This is very tough, writing this and admitting that variance has taken hold of me. It has changed my views of poker forever and has humbled me beyond what i thought possible to be perfectly honest. I had a friend 2 nights ago and ask me if he did something to me or said something to me that would cause me not to see or speak to him for weeks at a time. I told him, **** no buddy why would you even ask that? because i havent really heard from you or seen you since halloween. Two days before halloween i moved my BR over to ACR and got ahold of monker.






then this has been happening, over and over again, brick after brick, set after set and river after river. Ive only read about downswings like this, seen them on forums or listened to them being discussed in different videos over the years. 30 Bis here and there were really my extent of experience with this beast. Its difficult to come to the realization that your not as good as you think you are in the sense that NO ONE is immune and eventually, if you play enough hands, you will surely see how brutal it can be. Im making this thread to log my journey back to +EV. for the reason of if i ever forget ( which is highly unlikely) what it is like to be here, as well as to possibly show some guidance to someone else who is going through a similar swing.

dont even post "WeLl YoUr Ev LiNe Is GoInG DoWn So YoUr A LoSiNg PlAyEr"

that EV line is not the end-all be-all, it does not show the times you bet twice and setup a half pot shove on the river only to find your opponent has hit his miracle card and you get snapped off by a hand that should only outdraw you 5% but during this run its closer to 30 or 40%. it doesnt show the times you pot-control and get literally the worst possible runouts time and time again. i HAD about 4 years of hands (around 500k ) i just put on a new HDD that failed. i even tried going into linux and trying to save some of the data but was unsuccessful. I did get a new one for free because it was still under factory warranty and it fell under RMA. I also had about 50k hands on driveHUD but i those were lost as well, not due to the HDD but because i didnt read when i uninstalled it ( the update was causing issues, so i was told to uninstall and reinstall) so when you uninstall, theres a box " remove all data" that unfortunately removes HHs as well. lesson learned.

on to current.. moved to ACR and started at 50NL blitz. as you can see from the graph, my first 50k hands werent anything crazy but then the doom switch hit. you can see my SD winning have been flat ever since AND my NSD winnings have also been in steady decline. why? because of what i stated before. ive since moved down to 10nl blitz with around $850 bankroll. Its not really about the money, i can re-deposit no problem but why? Rake is the same at both stakes, around 6bb/100 not including rakeback so my plan is to play 10NL until my graph shows +EV then move to 50NL.
i will 2 table blitz and record a video of my play that will be posted here. i will try to play atleast one session per day. the audio will be **** becasue i have a **** mic, but ill do my best. Good luck to everyone at the tables!

FML..the donations continue..i recorded 2 of the 3 sessions and halfway through the 3rd session I realized my mic was on mute for the first 2 sessions so that's gay. scrap the videos for day1 and ill do them from now on. im going to post my 5 biggest winning and losing pots from this session because Im not going to post a 3 hour video with no audio.

heres the graph...

Top 5 losers..( actually 6)



Winning Poker, Hold'em No Limit - $0.05/$0.10 - 6 players
Hand delivered by Upswing Poker

UTG: $10.81 (108 bb)
MP: $12.64 (126 bb)
CO: $3.96 (40 bb)
BU: $14.55 (146 bb)
SB: $13.23 (132 bb)
BB (Hero): $13.43 (134 bb)

Pre-Flop: ($0.15) Hero is BB with Q♠ Q♥
1 fold, MP raises to $0.28, 3 players fold, Hero 3-bets to $0.94, MP calls $0.66

Flop: ($1.93) J♥ 8♦ 6♥ (2 players)
Hero bets $0.48, MP calls $0.48

Turn: ($2.89) 5♥ (2 players)
Hero checks, MP bets $1.96, Hero calls $1.96

River: ($6.81) K♣ (2 players)
Hero checks, MP bets $2, Hero calls $2

Total pot: $10.81 (Rake: $0.54)

Showdown:
MP shows 5♦ 6♦ (two pair, Sixes and Fives)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 23%, Flop: 25%, Turn: 64%, River: 100%)

