So I did end up golfing today! There are two main guys I played with both last year and now this year where I played with them both every round in 2020. The guy that was my main contact couldn't make it today though so it was me and the other guy alone together for the first time. It feels like this year we've chatted a bit more than in 2019 so I can say I like playing with him. He has my number now so I have two golf contacts that can hit me up for a round. Besides us we played with two other guys. One was a thirty-something young guy who could hit the ball a mile when he didn't duck hook it into the bush. The other guy was maybe early sixties. I thought at first he was just a friendly old man before he was taking some hoots on the second hole and doing your typical old stoner routine. For some reason I had never really known older guys that smoked weed but a lot of the guys in this crowd seem to partake lol.

Anyways, the games were the usual greenies and snake even without the snake which was in our absent ringleader's bag at home lol. As opposed to last round we all three putted a few times. I three-putt parred the par-five 10th hole to get the snake but managed to shed it on #13 and never looked back. For greenies I won the first one and lost the next two. The secondary main I usually play with had a chance for the fourth greenie on #15 but managed to three-putt. That means he had to pay everyone two bucks instead of us paying him and there was a double greenie carryover to #17 worth $12. He managed to recover and hit a shot to about thirty feet but then I stepped up and hit a pure 4-iron 180 yards into a slight headwind and stuck it to about 16 feet. Needing to two putt for the double greenie I curled a dying putt inside the right edge of the cup for the birdie. It was sexy af. Still double-bogeyed the last to make a pretty meh 81 on the day but I cleaned up pretty good in the betting department. For where I was last round...

Now skip to after the round. Stoner guy was the big loser, getting the snake on #18 and owing everyone five bucks plus the greenies. Instead of paying out on the green or at the clubhouse he rips off in his cart to the parking lot. Apparently he doesn't have cash and will get us next round. So oh boy. This guy could be fun in small doses for sure, but playing a marathon 5+ hour round with him without our usual jovial ringleader to glue everyone together gave the round a little edge. He pissed off my other main because of certain remarks and also giving himself gimmes that weren't really gimmes. For us a gimme is inside the grip of the putter from the hole. Instead of measuring he picked up a few times in some questionable spots which was more than a little dodgy. It was poetic justice he three-putted at the end, only for him to try taking off with an IOU. I thought I was gonna have to break some kneecaps to get my money but he eventually dug around and found my $11. Eleven bucks!!! Dude, don't try finessing me out of eleven bucks and make me feel like the dick for collecting. Turns out I can put up with a lot but trying to cheat me out of money I won certainly had my blood boiling lol

Anyways, at the end of the day...

LAST ROUND: +$21
YEARLY PROFIT: +$65 minus a beer

Turns out I'm actually doing pretty well for myself this year. I'm up a round of golf anyways, pretty sweet

In other news I watched another great anime yesterday but will save the cliffnotes until I send in a review of it to The Feedback Society. This was the site I wrote my black-and-white review of Parasite for. I've been meaning to write something for months but haven't done it. The editor said that foreign films are always good to write a review of, so this is a semi-obscure movie that came out only two years ago. Fits the bill. I'm not really interested in being critical of films but I also don't want to jerk off every movie I think is amazing so I'll probs only try to chip in something every now and then. I wrote up an incoherent first draft yesterday and might spend a few more minutes on it tonight trying to create something semi-coherent and worth publishing lol

Grandparents are also coming up to Saskatoon next week. With them coming up, more hours on my work schedule, and the bachelor party next Saturday I will be hard-pressed to find time to play poker. I'm halfway towards my volume goal for the month and should have no problem hitting it but I won't be playing too too much next week. Back on the grind tomorrow though, good luck all

Today started out very promising. The booty builders on Stars were Saturday Specials ergo 75% knockout/25% regular prize pool. I was racking up knockouts like crazy early, doubling my buy-in and free rolling my first two bounty builder tourneys to go along with the good run in my 888 FT. Once I actually took note of the run good I was having I immediately went ice cold and stayed that way. At the end of the day here I even used up all twelve of the Spin and Go tickets I got from my Stars chests. I won one spin. Just that kind of day

Lost about two hundo but I tweaked my BRM the last few sessions and the damage is more than manageable. I also made Day 2 of the WPT $33 KO Championship on Monday with a slightly above average stack. I won the ticket for it on my $3.30 FT on Wednesday and looking at the schedule for WPT $33s coming up I figured this was the tourney to play. It's a three-day event so I’ll be okay to play Monday but I have an eight hour day scheduled at work on Tuesday. If things go well in the tournament I might get a bout of food poisoning or something and call in sick??? I’m really bad at lying but I don’t think my boss would be thrilled if I just said “Hey can I get off three hours early so I can play this poker tournament?” Am almost hoping to bust on Monday but hey, maybe playing Tuesday and possibly getting fired will spur me to get a better job lol. Or I could just bink the tourney for $50k+. I get that these tourneys are WPT but I wish everything wasn’t three ****ing days long. Some of us still have gigs lol.

In a surprise shift the grandparents came to Stoon today as opposed to Monday/Tuesday. I’m gonna blow off family breakfast tomorrow which I’m sure my dad will just love lol. Gotta grind! Playing Sunday and since I qualified for Day Two I'll also rip in a Monday session as well. Wednesday will be a long shot methinks. Good luck tomorrow everyone!!!

Breezy little 17 hour, 69-MTT session today. Today started out so horrible with me maybe only having about three cashes deep into the afternoon. I was a couple hundo in the hole but it was still manageable because of my new and improved BRM. I think I’ve mentioned I feel like I have pretty good tilt control while playing but I was getting pretty steamed today which is not good. I didn’t let it actually affect my strategy which I was happy about, it was just I was almost in tears of desperation lol. I know I always think I run bad and I definitely did run not too hot today but I feel like I’m still over-exaggerating my poor luck in my head. Everything balances out in the end, it’s just way easier to notice every flip you lose and not the ones you win. Anyways, I was planning for life after poker when I put together a few runs to get back in black for August, thank goodness

I was super short in my two Stars FTs and was basically at the mercy of the cards. The Magnificent 7 was a real heartbreaker of a tournament (the movie was okay, Seven Samurai was better). I was pretty shortstacked starting on F3T before catching a heater on the FT bubble and being a big stack for FT. We got to three-handed pretty fast where things were going swimmingly. I ended up getting in KT vs K3 on KJ5 for a big bounty and MASSIVE chip lead heads up. River was a 3 though Few hands later I got dealt JJ in SB with 40bb. Guy who sucked out and now barely covered me three-bet me in BB. I jammed it in and got busted by AA. It sucks when the guy in third had 20bb but I think it was just a set-up, ripping it in was profitable there so what can you do. Brutal to go from 90% chance for big chiplead HU to losing third with however many hundreds left on the table. A win there would have really helped the BR but I guess I’ll just have to keep chipping away bit by bit. Hell, getting deeper in the Mini Stack would have been nice too haha. Been getting so many nibbles and no big scores, hopefully I can rack up some genuine bankroll building results soon

Back at it tomorrow with Day 2 of the $33 WPT PKO. I am absolutely dreading Tuesday if I make a day three and how I will handle it with work. I’ve never skipped work without being legit sick before so I might have to write a script for myself, watch Youtube vids or something lol. We’ll see, maybe Tuesday will be super light and I can just come in anyways. If I’m playing Day Two I may as well make Day Three so gl me

