Solicited Advice is more about mental health topics

http://solicitedadvicepodcast.libsyn.com/

Sessions is more about poker and includes some of DGAF's life story

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcas...s/id1434478482

I've been on like a billion Tinder 1st dates so it's not too nerve-wracking. Still get slight butterflies right before meeting, but I think I'm a lot better at them than I was when I first began.

Those are all good questions. The nice thing about CDMX is that I'm spending about 40% of what I would if I were living in a desirable American city. The quality of life is better as well.

So it's easier to put some money aside for the future. As for post-poker, unfortunately I haven't put too much thought into it. Hoping the games stay grindable for at least 5-10 more years and I'll start to formulate an exit plan when I get an inkling that things are too tough.

For healthcare I just have a travel insurance plan through Nomad.

Cool, thanks!



Well, it was a weird week on the virtual felt. On the one hand, I worked hard and put in a ton of hours, roughly 60 hours, which is more than I put in most months last year. On the other hand, I think I exhausted myself to the point where I wasn't playing that great, but too fatigued to realize it, and the wheels came off at the end due to run bad and mediocre play.

I'm happy that I've rediscovered a bit of work ethic, which has been lacking, but I also learned an important lesson. You can work hard, but you also need to work smart. Chasing a goal just for the sake of chasing it doesn't make a lot of sense if you're sacrificing a bit of health and satisfaction, as well as the fact that you're not even playing that well.

Going forward I will need to find that proper balance between putting in the hours, but knowing when it's ok to push myself a bit more and knowing when I need to call it a session.

Here's my graph in dollars since mid-July. I was playing PLO 50 and 100 at the very bottom, to work my way out of the downswing, then added in PLO 200 about halfway up and then near the peak I added in PLO 500. I didn't run very well at PLO 500 and dropped 3 buyins there and probably won't take another shot until I build the BR back up. I'm hoping that in 2-3 months I can get to the point where I'm comfortable in those games, and then, sometime down the road, I'll tackle PLO 1000, but one step at a time.



I'm going to a lake tomorrow about 2 hours outside of CDMX called Tequesquitengo with my top FWB and I'm super excited. Should be nice having a couple days to completely forget about poker and relax in the sun. I think the fact that I'd be away from poker for 3.5 days caused me to push myself a bit more this week, but it may have been an ill-advised decision.

August Progress (Goal 150 hours): 90/150

I'm well on pace, but when I get back on the 15th I'd like to focus on putting in solid hours as opposed to just putting in empty hours.

Hey Fossil, do you have a set bankroll strategy? How do you decide to take shots? Are you always properly rolled at certain levels?


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Hey Bro! Im from mexico city too. i play short stack Cap games 2009-2017 and now play live NLHE. You should try to play on Omaha and Mata aces (kill aces) tables. If you have good bankroll there are very good tables with rich people at couple of casinos (Interlomas and Tecamachalco). Mata aces is a game similar to 7 card stud but only one hide card and with a flop but you can only take one card of the flop to your hand, is an easy semibluff/blockers/outs game

People at PLO and mataplay 90% of hands. Some regs play 60%+ hands from any position FR tables. Just FU crazy . the only down is the rake is high.

GL

I mostly choose levels based on how confident in my game I am. PLO50 and PLO100 are my base level and I always feel like I'm the best or one of the best there. So after my brutal downswing I went back there for awhile to get back on track. After last weekend where I pushed myself too much and lost a handful of buyins, I decided to resume play today at 50 and 100 and had a nice session.

I'm maybe slightly under-rolled for PLO500, but ok for the rest. I'll take shots at 500 when I'm feeling confident and have a decent run going at 200. Unfortunately last time I dropped a couple buyins, but hopefully one of these times I'll hit a nice little winning streak and be able to stick around at 500.

I did a bit of studying over the break and found several spots where I can be more aggro. I've been more on the tighter side, but for each decision instead of defaulting to a thought process of "better check here", I'm trying to talk myself into reasons for taking the more aggro route unless there's a compelling reason not to.