BB (Hero) mucks Q♠ Q♥ (a pair of Queens)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 77%, Flop: 75%, Turn: 36%, River: 0%)

MP wins $10.27





Winning Poker, Hold'em No Limit - $0.05/$0.10 - 6 players
Hand delivered by Upswing Poker

UTG (Hero): $10.18 (102 bb)
MP: $10.00 (100 bb)
CO: $19.50 (195 bb)
BU: $12.62 (126 bb)
SB: $4.98 (50 bb)
BB: $21.75 (218 bb)

Pre-Flop: ($0.15) Hero is UTG with 9♣ 9♥
Hero raises to $0.35, 1 fold, CO calls $0.35, 1 fold, SB calls $0.30, BB 3-bets to $1.05, Hero calls $0.70, CO calls $0.70, SB calls $0.70

Flop: ($4.20) 5♥ 3♥ 9♦ (4 players)
SB checks, BB bets $3.15, Hero raises to $9.13 (all-in), 2 players fold, BB calls $5.98

Turn: ($22.46) 2♥ (2 players, 1 all-in)

River: ($22.46) K♥ (2 players, 1 all-in)

Total pot: $22.46 (Rake: $1.12)

Showdown:
UTG (Hero) shows 9♣ 9♥ (a flush, King high)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 53%, Flop: 74%, Turn: 23%, River: 0%)

BB shows A♥ Q♥ (a flush, Ace high)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 47%, Flop: 26%, Turn: 77%, River: 100%)

BB wins $21.34





Winning Poker, Hold'em No Limit - $0.05/$0.10 - 6 players
Hand delivered by Upswing Poker

UTG: $12.68 (127 bb)
MP: $9.98 (100 bb)
CO: $10.00 (100 bb)
BU: $4.11 (41 bb)
SB (Hero): $11.64 (116 bb)
BB: $10.23 (102 bb)

Pre-Flop: ($0.15) Hero is SB with Q♦ A♥
1 fold, MP calls $0.10, 1 fold, BTN calls $0.10, Hero raises to $0.55, 2 players fold, BTN calls $0.45

Flop: ($1.30) A♦ 6♣ 5♥ (2 players)
Hero bets $0.42, BTN raises to $2.56, Hero raises to $4.70, BTN calls $1 (all-in)

Turn: ($8.42) T♣ (2 players, 1 all-in)

River: ($8.42) 2♠ (2 players, 1 all-in)

Total pot: $8.42 (Rake: $0.42)

Showdown:
SB (Hero) shows Q♦ A♥ (a pair of Aces)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 62%, Flop: 25%, Turn: 18%, River: 0%)

BU shows 6♠ 5♦ (two pair, Sixes and Fives)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 38%, Flop: 75%, Turn: 82%, River: 100%)

BU wins $8





Winning Poker, Hold'em No Limit - $0.05/$0.10 - 6 players
Hand delivered by Upswing Poker

UTG: $10.00 (100 bb)
MP: $10.28 (103 bb)
CO: $10.99 (110 bb)
BU: $10.13 (101 bb)
SB: $8.25 (83 bb)
BB (Hero): $10.10 (101 bb)

Pre-Flop: ($0.15) Hero is BB with K♦ A♦
4 players fold, SB raises to $0.20, Hero 3-bets to $0.75, SB calls $0.55

Flop: ($1.50) 7♣ T♦ 8♦ (2 players)
SB bets $1.50, Hero raises to $4.87, SB calls $3.37

Turn: ($11.24) 8♠ (2 players)
SB bets $2.63 (all-in), Hero calls $2.63

River: ($16.50) Q♣ (2 players, 1 all-in)

Total pot: $16.50 (Rake: $0.82)

Showdown:
SB shows Q♠ J♣ (two pair, Queens and Eights)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 34%, Flop: 21%, Turn: 16%, River: 100%)

BB (Hero) shows K♦ A♦ (a pair of Eights)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 66%, Flop: 79%, Turn: 84%, River: 0%)