Luck was not with me, super short 30 MTT session with only a few cashes. In the WPT I got a little unlucky and only levelled up a few times before busting. With the grandparents in town and bachelor party on Saturday I won’t be playing again until probably Sunday. It sounds like we might go pretty late so I really have no idea, I might even skip Sunday too. We’ll see. Even spending time with the fam I can still study and work on off the felt things so hopefully I can do that. Later gators

Heyo! It’s 12:50 AM and I’m working at 6 so I’m gonna be fried tomorrow. Can’t sleep because I’m loaded on pop and high on ideas. Grandparents are actually taking off tomorrow morning so I could play Thurs-Fri but might only play Friday if I get off early. Laying here in bed I got thinking about writing a book again about the whole poker journey. Just thinking about it I know exactly where I want it to start and where I want it to end, and the way I want to go about getting from Point A to Point B too. Last time I made a concerted effort to try writing the book was a few days before suicide attempt #2 which shelved the idea indefinitely lol. Rehashing stuff back then was just such a horrible idea. Probably still not a great idea now but I feel really good mentally and I feel like I could actually handle things much better. The longer I go without feeling actual for real depression the more distant everything seems. It’s crazy to think I started this thread almost three years ago now, damn time flies

Anyways, I’m not saying I will write it but I definitely feel like I have a book in me should I want to try. I wrote down some ideas for directions to go in my phone notes so we’ll see. Last year the title I thought I would go with was Sunrunning which I thought was poker related to running hot and also play with the idea of me trying to keep running to avoid all my problems which was pretty much how I operated for the past few years. With you know the added threat of tripping, falling, and immediately starting on fire which almost happened a few times The title I’m thinking about now is maybe On the Grind, even more of a poker idea while also being way easier to understand for non-poker readers and a really good representation for how the mental problems and drive to get better has all just been one long grind. Maybe it’s boring but it makes sense in my head anyways. We’ll see I guess! I was kind of bummed before because I thought ending the book by falling into a deep dark depression and retiring would not be a very good story. I think falling into a deep dark depression, retiring, taking time to actually work through my issues, and finding myself back at the tables is a much better angle. Maybe it’s not the “And I won a million dollars” finish but I don’t think too many of us in the poker world have gotten that far

Goodnight, thanks for reading everyone

*** also guys I have been bitching so much about bad beats since I’ve been back on the grind and I really just want to stop whining so I’m going to make a conscious effort to cut it out, sorry for forcing that bs on you lol

Heyoooo. Didn’t end up playing on Friday even tho I got off earlier, I just didn’t feel like it. Today is the bachelor party and I’ve decided to take Sunday Funday off tomorrow. I’ll probably be tired and a friend from Swift is coming up this weekend and asked to hang out. He had an injury at work and I guess I’d rather chill than grind on a few hours of sleep. I think next week at work I’m scheduled for mostly until 11:30 so I’ll try busting out a few afternoon sessions to compensate.

A few interesting things to note. Last night I became compelled to write an article on Studio Ghibli for the site I’ve talked about before. I wasn’t sure I wanted to do one because it sounds super ambitious to write an appreciation for Ghibli but I just kinda said f it and spent a few hours last night and this morning banging something out. I sent it off the editor and I’d imagine it’ll get accepted so I’ll post a link when it happens.

Also my boss told me and my coworker yesterday that he’ll be stepping down in October, so who knows what that means for me and the store. He said it was medical but he’s a young guy like me, I honestly think it might be stress related lol. He said that if we were interested we might be asked about filling the job in September. I literally have less than no interest but depending on the pay it might be something worth looking into. I guess I’d be as qualified as anyone and everyone at the store knows I’m a good egg. I might even want to just run the show for a few months to get it on my resume, I’m sure it would help me out in looking for other jobs. We’ll see, this sounds like the first step in accidentally spending my entire life at the grocery store lol. Gl this weekend everyone

do it for the resume (imo)
gl

I just had the stupidest nightmare of my life. For some reason I was playing a live hyper-turbo daily tourney at a casino and we were 4-handed. I was shortstack BB but we were all close together and the slight chip lead CO open jammed his stack. BU and SB snap went all-in too and it was like “holy sh**, easy ICM fold.” After going all-in SB turns over Ace-King offsuit, they didn’t realize I even had to play yet!!! So I look at my cards (I’m probs calling KK+ only, ICM would probs only say AA but I’m a fun player) and I only have AQ. “Easy fold, easy fold,” I say.

And this is where things get incredibly stupid. For some reason at this casino we are all self-dealing. So CO right beside me in the left who covers all of us gets to deal out the board (which especially makes NO SENSE since he wasn’t even button). Anyways he picks up the cards to deal out the board and in a split-second just shuffles the deck by accident and turns over like half of the cards. The floor manager (so there’s a floor manager watching but no dealer lol) is instantly like “It’s over! Mis-deal.” And the tournament is over because this guy ****ed up with the shuffle and he just auto-wins the four-way all-in as the big stack and scoops the tourney.

And me, SB, and BU are steamed. Like, WHAT are you talking about. And CO feels horrible about the whole thing, honest mistake and he seems like a decent dude. I ask if I can see a rules sheet and the floor manager runs off to get one. More than anything it looks like we lost this tournament and there’s nothing we can do about it. And then I realize wait, I FOLDED, didn’t I??? I literally saw AK exposed and I had AQ and I said easy fold and I folded but the floor manager just said I was all-in and I thought I was for some reason. Like, did I somehow have my chips over the betting line??? Like, WHAT, Like can we check the tapes because I am so sure that’s what I did, like...

And then I WOKE UP. And it was like bro... what??? I don’t even dream about poker to begin with and the first one I have is the stupidest thing you could ever imagine? There’s a pandemic rn and live poker doesn’t exist anymore (barely), chill out. Goddamn lol, I was riled up

Absolutely fried today so I was just planning to take Monday off again. We’ll see. Obviously I have not been putting in enough work to be successful poker-wise and the motivation has wavered quite a bit. My budget looks good but hanging out with my friend today I ended up blowing thirty bucks on Saskatchewan-themed cards so I could write back my friend in California who doesn’t want to visit Sask and show her the beauty of the prairies. Pretty stupid to grind all month not eating out just to blow my budget on cards hahahahha, nah I could afford it!

Bachelor party Saturday was good. It was just the groom, me and the other three groomsmen (including my bro), and then my dad and the groom’s dad. I still don’t drink alcohol so I got a little teasing from basically everyone as I drank my gingerale and diet pepsi all day lol. Ever since suicide attempt #2 which was the last time I got obliterated I haven’t even thought about how important sobriety is for me, I’ve just done it and it’s been no big deal hahaha. We had a bbq then went golfing outside of town (shot a meh 82) before coming back into town where we had a room in a sports bar rented out for the night when there was basically no sports on lol. I’ve never seen my future bro-in-law drunk before but he was kind of funny. Usually he’s quiet but he was pretty chipper, it was a good time. Towards the end of the night my dad snuck off to the VLTs for like a half hour and when he came back to the room my future bro-in-law was sternly telling him not to lose too much money, he was so riled up it was hilarious hahahahhaha. I was fully prepared to spend like a hundred bucks over the course of the day but somehow spent only $7.30 for some snacks while golfing and had everything else covered which was pretty sick. I’m well within my food budget but I’ve been freerolling so many meals on my parent’s dime. Hey, if you offer free food I’m gonna take it, sorry!

