Hey all!

I'm relatively new to Two Plus Two, and have been playing poker for about a year and a half. Playing live, I have definitely lost money, somewhere in the vicinity of 2-3k. These nights playing live were often when I was drunk and really wanted to throw money away and just lose (these were dark, very sad days for myself). It didn't help that I was a genuine beginner a year and a half ago, and it has only been in the last few months where I feel like I am actually taking strides to being a better poker player.

In terms of online, I am actually a small winner!!! I've only put $100 USD online (one deposit) in August 2016, and my bankroll at the moment is about $320 USD. I was breakeven for basically the first year, and most of my profit has come in the last two months, making some deeper runs in small stakes MTTs and a little cash game success as well. I'm proud of how I've managed my bankroll online and refrained from putting my roll in mortal danger. To be a beginner player and not bust for over 14 months is exciting for me.

As the title says, I am currently working at Safeway making minimum wage. My last day of work is a week and a half from now. I am currently living in Vancouver (I'm a recent graduate), but will be moving back home to Saskatchewan in the next month or so, where life will be much cheaper.

I have decided that I want to give professional poker a shot. For the last year and a half, poker has been the one constant passion in my life. In some truly dark days (days made darker by poker sometimes), the dream of being a professional was something for me to strive towards.

I know for a fact that I have not given poker my 110% attention. First, I was a full time university student. After, I became a full time Safeway employee with **** hours. Across both of that, a general depression and lack of desire for anything really hampered my ability to focus whatsoever.

Right now, I feel mentally ready for this challenge. I have read some poker books over the last few weeks, which are already showing results. I am working on learning more concepts of the game. I am a smart guy (at least, I was formerly a smart kid), and I know that when I apply myself, I can accomplish great things.

Poker is something I have to try, and this is the perfect time in my life to take that shot. I have about 13k saved up. Using that to cover basic expenses when I move back home, i figure that I will easily have 6+ months where I can focus solely on poker. I want to grind up my $320 USD bankroll into something I can sustain myself on as a poker pro. Beyond that, maybe I can move up the stakes and become one of the better poker players in the world. I need to give poker a shot, because it is the one thing in life right now that I am honestly excited about. If I don't give my best effort, I know I will regret it for the rest of my life, always asking myself "what if."

If I fail, that's okay. If I can't improve and build my bankroll, and my savings dwindle until I need to get another job, that's okay. I have promising prospects elsewhere, particularly in screenwriting. At worst, I will leave this challenge broke with a ton of great research and inspiration to mine stories from. At best, poker as a living will become a reality. If things go really well, maybe I can have the best of both worlds. Who knows?

Like I said, I'm new to Two Plus Two. I guess I can keep posting on this thread as I continue my journey. There should be some juicy stuff, including a poker short film I'm pitching in a few weeks and some trepidation about what my parents will think when I tell them my plans. Most of all, this is about trying to do something I will love doing for the rest of my life. I'll try and chronicle the ups and downs, and hopefully I can make this journey work

Feel free! Any tips or feedback you have on this crazy plan, bankroll management, where i should start studying to improve the quickest, etc. I'm all ears

$13k save up? Do you buy insurans, car loan? monthly food expenses etc?

with 13k you can safely grind 1/2 with 5000bb, put 3k for your life expenses

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I could, at same time tho my grasp of the game is not what it should be right now. If I move up stakes too fast, I'm afraid I might bust. I might allocate some of my money to have a bigger bankroll, but I think it's important that I build it up thru playing poker and testing my ability

How far is it from your home to the casino? I'd seriously recommend live poker with your bankroll. You can easily make $20/hr at 1/2 live.

Don't do it

Right now it's like an hour bus ride. When I move back home, the casino won't be an option just because of how small the city is. I think i'm just gonna grind online. If I have success, I can always move to a bigger city. Even though I've lost money playing live, I can definitely tell that it's softer. I'm just not comfortable putting all of my money at risk when I feel like my game is not strong enough to justify playing that big of stakes yet. If I learn to crush online, I think that live will be that much easier. Just gonna try step by step

Honestly dude just start by doing poker part time. Get like 25 hours a week somewhere and play outside of that.

