Been following your threads for a while, glad to see you're hopefully on the right track. Would be great to meet you sometime in the Vic and say hi! Everything you can do to keep in the best shape possible will pay dividends at the felt, all the best going forward!

Love this thread. Happy to hear you are doing something pro-active about your health, I am sure a lot of people reading are going through similar problems.

Have played holdem professionally for a good number of years but have played close to zero PLO (or any other format) before. I would like to learn how to play live PLO cashgame but don't even know the basics. Is playing some low stakes online the best way to learn or would you recommend something else?

More updates please!

Only just found this new thread. Wish you all the best mate, keep us posted

subbed, gl boss

Update Time

So I've been pretty lazy in regards to updating this thing in March. Well, in fact, it's less lazy and more of me not wanting to be thinking about poker too much outside of actually playing. With live poker the playing time is so long and then on top of that sometimes there is a long waiting time etc and it's all just...well it's a lot. In my downtime I've been trying to keep poker free for the majority of it. Hopefully that absence from poker once i'm off the table will aid having a better balance and a healthier mind.

Online Poker

I won't post an updated online graph as well, there isn't anything to update. I lost $5k at 2/5z this month and $2k at 1/2z this month and haven't played since the first few days of the month. I've actually self banned my stars for a while as I want to be able to be pushed towards other hobbies and activities when I'm sat bored at home as opposed to firing up 1/2zoom or whatever.

Live Poker

Boom goes the dynamite. Live poker was pretty handsome to me this month. I think I probably played my A game about 90% of the time and played my Z game for 10 minutes of one session. I gotta be happy with that.



I was able to put in a pretty swing free March and games were good, allowed for a decent month profit/result wise. Hoping for more of the same in April.

I posted a hand in HSPLO (I also posted it here) and originally was saddened at the responses. 2p2 really has become a pretty harsh place, good posters from the past like J.A.O.P have just become condescending *******s and stuff. Thinking they're better than people because they understand this spot or that spot better than the OP. It's a sad way to be really and it's a shame for him in my opinion. For me posting that hand was a success, I thought there was no way we should be folding at any point. It turns out I was wrong and happily wrong as now my game improves as a result.

Anxiety

So it appears I'm still riddled with some sort of anxiety or another. I had several panic attacks last month when walking to work. It's not so nice but I'm working through it and believe I feel better now than when I originally started the thread.

I'll write a bigger post on this after Monday. I've started seeing a therapist and want to give a recap of what it's like trying to deal with this stuff and fighting it.

Hope all are well, glgl for April.

good to see you making steps and doing ok in the meantime. GL

Rooting for you mate, what a great month considering where you were in December 2015. Go go go buddy! Hope the anxiety issue gets better mate

Wow subbed, can relate to your lifestyle somewhat who has played plo high ( not crazy high) and also suffer anxiety, will keep a look on this very much I wish you all the best

great read, congrats on the nice month.

Niceeeeee!! On the comeback trail

glglgl

Got long rant prepared re: UKIPT.

Sufficed to say they managed to steam me before I'd even taken my seat.

Are you playing today? I've already halved my stack in 3 levels :s

Looolll yep, me too. Despite having GOAT table and having the deck hit me in the face for the first hour or so.

haha oh dear. I'm at table 11 btw if you wanna come say hi (if I'm even in for another level!)

Poker, Rants and Bants

I guess I'll start with my main issue of the day, which was registering to play the UKIPT. So I decided to walk from my home in Vauxhall to Leicester Square. I planned on regging kinda an hour or 2 hours late and used the morning to take in some fresh air and stretch the legs a little. I arrive at the Hippo, a casino where I've played some cash before, albeit very little. I head to their downstairs cash desk and prepare to buy in. As I approach they ask me if I have a membership card, I tell them that I do not but that I am a member and I have played cash games there before. They look me up on the system and low and behold I'm there. The man serving me was fairly arsey throughout our interaction and he gave me a funny look and tells me that I'm 'registered in the system as an unemployed poker player'.

I tell him that's me, that's my life. He then tells me that unless I can show him a hendon mob showing some tournament results that I won't be allowed to register for the tournament today as they'll have no proof as to where the cash comes from. I tell him that although I've played some big tournaments, like the main event at the wsop, $5k PLO's in vegas, $10k PLO's in Vegas, tournaments in Macau and Australia etc that I hadn't had any cashes (what, the cash game guy who punts the very occasional tournament has zero cashes). So not only am I now being put through a process that should take 1 minute for over 20 minutes but I'm being given the rub down of being reminded that my tournament career has yielded some harsh losses.