Bought a blu-ray double pack today of Face/Off and Brian De Palma’s Snake Eyes, two movies I would highly recommend. John Woo is just awesome and Snake Eyes has some of the best long takes ever (seriously amazing) with one of the worst written movie endings ever that almost completely ruins the entire thing. Still a recommended gambling movie tho I’d say. Couple days ago I saw a new movie from THIS YEAR called Never Rarely Sometimes Always which is an abortion movie I highly recommend, it was definitely pretty quality


Definitely a good call if it comes to pass haha, thx. Goodnight and I hope I have no more idiotic poker nightmare for the rest of the night

Heyo. Just to be obvious I haven't played poker at all. I just haven't wanted to. I still have the drive for poker as a side grind but I think it's pretty obvious it will never be a full-time gig. I am so so okay with that. I'm thankful I have my job right now. I'm making near minimum wage at maybe an average of 26 hours a week this month. As I approach the end of August I am surprisingly close to breakeven on income/expenses which is super reassuring. Basically if I take prolonged breaks from poker it's not the end of the world because I don't need need the money. Yes, I'll need to hop on the grind to get the extra dough to throw around but I won't have to worry about how I'll pay my rent every month (yet )

With that being said I have been spending all of my time on movies movies movies and having the best time ever As mentioned I wrote up a piece on Studio Ghibli for The Feedback Society. I'll post a link to my article here (https://www.thefeedbacksociety.com/m...ou-should-too/). I'm sure there's a more efficient way to post the link but I'm pretty stupid when it comes to basic tech stuff haha. Have a gander if you want. Calling Studio Ghibli amazing is like saying water is wet but that's why us in the biz call it amateur film criticism

To go along with my Ghibli article I have SEVERAL movies to recommend. In the last week I watched The Exorcist for the very first time. Great horror flick but not my fave. I guess I watched the director's cut which seems to be regarded as worse than the theatrical cut so I'll need to see that before a final verdict. Also rewatched a tennis movie called Borg vs McEnroe which I definitely saw for the first time when I was living in Regina November 2018. Not sure if I mentioned it then but it's a great sports movie and I love flicks where obsessed people accomplish great things. Shia LaBeouf is pretty mint in it too Lastly for my non-perfect recs is The Secret in Their Eyes. Truth be told this movie is perfect but it's just missing that extra ingredient for me to give it a 5/5. A seriously great crime/mystery/thriller. And obviously I'm talking about the 2009 Argentinian version, not the Hollywood remake

OKAY! Now perfect movies! I rewatched two flicks that I upgraded from 4.5 to 5 star movies. The first of those was Speed Racer which I might have mentioned around September-ish 2018 in the thread. I thought this movie was perfect when I saw it as a kid but had my rating talked down by people that couldn't stand it. When I rewatched it two years ago I brought it back to a 9 because it was awesome, and upon my last rewatch I clearly didn't go far enough. Just the best live action anime adaptation ever. Great comedy, characters, action, style, this movie is just so so good. A lot of people hate it but it's now a pretty popular pick as a cult classic. So just so you know when I saw this in theatres as a 12-year old I actually thought it was perfect. Just like Speed Racer, my sensibilities were clearly ahead of the curve

The second five star movie upon rewatch is a 1977 Japanese horror called House. Now I DIDN'T watch this movie in Regina but I distinctly remember seeing it on the library rack and thinking "That looks scary, no thanks." If you guys know the movie at all you'll know it's not really scary at all. It is the goofiest, weirdest, and arguably most original movie ever made. The editing is absolutely insane and Obayashi literally named all of the main characters after their personality traits (Gorgeous, Prof, Kung Fu (lol) ). Super funny and if you want to see something totally unique I highly recommend it. That being said, you could have a million different interpretations of this film and they would probably all be valid. I saw a Kogonada (great director ) video essay called Trick or Truth about this film on Vimeo before my rewatch. That essay went into the atomic bomb-theory and how House is about Hiroshima and it's devastation on Japanese generations both past and present (at the time). Seriously changed how I viewed House. It's a great flick, just watch it, seriously. It's probably more bonkers than Speed Racer and without the polarized "I hate it" faction

Also the final movie I had floating out in post office purgatory arrived today



Best movie about food I have ever seen, highly recommend for everyone. Pretty sure this was marketed as the world's first "noodle-western" lol. I'm gonna watch it again before bed tonight. Right now I have it rated at a solid 4.5/5 so we'll see if that rating has gone up lol. Honestly I don't want to play poker tomorrow. Back for sure Sunday. Weight goal is also definitely not happening. I did really great for the first couple of weeks in August but fell off the wagon again. As long as I keep getting back up, as long as I don't let things completely cave in on themselves, I will be okay. Hopefully September will be a better poker month. Honestly as long as I'm having a good time I really don't care. See ya

So I completely blew off a Sunday session again for no other reason besides I just didn't want to play. Decided to watch my two faves, Parasite and The Babadook, instead of grinding it out. I guess you can say I've been feeling pretty down for significant stretches of the last two months now. I think a good barometer for major depression is when I watch either 0-1 movies a week or if I watch 15+. Both aren't good but too many as opposed to none is the depression I'm a lot happier living with. Hit twenty in the last seven days so that'll be a big yikes for me. Whatever. How did I do this month for my August goals???

Here are my MTT stats...

MTT STATS FOR AUGUST

• MTTs Played: 409
• Hours Played: 81.25
• CAD Profit: +$504.50
• USD Profit: -$160.26

So I missed my MTT goal but not by an outrageous amount. For not playing at all in the last two weeks I was still able to get a lot of volume out of only seven sessions. That's really my only saving grace. Maybe I subconsciously wanted to book a winning month too. It's not a profit that will get me anywhere but it's nice to have a green profit line at the end.

Finished my book very early in the month and proceeded to do nothing with it. I didn't do any off felt work on mental game, actual strategies, nothing. Not good.

Unfortunately my budget goal and my weighloss goals go hand in hand. I was doing really well in both for the first half of the month before I just gave into my depression and pigged out for the last two weeks. I ended up spending a little over $330 on food, lots of it being takeout pizza and completely unnecessary, unfulfilling, and self-sabotaging junk food purchases. Because of that I ended the month at 221.4 lbs after really starting strong and looking like a lock to hit my goal. It's my fault but free food with my parents often means eating not very healthy options. Was easier to maintain a healthy diet when I couldn't freeroll them once or twice a week haha

I guess it should be said that the binge eating of food is my worst addiction. I just eat until it loses meaning and keep going. It helps me feel good, helps me feel full, takes my mind off of my troubles. It's hard not to fall into it when I feel down. Truth be told I still have a self-destructive streak in me that's alive and well. Never really gone away unfortunately. It kind of wants the world to burn, wants to pig out, wants to burn up all my money, stupid stuff like that. It's still within control. Hopefully if I stop indulging it will quiet down again but who knows

So what are September goals?

GOALS FOR SEPTEMBER

• Play 500+ MTTs
• Write two+ articles for The Feedback Society
• Finish a first draft of a short film
• Reach 215 lbs
• Spend less than $300 on food

I'm not quite giving up on poker yet. I might be somewhat busy again this month, possibly going back to Swift for one or two days and also preparing for my sister's upcoming wedding in early October. That being said 500 MTTs is like nine sessions. Very attainable. I want to get on the grind tomorrow and with labour day this upcoming Monday hopefully I will get over halfway to my volume goal in the next week. Weight and food spending goals are self-explanatory. If I spend less on food it's because I'll be eating better. Slightly reduced my weightloss expectation to a number I should be able to hit without perfection the whole month. Would be nice to be sub-200 by end of 2020...