I would like to keep drilling this thought process until I get it to the unconscious competence level that Tendler talks about. I think my auto-pilot game is way too tight right now, and if I'm gonna be putting in occasional 40 or 50 hour weeks, then I'll probably need a sharp "auto-pilot" game. I'd say I can keep up my A-game for anywhere from 90 minutes to 3.5 hours depending on how I'm feeling that day, then I drop into B-game territory.

My first session back after the 4-day break was mostly 6-tabling at 50 and 100 with the idea in mind to fight for nearly every pot within reason and it felt incredible. I was picking my spots well and winning way more non-showdown pots than normal. I felt like I wasn't so reliant on needing to win my all-in hands to win overall b/c I was winning a lot more medium pots than normal.

Mil gracias por el consejo amigo. Is it PLO high or some kind of variant like PLO8 or 5-card PLO? I'd definitely be interested in live PLO high to change things up from time to time and those areas you mention are quite wealthy so I'd imagine there are some whales in those games.


WRT to my 4-day absence. On Monday morning I took a 2-hour bus ride with my top FWB to a lake called Tequesquitengo. The lake was a bit underwhelming, but our hotel was really nice and we also went to some pretty nice flower gardens (largest in the Americas supposedly) as well as the largest water park in the Americas, which was a ton of fun.

FWB has an insanely high appetite for sex as well as being very active in bed, so she kept me extremely satisfied. I really like this girl and she's a 10/10 in many ways so I had a more serious chat with her on the 2nd evening. We've known each other since late June and have met once a week every week (she always spends the night) except for a 4-night trip and this 3-night trip we've taken together.

So I asked where's she's at as far as our situation. I said I've been thinking about something more serious and asked where she's at. She said she's also thought a bit about something more, but still thinks it's a bit early. She made it clear though that she wants to keep seeing me and then towards the end of our chat she asked if I would like something serious and I said, we don't have to decide now. Now that I've brought it up, I'll let things rest and see if she brings it up again in the future. If not, I'll be happy seeing her once a week and then playing the field a bit when someone interesting pops up on Tinder.

I came back to Bumble after about a week absence and got a couple absurdly high quality matches. I haven't been too interested in meeting new girls lately, mostly just focusing on poker and seeing FWBs, but I would meet these girls in a heartbeat. Hopefully I can convert the messages into dating. Got a # for one and a couple messages in for the other.

Damn bro, nicely done!

one round of PLO, one or two rounds of Mata aces game. Juicy games with rich people (whales) and some bad regs. But u need to have big bankroll at least 50k. there are other table of only PLO at interlomas, but all the player buy in short (60bb)the first hours and when the stacks get deep only have a couple of hours before the table break down they play very loose preflop like 80% of hands and kind of a nit postflop. the good table are the first one.

How do you like to have your health insurance sorted out, FossilKid? Do you change it with each country that you go to or do you have a plan that covers that? Any recommendations or tips for a newbie?

This was a pretty good read. OP after BF did u go to NZ around 2012 and play a lot of live NL?

I just get a 3 or 6-month plan through WorldNomads and throw any countries I think I'll probably visit in there when I renew.

I went to NZ in Sept '11 and stayed for a year. Played basically 0 live apart from using some of my Stars VPPs on APPT main events in Queenstown and Sydney. I've never been much into live and even less so now that I've played only PLO for about 7 years and it's harder to find.

Graph for July/August:



Man it's been an insanely swingy couple months. I don't really remember another stretch I've had even close to the ups/downs of this one. It's been a bit too stressful and I've put in way too many hours of mindless grinding. I think in September I'm gonna drop down 1 stake and play 5-6 tables instead of 7-8. I feel like I've been way too undisciplined letting bad runs wear on me and just auto-piloting thousands of hands. There are a few strategy adjustments I'm trying to make, but haven't drilled them to the point of unconscious competence and I feel like my mental game can use a lot of work.

