I'm 25 this year and have been playing poker since 2014 after I met a very good friend of mine through a goverent programme after I blabbered some nonsense about 888 poker because I saw it's advertisements on anime streaming websites.

Due to various situations in life such as anxiety disorder, heart problems, financial problems etc, I have stopped playing poker since 2016, and since, have been struggling to build a decent bankroll to play live poker with.

Now I have managed to gather 1k for playing live 1/2 games.

Yesterday was Day One.

Here's how it went.

BANKROLL : 1000$
Hours : 3 hours, 4pm to 7pm
Up : 360$
Game : 1/2
Buy in : 200$

Lady luck is shining on me. I believe everyone on the table can somehow tell that I am very tight and pretty aggressive when I'm in pots.

I held QQp about 4 times, JJp about once to twice, AQs, AJo.

My game plan was to keep my decisions simple because I am dipping my toes, and so, a short session will enable me to get a feel of the games there, and if I'm up, I get to lock in a win to boost my confidence.

There was one particular guy who sat on my left, two seats away from me, let's call him 2SA.

He is quite a whale, as far as I feel during the first hour, because he is in many many pots and has shown down some garbage. But I can't be sure since it's my first time there, and i have never played with him before.

He got into a couple of pots with me in the first hour, and then this hand happened.

I had QQp in EP.

I OR to 15$

2SA called.

LP called.

Pot : 48$~

FLOP : 567(flush draw)

I cbetted about 35$

2SA called(as usual) and LP folded.

Pot : 118$~

Turn : 9c

I decided to cbet again, this time for about 60+ -

Many a times my brain goes autopilot after a couple of hours playing poker and suddenly I have a spot which I need to do some thinking and my brain started to jam because I can't find the correct thought process to use.
So, I told the table to give me some time, i squinted my eyes so hard, then my brain said, V could be holding a ton of ****ty combos here because in other hands, he was calling down others with garbage of the garbage, just because it was suited.

But that isn't a very good reason actually if I were to think logically.

It's because, although QQp is a super strong hand, but because of how the FLOP and TURN turns out, V has a higher chance of holding a hand that has me beat.
And so, i could not have extracted three streets of value like how I wished to. But instead, my hand is on the lower end of the value spectrum because a ton of other hands has me beat here while my hand value has declined.

I thought about this because of my friend who accompanied me to my first session yesterday and that's what he analysed, and that he also mentioned that I should have checked it back to see what V would have done instead of going full throttle.

Like how i did with my other QQp, because in those other situations, like a hand, I had QQp, V on my left accidentally faced up his hole cards, and the the flop was dealt, and he made trips, just that, he had already folded his hand, and so, I knew that my QQp was very probably best here. And so, pumping huge loads of chips into the centre was the smart decision to make, because my QQp here, is on the higher spectrum in terms of value hands.

----------

Thanks bro for accompanying me to the game, and for your encouragement and help throughout the years

Just for recording purposes.

When I was up against 2SA in previous hands, I barrelled FLOP and TURN for value, and OTT he usually tanks for a while and fold.

Also, the FLOP flush draw is of spades and the other card is of a club.
When the TURN C fell, there are two flush draws on the board OTT.

[Day Three]

BANKROLL : 1360$(actual : 1220$)
Hours : 3.5hours, 2:30pm to 6pm
Up : 40$
Game : 1/2
Buy in : 200$

There's a couple of very loose players in the game today and one of them i call slit, because his eyes is like a slit when he smiles. He's one of my main target today in the game because he open raised way too much, and cbets way too much on all kinds of board but shuts down when he gets raised or when his cbets get called and they he folds..

Today's game was good, just that i have no part in it even though I was dealt at least 3 AK, 1 JJp, 1 to 2 AJ and two small set miners and 1KKp.

With those AK, I either miss the flop completely and decide not to cbet, or, i got raised to 40 by Mr. Boa(for those who watch one piece) when I opened to 15 in EP, and decided to play a low variance game because that's what I wanted to do with this challenge.

I realised that I have a old problem that i have yet to solve.