Finally the writing goals! Even if poker did not go well I was very very happy to write my Studio Ghibli article in August. That was only the third thing I've written for public consumption since I graduated Creative Writing haha. I think if these recent poker struggles have taught me anything it's that as much as I love poker I don't think I will ever be a full-time grinder. I don't have the stamina or the drive for it and that's okay by me. That being said, movies have been ever present non-stop for ages now. If I really want to pursue something I think I could make a mark in it would be something with film. Also did not think I had 60+ hour work weeks in me but the last few months have challenged that notion. Would be great if I could channel portions of each week towards writing. Feedback Society is a low-risk, highly-satisfying outlet for me to geek out a bit on stuff. I have a few different article ideas cooking in my head and movie reviews I'd like to do for them. If I could write up a few things a month for them going forward I think that would be really awesome for me

I will not go to any kind of film school unless I've put together a significant and sustained work ethic for a number of months. If I just hop back into school and hope for everything to work out I doubt the result would be any different from UBC, which was a complete waste of time and money. Going to school just to say I'm going to school is not good at all. I don't mind if I'm 25 or 26 or 27 or whatever, just as long as I have a good outlook and I'm ready to try. If my life isn't on a traditional track five years from now I don't really care, I don't have a "Need wife, career, and kids by 30 or I'm a failure" view on life even if other people (*cough* DAD *cough*) try to make me see it that way. I just feel fortunate to be alive and I'm a big believer that this life is the only shot we have so I would much rather fail spectacularly than settle down quietly. Big talk but need to follow through. For ages I've wanted to make a poker-horror movie, or at least a short anyways. For quarantine I could even write something filmable theoretically if all it is is computer screens and bedrooms...

So that's the plan. We'll see how September goes. Just gotta string together a few good days and I'll be back and rolling. Might have to re-assess my long-term strategy depending on what happens with the possible promotion in my department in October. Alternatively I could be moved departments or get my hours cut or blah blah blah so once I know what's going on I can re-assess. Considering this is a poker thread I've tried not inundating it with non-poker posts or "I'm skipping again today!" stuff, instead opting to just say nothing. I'll probably keep with that theme if I can, although I'm still gonna drop my movie recs. Watched my two new Criterions the last few days. Tampopo was a solid 5/5, highly recommend for everyone to watch. Woman in the Dunes was still a solid 4.5/5, no increase. Objectively it's a perfect movie, just lacking that extra little punch for me. Still a big recommendation for everyone. Goodnight

fwiw, the 'food thing' negatively impacts my poker game to the point where I will take the following day off from the tables. It is brutal.

Heyo. So I didn’t play any poker, my motivation in that regard is at zero. I feel much more interested in trying to write at the moment although I haven’t done anything in that regard either. I’ve only watched movies and ate junk food, still in a foul mood but I’ll spare the details

Reflecting on wanting to make writing a habit, I think that writing while playing poker to such a hardcore extent would be pretty incompatible. When I do play poker it eats up all of the hours I have in the day and I have no energy for anything else after which is self-explanatory. Currently reading Daily Rituals, a book on the habits of famous artists, and a) they seem pretty miserable and b) they also seem to have routines reflecting most 9-5 jobs (morning work - lunch break - afternoon work - free time). Of course there are variations to the formula but all of this makes a lot of sense to me. However, if I decided that I want to play poker on all my days off I will rob myself of the opportunity to have full-fledged writing days. I can still write on days where I get off at 1 or 2 but I want to create good routines moving forward. I feel I have more of a future artistically than I do poker-wise. Obviously I have no future in either department if I don’t make myself sit at the computer to begin with

So yeah. I am working full time at work this week (boss on vacay) so earliest poker session back would be Saturday if I decide to play. Had an insane movie grind this week and I can feel myself growing bored of it already, much the same as I was in April before I picked up poker as my side grind. So I am feeling the itch to do stuff other than movies. Poker or writing, we’ll see which I channel my boredom into

Great movies of the last week: Roar (wild cats do wild things ), Bill & Ted Face the Music (my least favourite of the trilogy but still a good time and I love Alex Winter), Maborosi (the first Kore-eda I was super into, absolutely unreal cinematography), Bad Education (rewatch for me, fave of 2020 11 movies in lol), Portrait of a Lady on Fire (colours straight out of Witcher 3: Blood and Wine), Mishima: A Life in Four Chapters (unconventional and v interesting biopic), and Mind Game (whack anime lol).

I also saw two new movies I was not super into. I did not understand anything that happened in Tenet. While I appreciate Nolan and I like his movies I find that I don’t really love any of them, particularly this one. Also saw Charlie Kaufman’s I’m Thinking of Ending Things. I read the book thinking I would write a review of it for the movie website but then I just did not understand the movie at all. Of course I could write a review saying that but I would sure look like an idiot. Pretty similar experience to Tenet tbh, all though the latter had a lot less raw entertainment value and way more artistic pretentiousness. And I started watching Twin Peaks tonight. I am very into it, I feel like I’m laughing way more than I should be. Will be grinding that for the foreseeable future...


I feel ya, not fun at all. I don’t know if I’ve used it to skip poker but I’ve used eating bad the day before to avoid working out the next day which is an easy way to not get very far. I did get in my first workout in a long time last week but it was not a sustained effort, will need to try again this week. Weight goal is already in serious doubt (goddammit ). Would love to not have these backslides. My bro moved back to stoon this week, he was telling me that it shouldn’t be hard to lose weight if I just had a healthy diet. Yeah, no ****, thanks sherlock lol.

Goodnight, good luck everyone. Probs write again next weekend, we’ll see if I get anything accomplished in the next seven days

Heyo, just an update. Was wanting to play this weekend but I’m being enlisted to move furniture/workout equipment from Swift. So I’ll probably be tied up all weekend, will try to play Sunday if I can get it free. Other than that I’m back to 20 hours next week at work so can hopefully play a few sessions. This week has been an absolute gongshow, just a complete nightmare at work (I’m not getting paid nearly enough) and my sister decided she wanted us all dressed in custom suits for her wedding in three weeks after telling everyone for months just to wear something nice. At least I’m not paying for anything but I’ve been stuck in a men’s clothing store for two nights this week. Big yikes, not my vibe at all. Good luck out there everyone

I hope you don't mind me adding in my own experiences here in your thread.... ie. 'the food thing'... but I do have A LOT of experience with it, lol... sigh

Years ago I was a competitive bodybuilder, a powerlifter & also operated a personal training business where I trained people in movie business and also trained some other trainers. (and had a gym I used for some of this in my livingroom). I researched the nutrition part extensively.
What your brother has to say is solid advice

I typically eat pretty clean these days but I've been fighting 'the food thing' for quite awhile now. Had Day3 w/o fk'n up ... until I fk'd up last night... & had 5days last week. It seems to be getting better as I have not given up the fight. For me part of 'the fight' is to actually surrender. Personally I need to look at it similarly to how an alcoholic views alcohol (to drink is to die!). When I 'fk up' I can't play the following day because I can feel a big impact on my thinking process. I KNOW I will not be playing optimally (well... I don't really need to play A-game for micro/low stakes... but why wouldn't I want to be?). So I choose to not play. Over time I've felt the impact of 'food' becoming greater & greater. Today I'm back to Day1 Getting ready to play this weekend as I won't have much time to play over the next couple weeks and have been thinking "I wouldn't mind banking a few bucks off of this 'hobby'... and come to think of it... If I don't I might have to quit retirement and go and get a part-time job (no thanks).

