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Poker Goals & Challenges Post your threads logging your travels up the poker ladder as you achieve your poker goals and dreams. "Challenges" does NOT mean prop bets, wagers, etc.

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Old 02-18-2017, 07:27 AM   #26
flawz01
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Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

Quote:
Originally Posted by flawz01 View Post
Cheers bud!



Thanks mate. I think K9s from the SB is fairly standard tbh. Of course the J6s is nowhere near standard after the initial 3b pre but I had some notes on the guy and was planning to take the hand down on good runouts. I 3b from the BB v SB, not from the SB. I think that's pretty standard too, depending on how you construct your ranges of course. We can't all be nits meale

You're right about me bluffing too much though and what's needed to beat 10nlz. I've got a note stuck to my screen saying "Don't bluff rivers, don't ch/c 3 streets" Don't forget that the hands I post are some of the weirder ones. It's strange that you pulled me up on the 3bets pre though cos again, I think they're both pretty standard.
Just wanted to add to this to clarify why I think they're standard and that I'm not just being arrogant . I 3b a wide linear range from the SB v LP which has KTs as the lowest Kx that I 3b by default v CO open. If CO is a fish or folding fairly regularly to 3b's then I'll extend this to include K9-K8s. From the BB v SB I'm 3betting a wide polar range. The lowest Jxs I defend by calling is J7s, so J6s makes it nicely into my 3b bluffing range. Postflop was just a super high variance exploitative play that paid off this time. It's only spew if it doesn't get through
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Old 02-18-2017, 11:10 AM   #27
Clanty
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Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

My only issue with K9 is that he opens 3x, so your SPR is going to be a lot smaller which'll make it pretty hard to create enough EV to do so. It'll still fine and not a problem, but I'd make it a frequency 3b.

J6 is a std 3b but not if you're peeling 4b's

Quote:
Originally Posted by meale View Post
To win at 10NLz on Stars, you need to play tight and more or less ABC. It's about value extraction, exploiting fish, and making folds.

GL man, I'll be railing.
Also this is not true. Playing a very aggressive style (in the right way, of course) will have a much higher EV. But the J6s doens't fall into the "right way" side of things IMO.
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Old 02-18-2017, 04:25 PM   #28
flawz01
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Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

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Originally Posted by Clanty View Post
My only issue with K9 is that he opens 3x, so your SPR is going to be a lot smaller which'll make it pretty hard to create enough EV to do so. It'll still fine and not a problem, but I'd make it a frequency 3b.

J6 is a std 3b but not if you're peeling 4b's



Also this is not true. Playing a very aggressive style (in the right way, of course) will have a much higher EV. But the J6s doens't fall into the "right way" side of things IMO.
Ye pretty much my thoughts exactly. I'm not trying to justify the J6s hand just thought it was a funny one to include. My ranges from the BU and blinds are very dynamic depending on who's opened/is left to act.

Played the full 8 hours today and I'm slowly losing my mind. Yet again my winrate's been washed away by a torrent of bad beats and ridiculous runouts. I actually feel a little bit sorry for myself. Like I watch streams a fair bit and they might take one or 2 sick beats over the course of 5 or 6 hours. I literally lose a crazy pot like 2 or 3 times an hour, EVERY day. Check out some of these (cos I know you all love hearing about other people's bad beats )





    Poker Stars, $0.05/$0.10 No Limit Hold'em Cash, 6 Players
    Poker Tools Powered By Holdem Manager - The Ultimate Poker Software Suite. View Hand #37642337

    BTN: $7.02 (70.2 bb)
    SB: $10.15 (101.5 bb)
    BB: $10.04 (100.4 bb)
    UTG: $10 (100 bb)
    MP: $36.26 (362.6 bb)
    Hero (CO): $13.12 (131.2 bb)

    Preflop: Hero is CO with 9 9
    UTG raises to $0.28, MP folds, Hero calls $0.28, 3 folds

    Flop: ($0.71) 2 9 7 (2 players)
    UTG bets $0.45, Hero calls $0.45

    Turn: ($1.61) 5 (2 players)
    UTG bets $1.15, Hero calls $1.15

    River: ($3.91) A (2 players)
    UTG bets $2.20, Hero raises to $8.61, UTG calls $5.92 and is all-in

    Spoiler:



    Get the Flash Player to use the Hold'em Manager Replayer.






