this week i have played long sessions.
i sleap about 6 hours for last 2 days so next some days Nioh > Poker .
will try to have a rest and pass a way of the Samurai.

expectation :
reality :

10 hours of gambling

again in important tourneys for me game shows me who im.
begin to seems that i some how could leave some spots.
have tilted after that.

now i understand:

if you floped two pairs or set or toppair with nuts flush draw its is insta fold. even if we are playing firsts. yes they will offer you to check before fold but this that where is a dirty trick. remember floped two pairs or set or top pair with nust flush draw INSTA FOLD.

last week was good i havent played so much but have analized my game a lot. and now i see where i can improve my game and how. it is very good. a lot of work is necessary.

as for grafh it is good that i have won some tickets but without good payouts. anyway they will come soon.

dont bluff me im callingstation

No Limit Holdem Tournament
8 Players
Hand Conversion Powered by WeakTight Poker Hand History Converter
Stacks:
UTG (14,890) 15bb
UTG+1 (50,190) 50bb
MP1 (24,800) 25bb
MP2 (27,190) 27bb
CO (33,750) 34bb
BTN (22,890) 23bb
SB Hero (22,390) 22bb
BB (54,140) 54bbBlinds: 500/1,000 Ante 100
Pre-Flop: (2,801, 8 players) Hero is SB 7 Q

6 folds, Hero calls 500, BB checks

Flop: A 5 K (3,301, 2 players)
Hero checks, BB bets 1,120, Hero calls 1,120
Turn: K (5,541, 2)
Hero checks, BB bets 3,000, Hero calls 3,000
River: 9 (11,541, 2)
Hero checks, BB bets 7,000, Hero calls 7,000
Final Pot: 25,541
BB shows
4 2
Hero shows
7 Q
Hero wins 25,040 (net +12,820)
BB lost 12,220

rather a lot bubbles last days. some of them was pain but its ok. the most important thing that i think i`m playing a bit more than i have to play. need more rest and sleep.

just want to get some result but i`m realy tired and must to slow down a bit. next days will more work on my game and try to get rest.

when i wins i love poker when i loses poker loves me

ye this weak poker loves me sometimes hard. today my aces won only when all folded. and to lose 88 < 62 on bubble 4 players to prizes must be funny but nope.

tilted.

im so tired that i feels like im drunked.

this day was much more better than last weak i have deep runs im wining a lot 80\20 but loses all coins. important or no. i think today i havent won any coin with pair. hope next days will be better. but in a hole it was very good day.

no mood was to post here because it became scary to play already and i dont know is there somebody reading. its frustrates me. i really feels scary when i catch some good hand or board.

today was the day with big plans but they are not worked. some 33s and two 55. in one 55 when i catch good A8s after a lot rounds to push and yes he had hand JJ. and in second when i have even TT and nobody had hand he just did this :

No Limit Holdem Tournament
PartyPoker8 Players
Hand Conversion Powered by WeakTight Poker Hand History Converter
Stacks:
UTG (96k) 27bb
UTG+1 (51k) 14bb
MP1 Hero (43k) 12bb
MP2 (116k) 33bb
CO (179k) 51bb
BTN (54k) 15bb
SB (177k) 51bb
BB (207k) 59bbBlinds: 1.8k/3.5k Ante 435
Pre-Flop: (8.7k, 8 players) Hero is MP1 10 10

2 folds, Hero goes all-in 42k, 3 folds, SB calls 40k, 1 fold

Flop: 7 3 5 (91k, 2 players), 1 all-in
Turn: 6 (91k, 2), 1 all-in

River: 8 (91k, 2), 1 all-in
Final Pot: 91k
SB shows
9 8
Hero shows
10 10
SB wins 91k (net +49k)
Hero lost 43k

...

im so wanted to finish this year with some result but we have that we have.

sharkscope looks something like this. i feel like he puts my tickets wins like +$ wins :





and holdem manager dont tracking winings tickets as $ winings just only as - when i uses it and the grafh looks a bit more depressed but i think its transfer better the picture :



so i have played like for ~ +2500 EV$ and it is good for this time but couldnt realize it in $. and its frustrated. also i know where and how to improve my game and its good i just need to do it.

the bad thing except the hole situation that i have lost ~100 in cash in tilt after 2-3 insane sessions in mtts. i have looked this session and like ~80% my moves for stack were total 80\20 but they ****ed me. but it does not acquit me and i and i cannot afford such things. it was BIG mistake.

anyway i have some cash for next sessions and hope i will get mood soon too to crush all.

so guys with coming new year. be happy with yourself. be happy.

after holidays im broke my gamepad and its hurts my heart. will repair it later.
and i thought that the problem in my pc and im crushed my windows while i was repairing the gamepad .. omg.

somehow i managed to be returned to work windows but i lost all my base. mb its good because the EV grafh depressed me. so i will use sharkscope now.

out 90/3446 in 33 bounty. didnt get many bounties but anyway got cash for next week and its good.



the stragedy the same - playing for 33+ tickets and crush them all.

worst week i have played on this run. i didnt get any ticket. it was unbelievable. and i have played more than ussual because when i have got some hand it was like ok you have KK so look at AA you have AJ so look on AQ hmm AK ? ok hello KK with K on flop or mb you have fullhouse ok look at this one and etc.

at the start of week br was like 150 and after this all like 49. then i have played cash and now it is 90. there are thoughts of change of discipline. because if i playing all sats it is incredible br managment. and if im playing only 0.5-1 satts it is so small amount of them. i must play all day to take even 4 table at the same time because they are starts like every 30+ or hour. or to grind with crazy brm.

hope it is will end soon. im tilted . feelings when in life is not everything ok and on tables the same.. feels like the world against you.