One thing I do to stay on track (although honestly my advice at 'how to fk up' might be best) is > If I begin to have a craving coming on, I prepare a healthy meal/snack a.s.a.p. Once I've eaten something healthy, the craving is gone. When I'm planning to play MTT's for the day, I like to prepare my meals in advance & have at least one meal set aside & a protein shake.

Heyoooo. Once again, I haven't played any poker. I think this will be more common as I finally started the work on my poker movie script

I decided to skip over the idea of a poker horror short for now. I think to do a poker horror movie would be inviting it to have the monster be gambling addiction (or the fear of it) which isn't something I'm fully on board with. My dream poker movie would be poker how I've experienced it. Just fun as ****, the best time ever, with all of this freedom and interesting people and experiences I've had along the way. More or less I'm just doing a semi-autobiographical drama. I want the depression, and the irate parents, with the personal failings and personal growth and random German poker coaches. More or less a coming of age I guess.

I definitely have enough material for a movie. Hard part is picking out what's important, getting my characters and backstories right, thinking about the themes I want to tackle and how I'll do it. The real logistical nightmare is how to make the poker journey seem somewhat justified/rational and have the protagonist not come off as some spoiled brat (which might be impossible ). I've only written scripts for short films and TV (longest being about 30 pages, page a minute means I might want in the neighbourhood of 120 for this). Have been messaging my screenwriting friend from UBC days who I guess is trying to write a movie script himself atm. Not much else to do right now lol. It'll be a bumpy go but I gotta start somewhere if I'd like to get anywhere in the film industry. This is the movie that's been burning inside me for years now so I better try getting it on paper

Of course I would love to get this made and I would love to be the one to direct it but that's complete fancyland at this point, so for now I don't want to think about budget, how it'll be shot, etc., I just want to get a script done. I barely understand directing to begin with and I thought my first short film, although it had a decent grasp on story, was not very funny which is terrible for a comedy. They say comedy is the hardest to direct and I can tell you that's true. If I ever have the opportunity to direct again it would definitely be dramatic, with flairs of humour at most, where a joke not landing doesn't result in unbearable cringe

SO! I think it would be pretty awesome to have a NEW GOAL: finish the first draft of my poker movie by the end of 2020. Maybe that sounds daunting but I don't think it's crazy. I'm just churning up ideas, I've started taking notes for a few scenes and things are coalescing in my brain. They say you should outline first so I'm just outlining scene ideas on flash cards. I know the gist of where I want to start, where I want to finish, and how I want it all to unravel inbetween. I just need the specifics ironed out. If I work a little bit more or less every day I would be well on my way to making a dent. To have spent a couple hours the last two days on this is a big accomplishment after doing nothing screenwriting related since I graduated in 2017. So I guess I'm hopeful, but I'm keeping expectations low so as not to implode if I happen not to meet them. Make sense?

I know I've lamented the idea in the past of writing from personal experiences but I think anything I've done with any kind of quality was rooted somewhere in that. Before it carried serious concerns about my mental stability if I tried and I definitely feel capable of that load now. The more distance I get from it all, the better. Not to say I haven't been depressed the past few months. It's just not as life-or-death as it has been in the past

I was super busy the last week so I didn't get the chance to watch too many movies. Twin Peaks is still great but I'm over halfway through season two and I'm already dragging myself to try and finish it. TV shows just really aren't my bag. On the movie front, I'd recommend Akira Kurosawa's Scandal which is my ninth Kurosawa this year and an intersting 1950 paparazzi/freedom of speech drama that is still relevant today. I even found the personal redemption arc of the crappy lawyer to be more enjoyable than the much more acclaimed Ikiru which you may as well watch (two and a half hours can be tough tho). Also big recommend for Stanley Kubrick's Barry Lyndon which was absolutely gorgi and would honestly be my dream life if I lived in 18th century England. Three hours long but a quick three hours, the dude is a womanizer and a duellist and a cardsharp, sign me up. Last recommend is Lee Chang-Dong's Secret Sunshine which I watched at the start of quarantine too. Honestly wouldn't mind modeling my movie after this one. It has big ideas but it's really stripped down and is about these small town people and just how they live their life, how this woman tries overcoming these never-ending tragedies. Love the Christianity aspect in it too although I'm not touching religion with a ten-foot pole in mine haha


Solid wisdom/insight dude. It's definitely easier to eat healthy when I'm cooking all of my own food. I think that has been complicated in the last few months through spending extended time with my parents who just moved to town. Their idea of life is very much "let's enjoy it!" and, if they try to diet, cave almost just as fast and start eating unhealthy foods. If I get invited to a restaurant with them I still have the option to choose something healthy off the menu. The past few months I just haven't tried doing that and as a result have suffered on the scale. Saying no to free food absolutely sucks when I'm trying to save money but it's a habit I might have to try out. That or just get my willpower back in line. When I do cook I usually make four portions which covers me for a significant stretch of days. Been eating homemade chicken the last few days, just need to keep it up.

We now have a treadmill at my parent's house in Stoon. My brother sent his class schedule and I'm basically allowed to come over and use it whenever he isn't in class. I think I need to try making this a regular thing, just view it as going to the gym. I think if I put on gym clothes and drive over it's a routine I can stick to. Thinking of the habit book I just read, things like putting on runners at the start of a day was enough to make people go for a run. In the past, sustained efforts by me to work out usually revolved around going to the gym (routine) and also working out while watching Oiler games in high school (routine). If I can make driving to my parents in workout gear a routine I can hopefully make some progress. It's harder to do with no treadmill at the house I live at and no Oilers hockey to distract me (although the Islanders, my 1B team, aren't dead yet in the playoffs).


A lot of talk today! Talk is cheap though, actions are what count. I will defs update the thread whenever I play a session or if I feel like an update is in order. That being said I'll probably be playing significantly less. It's been a month since my last session but that was an unplanned month off. Hopefully I can still play a couple hundred MTTs a month, some sporadic efforts, but with the wedding coming up I know I'll be swamped for the next few weeks. Will keep ya posted

Heyo. No poker but I thought I should put in some golf gambling results from the last week. After my last round in August I didn't play with the crew again until last Monday. Played today and last Monday at Dakota and played last Friday for my first round at Holiday Park this year (the local muni course). Usually I burn out on golf mid-August but I am loving every second I can get out there. Fall golf is pretty awesome, not gonna lie

Anyways, we played with greenies, snakes, and lefty/righty vegas scoring (I think). The lefty/righty is the two players on left teaming up, two on right doing the same. Scoring worked that you put your individual scores together for a two-digit number (low then high), and whichever team had a better score got the difference in ticks for their card. If you got a birdie then your opponents score would be flipped so high number is first. So on a par-three, if one team had two pars (33) and the other team had a par and a bogey (34) the first team's players would get one tick each. If first team had a birdie and a par (23), the opponent's score would be flipped (43) and they would get 20 ticks instead. That was our side game with top two winning $5 on the Mondays and a drink on Friday.

So, last Monday I lost the game but won the snake and two greenies for a total of +$6. On Friday I won the game in comeback fashion #17 and lucked out to win snake too. Chip in two greenies (while paying out two) and I finished +$13 plus a drink. Today I shot an 81 with seven 3-putts () including on the last hole to finish with the snake. However I won the game and also a greenie so only finished the round -$12. Where was I last time?