On the positive side: I did blow past my goal of 150 hours played this month at 161. I suppose it's something to be proud of as my volume hasn't been this high in a single month in a few years and I've been quite lazy this year and last. So it's nice to prove to myself that I can buckle down and grind when need be. Now I just need to find a happy medium where I'm still working hard, but not accumulating unneeded stress.

As for my personal life, it's getting quite serious with the girl who started as a FWB. I'm not sure how much I've mentioned about her ITT, but quite frankly, she's amazing. We surpassed the 3 month mark and I was starting to get feelings so ~2 weeks ago I asked her if she's thought about taking the next step. She seemed open to the idea, but not ready to commit just yet. Well, the following week she had an adorable way of wanting to take the next step. When we were lying in bed she says "Can I tell you something? I don't just like you, I reeeeally like you". (translation is a bit tricky cuz Spanish)

I could write a novel on the things I like about this girl, but I'll keep it short. She's 25 but has a very evolved outlook on life, seems much more mature that I was at that age (I'm 35 now). Really liberal, well thought out viewpoints on politics and life in general. She also doesn't seem to want kids, which I think is a plus for me. She's not the hottest girl in the world, but I find her very attractive and she looks great naked. And she's in incredible shape, she did the CDMX marathon last week.

Lastly, she's just incredible in the sack and has a motor that might surpass even mine. Just has an insatiable appetite, but just the right amount. She's gotten me to do things I didn't think were possible. (i.e. I finish inside of her, but am still so turned on I just keep going and finish again)

Most important of all, communication is top notch. We've discussed everything under the sun: past relationships, other sexual escapades, fantasies, etc. We've discussed a bit the idea of an open relationship. I'm on the fence, but feel like whatever we decide will work ok b/c the communication and openness is there and neither of us are jealous.

So yah, pretty excited to see where this goes. It will be nice to get out of the Tinder grind. Of course, the last week or 2 I've been tempted by some quality matches, but between poker and this girl, I haven't had the desire to meet another girl.

Goals for September are pretty optimistic, but I figure if I aim high and miss, I can still accomplish a lot.

I'd like to practice yoga daily and average 45 min. of meditation daily (I've never gone beyond 30 min. daily for a month).

Poker-wise, I'd be happy averaging 30 hours/week or 120 for the month.



A little congrats gift for completing the marathon. Balloon, gummies, chocolates, and stuffed animal. I've found the stuffed animal to be a great gift. This girl and past gf's have absolutely loved it and it will always be next to them in their bed reminding them of you.

Good stuff man -

I am fascinated with ppl who can do open relationships with girls they are legitimately into. I mean I can give zero f*cks about what else a girl I am banging is doing when I’m not around, but once the feelings start to come I could just never be ok with it being open. I think maybe it’s partly insecurity tho? I’d get jealous.

Anyways sounds like a great gal, I think Latin girls on average have better motors than girls from other parts of the world, plus are very loving, not demanding, etc. Love ‘em and al always will.

If you’re autogrinding and making mistakes, I’d drop tables immediately. You’ll get the habits ingrained quickly.

Nice balloon

GL

oh no, i liked the tall girl so much, she is head and shoulders above the others you shared

but congrats man, our voyeurism obviously a secondary priority for you

How loud is Mexico City when you're on the street/in your apartment? How's the pollution/air quality?

Does your internet ever drop?

Thanks OP. If you could PM me have a few more questions.

I'm far from an authority on open relationships. The closest I came was an ex-gf in Montréal. We set up an account on AdultFriendFinder and were looking for another sane couple that we could swap with. It was mostly a whole lot of nothing on the site, but we did find one couple who looked promising and my ex chatted with the woman for awhile and they seemed cool. So we set up a meeting for drinks and I wasn't into the girl and I don't think my ex was all that into the guy, so we didn't go any further. I broke up with my ex a month or 2 later, so we didn't pursue it beyond that.

