nerd e tron
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

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read through your entire thread over the last week or so. glad to hear how much things have improved for you since one year ago. wishing you the best going forward!
Thank you man! I appreciate it and am very happy I decided to do this journey. I know I haven't been having the results lately, but today I had 2 F2Ts, 3 FTs, and one win. Very happy I decided to do this haha

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Old 07-03-2018, 09:44 PM   #202
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

In case youíre wondering where yesterdayís score got me in the poker journey. A Canadian milestone I guess

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Old 07-04-2018, 07:04 PM   #203
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

Haven't played last two days, took yesterday off to have lunch with my mom and see cousins in town, took today off just in case my friends were going to the escape room in town tonight (we're not). Ended up using today to look into more poker gear. Tweaked my PT4 Hud a bit. Finally figured out how to see my all-in adj bb/100 to justify that I was actually running like **** for the last month and a bit (+10bb/100 btw). Also bought a subscription for Sharkscope. Once again, one of those things I should have bought a long time ago but will hopefully pay off now that I have it. I scoped myself and had a good time reminiscing on the poker up and downs of the last couple years. I think doing more of a deep dive into finding leaks will help me progress. From what I can tell, I think I'm crushing stakes <$5, doing okay up to $11 and anything above that I'm not doing so well. If I can start crushing the higher stakes, that would be great. I think I'm on the right track, just gotta trust the process
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Old 07-05-2018, 05:24 PM   #204
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

Where in Canada are you from?

And how has your experience been with coaching for profits?

Good luck!


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Old 07-05-2018, 10:29 PM   #205
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

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Where in Canada are you from?

And how has your experience been with coaching for profits?

Good luck!
Yo! Currently living in Saskatchewan. CFP has been good, obviously I have improved immensely since I started. That being said, 3am webinars every week is a bit of a bummer and some trouble contacting coaches at times have been annoying. On the poker end it has been good, but mixed results overall I'd say

Btw, shipped another tourney, super small one. I accidentally slowrolled the guy on the last hand. He shoved A2s preflop and I had aces but I had to get my phone so I could snapchat it. I felt like a dick but the poker gods didn't punish me, so all is good. Still lost money on the day but it could have been a lot worse haha

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Old 07-06-2018, 06:33 AM   #206
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

Had a good convo about staking with one of my coaches. Sounds like the play for now is for me to continue playing on my own and try to finish my contract before I run out of money. Once I finish my contract with BPC he can put me in contact with a stable which will give me good coaching and pay for me to play. Coach thinks I can beat stakes up to $30 which is nice to hear haha, he likes how engaged I am with the webinars, asking questions, hungry. If I end up getting staking I will get 50% of my profits that I win which is why it's ideal to wait until after the contract. If I'm still in BPC, I'll get nothing since 50% goes to the stable and the other 50% would go to BPC. If I get to the staking stage, I can then use my bankroll I currently have online to pay for life in the meantime. If I did that with my current bankroll, I would once again have 6+ months of money to live off of. In addition to that, I would hopefully be making money in the stables while being an advanced player playing higher stakes. Ideally I make enough that I can go off on my own and become an independent player crushing the online poker world.

Ideally. That's the plan. Gotta grind first and run good tho haha

Interesting thing. Coach told me that I shouldn't be playing hyper-turbos or most turbos. I have been playing all turbos up to $11 (my stakes), but apparently the expected ROI is much lower for the faster structure. So if I take most turbos and hyper-turbos out of my daily schedule, I will be playing less tournaments overall but I will also likely be within the 10-12 table sweet spot (as opposed to 14-table craziness). If I do that I should have a better ROI then, but I will be playing less tournaments at a slower pace. Something to think about. I think I'll still play several turbos, especially on Sundays, but trimming a few of them won't hurt. Time to get out there and crush it
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Old 07-07-2018, 01:34 AM   #207
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

Really cool thing happened tonight. I'm out at the lake to do laundry, skipping webinar tomorrow morning. Internet is absolute ****, but my favourite poker streamer IrEgption tweeted that he was having his freeroll tonight plus a heads-up vs viewers challenge. So I hopped in there, lost the freeroll, then hung around hoping to get drawn for the heads-up.