After those last few rounds...

LAST THREE ROUNDS: +$7 plus a drink
YEARLY PROFIT: +$72

The drink I collected on was only a Diet Pepsi so didn't quite come out even there but I'll say I did. The guys I play with have memberships that start for after two but basically if you aren't playing by three you're gonna get caught in the dark now. Might get out for one or two more rounds with them but it's hard to say, hopefully we can squeeze out a few more by year's end

With me not playing poker atm I'm going to try avoiding updates with irrelevant stuff all of the time although I still consider this somewhat relevant since it is a bit of a life goal thread too. Not sure if I'll get back on the felt this week since I am going to Swift this weekend to hang with friends/golf at a course in town. I haven't been writing a lot but I've done little things. Hopefully I can finish my library article tomorrow or Wednesday and I just pitched an Asian Horror idea to the guy that runs Feedback Society. Basically I'd write a piece on an Asian horror movie every week for the month of October leading up to Halloween. Pretty sure the order I'm gonna go in is Train to Busan - Kuroneko - The Wailing - Hausu. Two Japanese, two South Korean, all big recommends, a solid mix of horrors (although no Godzilla!!!)

Quick recommends: Akira Kurosawa's The Bad Sleep Well and Sanjuro (which I liked a lot more than Yojimbo) along with Brian De Palma's Body Double and also 2001: A Space Odyssey. I hated 2001 when I saw it as an 18 year old but it was so much better this time around, glad I gave it another shot. See ya

I’ve been having some absolutely tilting life run bad. My sister’s wedding is this weekend and I’ve been running around now for weeks trying to get my suit for it. Yesterday it finally came in. I ran inside for ten minutes to get alterations and when I came back out I had a parking ticket flapping on my windshield. Holy ****, it didn’t even cross my mind that it was pay parking. Couple that with losing my golf rangefinder today, spending hours writing meaningless film articles, and being completely passed over for the job promotion I was talking about and things have just not been going well. At least I haven’t been too depressed, I’ve just been so f’ing annoyed. I can’t wait for this week to be over...

Anyways, it is the last day in September. A quick reflection...

So I played literally zero poker. Big fat F for that.

The Feedback Society went much better. I finally finished the library article I wanted to do and I’m pretty happy with how it turned out. - https://www.thefeedbacksociety.com/m...ublic-library/ - I also finished my first article for my Asian horror October this afternoon, I’ll make sure to post it once it’s up. The thing with this stuff is it’s insanely time consuming. I put way too much thought into all of these and it’s for no money and probably no exposure. The cost/benefit isn’t great but I’m pot committed for four more reviews. We’ll see what happens after that.

The first draft was abandoned for the feature film idea. Sadly I made no progress on my script but I spent a lot of time on my articles and consistently chipped away. The habit is what matters and I’m proud to have been putting work in.

Today I weighed in at 226 lbs. Trending in the wrong direction but I’ve been behaving myself much better in the last ten days, even mixing in a few workouts. That number could easily be north of 230, so whatever. Needless to say I airmailed my food budget. Money has been slipping through my fingers like crazy lol

Alright, here are my goals for October...

GOALS FOR OCTOBER

• Play 300+ MTTs
• Write all of my Asian Horror reviews
• Reach 218lbs

A more than attainable list. I fully plan on grinding poker again but I’ll be tied up until at least a week from now. I saw that Party is running the Monster Series again which got me so pumped up lol, it was a little embarrassing. For my movie reviews I have rough drafts of the last four and I would love to just grind them out ASAP. I think my writing is okay but the prose can be super wordy and clunky and I love my ****ing commas lol. Last one would just be a good number to hit. I’ve just been stagnant lately but I need to commit to eating good and working out again. I can still hit 200 by end of the year but things would have to go pretty good.

As mentioned earlier, I did go golfing today. The wind was crazy and my game has absolutely abandoned me. It was a total gongshow out there. For an update on where I was...

So today I was breakeven. Won the snake for $5 while losing the lefty/righty game. The single greenie I won cancelled out the three that I lost. So the number above remains the same. Sadly, I lost my rangefinder out on the course. I ripped around on a cart for a half hour but was unable to find it. I think the odds are pretty good someone decided to play finders keepers, so I might just be going off of fairway stakes for now as God intended

I’m booked in for a round of golf next week as the weather looks like it’ll hold. Grandma and grandpa are in town and the wedding will completely eat up the next few days. I’ll be so glad when it’s over. I cannot wait to get back on the grind. Maybe I won’t play as much volume as I have been but I really do need more income coming in. The promotion is not coming and I am running at a monthly deficit. I have enough saved up it isn’t urgent but I desperately need some poker winnings to get back in black

I didn’t get to watch too many movies since my last post but I did watch a couple of bangers. Columbus is one of my fave period and I made sure to revisit that while I was feeling down. A similarly indie piece was Buffalo ‘66. I hated the lead guy but Christina Ricci was lowkey the hottest chick I’ve ever seen in a film . The Thing is a classic horror film and Night is Short, Walk on Girl is an insanely funny and original anime. It was the one I wanted to write a review about a few weeks back but with this Asian horror month stuff that idea is on the shelf indefinitely. Go check it out

Heyo! Got in another round of golf today. Shot a weird 82, horrible front nine but two-over on the back. There were only three of us. We played $2 Greenies and Nines. Basically best player on a hole gets 5 ticks, second 3, and last 1. Each tick is worth 25 cents and you pay out the difference at the end. I was second place in the game but ended up losing all five greenies. Last round was breakeven so to repeat my last update...

After today...

LAST ROUND: -$12
YEARLY PROFIT: +$60

Saved my worst golf for the end of the year. Yikes. Apparently next week will be the last week of golf in town. I might get out again but I also might not, hard to say. Either way I’m glad coronavirus didn’t lock me completely inside this summer

Was thinking I might get to play poker this week but grandparents decided to stay longer than planned which is all good by me. My sister’s wedding was on Saturday and it was honestly pretty fun. Super sketched out having so many people together in times of COVID but we haven’t been tagged with an outbreak yet! That was two weekends in a row I was in drinking situations and kind of wished I could partake, but I passed both times. The weekend before was a friend’s birthday and I actually ended up being super bummed out at the end of the night so I was glad I wasn’t drunk haha. Just not worth it for me

On top of that I’ve been putting in work for my movie reviews. With grandparents its been hard to find time to do anything but I finished my piece for this week and I was actually pretty happy with it. Last week was Train to Busan and I don’t think it turned out as well but I tried haha. Here’s the link hopefully (https://www.thefeedbacksociety.com/m...rain-to-busan/)

Saw two movies to recommend. The first is The Quiet Family which was a Korean horror that had me laughing non-stop. Also saw the OG Godzilla. It’s not a monster movie, it’s an anti-war film!!!

The last month has been crazy in that I’ve actually been super busy. It’s frustrating for me when I’m used to having no responsibilities. I love my free time too much. I’m really glad that it will cool down next week so I can get back on a likely reduced grind. If my next post isn’t about a poker session then I am a total ass. See ya

Heyo everyone! I am an ass because I'm not here to post about poker. It has been a very productive stretch for me though and I have some big news! I've been offered a job delivering mail for the Christmas season again! It's an on-call arrangement but with winter and COVID going around it is very very likely that I'll be able to get in a lot of hours, possibly even five full-time shifts a week all the way through the holiday season. This could even carry into January/February because of postal delays right now.