It's an interesting concept though. My current girl and I are both intrigued by the idea. I think communication and honesty are absolutely essential for it to work, and I feel like we're both very solid in those areas. We're also not too jealous either and it's fun when you have a gf who isn't jealous and you can say things like "that girl/guy over there is pretty cute" "check out the tits on that girl" and noone gets offended. I know several relationships where you have to pretend like you don't notice attractive people around you, lest you offend your partner. It strikes me as not being true to one's self and maybe a relationship that isn't so stable.

Agree 100% on Latinas. I lived 2 years in France before México and the difference is pretty stark. Latinas just seem really fun and confident. They'll dole out compliments and make you feel like a king inside and outside the bedroom. Sometimes they get off on drama, so it can feel like a roller coaster, but this current girl has brought a lot of the good and zero of the bad, so I feel like I've found a unicorn.

I met the tall girl about a week ago. She's attractive, but not quite as hot in person. And the date went pretty well, but didn't leave me with the "omg I need to see her again" impression.

The Tinder stuff was fun for awhile, but starting to wear me down a bit, so I probably would have slowed down anyway.

CDMX is a loud city. Lots of cars honking, street vendors yelling, etc. It's definitely not for everyone. It's mitigated slightly in my apartment, b/c it's on the 9th floor, but I still hear a lot and usually get woken up at about 9AM by some street vendor. For me though, I like it. My life is pretty tranquil, yoga, meditation, and poker in the apartment, so I'm not outside all that often and when I leave the apartment I like the feeling of stepping out onto the street and the city feeling so vibrant and alive. It's a nice balance.

Pollution is fairly bad. I think comparable or slightly worse than a city like LA. It hasn't seemed to affect me as much though. I don't feel sick from it like others might.

Internet has been solid. A drop here and there, but nothing last more than maybe an hour.

All in all, I'm really happy to have found the city. It's my favorite in the Western Hemisphere (Montreal and San Francisco are 2 and 3 for reference). I love big cities and you got so much bang for your buck here compared to any decent American city and I absolutely love Latin Culture and the women.

Sure, feel free to PM me any ?s you have.

Fun anecdote that's probably NSFF (Not Suitable For Family) about the first date with current girl:

We met on Tinder right before I had a planned trip back to the USA. So we chatted off and on for a couple days and set up a dinner date for the first Friday evening after I returned.

We met in front of a shopping center and decided to grab a bite to eat and walked to a nearby restaurant. We chatted for a little while and quickly got into racier topics. At one point she actually leans in and kisses me! She's a great kisser and I'm enjoying the moment so we kiss and kiss and kiss. At some point the food arrives, but we just keep going. I think the food had been sitting on the table a good 20 or 30 minutes and we hadn't touched it so I say "I have an idea. Let's box up the food, go back to my place, and we can eat it later". She eagerly agrees and we walk 10 minutes back to my place. I think we finally got around to eating it at 1AM.

Not really a story for the parents though.

On the open-relationship front : I experienced it for 2+ years back when we were 20-22 years old and going to Uni in 2 different cities, hence only saw each other on the weekends. It worked fine for a year+, but then expectations change on one side or the other... Emotional attachments differ... As does the perspective of what is considered being unfaithful, or the limits of our freedom... It soon evolved into "you can sleep with any women, but not that one" when a girl was becoming a bit too clingy... And then when we finally moved in together, she asked for total fidelity henceforward. My conclusion : not sure it is very healthy for 2 lovers who love each other (almost) equally and who are looking for LTR.

Agree on CDMX, Montreal, San Fran being in top 4 in North American cities. I would sneak in Vancouver as well and switch up Montreal and CDMX, but am kinda buyest with the former

Thanks for the input bro. I think in theory in sounds great: "hey we can have this great relationship and at the same time be able to have little adventures on the side!"

But in practice it can probably get messy pretty quickly once different feelings are involved. And as you said, expectations are ever evolving as well.

Can't argue with putting MTL on top. I quite enjoyed my time there. I am a bit of a warm weather person though so I have to dock a couple points for the Winters being so tough to endure. It's definitely one of the most fun Summer cities in the world though.