Extracting value.

When I have many good hands coming non stop, it feels like a breeze betting and betting snd jamming it in on the RIVER nonchalantly for value. But when I'm card dead, and everyone on the table knows that I am nitty af, extracting value against those regs who know my play style becomes more difficult.

Hero JJp, 140+

One hand, I had JJp. I raised in EP, and Mr estate called 10 OTB.

FLOP : 759

I cbet 15, estate calls

TURN Qx

I checked oop, estate bets 40. He's aggressive, and i have played with many times before last time.

I called with my JJp.

River : Jx

I checked to induce a bet from V. Terrible mistake...i only have 60+ left. And pot was 130 now. If I betted, he would have called with a range of hands which I crush. But he didn't bet, he check and mucked, and i scooped up the pot... I probably should have cbetted bigger, to 20 maybe so that it will be easier for V to call my bets in later streets..

Another hand was when I held AK with 200$ stack

I opened to 15 in EP

4 callers including estate

POT 60

FLOP : Q9X

CHECK THROUGH

TURN : Jx

Check through

River : Kx

I first to act betted 30 into 60.

Well, there's four players including me, so, I thought if i betted 30, someone with a Q or even J might call. But I was playing too nitty because I was card dead and I don't cbet much. And everyone folded when the river K fell because it hits my range so hard. I thought that if I were to bet smaller, like, 25$ green chip, or even 20$, I might hsve gotten some value out of them instead having them fold.

But well..

Tomorrow will be a better day...

At one point, i was down to 140 and managed to climb back up to 200 and then was down again to about 170 and climbed back up again and cashed out at 240.

[Day Six]

BANKROLL : 1400$(actual : 1220$)***
Hours : 3hours, 3:30pm to 6:35pm
Up : breakeven
Game : 1/2
Buy in : 200$

***I climbed up to 1400$ in the last update but I forgot to change the numbers.

Today's a slow day.

The game isn't good today. There's no big spewers and everyone have some knowledge of what they are doing, and I didn't get much playable hands and when I have them, i miss. When I do hit, they fold :'(

I tried to open up more. Twice, i think, with suited connectors, but I feel it's more of like burning money away because I am not aggressive enough postflop, I don't open with such hands enough times to show a significant difference in my game, and it didn't connect with the board in anyway, so, I ended up giving up the pot.

I would like to open up more with such hands because the games I frequent have lots of regulars who picked up my play style and they actively exploit it but due to my small bankroll size, I'm afraid of losing it.

There's definitely ways to outplay them though. Bluffing more often against thinking players in the correct spots is one.

I have alot of things to work on. Maybe, all those possibilities are at the other side of scared money poker..

But its ok cos it's only the third session and the hours i put in is very short as compared to the amount of hours I used to play i the past. I'll adjust myself to those thinking players by finding spots to bluff them.

There's this particular hand which I played against a thinking player(E).

It was 7handed I think.

Folded to us in the SB. I or to 10

V on my direct left called after thinking.

Flop : QhJh2d

I cbetted to 10 with QJ

He reluctantly folded.

I knew it made V curious because I didn't bet big for value. Instead, i betted 10 to induce a call from V because i blocked QX,JX, if he had TT-77, he might fold if i betted big just because it is me.

This also shows that he is able to lay hands down. If i block some combos that connect with the flop, i will consider bluffing V with it.

There's a hand which I kind of regretted making the move too hastily.

I held TTp and haven't been getting calls from my made hands plus I was down and the game was dispersing soon.

Late MP, Mr. AK limped

Hero OTB opened to 15

L.MP calls

Pot : 33~

Flop : 772

Hero recognised this star moon sun earth alignment which only occurs once in every 800 years.. and cbetted 20 after being checked to

V thought for awhile and reached for 60 and threw it out.

Hero's heart almost jumped out through the mouth because he recognise this flop and he made a mistake.

With bout 80 left, he announced his shove.

V folded.

Hero should have flatted and let V bluff again OTT because nothing much will change OTT / OTR.. Could have induced V to bluff again but...