A couple key things. The pay is REALLY GOOD! Basically even if I only work two shifts a week I will make more than a typical week at my current job. Plan is to get as many hours as possible and save up some dough while keeping an eye to getting full-time employment going forward. This is also really good because it will be GREAT EXERCISE!!! I absolutely melted the pounds off early in my previous mail gig. This will apparently be a mix between driving and walking shifts, whatever I'm needed for. Apparently the longest walking route they have in Saskatoon is 27KM A DAY!!! I don't know if every route would be that intense but if I just semi-behave myself I will lose a lot of weight. With the wedding and grandparents sticking around after I just ate absolutely horrible for two weeks solid and I've kept it up the last week. I won't hit my weight goal this month but who knows, maybe 200lbs by 2021 is still in play haha

Tomorrow I'll be letting my current job know that I got a new gig for the holidays. I'll either have to quit so I can have full availability or work out an arrangement where I can come back and work once the holiday season is over. Apparently after the holidays I can expect to not get mail shifts for weeks on end (assuming I don't get canned) so it would really suck to not have a job to come back to once it's over, even if I do make insane bank. I was planning to play poker yesterday (Saturday) but I was running around trying to fill out all the necessary forms to start working as soon as possible. Not sure when I'll get started, earliest might be next Monday? We'll see

Since this will be a thing where I'll give myself full availability for the mail gig I am planning to hopefully play poker on days that I'm not doing mail. I still might have weekends free and I'll know early in the morning whether or not I'm delivering mail a certain day. If I make up for lost days by playing poker hopefully I will be maximizing my earning potential

Of course I was also planning to play today but then I stayed up into the early morning hours playing Persona 5. Oh my god what a long game. I've been playing for about a week, just crossed over the 20 hour mark, and literally just beat the first dungeon. Apparently this game easily clears 100+ hours so I'll probably be playing this for the next couple weeks/months lol. First ten hours were heavy exposition but now that I'm into gameplay I'm having way too much fun. I was honestly dreaming last night about running around Tokyo doing activities to level up my skills. Way too much fun

I think the thing with poker and why I've neglected it is because it is ultimately my side gig. I put in so many hours because there was nothing else I wanted to do with my free time for a few months. Now I'm in a serious gaming/movie/golf kick (golf season OFFICIALLY OVER now, last round on Friday with my bro in near-freezing weather lol) and I want to spend my free time doing that stuff. It would be awesome if I cared more about making as much money as possible but I really don't. Without that, poker motivation isn't always there. I'm still desperately hoping to play Wednesday, AT LEAST next weekend but no promises. I guess that the really nice thing is that I don't have to play to make a living and I really appreciate that now. My full intention is to keep playing, trust me, but I just haven't been in that mode lately. At least I stopped inundating my thread with pointless updates every day, now it's just every week or so haha

Here is my piece on Kuroneko (https://www.thefeedbacksociety.com/m...-tfs-kuroneka/) I wrote last week which I am really proud of. There's a guy I follow on Letterboxd who's writing style I've tried to emulate a bit, at least in the opening paragraph. FAIR WARNING: these pieces are mildly suggestive at minimum as to plot development, even containing mild spoilers. Some guy commented on my Train to Busan piece about how spoilery it was and I was honestly devastated. I understand where he was coming from but I've been trying really hard to not be spoilery so just fair warning. Truth be told I wouldn't read any of these if you've never seen the movies. Even getting a barebones setup of the plot is too much for me, I just go in cold turkey. So I just want to say **** that guy, getting criticism on something I'm using my free time on is too much for me to bear haha. Crazy how easy it is for people to be negative of others just trying to do their best, but I guess everyone is entitled to their opinion. I can't even imagine what it would be like for the Rian Johnson's/John Boyega's of the world who piss off a bunch of fanboys just for trying to do their own thing in art, mad respect to those people, seriously. The guy running the website hasn't posted my Audition piece yet even tho I emailed it to him on Wednesday. I really really really tried to go spoiler-lite on that one but hey, just go in cold fellas, you won't regret it (or maybe you will (in a good way))

Great movies I've seen recently! Re-watched Battle Royale and was honestly shocked how much better it was than I remembered. I definitely liked it last time, I thought it was okay but I was shocked how much more I loved it this time. Seriously great high school movie, super stylish/violent and way better than The Hunger Games. Another movie that surprised me with how much I liked it the second time was Searching. John Cho is just a megastar in my eyes Rewatched a couple of five star movies I saw for the first time within the last ten months, Bong Joon-ho's Mother and Joachim Trier's Oslo, August 31st. Mother is just a seriously interesting, entertaining, and funny murder mystery movie that packs a pretty strong emotional punch. I wasn't too sure if Oslo, August 31st was deserving of five stars when I last saw it on New Year's day (my first movie of 2020 lol) but this watch just confirmed it. It's about a drug addict out and about in Oslo and is probably one of the most depressing movies I've ever seen. Seriously a great reminder of why I don't drink anymore hahahaha, I cannot recommend it enough. The last movie I saw I only rated 4.5/5 but I think there's a pretty good chance it'll get bumped up next time I see it. Kiyoshi Kurosawa's Pulse scared the absolute **** out of me for its entire runtime. Very similar to slow-paced early J-horror like Ringu which are to me maybe the most purely terrifying movies ever. Pulse has a lot to say about technology and loneliness in our modern age too and I honestly had no idea what to do with myself after I finished watching it haha. Big fan

GOOD LUCK EVERYONE!!! I know that I'm missing out on Pokerstars' KO series right now but hopefully I'll catch the tail end of it. I though PartyPoker's Monster Series was happening October 25th but now it looks like it'll maybe be October 31st. I'm seriously hoping to grind a decent volume and with the mail gig I might even be able to deposit money so I can tackle $22s+ right out of the gate. I guess we'll see how my availability will work with my new job! I've been running a deficit of a couple hundred dollars the last few months so I'm beyond excited to make enough to afford my rent like a normal person haha. IF MY NEXT POST ISN'T ABOUT POKER THAN I AM A MEGA ASS!!! See ya!

Busted out 29 tourneys, a decent F2T, and one micro FT (both on 888) in my first session in about two and a half months. Holy, it's great to be back, even if I lost like $90

Was definitely flustered the first half hour or so getting into the swing of things. StarsHelper, which I use for placing tables and toggling between BB and numerical chips on Stars, wasn't working because of a new Stars overhaul. And oh my god, does it look like ****. I mean wtf I thought my computer was gonna explode running Stars haha. Would love to go back to the old way of things but might not be able to. I miss the old 888 too. Do I really need avatars?