SB wins $15.68





Winning Poker, Hold'em No Limit - $0.05/$0.10 - 6 players
Hand delivered by Upswing Poker

UTG: $17.04 (170 bb)
MP: $5.74 (57 bb)
CO: $7.56 (76 bb)
BU: $17.08 (171 bb)
SB: $11.06 (111 bb)
BB (Hero): $18.55 (186 bb)

Pre-Flop: ($0.15) Hero is BB with 4♣ 4♥
2 players fold, CO raises to $0.30, 2 players fold, Hero calls $0.20

Flop: ($0.65) 4♦ 8♥ T♦ (2 players)
Hero checks, CO bets $0.48, Hero raises to $2.09, CO raises to $7.26 (all-in), Hero calls $5.17

Turn: ($15.17) 9♣ (2 players, 1 all-in)

River: ($15.17) Q♠ (2 players, 1 all-in)

Total pot: $15.17 (Rake: $0.75)

Showdown:
CO shows Q♦ Q♣ (three of a kind, Queens)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 81%, Flop: 14%, Turn: 14%, River: 100%)

BB (Hero) shows 4♣ 4♥ (three of a kind, Fours)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 19%, Flop: 86%, Turn: 86%, River: 0%)

CO wins $14.42





Winning Poker, Hold'em No Limit - $0.05/$0.10 - 6 players
Hand delivered by Upswing Poker

UTG: $14.19 (142 bb)
MP: $30.39 (304 bb)
CO: $13.48 (135 bb)
BU (Hero): $10.00 (100 bb)
SB: $10.15 (102 bb)
BB: $28.41 (284 bb)

Pre-Flop: ($0.15) Hero is BTN with A♥ Q♥
UTG raises to $0.20, MP 3-bets to $0.80, 1 fold, Hero calls $0.80, 2 players fold, UTG calls $0.60

Flop: ($2.55) 3♥ 6♠ J♥ (3 players)
UTG checks, MP bets $1.50, Hero raises to $5.66, UTG folds, MP raises to $9.82, Hero calls $3.54 (all-in)

Turn: ($20.95) 5♣ (2 players, 1 all-in)

River: ($20.95) 3♠ (2 players, 1 all-in)

Total pot: $20.95 (Rake: $1.04)

Showdown:
MP shows 9♥ 9♣ (two pair, Nines and Threes)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 53%, Flop: 48%, Turn: 68%, River: 100%)

BU (Hero) shows A♥ Q♥ (a pair of Threes)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 47%, Flop: 52%, Turn: 32%, River: 0%)

MP wins $19.91

Top 5 winners...



Winning Poker, Hold'em No Limit - $0.05/$0.10 - 6 players
Hand delivered by Upswing Poker

UTG (Hero): $10.35 (104 bb)
MP: $10.03 (100 bb)
CO: $12.81 (128 bb)
BU: $4.85 (49 bb)
SB: $1.52 (15 bb)
BB: $4.56 (46 bb)

Pre-Flop: ($0.15) Hero is UTG with T♣ J♣
Hero raises to $0.35, MP calls $0.35, CO calls $0.35, 3 players fold

Flop: ($1.20) 3♠ J♦ 4♦ (3 players)
Hero bets $0.60, MP folds, CO calls $0.60

Turn: ($2.40) K♥ (2 players)
Hero bets $1.20, CO calls $1.20

River: ($4.80) Q♠ (2 players)
Hero checks, CO bets $1.20, Hero calls $1.20

Total pot: $7.20 (Rake: $0.36)

Showdown:
CO shows 8♦ 9♦ (high card, King)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 36%, Flop: 38%, Turn: 20%, River: 0%)

UTG (Hero) shows T♣ J♣ (a pair of Jacks)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 64%, Flop: 62%, Turn: 80%, River: 100%)

UTG (Hero) wins $6.84





Winning Poker, Hold'em No Limit - $0.05/$0.10 - 6 players
Hand delivered by Upswing Poker