Pretty sure Twitch is the reason I started playing poker again. It started with Youtube stream highlights of Kevin Martin's I stumbled upon May of 2016. I started watching a bunch of those, eventually started watching his stream. I messaged in chat once I would sub once I got my BR to $500 and I did just that December 2017 hahahaha. Kevin was my intro to Twitch poker and my go to for a year, but I discovered Pat's stream like a year ago. I spent so many nights after work at Safeway watching his stream, eating ice cream, chips, pizza, whatever. I even played one of his freerolls while I was at work. The security guy working that night came over while I was "trimming" vegetables and told me to stop texting on my phone haha

I haven't played on Twitch or watched much of it since I started my poker journey just because I prioritized improving my own game. Made sure to hit Pat with a sub after my $5.50 Fish win. Anyways, I got drawn for the heads-up. Obviously it's super cool to play with someone I really looked up to poker-wise and be able to hold my own. I ended up losing, but he complimented me on my play which I really appreciated. Like I said, a cool moment haha

https://clips.twitch.tv/PleasantHonestHyenaPoooound
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Old 07-09-2018, 09:26 PM   #208
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro



I think I did very well today to win a couple hundred dollars. I had lots of cashes, several deep runs, and two FTs. I feel like reducing my amount of tournaments by cutting out turbos and hypers has allowed me to focus more on spots in-game, so I do actually feel better while playing. The runner up finish hopefully shows that.

I did well to place second on this table. I was one of the short or mid stacks the entire time and did well to navigate my way to a second. I also made my ballsiest bluff since beginning the poker journey, an FT bluff that in all reality won me several hundred dollars. Here's the hand.


partypoker - 300000/600000 NL (8 max) - Holdem - 6 players
Hand converted by PokerTracker 4

MP: 35.4 BB (VPIP: 21.43, PFR: 0.00, 3Bet Preflop: 0.00, Hands: 14)
CO: 24.16 BB (VPIP: 23.95, PFR: 15.19, 3Bet Preflop: 8.61, Hands: 530)
Hero (BTN): 33.15 BB
SB: 55.3 BB (VPIP: 28.89, PFR: 18.81, 3Bet Preflop: 8.51, Hands: 226)
BB: 44.87 BB (VPIP: 24.80, PFR: 16.94, 3Bet Preflop: 6.25, Hands: 128)
UTG: 32.78 BB (VPIP: 19.26, PFR: 10.37, 3Bet Preflop: 4.41, Hands: 137)

6 players post ante of 0.13 BB, SB posts SB 0.5 BB, BB posts BB 1 BB

Pre Flop: (pot: 2.25 BB) Hero has 7 Q

fold, fold, fold, Hero raises to 2 BB, fold, BB calls 1 BB

Flop: (5.25 BB, 2 players) 5 9 8
BB checks, Hero bets 1.58 BB, BB raises to 3.7 BB, Hero calls 2.12 BB

Turn: (12.65 BB, 2 players) K
BB bets 5.31 BB, Hero calls 5.31 BB

River: (23.27 BB, 2 players) 4
BB checks, Hero bets 22.02 BB and is all-in, fold

Hero wins 45.29 BB


Alright. So I open Q7dd on BU and BB defends. We see a flop where I have a gutshot and BDFD. I bet small, something I do almost 100% of the time. BB checkraises me small, something he has done once before on FT already. With all of my equity and the great pot odds, it's an easy call. Turn is Kd which gives me the additional flush draw equity. Villain bets again. With FD+SD, it is another easy call. River is a complete brick and villain checks.