I definitely missed spots but that's understandable for the first session after a LONG layoff. Ranges were okay but not perfect, definite room for improvement. The one thing I did very well was following my BRM. I didn't play anything more than $11, mostly sticking in the $5.50-$7.50 range. I think I will keep that strategy for the next few weeks but I will leave myself open to playing $16.50s in the Monster Series and maybe a $22 or $33 Championship event if I don't profit my way to that buy-in level. I start training for my new job Monday November 2 so I'll only be able to play Saturday-Sunday anyways. Hopefully I can make a little extra pocket money

So I got detoured the last couple of attempted re-entries to the poker scene. I fully meant to play last Wednesday but had to go perform a physical fitness assessment for the mail job. Was hoping to play last weekend but didn’t. Friday I went to a movie I’d been dying to see with my brother, Sunday my auntie came into town so I bailed so we could have supper together. Saturday I was just too lazy haha. Was also wanting to play yesterday on my last free Wednesday from the grocery store but my aunt needed a ride to the airport. I’m trying to be a good person! Never know how many times you’ll get to see everyone and I can’t let her walk there lol. I was desperately hoping to get in one session before Monster Series started so I’m glad I played today. The two and a half months off were not even remotely planned. I hope I can get some solid consistency during the winter months. I should have weekends free but I won’t be busting out any afternoon sessions after work unless I start grinding cash lol. Leaves me free to watch movies during the week or maybe study haha


Finished up my Spooky TFS Asian Horror series, my last piece coming out yesterday. Here are the last few articles I wrote up for The Feedback Society:

Audition: https://www.thefeedbacksociety.com/m...-tfs-audition/

The Wailing: https://www.thefeedbacksociety.com/m...s-the-wailing/

Hausu: https://www.thefeedbacksociety.com/m...s-hausu-house/


I think my Audition and Hausu pieces were pretty okay, especially the latter. The Wailing was tough because I had no idea how to describe ritualistic practices without repeating myself ten times. Overall the experience of writing these five articles in a row (six if you count my piece on the library) was pretty rewarding even if I hope I never do it again. The amount of time I put into everything, which hinged on me rewatching the movies while taking notes (which takes a lot of the fun out of it haha) combined with writing everything under the stress of a loose weekly deadline occupied a lot of space in my brain. Too much space for something that was volunteer work haha. I’ll probably write a piece every now and again still. It’d be nice to write about something current that isn’t Japanese or South Korean…

Movie recs! Our Little Sister by Hirokazu Kore-eda, the same director as Maborosi, was just awesome. I’m a complete sucker for those quiet, character driven pieces that are bound up in tragedy. Also really loved Mike Leigh’s Happy-Go-Lucky which gave me a view into the mind of a Kindergarten teacher and had the most ballistic conspiracy theorist driving instructor ever. Everything involving those two in the car was electric. Lastly, last Friday as mentioned I saw a movie with my brother at our local independent theatre. That movie was Bong Joon-Ho’s Memories of Murder. I’ve been dying to rewatch this since I first saw Parasite last November. I figured I’d like it way more than 2017 Blake and I was right. Just amazing stuff, perfect first shot and a perfect last shot. The fact that it was based on a real-life serial killer took me out of the comedic moments, but everything else was spot on.

It’s my last day at work tomorrow! My last two weeks are up and I'm freeing myself up full-time for the new mail gig. The grocery store has been really good to me in that it gave me room to piece myself back together and recover from the pit of despair I was in when I was hired 17 months ago. Honestly the exact same premise as me and Safeway to kick off the thread, although I hope I did things right this time The grocery store was not so good in that there was no room for professional growth and I can’t adequately pay my own bills haha. I’m looking forward to the new gig. Being an on-call mail guy, I’ll only get shifts when someone calls in sick. I should be getting lots of hours but it’s hard to say. All I know is that I’m getting ten days of training over the next two and a half weeks where I’ll make the equivalent of roughly a month and a half at my current job. So I’m pretty pumped haha.

Now that I’m playing poker again the movie talk will hopefully take a backseat to final tables and massive scores. I won’t be playing tomorrow as I’m leaving myself open for a farewell to the store and my boss I’ve worked under the last year+. Will be back 100% on Saturday to get back in black. MONSTER SERIES BABY LET’S GO!!!

Hey im the same age as you been following ur thread for a while when you were broke glad to see ur doing good now.

PS: I went broke too, went from 50k-$0 (over the course of like 2 years of tilting, playing meh, and spending recklessly) and then 1k-45k (this year mainly from some mtt scores) would be awesome if u wanted to review and go over some hands sometime LMK!

Man didn’t u love the wailing? I rewatched it a few times to get a better understanding of it. I plan to read your article on it; no idea if you liked it. Any other asian horror movies or just horror in general u recommend?


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Serious question: why do I STOP playing poker??? I'm an absolute GOD

Had my first real real Stars FT today where I actually had a stack and a shot at the Big $7.50. Got to be chip lead with about 100 left and just kept that edge to F2T. At that point I went a little card dead. Came into FT about middle of the pack but still had like 50bbs. Not sure I'm happy with how I played on the FT. I think I missed spots to reraise for value in situations where I had 2 pairs+ but I was just content to call down. If I had been a little more aggro I could have been in a better situation and not left to the fate of the chips. It is what it is

Had a nice run in The Ocean's $11 on Party as well. Just kept on plugging away and actually slugged it out a bit with Matt Staples F3T and F2T. I was trying to clip the spot I sucked out on him A3>A9 for my tourney life but couldn't get Twitch to work haha. Had a good time watching the stream, if you don't have a sense of schadenfreude should you really be playing poker? Personal highlight was seeing that he'd highlighted me as a reg lol. I think I did the best I could for F2T so no regrets with fifth place.

Throw in a F3T in the $22 Predator and I had a great winning day. I played The Predator because I had a ticket for it so I freerolled my way to like $150+ which was sweeeeet. Wish I could've nailed a big score but just a terrific day overall

And that's the end of the month. Happy Halloween! Here were my goals for this month...

So I did my Spooky TFS, good job me! I did not reach my weight goal and moved substantially in the wrong direction, so bad job me! And I barely played any poker haha. Here's what I managed in my two sessions...

OCTOBER MTT STATS

• MTTs Played: 79
• Hours Played: 19.5
• Monthly Profit (CAD): +$551.92
• Monthly Profit (USD): +$430.13

So a sick day made these two days profitable at least. Maybe I'll take a crack at some $16.50s tomorrow. Was discouraged to see that a lot of the Monster Series tourneys are multi-day events including lots of Monday action which just robs me of the ability to play the events I thought I'd be able to. OH WELL, I made like 4x my buy-in in the Monster Series #2 which I was happy about

Here are my goals for the upcoming month...

GOALS FOR NOVEMBER

• Play 200+ MTTs
• Get sub-230lbs
• MAKE BANK

I think I didn't manage as many tourneys as I usually do today because my Big $7.50 run had me take a chill pill on registering maybe an hour or so earlier. I won't even bother weighing myself. Pretty sure I'm between 235-240 lbs. I have no one to blame but myself, I just have to behave myself and start working out again. Will be easier to lose weight when I start my new mail gig but I need to eat good to shed the pounds. Finally, I want to see a nice fat increase to my bank account this month. Honestly, the poker results don't hurt either. Let's make $5k+ how bout


$45k in poker winnings is the absolute dream! That's awesome man! Being broke is no fun, I hope I never have that problem again haha


LOVE The Wailing. Saw it a little over two years ago and was just blown away. Don't usually rewatch movies that are 2.5 hours+ but I've watched it like five times since haha. I use Letterboxd to keep track of everything I watch and how I feel about it. Five star movies are the holy grail, but 4.5 are pretty sick too. 4.5/5 not pictured are Pulse and The Quiet Family. I used to not like horrors at all so I only have 123 horrors logged, most of them in a post-Babadook world for me (like the last 3-ish years ). Definitely check out The Feedback Society linked in my last post, those five movies are my five fave Asian horrors

Congrats on the 2 scores friend and GL in the weight loss

yo congrats on the binx bra, i forget if you've seen it but you should check out ALIVE, I think it's Korean zombie horror, it really struck a chord with me being couped up in my room