Anyway he tells me that I'll have to prove it some other way. 'Are there any articles about you?', he asks. I tell him, Yes! There is. I locate the nutblocker article and show him, it has my picture etc but again he says this doesn't prove anything. Why would there me a random poker article on a clear poker site about me if I wasn't a f'ing poker player?!?! He calls for the manager. The manager comes down and says I can't enter, my money isn't verified and could be dirty. He asks me if I play at any other casinos. I tell him yes, I play weekly at the Vic and he asks to see my deposit slip. I show him that and I guess the figure was big enough that they decided it was time to stop treating me like a POS and they let me enter. Roughly 30 minutes after I'd turned up to the desk with my debit card ready to go to tournament war.

The actual tournament itself was short and sweet whilst it latest. I guess that whole ordeal had left me pre steamed and I was maybe projecting a little of that in my early play. My table was excellent, super soft. One bloke kept straddling, that's right, STRADDLING in a tournament. I played one awesomely terrible but funny hand where I floated the fish with Q9o on a J65 board. Turn came a 7 and he bet like 2.5k and I jammed for 10k and to my dismay he snap calls. I tell him i'm gonna need to get lucky and reveal my Q high but alas, I was ahead. He had snap me off and he had T8o. River can a J and I secured a double up. Shortly after the same bloke straddles to 1k with blinds at 150/300, I make it 2.6k with QJo and folds to his straddle and he jams blind. I watched him the whole way and it was definitely a blind shove. I call off and he wakes up with 10 10. I lose the flip and my fun afternoon at the Hippodrome was over.

The whole registration thing left a very bitter taste in my mouth and it's very bad for the future of poker. Before my debacle I'd already waited in the queue for 15 minutes whilst they had a big argument with another customer who wanted to buy his friend in, apparently that is vehemently against the rules now. Stuff like this will lead to severely reduced fields and will serve only to piss off a lot of fun players. Furthermore it creates a system where cash players basically can't buy in to tournaments! Like professional players who play cash game poker for a living won't be able to come and enjoy the occasional tournament. Unreal.

After my fun and games in the early afternoon at the Hippo I returned to the Vic for my normal grind. I had took yesterday off because it was my birthday and was eager to put in some hours. I ran pretty cold and I ended up losing £10k in the 10/25. That puts my month at +£14k so far, so not all bad but was the worst losing day I'd had for a while .

Shame I didn't get to meet at other 2p2'ers at the UKIPT main, I got shafted off in some little back room and don't think there were any of the main bloggers in there. To whoever is left in, benA, GazzyB, Blaakman etc gl and i'll update again soon.

...

Hippo customer service always left a bit to be desired. Definitely could work on being a bit friendlier and ensuring players had a good time. Don't particularly get the feeling it's high on their list of priorities.

Jesus, what an awful experience. Funky play in those hands! Sounds way more fun than my day

Update

So I wasn't entirely happy with my last update. Bit of an old man grumpy rant and not enough good content. I do still have a standing beef with the customer service and approach of the Hippodrome staff but meh, what to do, I'll play there very little lifetime so it's not worth whining about.

Tell us about some f'ing poker your degenerate

So as many know, and i'm sure as some don't know, I've been doing pretty well in 2016. I'm back in the 'big' games, in London (backed) and been crushing pretty hard. A hell of a lot of run good but I think i've done a good job of playing my A game a lot and also implemented some soft skill stuff that i've neglected too often in the past. I've had some of the better regs message me and say they've noticed changes in my game in regards to my ranges and how i'm adapting to the ranges of others so it's nice to get some recognition that my lab work has been paying off. Since October last year i'd be confident that no reg has worked more off the table than myself.

I don't want to say too much in depth about the games here in London as a) we have a high amounts of regs as it is already and b) if I was to say anything i'll probably get shot or shanked by a reg in the parking lot . I told Leo (isildroon) that the games here were good action during a £10/25 at Aspers and no one has let me live it down since.

I've been working on my 'game management'. Online pro's will lol @ this but I think live poker is a different beast that requires a different approach. I think when you're unsure what stake games will have a longevity etc you have to change your approach to negotiate the amount of variance. I used to not to this and would just play every spot in a manner I felt was correct. Nowadays if i'm up £5-10k and I think a game doesn't have the legs or that we'll be facing 3 weeks of just £2/5 etc I take my foot of the gas. This could be ridiculed but I'll stand by my convictions for now until someone argues me down .

