I am going to begin this by saying this post is not for sympathy. I really am quite lost when it comes to poker and I am looking for some advice when it comes to figuring it out.

I am only 19 years old with a bankroll that is comfortable and uncomfortable at the same time. I have been playing poker for about 5 years but I began taking it very seriously about a year ago. I find myself extremely passionate about the game and spend almost all of my free time developing my game in various ways. I don't believe I am naturally gifted at the game of poker but I have made some major strides as far as developing my skill. As a US player that is under 21, I am extremely limited in where I can play as far as online goes. I have discovered a few different home games in my area that I play in (3-5 times a week), as well as taking a 3.5 hour drive up to a casino that allows 18 year olds to play for a weekend once or twice a month.

Getting to the point, I am making this post because my bankroll was climbing very fast and got to an extremely comfortable point, and even though I am playing in the same exact games I have seen it completely deplete in the last three months back to almost where I started. And I can remember so many of the hands that have cost me a lot of money.

Quads over Quads.
Nut Flush vs Straight Flush
Flopped Top Set Vs Flopped Flush
Flopped top set vs flopped straight
Flop top two vs K's runner runner to pair board
Getting called off by a donk with a gutshot on the turn and they hit it. (this has happened twice and the most tilting of them all)

Those are just the hands I can remember but I feel like I have accumulated more bad beats in these past few months than some have in years. (Let me know if I am wrong?)

Anyways, I am really confused right now about where I am headed in my poker career. I am able to handle these beats in a positive way. I am someone who works really hard on my mental game (including a lot of positive thinking and meditation), but having a downswing like this at my age can't be healthy and I am wondering if all of the time I have spent studying the game of poker is just a waste.

I love the game but I really am at a cross-roads. I don't know if I am good, bad, unlucky. I just have no clue. I feel like I am a solid player that plays in plus EV games but I can't really figure out if that is true with the amounts I have been losing lately. I am wondering, without costing myself more money in the game of poker, how do I figure out which one of these categories I fall in? Should I stop spending so much time trying to improve?

I feel like my results could be just a rough stretch of bad luck that is carrying on for a while, but I keep waiting for things to turn around and nothing is happening. It is quite frustrating and it has me contemplating a lot at an age where maybe I should be more so focusing on enjoying life instead of poker.

Thanks for the replies.