      Poker Stars, $0.05/$0.10 No Limit Hold'em Cash, 6 Players
      Poker Tools Powered By Holdem Manager - The Ultimate Poker Software Suite. View Hand #37642338

      BTN: $28.68 (286.8 bb)
      SB: $10 (100 bb)
      BB: $10.15 (101.5 bb)
      UTG: $17.38 (173.8 bb)
      MP: $10.25 (102.5 bb)
      Hero (CO): $10.05 (100.5 bb)

      Preflop: Hero is CO with 7 7
      2 folds, Hero raises to $0.25, 2 folds, BB raises to $0.60, Hero calls $0.35

      Flop: ($1.25) 4 3 T (2 players)
      BB bets $0.74, Hero calls $0.74

      Turn: ($2.73) T (2 players)
      BB checks, Hero checks

      River: ($2.73) 7 (2 players)
      BB bets $8.81 and is all-in, Hero calls $8.71 and is all-in

      Spoiler:



      Get the Flash Player to use the Hold'em Manager Replayer.





        Poker Stars, $0.05/$0.10 No Limit Hold'em Cash, 6 Players
        Poker Tools Powered By Holdem Manager - The Ultimate Poker Software Suite. View Hand #37642339

        BTN: $19.52 (195.2 bb)
        Hero (SB): $13.10 (131 bb)
        BB: $12.58 (125.8 bb)
        UTG: $8.81 (88.1 bb)
        MP: $23.58 (235.8 bb)
        CO: $28.14 (281.4 bb)

        Preflop: Hero is SB with 4 4
        4 folds, Hero raises to $0.29, BB calls $0.19

        Flop: ($0.58) 5 9 Q (2 players)
        Hero checks, BB checks

        Turn: ($0.58) 4 (2 players)
        Hero bets $0.42, BB calls $0.42

        River: ($1.42) Q (2 players)
        Hero bets $1.15, BB raises to $3.10, Hero raises to $12.39 and is all-in, BB calls $8.77 and is all-in

        Spoiler:



        Get the Flash Player to use the Hold'em Manager Replayer.







          Poker Stars, $0.05/$0.10 No Limit Hold'em Cash, 6 Players
          Poker Tools Powered By Holdem Manager - The Ultimate Poker Software Suite. View Hand #37642341

          BTN: $5.02 (50.2 bb)
          Hero (SB): $17.15 (171.5 bb)
          BB: $10 (100 bb)
          UTG: $10 (100 bb)
          MP: $9.78 (97.8 bb)
          CO: $8.40 (84 bb)

          Preflop: Hero is SB with T T
          UTG raises to $0.30, MP folds, CO calls $0.30, BTN folds, Hero calls $0.25, BB folds

          Flop: ($1) 3 T 4 (3 players)
          Hero checks, UTG checks, CO checks

          Turn: ($1) 4 (3 players)
          Hero checks, UTG checks, CO bets $0.50, Hero calls $0.50, UTG folds

          River: ($2) 8 (2 players)
          Hero checks, CO bets $4.70, Hero raises to $13.41, CO calls $2.90 and is all-in

          Spoiler:



          Get the Flash Player to use the Hold'em Manager Replayer.







            Poker Stars, $0.05/$0.10 No Limit Hold'em Cash, 6 Players
            Poker Tools Powered By Holdem Manager - The Ultimate Poker Software Suite. View Hand #37642342

            BTN: $10.06 (100.6 bb)
            SB: $10 (100 bb)
            BB: $2.33 (23.3 bb)
            UTG: $6.55 (65.5 bb)
            Hero (MP): $14.68 (146.8 bb)
            CO: $4.76 (47.6 bb)

            Preflop: Hero is MP with Q Q
            UTG raises to $0.30, Hero calls $0.30, 2 folds, SB raises to $1.20, BB folds, UTG calls $0.90, Hero raises to $3.55, SB folds, UTG raises to $6.55 and is all-in, Hero calls $3

            Flop: ($14.40) K 9 3 (2 players, 1 is all-in)
            Turn: ($14.40) J (2 players, 1 is all-in)
            River: ($14.40) 9 (2 players, 1 is all-in)

            Spoiler:



            Get the Flash Player to use the Hold'em Manager Replayer.