Unfortunately I haven't been to Vancouver yet, but I am sure it would be on of my top cities in NA.

Man, sucks when you take a shot and just get destroyed by variance. I'm not even that mad, just disappointed to work my way up to taking a shot and it hasn't worked out yet in any of 4 attempts.

In 256 hands at 2/5 PLO tonight I got set over setted 2x and lost a 3rd stack when I flopped top set w/AAxx vs. AKxx and he was drawing to perfect-perfect running straight (4% chance) and got it.

Anyway, I've been having a debate with myself. I do quite well at 0.50/1 PLO and can grind out a nice hourly there with more than enough money left over to save each month, especially with how cheap CDMX is. It's also a very stress-free way of life as even a 50 or 60 buy-in downswing there doesn't really phase me emotionally. At 1/2 PLO it gets a bit dicier. I'm likely a small to decent winner there, but aggression ramps up a lot from 0.50/1 and as such the games can play very big and swings can be brutal. The losses during big downswings can affect my mood and add a bit of stress to my life.

And finally, at 2/5 PLO, I've been taking shots off and on, but haven't been able to stick there. If I game select and only choose the softer games, I'm confident I'm a winner there, and I like the challenge of a higher game and feel like it forces me to really focus on what I'm doing. OTOH, if it became one of my main stakes, I'm not really sure I could weather an extended downswing there emotionally or financially.

I guess it's the age old question of grind out a smaller stake you know you can crush or put in the work and take on much more risk and try to move up.

If I knew poker would remain a viable option for a little while longer, then I'd probably happily 8-table .50/1 PLO. OTOH, there's a ton of uncertainty with online poker. The popularity, the legality, the bot situation, etc. Part of me feels like I really need to take advantage of the (relative) cash cow while it's still possible.

Anyway, I'm thinking I'll play lower the rest of this month and see how it feels. I still need to work on the mental game a lot and get a consistent yoga and meditation practice going. Real meditation, not just 10 minutes a day. It will probably be very good for net life satisfaction, but maybe I'll get bored with poker as I won't really be challenging myself there.

It will always be possible to make a good living from poker if you’re capable of working hard, don’t worry about that man. I’d just keep grinding it out until you have a healthy roll for higher stakes. Tons of ppl make the mistake of shotting too soon and it can really ruin things, just be patient and then when you do move up the swings won’t bother you as bad and you’ll play better to boot.

My dudes I did it! Mini-breakthrough of sorts. After the last session at PLO500 I felt like I played well, just got unlucky. So I was itching for one last shot before I dropped down for awhile. I told myself I'd set a stop loss of 2 buyins. I started playing and got down about 1.5 buyins, then just started hitting everything in sight, and running a few bluffs that worked out nicely. I don't know why, but being 2.5x higher than my previous highest stake doesn't really scare me and in fact I think I get even more aggro. I'm certainly more focused on what I'm doing.

Anyway, ended up picking up nearly 8 buyins in just a couple hours there and am now a very slight lifetime winner! Sample is tiny, just 2700 hands, but it's nice to not get my arse kicked up there.

I'm still not sure if I want to stick around at 500 or drop down a bit where the stress is non-existent and iron out a few wrinkles in my game. Maybe 1 last shot with a 3 buyin stop-loss tomorrow, and if it doesn't go well, then I'll be content with this nice little runup I had.

Here's the garf since start of July. Total winnings are actually just over 5k, but you can barely even tell since I won too fast.

Niiiiice. Gl on your next shot up there!

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Been following the thread for awhile now goodjob mate. You playing on stars or no? What do you use for studying hands?

Google and reddit both say there's poker in Mexico City? Reddit says they get up to 10/20 usd and games run everyday which is wild to me...

Have you checked out any of the poker rooms? Do they get PLO? Even if they're bad the social aspect of live poker while visiting would be nice.

They are quite a lot of unsuspected games that run in places we would of never thought of... I was surprised in Lima as well as in Kenya, for instance...