In these scenarios I have a very, very hard time bluffing. I don't bluff enough and I don't take spots when they present themselves, often because I don't even see them. It's something I'm working to add more of to my game. Usually I would just check and lose, but I jam pot. I block the nut straight which I could theoretically have and my Q kicker also unblocks villain's Jx and Tx combos that might x/r flop with straightdraw equity. Maybe haha. Anyways, villain folds.

The difference in prize money between 6th and 2nd is almost $500 USD. I am so proud of how I played this hand and hopefully I can find and take my bluff spots in the future as well
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Old 07-10-2018, 07:48 PM   #209
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro



Looking after my friend's cat for the next few days. I thought we were bonding and then he hissed in my face. He is going to help me run some ICM calculations. Fish don't like him either
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Old 07-11-2018, 12:46 AM   #210
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

Trying to plan my next couple of weeks. It looks like a big poker stretch coming up, with Pokerstars MicroMillions starting this upcoming Monday. That is for two weeks and then Party has another week long Monster series which is even sicker, great events for my stakes. Ideally I could play all three weeks, have a couple deep runs, bink one or two tourneys (lol), and be on my way to my post-CFP playing career. I thought the same thing for SCOOP as well, so I’m not getting too ahead of myself haha. Especially on Pokerstars with what will be some absolutely massive fields, I’m not counting on winning any of these tournaments. It would just be nice

It’s a little complicated because it sounds like some of my friends are wanting to go to Calgary area start of next week to maybe hike/do other things for a day or two, and then my grandparents are rolling into town right after. I would love to just take a week off and do a bunch of stuff with everyone, but I need to play. I’m just trying to figure out what days to play and what days not to play

I will really only be missing some MicroMillions days. I’ve printed off the schedule and gone through it. Although there are some absolutely SICK prizepools/tourneys especially around 12:00 every day, a lot of the tourneys aren’t so life changing. They’re small buy-ins so I can play all of them, but a lot of them would only have a few k up top whereas SCOOP had some much meatier prizes. So maybe it’s not that big a deal if I miss three or four days of the first MicroMillions week. These friends are all leaving within the next two weeks for the rest of the summer, and who knows how many more times I’ll be able to hang with my grandparents. I’m prioritizing what’s important. At the end of the day poker will always be here, but these people won’t be. Here’s hoping the next couple of weeks are sick
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Old 07-12-2018, 12:30 AM   #211
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

I don’t know about you guys but I’m rooting for the Joe Cada Main Event repeat. I remember 2009 was the year that I really got into poker right after the spelling bee. That summer I bought a bunch of poker books, lost two doubloons in one day playing poker on Puzzle Pirates, and followed the entire Main Event coverage. Darvin Moon was the boss all tourney but Cada pulled it out. So funny to think that he was at the start of it. Go Cada go
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Old 07-12-2018, 02:40 PM   #212
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

https://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/2...ilers-1717124/

Heyo. I made a post about the insane AA vs KK vs KK Main Event FT bubble hand last night and why it was a bad call by Labat with KK. I was up till like 3 or 4 AM doing it, so no poker for me today. Gonna run through some hand histories and maybe look at BvB ranges today though. There are people messaging me about it in the thread asking questions or pointing out slight errors. I think I’ll probably be that guy that just drops it and leaves it. There were lots of different variables at play but overall I’m happy with my analysis. Gotta work on my own game now tho lol
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Old 07-13-2018, 12:40 AM   #213
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

Watching Main Event FT right now and I am disagreeing with almost everything the commentators are saying. I love Norman, Lon, and Antonio, but it really feels like they don’t know what they’re talking about. Probs because they don’t? Perhaps what I have learned is just different from what they know and both our views are valid. I would definitely say that the commentary is more rec, fun-player friendly.