            They're just some of the ones I marked there's like 10x as many, all very similar in how they played out. Yesterday was exactly the same. Took an hours break and decided to 2 table some 16nl (properly rolled) for my last hour of the day. Within 10 minutes:





              Poker Stars, $0.08/$0.16 No Limit Hold'em Cash, 6 Players
              Poker Tools Powered By Holdem Manager - The Ultimate Poker Software Suite. View Hand #37642340

              BTN: $14.70 (91.9 bb)
              Hero (SB): $22.58 (141.1 bb)
              BB: $29.71 (185.7 bb)
              UTG: $18.08 (113 bb)
              MP: $15.21 (95.1 bb)
              CO: $16 (100 bb)

              Preflop: Hero is SB with A A
              UTG raises to $0.48, 3 folds, Hero raises to $1.76, BB folds, UTG raises to $18.08, Hero calls $16.32

              Flop: ($36.32) Q 8 K (2 players)
              Turn: ($36.32) T (2 players)
              River: ($36.32) T (2 players)

              Spoiler:



              Get the Flash Player to use the Hold'em Manager Replayer.


              It has to stop eventually, right? Or maybe I'm just that 0.0001% that runs bad forever. The way life's gone up until now I wouldn't be at all surprised. Anyway, that's my whinging out the way. Back up bright and early tomorrow for another 8 hours of getting battered.
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              Old 02-18-2017, 08:21 PM   #29
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Lol at my last post Anyway, a higher power must've read it and taken pity on me because shortly afterwards I fired up another session (#degenerate) and people were just throwing money at me. Annoyed that I played longer than planned but pleased with the result. Back tomorrow with a poker update for this week.
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              Old 02-19-2017, 01:01 PM   #30
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Aaaaand we follow up our biggest winning session with our biggest loser Dunno what it is about Sunday's but apparently I can't play poker on them. Spewing so much today so just gonna take the day off and then come back fresh on Tuesday. Here was the week before today:



              And then after today:



              What's going on with that red line lol?!

              Still seem to be stuck in the same cycle of crushing half the time and spewing the other half. Just need to find a way to rid myself of the latter once and for all... Played 51 hours this week so I'm please with that at least. And I'm better off now than when the week started so could always be worse. Also, I made goldstar and it's looking like I'll probably make Platinum providing I don't have to drop back down. Built up $125 in StarsCoins which I'll be looking to cash in as soon as PokerStars sort their **** out. So, including that, the bankroll stands at a little over $630. Shame it's not the $760 it was 2 hours ago but there you go lol.
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              Old 02-20-2017, 08:46 AM   #31
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Right, it's no good me keep saying "I need to stop x,y,z" and then doing the same thing the following week so I've taken some initiative and done a few things I should've done a while back. I've gone through TiltBreaker with a fine tooth comb and put in a place a few rules that I think will keep me on track.



              These are the first of 'em. I ran the reports and they're saying that my winrate starts to drop after 2 hours so I've set that as my max session length. When I hit 2 hours it sits me out next BB and I'm unable to play for 20 minutes - plenty of time to go to the toilet/grab something to eat and come back fresh. I also get kicked off for 20 minutes if I lose/win 5 BI's in a session. I suffer from winner's tilt as much as I do loser's and make some really loose/spewy plays when I win a lot of BI's in a short space of time so this should help to nip that in the bud.

              Next I've added these:


              This is the one I should've had locked in from day one. I've set the max number of cash tables I can have open at any one time to 2 and locked that bad boy in for 2 weeks. That means for the next 2 weeks I'm literally forced to play 2 tables with no way to bypass or get around it. I see this as a trial period and if it goes well then I'll lock it in for a lot longer next time, probably like 3-6 months. Lastly I've blocked the cashier during sessions. This isn't too important as I can still check HEM if I really wanted to but the option was there so I thought I might as well. Also locked in for 2 weeks.