The thing that most people don't understand is that poker is a sport that takes a lot of control. By you quitting your job to pursue poker, that shows that you have very little control. Anyone can make it in poker. Anyone can grind out a small profit, but it takes the great players discipline and ability to seek out fish to be able to make a massive profit. Being able to call someone down with Ace high and be right, or being able to bluff someone off because youve seen him lay down a good hand before. This is the skills that make a great poker player. I see a lot of people come and go on here saying that they want to be a pro. Thats not how it works.

By binking one tournament, you life will change, ever. But we see ME champ like peter eastgate or jamie gold disappears from poker circuit few years back, since then...

Not everyone can be poker enthusiast like Phil hellmuth or daniel himself

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Online takes massive patience. I've been grinding micro mtts sometimes u play 15+ mtts per day for a week+ consecutively still unable to bink FT because of variance.

Live 1/2 is way softer than 5NL 6 max online. Go figure it out

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You have experienced a little bit of positive variance - do not be suckered into thinking your game has necessarily improved, maybe it has, but any serious player is well aware of the old adage

When I'm winning I think I'm better than I am; when I'm losing I think I'm worse than I am.

Be aware if the (cash game) books you have read are older than 2-3 years, they will damage, not improve, your online cash game.

The best advice anyone can give (after they have told you not to do it, and you have ignored them) is to tell to sign up to some of the pgcs of people that have gone down this road.

You will soon learn becoming an online grinder requires 100% dedication and an absolute shedload of studying. It's not just learning the basics, you gonna need to get into software like Snowie and PIOsolver, to name but a few. It is pretty much a fact that anybody who has the IQ and dedication to succeed as an online grinder, could make a success out of any number of alternative careers.

GL, will watch

I would avoid live if you want to learn and progress your game, and overall have a better chance to succeed at your goals. Too many live players think they can make it long term because of 25 hand per hour short term variance that can last months. It has ruined a lot of casual players lives.

If you want a chance at making this work, you have to put everything you have into studying and learning and gaining experience. Online with more hands per hour and less bankroll risk is the only way to do it.

You have a long road ahead of you and the odds are stacked against you but that's basically life, not just poker. If you have the life roll funds and the time/commitment to put into it, then there's nothing wrong with wanting to take that shot. you just have to understand and accept the real possibility of the worst case scenario, or scenarios below what your goals would deem acceptable.

If I were you, I don't see anything wrong with going home, living a very cheap and modest month to month lifestyle, but maybe finding something part time to supplement. Nothing wrong with working 8-24 hours a week, picking up odd jobs or just doing whatever is available to you to cover some of your monthly expenses. 8 Hours a week at min wage can cover groceries or rent for a month while still leaving ample time throughout the week and weekend to study and grind.


GL! You seem to have a bit better understanding of what you're getting into than most who come here and make these types of threads. From one Canadian to another, I hope things work out positively for you!

Thanks for all the feedback guys! Definitely going to try studying my ass off. Part-time 8-24 hour per week job could be an option. I might be full time poker until April, and then I can get a part time job at one of the local golf courses. I should be far enough along the journey that I'll have an idea whether poker is possible for me or not. Free golf and a little extra money would be dope tho

So, bit of a wishy washy session today. Booked a small loss in tourneys, booked a smaller win at cash, lost a buck or two on the day. Nothing crazy.

I'm currently reading Harrington on Cash Vol. 1. Even tho it is outdated, I still feel like I'm getting better for reading it as I see some results in cash games and also just feel small strides in my overall game.

I'm thinking about possibly doing an online course or getting coaching tho. I might take the Raise Your Edge MTT Apprentice course. It will cost about $700 of my $13k, but the whole idea is that it will accelerate my growth as a player and make me exponentially more money in the future. I think it could be a good investment, so I might buy it once my Safeway days are done for good.

Any suggestions on good coaching/courses/poker training sites???

Decided to try out BPC MTT Bronze coaching for profits instead. More for beginner players, and coaching sessions rather than doing everything on my own. Looking forward to studying the right way and putting in the work!