Tomorrow will be a better day ��

[Day Seven] 27/11/2018

BANKROLL : 1390$
(actual : 1210$)***
Hours : 3.5hours
4:15~pm to 7:29~pm
Up : -10$
Game : 1/2
Buy in : 200$

Have not been sleeping well. Sleeps late, like 1pm/2pm+ almost everyday. Wakes up in the middle of the night. Then automatically wakes up again at 6+ in the morning, then again at 7+ 8+ 9+ almost everyday this is the routine. Lol

I have been playing very tight at the tables because I'm adjusting my thought process and to get back into the game again. I have no calling range, almost, might call a straddle for 5$ if i have a small pocket pair to setmine for cheap. Lol.

The line up that comes to the table are better than the regular fishes. They know how to bluff with missed FD OTR which blocks some straight combos, and then this other guy(brute) in the hand with him tanks and called with AQo on a K high river. FLOP and TURN have nothing higher than a 9h(hesrts flush draw OTF). Which I think is a good call due to the board runout. Though I forgot the board cards, but I can remember how I felt at then because of keywords and mental imagery which i "tagged" those feelings and thought processes etc to. Lol

I will be coming up with a "schedule", so that I will put in a minimum set of hours, every week or every month, instead "feeling guilty" when i don't play.

Today morning at 12+midnight, I was studying and I thought of how I took poker seriously and how much i have grown in this game. From someone who gets lost postflop in live games because of the pressure and anxiousness when I finally get into a pot with someone and have to fight tooth and nail with that person to win the pot, to having to mentally calculate the chips but fail, and have to ask the dealer on every street how much the pot is, taking note of a gazillion other issues while I'm starting at the board, figuring out what V's range is and coming up with nothing because I autopilotted automatically after a period of time and then making moves which are mistakes because I have no clue about many things. Ending up with the house of cards scattered all over on the ground due to my lack of proper structured thought processes
To today, I can mentally do the gymnastics at the snap of my fingers, ask for more time and really try to find a solution while asking for time, to holding my nerves even though my heart is beating so hard(i literally resisted looking downwards to see if my shirt was bopping or not) because I got called and have to go postflop with my AK-AT/JJp-77p.. hands which i don't like lol because I haven't been playing for a really long time, and am trying to figure out how to play them again.

On the second/third/fourth session, I have figured out how two regulars played and i manage to take advantage of their leaks(and more other "regulars/thinking players" in the third and fourth session)
I'm pretty happy about it because I have no clue if what i did worked or not in previous years of playing live poker, and there's no way to save hand histories so that i can review them later automatically.
I have to jot it down, and I do forget details alot, very quickly, and what's more? I many a times have no clue if what I'm studying is correct or not and if I'm making any actual progress, so.. these improvements is something I'm pretty happy about

I believe there's still more to them and im going to dig further. In fact, I have made some plans in my journal on how i can improve my game which I believe i will realise it's potential as I continue to play more often.

[Day Fourteen]

Can't believe it has been a week since I last played.
I have been studying alot, in fact, way too much which caused me to have analysis paralysis(as my friend said to me).

One of the reasons I didn't play the entire week is because I wanted to loosen up my play, widen my range, find and understand spots which I can get aggressive with.

My play during the 4 sessions has been about not losing money, due to my small bankroll. And there hasn't been any fishes that came by that i could scoop up with my flimsy net after the first session. I decided to just "take a day off to study" and it snowballed to a week of inaction.

I did try to book my seats twice though on the SAT and today, but due to various reasons the seats are unavailable. So, even though I thought that I have the mindset and energy to play, I didn't msnage to play in the end.

The reason why I decided to journal even though i didn't play was because of some drastic changes I made to my strategy after meeting up with my poker friend who gave me poker coaching. We met up yesterday, two weeks after the first come back session which he attended with me on 21th Nov 2018.