              I've also designated one of the buttons on my mouse as a tilt button. If I feel emotions bubbling up and I'm unable to get 'em in check in time then I can just rage click the button before I can do any damage. Again, this sits me out next hand and stops me playing for 20 minutes.

              Finally, I've set myself a load of rules like I had in my previous challenge. I've gone through my database and tried to pick out the spots that are costing me the most money and then wrote a couple on sentences on each on how to fix 'em.They're pretty primative - I.e If X villain does Y, we do Z. They take up a sheet of A4 and I'm just repeating them over and over trying to burn them into my subconscious. Of course there's gonna be a few smaller pots I'm forced to pass up on, but I feel as though these will be dwarfed by the spewed stacks I'll save myself in the long run.

              As you can tell by the amount of changes I've already made in such a short space of time, I have a tendancy to revert back to old habits. I just need to stay mindful of this and keep reminding myself why I'm doing all this in the first place. So, just to recap, my week's looking something like this:

              Tuesday-Sunday: Wake up -> Shower -> Meditate -> Breakfast -> Study (1 hour) -> 4 x 2 hour sessions throughout the day with a workout and lunch somewhere in between -> Update.

              Monday: Day off
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              Old 02-21-2017, 06:54 PM   #32
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Played the full 8 hours today. Messed up with locking in 2 tables max on TiltBreaker cos now I can't open the replayer whilst play 2. I must've clicked on it 20 times today before it finally sunk in lol. It's a little awkward cos I can't take notes on people like I usually do but it's only 2 weeks so I'm sure I'll be fine. Much prefer the 4 x 2 hour sessions over 2 x 4 hour sessions so gonna keep it like this for a while.
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              Old 02-21-2017, 11:15 PM   #33
              Silentb0b
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Maybe check the hand in hem replayer and make the note in windows note (inception yo) program ans include the players name. Once you see the bastard take the note. Maybe a bit stoneaegish approach but hard times need different tactics.
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              Old 02-22-2017, 06:03 AM   #34
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Silentb0b View Post
              Maybe check the hand in hem replayer and make the note in windows note (inception yo) program ans include the players name. Once you see the bastard take the note. Maybe a bit stoneaegish approach but hard times need different tactics.
              Ye this is what I was thinking (but making notecaddy notes in HEM). I found out I can open the text HH in stars just not the visual replayer, so I can still see what they had in real time it's just a bit clunky. I guess it's why they tell you to test your rules before you lock em in. Just glad I didn't lock it in for longer The Pursuit Of HappYness
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              Old 02-22-2017, 07:25 AM   #35
              Vai123
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              I read all thread and I cant see where your happyness is at, where are you trying to find it? What is your goal?
              What will make you happy, playing poker - zoom tables on pokerstars.com?
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              Old 02-22-2017, 11:52 AM   #36
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

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              Originally Posted by Vai123 View Post
              I read all thread and I cant see where your happyness is at, where are you trying to find it? What is your goal?
              What will make you happy, playing poker - zoom tables on pokerstars.com?
              There is no happiness yet, I'm pursuing it! I'll find happiness in being able to support myself doing something I enjoy/don't hate. At the moment that's poker. If and when I time comes it ceases to be poker, then I'll move on to the next thing. I made a vow to myself a long time ago that I wouldn't spend the better part of my life doing something I hate just to survive.

              So ye, I guess playing poker will make me happy. Not directly, because like all things done to excess - it becomes tedious. It's more the life it'll allow me to live. It's unique in the freedom it offers. What I'm doing with my life now might not be (and probably isn't) the best thing for me in terms EV. However, it's what I want to be doing and I think that's the first and most important step on the road to happiness - to ask yourself what it is you want and then to start working towards it.

              In terms of my goals, I'd like to be a winner at 100nlz at the very least by the end of the year. Thanks for the questions it did me good to remind myself of some of that stuff
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              Old 02-22-2017, 12:47 PM   #37
              4bet20x
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Man, idk if I could give up smoking. That seems -EV to me.
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              Old 02-22-2017, 03:03 PM   #38
              Freedom Grinder
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Yo man, I am bringing some positivity to your thread. After reading, it seems like the direction of our threads are similar. Congratulations on traveling the path best taken; true happiness.
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              Old 02-22-2017, 04:57 PM   #39
              Silentb0b
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Have you read any books that deal with mindset? For example Mental Game of Poker or Poker Mindset.
              What is your study vs play ratio? What materials are you studing?