So I just told my parents about my plans. My dad is supportive and understanding about it, which I expected, and my mom is completely devastated and terrified, which I also expected. I spent the first ten minutes of my call with mom before she gave the phone to my dad to talk for the next forty minutes.

My dad has had gambling issues in the past, and I knew that this was going to upset her. Obviously, there's no way I'll be able to convince her that poker isn't like other gambling. I won't be able to convince her that it's not like roulette or craps, and that correct bankroll management is going to make this a possibility for me. For her, gambling is gambling. End of story.

Only way she'll change her mind or even try to understand is if I can show a consistent profit playing this game. Time to hit the books, I guess

Yo! Quick update, since I haven't been around for a bit.

Things are in motion. Soon I'll be moving back home, and I've been pretty open and honest about trying poker. Even though initial reaction was bad, I think it has improved and will get better over time.

As far as my game has come, I'm currently doing the BPC MTT Bronze course. I'm about halfway through the actual course material, and then I still have to go through to other courses before I can begin playing. I dawdled for a while as I finished my job and took a little time to cool off, but I've made steps in the last couple of days to consistently study and I've powered through a lot of the material in the last couple of days. I already feel like I'm learning a lot, so I'm excited to hit the tables.

Right now, there's a lot of poker software I think I need to be downloading and buying subscriptions for. It'd be nice if they had a list so I knew exactly what version of what **** I should be buying, but I guess not everything in life can be served on a silver platter. Things are looking up, and I'm excited to see how the poker journey continues

Nothing like a mental breakdown to remind you why you're doing this.

I saw my ex for what will likely be the last time yesterday. She's been the source of a lot of the hardship I've experienced over the last two and a half years.She's a good person though. She told me to say hi to my cat for her, and I said I would. And then I remembered that my cat died two months ago, and I remembered what I'm not coming home to, and all of this other stuff that was just under the surface came up and...

Not a great night. That's why I need to leave Vancouver though. This city feels like acid. And that's probably not good for anyone's mental health.

On the poker side of things, there is good news! I finished my course on Saturday and got to play my first mini-session on Sunday. Two tournaments, two cashes!!!

Even though it is very early in my poker journey, I can already tell that I am a far superior player to what I was when I started this thread. Even though people think I'm crazy, and even though I know it's not a given, I really do believe in myself. I know I can do this, and I am committed to working my ass off to make this a reality.

I'm sure the 203% ROI will hold haha

Guess I got a little ahead of myself. I'll be here for four more weeks.

I really could have saved that breakdown for another day, or another night, or something I guess.

Hey. Here's some results from day two. In case you thought day one was a fluke.

[IMG][/IMG]

So I went for breakdown number two tonight. Breakdown number two involved walking to a park a few blocks away, slapping myself, blood pumping in my head, and a walk down to the ocean where I thought about swimming into the bay. The water was really cold. I only went up to my ankles, and then my feet went numb while I talked to some chick on the suicide hotline.

So yeah. Not the best night.

All to find out that my dad actually is coming to get me this weekend. So that fuss was all about a lot of nothing.

But it wasn't really about nothing. That's the craziest thing I've done in a few months, but it had it's reasons. If you're wondering why I'm not writing at the moment, just ask yourself if you'd want to create material from what's going on in my head. It's not fun. Trust me.

So, here's the number I called. It's the British Columbia Province-Wide Crisis line. In case that's where you live, and you need to talk to someone.

1-800-(SUICIDE) 1-800-784-2433

Yeah, it's very clever. And in case you're in a blood rage, don't do what I did and listen to this song at max volume. Pretty sure it didn't help.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mtn...=RD6mtn1YWyJas

It feels better when I talk about it. Here's hoping that was the last time that happens. And hopefully the poker run good continues tomorrow lol

Currently in Kamloops BC on my way back home. The Coquihala highway was insane, absolute **** weather but didn’t end up in the ditch, so that’s always a big victory.

Still can’t get over Wednesday night. That all happened so fast, out of nowhere. I’ve thought about killing myself before, but I’ve never felt in danger of actually doing it. Until that night. I was standing right there, and I wanted it so bad.