Previously i mentioned that i don't have any calling range, infact I just fold AJo OTB when CO opens lol. When I told my friend what i did, his jaw almost touched the ground!
That was all because of myself playing scared money. Now that I think from another angle, I really do not need much to get started in poker. All i need is just one buyin. And i can get one buyin easily. It's ok if i go busto. It's ok really. As long as I try to play my best game Everytime I sit down at the table, one day, the poker god will see my hardwork and dedication and let me run it up to a small bankroll which i can take shots with, riding the good variance granted by the gods.

I feel anxious af whenever I need to step out of the house although I try to hold my nerves, but if I don't play, i have to go to work. Poker is definitely better than work, anytime. I can be in my comfortable clothes, I can even wear pajamas to "Office" if i want to!

After yesterday's discussion with my friend and having him set my mindset in the correct direction, and removing all the unnecessary work I'm putting into that's holding me back, I'm ready to go get them. Thinking about it, poker isn't that tough after all. Like everything in life, it's about getting used to it, and recognising patterns that emerge over and over again. Whenever i discuss about situations i face in poker with my friend, he goes into details about spots and board textures, player types etc, as well as what I need to focus on what strategies to use and how to use them correctly. Poker is easy yet complicated and that's why it's always good to have a poker coach to guide you and lead you through, and I'm very thankful to meet him

I mentioned that i will be setting some schedule but since the casino's card room schedule is not fixed and I have to book my seats on the day itself and it's difficult to tell if they will have enough players to begin with, I will be aiming for 20 hours a week at least. I'll try my best to play two days of long session, maybe 6 to 7 hours, and the remaining 8 to 6 hours, I will spread them out in another two sessions. If I can play more, i definitely will. I really hope so.

My eyes are closing and it's 2352 now, I wanna watch some Black Clover before I sleep

Let's start crushing souls tomorrow!

[Day Fifteen] 05/12/2018

BANKROLL : 1830$
(actual : 1650$)***
Hours : 3hours 10min~
7:10~pm to 10:20~pm
Up : 440$
Game : 1/2
Buy in : 200$

☺

Yesterday was a good session. The field is soft af. All the regs are terrible in their own ways even though they know and understand poker concepts. And the fishes are free and easy spewing money. I as usual am playing tight.

It might seem like that I'm nitty but I actual fact I'm just playing according to my ranges and if I miss, i tuck my hands under my thighs.

And when i get into pots, I try to find reasons to continue being aggressive ^^ uh~ hehe

Theres a good looking fish who turned ugly and became tilted when I stacked him twice. Lol

Hero : EP opened to 12$~ with KKp(no clubs~)


button flats 12$


BB 3bets to 70$~


Hero 4bets to 120$~


V tank called


FLOP : Qh6d2c(I think so)


Action when check check


Turn : Xc(I think so)

V put hero all in immediately when the TURN card fell and hero quickly made the call

It was an easy call, and I'm going to call regardless of what cards fall except for the 3 outer A and 2 outer Q

V shows AcTc and river bricked. Hero scooped up a big one

That put the fish on tilt and it's not helpful to have regs talking **** to hero and openly discussing about hero's strategy after that hand because that put the fish on even worse tilt. Not smart man. Not cool either. But om the way up, you will meet all kinds of folks who are contented, and they will throw stones at those who are climbing upwards just because they think they are already on the peak. Bring great at the game is awesome, I am glad for you but being mean is really
.. speechless. All i can do is just smile. I think that might be why the particular card room isn't as popular as other card rooms further down in town. It's because regs who frequent this card room talks **** a lot and make fishes feel uncomfortable and reminds them of the terrible experiences they felt when losing at this card room and that's why games become harder to run. But it's none of my business since the floor manager doesn't seem to be bothered by it. I mean, there are other casinos I can visit, just that they are miles away from where i live, but oh well.

Today while I was bathing, i sat on the stool and realised that I actually can beat the deepstacked regs. It's my playing scared money issues due to my small bankroll which led me to not buy in as deep as them. Especially since the typical raise size is almost 3x to 4x that of a 2/5 game and if I were to buyin for 200$ and miss the flop completely a couple of times i will be in terrible shape. I don't do topping off and i also don't bring another bullet to reload if I lose my stack. If I were to buy in as deep as them to 500$, raising to 20$ would be about 4% of my starting stack and if I miss a couple of times I'm still sitting on a healthy stack. I'll probably run my bankroll up to 3k and take a 500$ shot by buying in for 500$ maybe at another casino or something.