              And btw i find that "there is no happiness yet" sentence really depressing. That the type of mindset "once i reach x and y then i'll be happy", good old future. Once you reach em you have bigger and better goals to reach and happiness will stay one step ahead of you. Dunno, maybe flawed logic by me, i just think this way.

              Last edited by Silentb0b; 02-22-2017 at 05:03 PM.
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              Old 02-22-2017, 05:20 PM   #40
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

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              Originally Posted by Freedom Grinder View Post
              Yo man, I am bringing some positivity to your thread. After reading, it seems like the direction of our threads are similar. Congratulations on traveling the path best taken; true happiness.
              Thanks bud, and true that!
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              Old 02-22-2017, 05:32 PM   #41
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Silentb0b View Post
              Have you read any books that deal with mindset? For example Mental Game of Poker or Poker Mindset.
              What is your study vs play ratio? What materials are you studing?

              And btw i find that "there is no happiness yet" sentence really depressing. That the type of mindset "once i reach x and y then i'll be happy", good old future. Once you reach em you have bigger and better goals to reach and happiness will stay one step ahead of you. Dunno, maybe flawed logic by me, i just think this way.

              Ye I've read the mental game of poker and I've got the 2nd one as an audiobook. Clearly I need to revisit them though! I'd say it's like 90% playing. This isn't by design but it just kind of happens, a sign of a weak mental game again. At the moment, for active studying, I'm working my way through The Grinders Manual again and going through some of Carroter's series' from DC. Gonna own up and admit to half arsing it though. Most of the time I squeeze in half an hour of a stream or something as my day's "studying". I kinda know I'm not putting in the work in this regard so gonna make an effort from now to bring it up to par.

              And about the happiness thing I think you missed the intent. I was saying it as more of a joke 'cos they guy was like "where's the happiness" You're spot on in what you're saying. Plus life's notoriously random so it's a dangerous thing to have your happiness depend on something that can be taken away from you like money, health etc... I feel like my aspirations are pretty humble - "to be able to support myself doing something I enjoy/don't hate".

              Last edited by flawz01; 02-22-2017 at 05:48 PM.
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              Old 02-22-2017, 05:44 PM   #42
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Quote:
              Originally Posted by 4bet20x View Post
              Man, idk if I could give up smoking. That seems -EV to me.
              Mate I'm actually starting to think it may well be -EV for me at the moment. I'm not sleeping properly. I'm having mood swings. I also genuinely think I'm playing worse poker than when I was smoking. I reckon most of it comes down to the withdrawals rather than the weed doing anything special for me. I just don't feel like myself really and that's the only thing that's changed aside from eating better, working out and meditating. And I don't reckon any of those 3 are having a negative impact. Poker's stressful at the best of times and trying to give up the 10 year habit alongside 10 hour days is kinda breaking me to be honest. Definitely got some thinking to do over the next couple of days. I need to prioritise I think and do them one at time. So either I need to take a few weeks out from poker to give up weed properly, or put giving up on hold for a while whilst I try and get somewhere with the pokerz. Hmm...
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              Old 02-22-2017, 05:57 PM   #43
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Sorry to reply individually I'm not sure how to multi-quote (will do a search after this). I'm actually really regretting locking in 2 tables. I don't care if I'm supposed to play better or focus more playing less tables, the truth is I don't. Again, this could just be down to withdrawals from not smoking but I feel so much more at ease with 4, how I've played 99% of my lifetime's volume. Unfortunately it's locked in for 2 weeks now so there's not much I can do. Maybe now would be a good time to put poker on hold for a few weeks and commit to giving up smoking properly without the added stress of playing long days. I dunno, all this tryna sort your life out **** is new to me I'm kind of winging it . Gonna have a good think about things tonight and I'll update with my decision in the morning.
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              Old 02-22-2017, 05:58 PM   #44
              Silentb0b
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Had a studying problem as well. Found an amazing cafe with superb coffee. Made it my study station. Always worked through 1 hour of video material. Had a notebook where i made notes by hand. Sometimes even wrote half a page of text of what the teacher had said, detailed HH, etc... Eventually i got do used to it that every time i went there it was game on.