Which is good. Biggest tournament of the year, you want it to be as appealing as possible for the most mainstream audience we get every year. Not every tournament gets on ESPN. If they’re talking about ICM all night long, that would be pretty boring for the average viewer. Funny to be at the level where the punny commentary doesn’t cut it for me anymore
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Old 07-13-2018, 01:56 AM   #214
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

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Originally Posted by Nerd e tron View Post
https://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/2...ilers-1717124/

Heyo. I made a post about the insane AA vs KK vs KK Main Event FT bubble hand last night and why it was a bad call by Labat with KK. I was up till like 3 or 4 AM doing it, so no poker for me today. Gonna run through some hand histories and maybe look at BvB ranges today though. There are people messaging me about it in the thread asking questions or pointing out slight errors. I think Iíll probably be that guy that just drops it and leaves it. There were lots of different variables at play but overall Iím happy with my analysis. Gotta work on my own game now tho lol
The thread got into a Doug Polk Youtube video. Does this mean that I finally made it?

Someone posted a link to the vid in the thread. Doug talked about there being chatter on the forums about the hand. When I saw my Pocket Pear avatar, I ****ing flipped haha. I havenít even watched the video yet or know how Doug probably tore my logic apart. Thatís just such a cool moment I never expected to have

I love all of these poker world firsts Iím hitting. First win, first withdrawal, first poker celebrity encounter, first poker streamer heads up, first Doug Polk vid. Itís super exciting stuff. And Iím not saying I will ever make it as big as I want to in poker, but my ambitions are bigger than just the game. I want to make money playing this game, but I want to do more than just make money. Iím not sure what that entails, but doing what Iím passionate about and working hard has already given me so many cool and rewarding moments. Just gotta keep on grinding
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Old 07-13-2018, 11:26 PM   #215
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

all the best bud, I'm following along your journey and I'm sure many are as well
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Old 07-15-2018, 01:45 AM   #216
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

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all the best bud, I'm following along your journey and I'm sure many are as well
Appreciate the support, thanks man

The final thing I want to say about the AA vs KK vs KK thread I made. I honestly regret the verbiage I used. "Terrible" is a pretty dickish way to describe a bad call that, in all honesty, is not that clear and most people (possibly including myself in-game) might not be able to fold. I'm okay with the analysis, I still believe it was a fold, I just regret sounding so sure and confident. As a player I should be striving to be uncertain. Yes, I can be sure, my logic can be sound, but I don't think I should ever want to be 100% in "this is the right play". If I think I know everything then I will stop growing, and I can't do that. We're all playing a game and it honestly makes me feel bad thinking that lots of people have seen it and maybe it even found it's way to Labat. What kind of ******* writes a thread about your call with kings being "terrible". It's not how I intended to come off, I got a little more animated in writing it just to spice up the thread a bit, but it was never my intention to talk down on him or anyone else for wanting to make that call. It's a sick spot. Oh well, not much I can do now haha

Saw a play at the local play festival tonight. I've never been before but I can call myself a playwright since I had a staged reading of something I wrote last year at UBC (all the playwriting kids did tho lol). God, it was an absolute trainwreck. Guy was dropping ****s and ****s and other starred out words and plenty of dick jokes and drug jokes and talking a mile a minute to stop the audience from having a breather to think "oh hey this really isn't that great."

Once again, I am ****ting on another person's art. I gotta give the guy props for doing it, but man was it cringe. Thankfully it was only a little over an hour. Crude language and crude material can be such a comedic crutch for so many people. I remember writing a hockey tv show pilot in my first year in the program and thinking it was pretty dope. Read it a little over a year later and it's not that funny, it's just crude. The stuff needs to be funny on it's own merit. F-bombs shouldn't be the basis of your comedy

Also, it straight up was not a play. It was a one man show with an elaborate set where he stood in one place and rambled while using a slideshow for visual assistance/gags. 10/10 not a play on a technical basis haha

Definitely tuned out mid-show to reminisce on my own staged reading last year. I remember I hated my piece, but I did super extensive rewrites like a week before the show and when it was performed it was actually kind of awesome. And I don't mean it in the "I'm awesome" sense. My favourite moments in that program were when we read scripts of mine out loud and you could just feel the emotions of the room change because of your story. That staged reading was "awe"-some because I could feel the emotions of that theatre shift and shape exactly the way I imagined when I was writing that play. And it's like "Hey, I did that." It was always an amazing experience whenever it happened