Don't you run cos I'm going to come and stack you.

[Day Twenty] 10/12/2018

BANKROLL : 1840$
(actual : 1500$)***
Hours : 2 hours
8~pm to 10~pm
Up : 10$
Game : 1/1
Buy in : 200$

***Cashed out 160$~ for expenses

---

1104 the chips they use are 5$ and 1$. Damn, when someone raises, the chips are all of the same colour and if there's 100$ of dollars in the pot and you need to count it visually, you go blind buddy.


0949
Played very badly this session i called with QTo to a 5bet.

Waited for almost 2 hours before the players strolled into the card room. I went to a new place. It's a private game but feels more like a gambling den because there are other games running too and the people there looks shady.

There's this guy who sat on my direct left. The way he walks, i have a feeling his middle name might be "Trouble". Fair skinned, big round stomach, standing at about 165cm Asian male. Wearing black plastic framed spectacleswith black pouch slinging from left to right in blue tee shirt and black three quarter pants with the logo spelling 'Aididui!'(just kidding about the logo).

He came with a friend and was seated one seat away on my left initially and when they game began, he changed seats with his friend, so, he's on my direct left now.
Definitely a reg there from the way he walks around the place

I wasn't able to focus, might be fatigue after my anxiety bout before heading to this card room.
It's my first time there

7 handed to begin with

Second orbit,
EP limps 1$
Hero raised to 10 with QQ pre in CO
V calls 10$ OTB
Limper calls 9$

3 way to the flop

Pot : 31$~

Flop : 6d8hTh

Limper checks
Hero cbets to 20$
OTB raised to 60$~

Hero blank blank can't think. Brain auto defaulted to be receptive of anything the environment throws at hero.

Someone on seat 8 commented to seat 9, Mr. Boa
Seat 8 said, "that raise size is enough to take a cab ride home." Thanks for your comments, Sir. I'll keep that goddamnmmoneyinmypocket.

Facing a raise OTF with QQp. I went into the tank for a while and folded. Brain kept saying, "there's lots of 2PAIR"

OTB shows JJp. Makes sense.

Something to note of is hero haven't got 3betted much since I started playing poker again(since the beginning of this challenge) and all my studies is based on myself 3betting others because I haven't encountered this situation yet after a few sessions.

There's a few more hands hero got raised by this V and then that QTo hand which hero called a 5bet

(One more hand history before the QTo hand)
Hero raised OTB(160$~) with SC, got 3betted by Direct left(call him Fishermen. FM for short) hero folds

(QTo hand)
Again folds to hero OTB, still, in the first session, hero raised to 10$ with QTo
V 3bets to 60$~
Hero 4bets to 100$
V puts hero all in, hero calls off 50$

FM shows AQo

He's a nice guy, he asked hero how many times? I replied, "three". He replies, "three?!" But still agreed to it.

First flop : Q high
Second flop : T high
Third flop : Club flush (hero have Tc)

So, hero won the second and third flop.
FM is a little tilted but who cares.

The rest of the session hero just focused on playing tight but definitely still unable to focus

Then there's this hand, hero had 99p in UTG. It's a 8 handed now and it's the beginning of the second hour

Hero raised from UTG with 99p to 8$
Dealer announced 10$ to call, hero corrected him
4 callers

Pot : 33$
Flop : AXX FD

checks through

TURN : 5x double FD(diamonds and hearts, not that the suit matters)

Checks through

River : X low card

Hero checks without much thought although hero had initially wanted to bet for value.

Someone calls A high hero shows 99p, scoops up the pot.

Mr Boa was observing and thinking about hero's play style from what I saw at the corner of my eyes but he made no comments about it.

Hero was up to about 230$ now.

The table became a 3betting fest.