              So my advice for you is to find a place where you only study. Obv it might be hard if you don't own a laptop, tablet or a big screen phone. I used my phone every time and it worked wonderfully.
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              Old 02-22-2017, 06:16 PM   #45
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Silentb0b View Post
              Had a studying problem as well. Found an amazing cafe with superb coffee. Made it my study station. Always worked through 1 hour of video material. Had a notebook where i made notes by hand. Sometimes even wrote half a page of text of what the teacher had said, detailed HH, etc... Eventually i got do used to it that every time i went there it was game on.

              So my advice for you is to find a place where you only study. Obv it might be hard if you don't own a laptop, tablet or a big screen phone. I used my phone every time and it worked wonderfully.
              Hmm that sounds like a pretty good way to tackle the problem. Trouble is I'm prone to anxiety when I'm around a lot of people so I don't feel like I'd be fully focused on the studying. I suppose I could use that same logic but instead use another room in the house, say the dining room. That way it keeps poker and studying seperate and I wont be tempted to fire up tables prematurely 'cos I wont even be in the same room. I'll give it a go from tomorrow and I'll let ya know how I get on. Cheers mate
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              Old 02-22-2017, 10:50 PM   #46
              Silentb0b
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Anytime bro!
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              Old 02-23-2017, 07:12 AM   #47
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Right, I've made my decision and I'm gonna put giving up weed on the back-burner for a while. It's probably not the best one, but it'll hopefully help to alleviate some of the stress I've been under. Trouble is, I've still been having the occasional joint every day or 2 in the evening so my body's not really getting a chance to get over it. Every day is basically the first day of giving up. So, the plan's to slowly ween myself off of it by rolling smaller joints and smoking less frequently.

              I'm also switching up the schedule because I wasn't putting in anywhere near enough time studying. So for the foreseeable future I'm gonna be splitting my time 50/50 between playing and studying. 3 hours will be working on my technical game (including 1 hour session review) and the other hour will be devoted to working on my mental game. I'm gonna spend my day today setting out an exact study plan but I have a rough idea of what I'm going to be doing. For the technical side of things I'll be working my way through The Grinder's Manual and writing it up into my own words. At the end of every section when it gives examples for you to work through, I'll be adding a further 20 examples from my own database to solidify what I've learnt.

              For the mental side of things, I'll be working my way through TMGOP, again condensing it and putting it into my own words. Schedule in terms of poker will look something like this: 1 hour technical -> 1 hour mental -> 2 hour session -> 1 hour technical -> 2 hour session -> 1 hour session/mental game review. I'll still be doing all the other stuff before, during and after. I'm going to take today off to devise a proper schedule so I'm not just aimlessly reading through books with no direction. I'm also not going to be smoking anything until after the first 2 hour session's done. This'll allow me to monitor how smoking affects my focus, both studying and playing, by comparing the morning and afternoon sessions over time.
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              Old 02-23-2017, 07:31 AM   #48
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Also, the other day I was gonna start including any pot where I lost more than >100bb with my daily updates, but then I pussied out. I know I'm prone to spew and so pre-empted the torrent of ridicule from everyone at my terrible plays. What's the alternative though, spewing in secret to avoid the embarassment? That doesn't seem like it's doing me any favours in the long run so **** it: My name's George and I'm a spewer From now on I'll be including every ~200bb pot that I lost, spew, coolers and all in the hopes it'll add some accountability to my actions. Plus, at the very least, it should provide some entertainment .
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              Old 02-24-2017, 03:30 AM   #49
              4bet20x
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Quote:
              Originally Posted by flawz01 View Post
              Mate I'm actually starting to think it may well be -EV for me at the moment. I'm not sleeping properly. I'm having mood swings. I also genuinely think I'm playing worse poker than when I was smoking. I reckon most of it comes down to the withdrawals rather than the weed doing anything special for me. I just don't feel like myself really and that's the only thing that's changed aside from eating better, working out and meditating. And I don't reckon any of those 3 are having a negative impact. Poker's stressful at the best of times and trying to give up the 10 year habit alongside 10 hour days is kinda breaking me to be honest. Definitely got some thinking to do over the next couple of days. I need to prioritise I think and do them one at time. So either I need to take a few weeks out from poker to give up weed properly, or put giving up on hold for a while whilst I try and get somewhere with the pokerz. Hmm...
              I just don't think it's as impactful as people think...but, I could be a bit biased. I'm also bipolar and I think it helps me with my mood swings, but again, that very well could just be a mental thing.
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              Old 02-24-2017, 06:33 AM   #50
              flawz01
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              Re: The Pursuit Of HappYness