I wanna stay up and finish watching the Main but it's a big day tomorrow. Sunday Funday and then three days off to go camping. Hopefully I can crush it out there
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Old 07-16-2018, 04:11 PM   #217
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

Just passing through Calgary on our way to the mountains. I couldn’t find my phone for the first four hours of our trip, ended up being in the side pocket of my backpack. Checked through it and I got an email from the PartyPoker Live guy. They liked my article so I’m getting a $109 MTT ticket!!! Guess I’ll be using that this Sunday. Just bink a juicy tournament for $20k and then take it easy for a bit. Honestly, even a min cash would be soooo sick. V pumped
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Old 07-18-2018, 03:47 AM   #218
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

Heyo. Just updating from the tent while my friends are sleeping. This trip started as maybe a one day trip/hike at Grasslands National Park in Sask before becoming three days in the Rockies while doing some bigger hikes. Iím here because theyíre my friends, but I wasnít completely comfortable with the idea of hiking a mountain. Just an out of shape, scared of heights dude, I was pretty nervous about it

I probably should have said something earlier but we ended up hiking Yamnuska mountain. I guess in the grand scheme of hikes itís an intermediate difficulty run, but as a total newb I wasnít ready for it. I had my ****ty backpack I overpacked, just my normal Etnies sneakers, and I was just sweating an absolute bead. I brought like 5 bottles of water and you know I crushed all of them

We got there around 10AM and took a few hours to get past the ďeasyĒ part of the hike (straight uphill walking) to get to the rock scrambling part. Basically we scramble up the side of the mountain through a bunch of loose rocks with some trails there to follow. I guess we missed the trail marker we were supposed to take and just started scrambling up a super steep, super loose path we definitely werenít supposed to be on.

So Iím out of shape, dark clothes, plus 30 degrees Celsius, no shade, scared of heights, on the side of a mountain with what seems like a very steep and potentially lethal fall if I really **** up and the rocks below my feet and hands come loose and start rolling away.

I donít know what it is about the mountains. It seems like the further West I go from home, the more bad memories I have. I have bad memories associated with the town weíre in just from a cross-country road trip I did solo right before my life started falling apart. And I know people like the mountains, but for me being stuck between the mountain ranges and the trees makes me feel claustrophobic, like Iím being pushed down on, suffocated. I felt that way basically my whole time in Vancouver. Iíve kind of felt that way the whole time weíve been here.

And on the side of that mountain I obviously started thinking about walking across Granville and Burrard bridges that one night, looking for a high enough place to jump off and kill myself. And itís a really bad time to have that stuck in my head, bringing up the rear of my friends who are all having a great time. But thereís three reasons in my head why the situations were similar. First, I didnít feel safe. Second, I felt like I didnít have control of the situation. And third, one wrong step and itís over. So it didnít feel that different and that moment just started playing in my head

Eventually we got to the right proper trail, shimmying across some very loose, unstable rocks. I took much longer than everyone else to get off the side of that mountain. When it came time to keep moving up the mountain, I didnít. I said, ďI donít feel well.Ē I blamed my fear of heights, which was a partial truth. I told them I wasnít going any higher.

I didnít want to be that guy raining the fun on their parade, but I kind of had to. They left me with a sandwich and watrbottle and finished hiking to the top (which was only a few more minutes/metres up). I sat in the sun, leaned back against the slope, and waited for them to come back down. It took us an hour to get back to the easy hike/stable ground part after the rock scrambling bit. When we made it, I just kept my eyes on my feet and didnít do much appreciation of the view.