My April stands at about +£14.5k at the moment. I started pretty ferociously but took a few road bumps along the way last week. I was kinda upset with my play in the UKIPT. I mean playing a £700 tournament vs say my £10/25 hourly isn't gonna be that wise, equally having some balance in poker and also getting tournament scores (or at least attempting to) is probably the future of poker, so I didn't mind. I was a litttttllleeee bit aggro tho.

Was a shame not to meet some 2p2'ers who have messaged me in here and also sent me some nice PM's, BenA etc in particular. Next time I'll make a more concerted effort to make that happen, unfortunately on Thurs I got the text that an excellent £10/25 had started and couldn't say no.

Bore us about your physical and mental health ya old git

I turned 29 last week. I guess in poker terms this makes me an absolute dinosaur. In life terms I'm still relatively young.

I've been working out more frequently, usually with free weights but also went for my first run in forever on friday. I do believe that since the start of the year my life has been as balanced as it ever has in the past few years. I still seem to be in the grips of anxiety issues, still take pills, still feel uneasy a lot etc. However, compared to when I started this thread it's a lot better. During that period I wouldnt leave the house to visit people, I wouldn't take the tube. I'd end poker sessions with head aches. I was shaking and trembling with fear nearly every night. The me now compared to the me then is making good strides.

I've been seeing a therapist in London lately. As I work on my physical approach to battling whatever is troubling me I thought it would be good to try and open up the mind and see if that approach reaped any benefits. Therapy is kinda cool I guess (this isn't really how you should view it but this thread is a trust/honesty tree). You just sit and speak to some nice chap about this, that and whatever. It can get a little intense and deep sometimes but on the whole it feels worthwhile. I'm not sure what I'm truly getting out of it though and I could be wasting my money. I pay £80 per session, is this a lot/standard?

Outside of that I've just continued onwards and upwards with 8 minute meditation and I belief it is a great tool for a poker player. My relaxation and clarity is definitely a lot better as a result. I'm going to take up Yoga and will do so by attempting group classes as I think this kinda kills 2 birds with one stone with me.

Anyway that's a bunch of waffle. I have a few stag do's coming up and I think they'll effect the amount of poker I play so next update will likely be a monthly one.

Happy grinding punters.

Great update, thanks! Awesome to see you doing better health and poker wise. GL!

This is the only bit that i'm qualified to comment on so i will! I'm interested as to what modality your therapist uses - is it 'in the moment' stuff, strategies & homework to deal with certain things (anxiety), or looking into the past and seeing how they effect you in the present? The reason i ask is because prices can vary a lot depending on their mode of work. Depending on location, experience and whether it's a practice and not a sole trader makes the prices vary greatly. I'd say the average therapist in london is £60 but if you go into the city for cognitive therapy or long term psychotherapy you can be looking at £200 an hour

This bit is funny cus i think therapy can be very cool! It's a huge deal to go talk to a stranger about some pretty raw stuff and i personally think it's awesome to explore your self and understand your behavioural patterns in a safe, non pressured way. Also for me, after ~75 hours of therapy as part of my training, i talk about a lot of light enjoyable stuff. The best thing about it is that you have someone there who won't pass judgement and is there in your own space for your own well-being. Pretty cool if you ask me

There's this kinda assumption that going to therapy is a quick fix to ones problems, when in reality we're extremely complicated and it's impossible to have a 'one size fits all'. I just wrote a long addition to this but it sounded preachy so i deleted it. Basically just saying that it's not easy to look at yourself with a magnifying glass and to not necessarily expect these life changing ah-ha moments. There will likely be moments of clarity, though, which can be amazing.

This should be standard, and is something a lot of people don't get. Short term irrationality is justified if it prevents longer term more costly irrationality. In the example given above, if losing the 10k means having to move down and play lower stakes, or you know it will lead to monstrous tilt/spew over the proceeding days, then it's worth playing a little nittier and reducing the risk of incurring those long term costs.

The way the hippodrome treats their customers these days is pretty pitiful. Im sorry to hear what happened to you its ridiculous. I would have probably snap tilted and walked out of that place . The staff at the vic is 100x better imo and thats why I put most of my volumes these days. Good to see you doing so well after a tough start to the thread, all the best.