UTG: $12.24 (122 bb)
MP: $10.69 (107 bb)
CO: $12.06 (121 bb)
BU: $13.98 (140 bb)
SB (Hero): $13.01 (130 bb)
BB: $4.00 (40 bb)

Pre-Flop: ($0.15) Hero is SB with 7♣ 7♠
3 players fold, BTN raises to $0.28, Hero 3-bets to $0.99, 1 fold, BTN calls $0.71

Flop: ($2.08) 2♣ 7♦ 7♥ (2 players)
Hero bets $0.52, BTN raises to $1.44, Hero calls $0.92

Turn: ($4.96) 6♦ (2 players)
Hero checks, BTN bets $1.49, Hero calls $1.49

River: ($7.94) 8♥ (2 players)
Hero bets $1.58, BTN calls $1.58

Total pot: $11.10 (Rake: $0.55)

Showdown:
SB (Hero) shows 7♣ 7♠ (four of a kind, Sevens)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 19%, Flop: >99%, Turn: 100%, River: 100%)

BU mucks 9♦ 9♥ (two pair, Nines and Sevens)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 81%, Flop: <1%, Turn: 0%, River: 0%)

SB (Hero) wins $10.55





Winning Poker, Hold'em No Limit - $0.05/$0.10 - 6 players
Hand delivered by Upswing Poker

UTG: $10.00 (100 bb)
MP: $2.21 (22 bb)
CO (Hero): $10.66 (107 bb)
BU: $3.43 (34 bb)
SB: $10.38 (104 bb)
BB: $17.99 (180 bb)

Pre-Flop: ($0.15) Hero is CO with T♥ T♣
2 players fold, Hero raises to $0.35, 1 fold, SB 3-bets to $1.15, 1 fold, Hero calls $0.80

Flop: ($2.40) J♥ T♠ 2♣ (2 players)
SB bets $1.20, Hero calls $1.20

Turn: ($4.80) J♦ (2 players)
SB checks, Hero bets $1.75, SB calls $1.75

River: ($8.30) 7♠ (2 players)
SB checks, Hero bets $6.56 (all-in), SB folds

Total pot: $8.30 (Rake: $0.41)
CO (Hero) wins $7.89





Winning Poker, Hold'em No Limit - $0.05/$0.10 - 6 players
Hand delivered by Upswing Poker

UTG: $10.35 (104 bb)
MP: $8.80 (88 bb)
CO: $7.97 (80 bb)
BU: $26.16 (262 bb)
SB: $16.75 (168 bb)
BB (Hero): $15.29 (153 bb)

Pre-Flop: ($0.15) Hero is BB with 4♣ 2♣
3 players fold, BTN raises to $0.25, SB calls $0.20, Hero calls $0.15

Flop: ($0.75) 6♦ 8♦ 2♠ (3 players)
SB checks, Hero checks, BTN checks

Turn: ($0.75) 4♦ (3 players)
SB bets $0.75, Hero raises to $1.87, BU folds, SB calls $1.12

River: ($4.49) 9♣ (2 players)
SB checks, Hero checks

Total pot: $4.49 (Rake: $0.22)

Showdown:
BB (Hero) shows 4♣ 2♣ (two pair, Fours and Twos)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 39%, Flop: 73%, Turn: 82%, River: 100%)

SB shows Q♦ K♠ (high card, King)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 61%, Flop: 27%, Turn: 18%, River: 0%)

BB (Hero) wins $4.27





Winning Poker, Hold'em No Limit - $0.05/$0.10 - 6 players
Hand delivered by Upswing Poker

UTG: $4.51 (45 bb)
MP: $10.00 (100 bb)
CO: $16.36 (164 bb)
BU: $12.71 (127 bb)
SB: $16.32 (163 bb)
BB (Hero): $11.25 (113 bb)

Pre-Flop: ($0.15) Hero is BB with A♦ A♣
2 players fold, CO raises to $0.35, 2 players fold, Hero 3-bets to $1.10, CO 4-bets to $3.35, Hero 5-bets to $11.25 (all-in), CO calls $7.90