I felt bad about it but not that bad. It sucks I had a bit of a breakdown on the side of a mountain, but it happens. On the way down my one friend asked me if I was dizzy, and I told him it was moreso just stuff in my head, bad stuff. He read my mental health article and he understood. Sometimes I think he hangs out with me because he thinks Iím lonely, but thatís what good Christian kids do. Itís been really nice reconnecting with him

So yeah. The rest of the night was good, the rest of the trip was good. I got off of the mountain after six hours so all is good and safe and on level ground and will be for the foreseeable future. I literally took no pictures because everyone else took hundreds. Maybe if I get my hands on a few I can post them. Bsck home tomorrow, get to see the grandparents, and first day back at the tables shortly thereafter. See ya
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Old 07-20-2018, 03:45 PM   #219
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

Played yesterday and didnít lose too much money which is fine by me. That will be my only day I play this week until Sunday. Grandparents are taking off Sunday afternoon and Iím just hanging around the lake until Saturday night, enjoying the food and the company and the games.

As Iím sure I mentioned previously, when the grandparents come we usually end up playing canasta. So far I am undefeated, 3-0. They taught me and my Dad a new canasta variant called Hand and Foot which I really enjoyed, five-deck mayhem. Iíve been coming up clutch constantly, playing concealed hands, making a black canasta with 4 Kings so I can pick up the deck with the two I kept in my hand. It makes me wonder what the skill level for canasta is like. I feel like there shouldnít be much that separates winners and losers beyond what cards they are dealt, but there is strategy in how you manage your hand and play them. I feel like Iím a pretty good canasta player, but maybe I just play with bad players. Not too sure what the peak of canasta skill is, but as a game itís very different from poker considering variance lets everyone win at poker some of the time. If you suck at canasta, youíre kinda screwed

Couple more days of cards for fun and then I can get on the cards for money grind. See ya
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Old 07-22-2018, 02:37 AM   #220
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

Heyo. I am back in town ready for the grind of the upcoming two weeks. Hopefully I can play all but maybe one or two days, days I will hopefully use to get moved into and have my new place set-up before I move in unlike last time.

Interesting thing happened last night. Me and my ex talked for the first time since that November night, breakdown number one I guess. I posted a snapchat story of my sister's cat stuck in a box and me trying to help him out as he tried to bite me. She messaged to say that "I love him" -> meaning the cat. We are both cat people haha

The first thing I said was that I was sorry to hear about her loss. Her cat passed away recently and she was so beautiful. 10/10 lovey dovey for sure. Interesting that the whole dead cat thing was a catalyst for both of our last conversations. It'd be nice if pets never died, but that's life I guess.

She was drunk at a party apparently, her typo game was pretty active. We talked about her life a bit. She's been having a rough go, some of which I was aware of, some of which I wasn't. We talked about my life too a bit, just about how I'm not broke yet and that I'm doing a lot better than I was. She never responded or liked my mental health article when I wrote it so I wasn't sure she had read it, but I guess she had. She probably felt bad if she thought that she was a cause of a lot of the hardships I've had, which is partially true. A lot of the hardships I had started with her, it evolved into self-hatred, and lately it's come into a stage where remnants of that hatred and memories that haunt me are what's doing damage. A lot of it started with her, but I'm kind of at a point where it's not about her anymore

Which I thought was interesting. I had a friend who told me I needed to stop talking/thinking about/looking at anything to do with my ex because she was like crack for me. Which was true. I was very obsessive over her and it really hindered me moving on with my life.

I kind of felt it at the time, but I feel like that November night kind of broke the spell for me. I remember even though she had her part the night before, the entire situation and the solution felt separate from her. After that I didn't think about her the same way as I had. I still want her to be happy, I don't think of her as a bad person, but I really think I've moved on from her which is good. I'm happy about that.