Ben! Thanks for this reply pal. I don't check my thread that regularly and it gets quickly buried amongst the hundreds of PG&C's pretty fast so I end up missing out on thanking people for great replies. I agree with the therapy being a long term process. You can tell at the end of sessions that you feel like a little piece of the puzzle has been broken off, however you then wait a week or so for the next session and it can feel like no progress has been made. My therapist uses the mode of digging into the past and then reviewing how that has shaped my tendencies. It's kind of slow work but he is very easy to talk to and seems very smart.

Poker/Life update

Lately I've hit a little bit of a mini downswing. The games are playing out big at the Vic lately and the swings have been large as a result. I walked away from last week feeling pretty happy with my play and without worry though. I lost a bunch of huge all ins, some standard, some completely ridiculous. I think I played 5 all ins between £9-20k last week and got scooped in all of them whilst running it twice. One thing I felt I could have done a little better last week was stop loss and makes earlier quits. Games were pretty reg heavy and it was a bunch of the better regs. I think in those line ups my edge is kinda minimal, albeit I think I do have an ok edge. No one is giving away money in those line ups so perhaps it's best to reduce the stop loss amount for these games. I heard over the back end of the week and on the weekend there was an influx again of fun players. Hopefully that'll continue this week also

I only played a short week last week and lost like £25k, was a bad week but I'm still up a small amount for April, so no complaints. I only played Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. I returned to Manchester to have dinner with my brother on the Thursday night and then I went up to Edinburgh for the weekend or my best friends stag where I was the best man. It was a cracking weekend and was great to see some old faces.

Since the anxiety issues I haven't really drank much this year. Obviously on a stag weekend that wasn't really an option and I'm currently in the midst of a two day hangover. With that in mind the plan is to ease back into the week. I have picked up some good tactics off other peoples PG&C's and I've been listing out some weekly objectives. Some mental game related, some poker related. Currently I'd rather keep them personal but if I think they're making a big difference I'll start including them in the thread.

Ok that'll do for now, gl all and happy grinding.

BigAisOK?

Over the past few weeks the streets looked like the back end of a bad battery farm chicken house. Feathers and blood were sloshed across the floor. What had started as a fruitful April had started to disintegrate. Fresh apples and oranges had been left maggot ridden. Weekday shops at Waitrose were turning into evening jaunts at a Tesco express.

Now it has to be said, this was all a little hyperbolic. My month wasn't in the gutter. I was down over a mere 300bb's. Nothing to freak out and lose hair over. I had however felt the pain end of the swing stick.

This past 7-9 sessions however, we have steadied the ship. The game has had a particular fun player. Fun player = player who makes the game fun. On top of that I've been running very well versus this fun player, very well indeed.

So all is pretty good. April is back in the black and game have been rosy. However, I sit in my chair and analyse and I can't be entirely happy. For instance, the session on Friday night. I would say it was my worst session potentially of the month but I was fortunate to stroll away with a +£9k night, such is life. I didn't play awfully but it wasn't a clean operation. I was being isolated, in too many 3bet pots where I was out of position etc. I think it was a little burnout. The deck co-operated with me, that was nice. However, to remain at the top I have to make these sessions few and far between.

I would like to jazz the blog up. I think the recaps are fine for my own diary purposes but less entertaining as a read. I always liked PG&C's with hand histories. These in their own right are usually interesting and often promote discussion that is left missing all too much on the modern day 2p2. I guess it's much tougher to keep a tab on live hand histories (no HUDs and trackers there :O ) but i'll do my best in future. If I don't write down one interesting hand per post i'll fire off some freeroll's. The other issue being that many London regs know of this blog, some of whom I share the felt with quite regularly. Information, as many know, is power.

Poker is well, Health is well.

Outside of poker I stumbled across one of the all time tilting things. Booking a holiday. I plan to go away in the first week of May to Greece with my girlfiend. A well earned treat and break as I've put in many hours since March. It's a nightmare booking a holiday though. Too many options, too many hurdles. However, my therapists says these are the 'normal activities I should get a grip of'. He thinks my inner child overrides my inner adult.

With that said it's freeroll time (sadly done on an honour system, fear not though..I'm an honest man). If I don't get this holiday booked up tonight I will put the first replier to this post in a SCOOP event up to $215.

I'm currently swinging through a revolving door of life normality. I drank a fruit juice this morning, I've ran this afternoon and I haven't fired Sunday's. This is quite nice this normality, in fact, it's not really scary at all.