              Quote:
              Originally Posted by 4bet20x View Post
              I just don't think it's as impactful as people think...but, I could be a bit biased. I'm also bipolar and I think it helps me with my mood swings, but again, that very well could just be a mental thing.
              Na I totally understand what you mean. I think a lot of people just use it as a scapegoat to be honest. Like lazy people will attribute their laziness to weed, stupid people will claim it made them that way when utimately we still make our own decisions. The trouble is, I've never given up for longer than a month so I can't really make a fair comparison. The only times I haven't been smoking I've been plagued by withdrawals (mood swings, restlessness, insomnia) so I don't really know how it'd feel to be completely sober. For me, in terms of poker, it has the following effects: I can play longer sessions and remain more emotionally detached throughout. As far as I'm aware I don't play better or worse, it just feels easier. It's outside of poker it bothers me most. I'm far more easily disracted and I'll often waste a few hours in the day procrastinating between doing the things I should be doing. Also my diet kind of goes out the window. I'm drawn to things that are instantly gratifying (sweets etc) as oppose to the healthier option. I feel like this has more of an impact on mood and productivity than the weed itself to be honest. I cut sugar completely out of my diet for a month last year and it's the most clear headed I can ever remember feeling. I just need to be mindful of the effects weed has on me and make an extra effort in the areas it impacts negatively.

              Right, yesterday was a bit hectic. For the past 6 months or so my laptop's been unable to connect via WiFi so I've had to plug in my 4G device via the USB to get internet. It doesn't sound like too big a deal but you'd be surprised at the amount of things it stops you doing. First there's the obvious of not being able to connect to any other networks when I'm out and about but there's also loads of little things that have popped up over the months. It means I can't sync any other devices with my laptop (printer, phone etc) and can't use apps like mobile mouse or anything. Anyway, after spending another 3 hours trying to sort it last night to no avail, I lost my **** and did a complete reset along with a fresh install of Windows.

              The good news is my computer's running nice and quick. The bad news is that in my sleepy state I missed backing up a load of stuff that I should've - all my pokerstars notes/colours being one of the ones that annoyed me most. The worst part about it is that all this didn't even solve the WiFi problem! I did eventually manage to sort it (at ~4am after about 20 cumulative hours trying to fix the poxy thing) by reverting the network adapter driver back to Windows 7 (even though I'm running 8.1 - nicely done Windows...). I tried to get everything re-installed and all my settings re-instated so I could start fresh today but it was proper time consuming. Got most of the important stuff done at least but didn't get to sleep until around 5am, only to be woke up at 8.30 by next door's dog barking .

              The fruits of all my labour:


              So, plan for today is to finish up with the installs/tinkering to get everything how it should be. Hope to get it all done within the next few hours and then I'll spend the latter part of my day doing some relaxed studying. Ended up reading through 1/3 of TMGOP unintentionally yesterday but I'm gonna start it fresh when I begin my focused study sessions. I'd forgotten loads of it since I read it last - inchworm, accumulated emotion etc and it all came flooding back. It was actually some of this stuff that helped me to overcome my gambling addicition all those years ago. Like I never used to get why I'd lose my **** so quick when I'd lose just a spin or 2 on roulette and the section on accumulated emotion really helped me to better understand what was going on in my head at these times.

              Also, I bought a printer yesterday so I can start compiling my own versions of the books I'm to be studying from. It's taken me nearly 40 minutes to write all this up. I'm knackered, my eyes are stinging, but I'm full to the brim with positivity. I feel like I've taken a big step forward with some of the more recent changes I've made and I'm looking forward to seeing how my journey progresses over the coming months.

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