Here are some golden oldie snaps from one of my drunken degen nights final year of university. The first is in the basement of Fortune in Vancouver, totally wasted



The second is from six hours later. Once again, likely wasted and definitely falling asleep at the table. I'm pretty sure I won that night, but I can guarantee I won less than $200. RIP Edgewater lol



The very next day was my first at counselling. Yeah, poker/drinking/ex/depression were a pretty bad mix lol. Goodnight and good luck on the Sunday grind everyone

Last edited by Nerd e tron; 07-22-2018 at 02:57 AM.
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Old 07-25-2018, 09:02 PM   #221
Nerd e tron
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

Moving into the apartment my parents are hooking me up with this Friday, Iíve already begun moving over some smaller boxes. Itís not too far from my old place, maybe four or five blocks, but itís nicer, has air conditioning, itís own laundry machines, and a ****ing dishwasher for $200 less than my current place. Itís bottom floor though so I canít walk around in my underwear because windows

The poker results havenít been there since the Deepstack runner-up, Iím basically breakeven since my $5.50 Big Fish win. I had a couple really sick runs yesterday and Iím starting to get some decent finishes in my $11-$22 tournaments but no binks or FTs yet. If I get one of those, I can finish my contract and move on to the post BPC life. I donít have a lot going on at the moment so Iíll have plenty of time for poker the next several weeks.

Off the felt, I went out of my way a couple days ago to thank a friend in town just for being a good friend since Iíve been back. It had been on my mind for a while and having someone to chill with without getting high or getting drunk or being surrounded by people who arenít sober was something I really appreciated. Theyíve left town for the rest of the summer and the situation will be different when they come back around, but itís been a good run. It was still really hard to thank them properly just because we had never really talked much about my mental problems (although they were aware of them). I have to tell myself itís okay to open up about stuff and itís okay to say good things to other people. My entire life I was always the kid that never talked. Iím not trying to become a chatterbox, but letting more people in and be able to support me has done nothing but good, so Iím glad I did it. Hopefully I can get a MicroMillions win tomorrow before the big moving day. See ya
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Old 07-26-2018, 11:54 PM   #222
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

Ended up moving today. My plans were to take Friday off to move and Mom said sheíd bring in the car to use, but my Dad decided to do it tonight. Had to cut my day in half to make myself available for the end of the day, although my Dad canít seem to wrap his head around the fact I canít just get up and leave a poker tourney unless I want to set my money on fire. So it was a short day, no FTs or anything. From the time my Dad came to my place to when we brought the trailer back to my apartment, he was just yelling at me basically. Iím wasting his time, Iím wasting his money, youíre inconveniencing everyone, get a job, youíre addicted to gambling and thatís why you want to play poker every day, etc etc. It is so goddamn annoying

He was giving me a hard time up until we got back to my place with the trailer and my friend was there to help move. Then the smile came back, we got everything out of my current place and into the new one, maybe took a little over an hour total. Super smooth

First thing I told my friend when we drove over just me and him to my new place: ďMy dad is such a ****ing ***hole.Ē This is the one friend that really looked up to me for doing poker, for just going for it, for not just being another person going nowhere in Swift. I donít have friends that are really opponents of what I am doing, but of everyone in my support group he is the one that understands what Iím doing the most

So then he starts to open up his ears and listen to all of the passive aggressive swipes my parents, usually my Dad, take at me. We went for supper afterwards. At supper, my Dad makes a point of telling me the waitress is an addictions counsellor and I should talk to her. He points out that my mom said that I ďplayĒ cards and that I donít ďworkĒ cards. He tries telling me that if I only play five tournaments at my best then he is probably doing me a favour by cutting my poker days short. I say that even if I have a 100% ROI in those five tournaments, I will be making less money playing five than if I play thirty tournaments with a 30% ROI - my point? Volume matters - Dad just looks at Mom and asks if she heard what I said, and she only says ďI wasnít listeningĒ

Afterwards I get my friend to drive me home, and he spends the entire time laughing his ass off. Because he GETS it. That supper was awkward as **** for him, he disagreed with basically everything my Dad said, he knows Iím not addicted to gambling, etc etc. No one else has been that privy to my parentís poker opposition, but he got a full night of it and now he understands the kind of support I get from them