Thankfully I was able to talk to a friend about what happened, and it really made a horrible night a weirdly special one. I’m glad to be leaving Vancouver, but I am going to really miss her. Hopefully I’ll see her in the future again, maybe when i’m a poker millionaire.

I’ll be home tomorrow or the day after. Need to set everything up, get settled back in, and I can start the grind in earnest. I quit Safeway to do this. I quit writing to do this. I left Vancouver to do this. It’s all about finding something that I can love doing for the rest of my life. Looking forward to really putting myself to the test. Soon

Hey all! Life back in Saskatchewan is everything I hoped it would be. Boring, but beautiful. I’ve caught myself smiling a lot in the last couple of days. It’s good to be back around family and good friends. Saskatchewan sunsets are my favourite too. Lately they’ve reminded me of pulp-free, sweet orange juice. Minute Maid, y’know?

So I’ve played about 25 hours since I’ve been back, three full days of grinding. I am in the positive since beginning my poker journey following my BPC course, but just barely. I’ve had a few deep runs into some Stars tourneys, but no FTs yet or super big cashes. Need to study more, work on my lines and ranges. Need to internalize it so I can externalize quality poker play at the tables.

Had a few hiccups getting settled back in, facing some friction from the fam for what I’ve decided to do. I ended up talking with my mom about that crazy night in Vancouver, plus about a lot of what was going on in the last couple of years. I think that she’s coming around to what I’m doing. It’s okay if she doesn’t fully support it, just as long as I don’t get shade thrown at me constantly lol

I’m gonna be living with my parents outside of town until the end of December. Looking to move into a room in the city for early January. We live half an hour from anywhere and the wifi is pretty spotty. I had to deal with a lot of disconnects in the first couple hours of my Sunday grind today. Pro tip: unplug the router, then plug it back in.

More and more, I know that this was the right choice for me. Now I just need to make the dream happen. A lot of work to do yet

Cheering and praying for ya man. Kick the poker world in the teeth. Keep studying and keep your dream out in front of you. I hope you find a few good, positive people that have the same goals you do. It will help in the highs and lows that you will experience in poker and in life. If ya ever need a word of encouragement shoot me a message. Not on here every day but often.

Appreciate it man! 👌🏻👍🏻

Bankroll took a big hit yesterday. I played 19 tournaments and only cashed 2. Of course, they were two of my smallest buy in tourneys. Lost somewhere in the neighbourhood of $60 #feelsbadman

So I just deposited $500 across my Stars and Party accounts. I had to buy a prepaid Mastercard at 7/11 to do it, since my cards won't accept transactions on the poker sites. When I told the lady I wanted $500, she asked, "Doing online shopping?"

"Oh yeah," I said.

This was always the plan, as my bankroll was too small on the sites anyways. My coach told me I could play up to $5 tourneys with the bankroll I was planning. Working with BPC, it's kinda weird because they're based in Europe. So I'm depositing with Canadian money, using it as US Dollars on the sites, and recording my profits and losses in Euros. A tangle of conversion rates, but my bankroll online is about $520 euros.

After yesterday, I might play a little lower tomorrow just to ease back into it. The biggest tourneys I was playing before the program were honestly $2. Easy to see how fast your roll shrinks when you whiff all the big ones.

Of course, that wasn't my record loss on one day. I spent my birthday this October at the River Rock in Richmond, playing $1/$3 with a bunch of strangers. I didn't hang out with anyone because I didn't have anyone. Four hours after I sat down, I left with a profit of $156. Two days later, I came back to the same seat at the same table against the same players and lost $400. I played bad, but not that bad. My KK got cracked twice in an hour, and that'll blow a lot of money.

I feel this loss more than that $400 though, and more than a lot of the $300 buy ins I was blasting off with drunk all of last year. I guess it's just the fact that I am actually doing this poker thing. This is my career choice for now, so to face these losses at the start makes me ask all of the questions of whether I can actually do this. Were those losses variance? Were they bad play? Am I just ****ing crazy?

At the end of the day, this is just a bump on the road. This road isn't guaranteed to end at the ****in' Mirage, and I am well aware of that. I'm doubtful, but that's just my nature. Never trust it will happen until it does. Hopefully it just happens faster