Flop: ($22.55) 3♦ K♦ T♦ (2 players, 1 all-in)

Turn: ($22.55) J♦ (2 players, 1 all-in)

River: ($22.55) J♣ (2 players, 1 all-in)

Total pot: $22.55 (Rake: $1.12)

Showdown:
BB (Hero) shows A♦ A♣ (a flush, Ace high)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 88%, Flop: 93%, Turn: 100%, River: 100%)

CO shows A♠ K♠ (two pair, Kings and Jacks)
(Equity - Pre-Flop: 12%, Flop: 7%, Turn: 0%, River: 0%)

BB (Hero) wins $21.43

You may want to dig deeper. I posted in BBV once about paying a fish tax of 9 buy ins and I had some sick beats that session. Kind of like you had in that list of hands. I ran pretty far under EV.

The last couple weeks I haven’t been playing I just been studying and reviewing hands from my data base.

I went through a losing session in my graph Sunday and I’m pretty sure it was from that bad session I had. It was Blitz and I played almost 1800 hands 2 tabling that session. I wanted to get to the other side of the run bad and finally gave up.

When I went through it, it looked like as I was losing hands my decisions got worse probably out of frustration. I was calling down lighter and getting aggressive in spots I typically wouldn’t. It probably should have only been a 5 maybe 6 buy in losing session. I was donking chips off in spots I’d normally wouldn’t.

Not saying that happened to you but it definitely did to me. If you would have asked me at that time I would have told you I played well and it was a lot of bad luck. So I’d suggest going through your sessions throughly and be honest with yourself about your play. If it was solid and it was bad luck then it is what it is but if you notice spots you are losing 20bbs here, 10 bbs there that you typically wouldn’t then you may have a mental game leak in addition to your run bad. Those bad calls and over aggressive plays tilting add up.

I made an investment in to my mental game. There’s plenty of material out there for it.

Moving down to 10nl was smart as well.

I’d also go through your data base and try to find some population tendencies. The player pool on ACR is good for the most part. Probably because it’s bot infested for one and I don’t think it’s a cardroom for fun rec players like Stars or any of the American regulated sites. Even so I found stuff to exploit in my population reviews. I started 4bet bluffing more vs LP and SB 3bets and check raise/barreling cbets more with equity. The pool plays pretty aggressive.

Also I don’t know what HUD you use but DriveHUD works on Blitz. Once I got that it was a game changer. My winrate went up significantly. Knowing who’s a nit or maniac or LAG, etc really helped.

yeah those spots definitely show where I make a 10-25bb mistake. its not always when im losing either but I see your point. I uploaded my entire DB to snowie (before I moved down to 10NL) and snowie said I left some absurb number like 2K on the table in EV. even though my preflop numbers were spot on, my postflop range construction and understanding of how to apply monker ranges postflop were not. ive been working on those spots away from the table, also calling a 3B IP had a bigger loss rate than calling OOP. that's another spot I have to dig into. I was opening 2.5bb and my winrate calling 3b is like -201bb/100. so although im doing better than folding, IP is -260 and OOP like -150bb/100. I still have a sub to elite rio for another week or so and that's what ive been focusing on. it has improved drastically over the last couple weeks and I believe im on the right track.

as far as HUD I don't use one, DriveHUD doesn't work for me for some reason. I get all 0s and although the names update, theyre all in the wrong spot and never go above 0. even for hero. they asked me to send a log file but I haven't got around to it yet so I have to go off memory or the notes I take on ACR. I do color-code villains and take notes on hands though. i also take hand written notes when i do session reviews on stats and possible exploits ( like a villain is that cbets 75% flop and 35% turn) then when i play again i keep those notes in front of me on my desk so i can take notes on ACR and color code villains.

Here is day 2 session. off to a fantastic start! had a few spots that were questionable, but overall i don't think i played horrible. some sick runouts though lol seems to be my life nowadays.

let me know what you think, if you have a hand you think is worthy of discussion just mark down the time so i know where to look for it

Day 2 Session