Iím not saying any of this because I like trash talking my Dad or my Mom. There is simply healthy criticism and pointless criticism. There is reason and there is paranoia. There is ďthisĒ and there is ďthatĒ and my parents are always in the camp of ďthatĒ and I just have to nod my head and take it and in the back of my mind say ď**** youĒ because they have nothing worth saying to me that I should listen to. I shouldnít say nothing. Mostly nothing. Certainly nothing poker related

So that was fun. I donít have internet at my new place until the first so Iím playing poker at the old place until the Sasktel guys come again. I left my computer desk at my old place and you bet I heard about it from my Dad for twenty minutes even though itís a foldable desk I can take apart that will easily fit in the back of my car. But heís not really a reasonable person. If you try and reason with him, he only gets mad because youíre saying heís wrong. How can people be so thick headed? My dadís not the only one, theyíre out there all over the place, and I think thatís honestly kind of sad. Since we did all the moving tonight I can keep on playing tomorrow. So, the grind continues. See ya
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Old 07-27-2018, 12:11 AM   #223
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

That's tough man. Didn't you say that your dad has/had issues with gambling? It would be kinda of hypocritical of him if that were the case...
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Old 07-27-2018, 02:06 AM   #224
Nerd e tron
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dubnjoy000 View Post
That's tough man. Didn't you say that your dad has/had issues with gambling? It would be kinda of hypocritical of him if that were the case...
To be fair, when he mentioned our waitress was an addictions counsellor, he jokingly said that he should talk to her too which made my Mom laugh. My dad is hypocritical often. For example, heís a terrible backseat driver, will berate you for driving 10km over the speed limit on the highway. But when heís driving heís doing 135km/h while texting because heís a ďgood driverĒ

He definitely has had gambling issues but I think he has been doing better about it in recent months. Iím honestly much more worried for him than I am for myself. So he can talk high and mighty about anything he wants, but it loses itís effectiveness when he contradicts his own words on the regular. I love him, but he is a frustrating person sometimes
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Old 07-27-2018, 02:49 AM   #225
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Re: Quitting Safeway to try and go pro

I will say this about the current living situation: it’s an amazing apartment for an amazing price. My parents own this apartment and they are giving me a discount to live here. For $200 less per month I am willing to see my parents more often and put up with their ****. I love my parents as I’ve said many times. But if I see them every day and every day they are telling me to get a job and stop playing poker, I would much rather move out than deal with that toxic garbage. I don’t think it will come to that, but I am only saying if it does. My Dad gave me **** today because they could be renting this place out for a couple hundred bucks more to a stranger than they are renting it to me. Great. That’s great. What am I supposed to say to that?

I never came up to them and asked to live at their apartment for a discount, they offered it to me. I never demanded they let me use one of the cars sitting around the house, they lent it to me. I never asked for them to pay for my university, they told me I was going and there was no saying no. My Dad seems to be under the impression that I owe him, that I am spitting on his face for playing poker and not doing what I went to school for (which, I daresay, would be much more bleak financially than poker). And I want to say that I owe them nothing. I did not ask for these things, they were given to me. And yes, I am going to use these things because it’s in my best interests right now. I understand what my parents have done for me, I understand the financial strain us kids have put on them, but I did not ask for anything. It was given to us, and I will not tolerate being made a doormat for my Dad when I wasn’t the one making the decisions.

Yes, I am using their car. Yes, they buy me dinner maybe once a week. But for the last five months I have been paying 100% of my own rent, bills, and groceries, and I didn’t ask them for help paying any of that because I didn’t need it. I’m not going to let myself go broke because I’m not a ****ing idiot. If I need to get a job, I’ll get a job. If poker isn’t working, I’ll stop playing poker. I’ll do what I need to do to live, but I don’t owe them my servitude because of what they gave me. Every day I’m grateful, but I’m my own person, living my own life, trying to be happy in the way that I want to be. If they decide to constantly criticize me and I can’t avoid them, I’ll pay more to leave and go somewhere else. I don’t need that negativity, I don’t want that negativity, and that’s that.
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