The 3bets are not the normal sized ones. They usually 3bet to 50$, 60$. There's no much room for maneuvre.
It's either you call and shove OTF with TP+ or you fold. No one's going to fold to you. But the thing is, there's no showdown. Everyone's 3bet squeezing and taking down pots preflop now that the 3bet fest has began. I'm not into that game, I prefer a lower variance game. The players there are unpredictable

I wasn't playing my A game. Initially I planned to play from 7 to 11 but the games started late and I wasn't able to concentrate so i left earlier than planned

Going to meet my friend later for lunch and shall see what he thinks about the game and hero's plays and what can be improved and adjusted1051

[Day Twenty Three] 13/12/2018

Unrealistic expectations and having others outs in life

1224 At the beginning of this challenge, I expected myself to be able to play long hours and be able to show up every time like how i used to be able to do in the past(2015) and that has caused some anxiety, especially some i have only put in 18 hours of play time since the beginning of this challenge

I think that that way of thinking needs to be corrected.
2015 is 2015 and 2018 is 2018 time have changed and so have my physical and mental self as well as the expectations of the people around me and in the society

Although I really want to put in that 80+hours or more every month but that probably isnt possible for now


That's when my friend's words struck me.

"You can do something else when you are not playing poker"

"You shouldn't force yourself to play when you can't. Stsrt with maybe 50 hours a month then 70, 90, increase a little bit every month"

I might probably only be able to to get 30 hours of play by Day Thirty, realistic expectation. But its ok. I can increase it gradually. As long as my bankroll is growing and i am putting in hours i can make it. It's a marathon it only ends when my life ends. Walk there or crawl there, just dont stop, you will get there and in the mean time enjoy the process.. so, a realistic expectation is thay im going to put in 30 hours this month and i accept it.

As well, I can do other **** in life too. I have stayed up in night to morning 3am+ for a period of time studying forex. And although the ****ty laptop is spoilt for months, i can get it fixed. Im going to fix it myself. The parts are custom made but it's cheap and although it will take at least 2 weeks to arrive to me, i have already waited for a few years, an extra two weeks is nothing. Besides forex, i csn do dropshipping, study the materials again and keep moving forward slowly

As for how my everyday goes.

My entire time awake is about poker. Am i going today? Should i go today? What if i go today and **** happens? How am i going to counter that aggressive fella on my direct left? Is the field going go be soft enough today so that i can book a win? What if i drop(lose a bullet or two or just lose that particular session in general)?

Too much thoughts is too much. Just play. Just play to your best. You win some and lose some. You used to drop two bullets a night(which is almost half a month salary your mother brings home) and laugh your way to McDonald's with your friend in the middle of the night, then playing heads-up in Pokerstars play money app on the phone while waiting the first morning train service at 5:30am to go home and at the end of the month you show up with good results. Sometimes you make questionable moves and stupid folds when the odds are too good to fold like that bottom 2pair hand where V check raised you and you flatted it and folded the TURN when the club hits when given a 4:1 odds to call an all in. You did all those ****. And you still managed to grind up a positive result every month

Just go. Just go and try to lose the money, you probably won't be able to even if you try. Your job now to lose that 1.5k. lose it. You very probably won't be able to

...1251 help me to help you. I need to get it done.

[Day Twenty Five] 15/12/2018

BANKROLL : 1800$
(actual : 1450$)***
Hours : 4.5hours
5:30~pm to 10:20~pm
Down : 40$
Game : 1/1
Buy in : 200$

My Bankroll Lose it All Challenge!

Mr. Boa isn't here today I enjoyed some peace of mind and ears from his bull.

Saw some new faces today at the table

RidingHood (RH)
JC SUM (JC)
Eric Thomas (ET)
Glenorson (Glen)
FM fat friend(Fat)**

**FM didn't come today

And some others who I didn't have any history with and didn't manage to play much with them.

JC and his friends left about an hour later after i sat down. They are aggressive players and definitely thinking people. Their posture and voice tonality certainly is intimidating too. Especially JC who spotted gold ring and expensive watch. He taunted the skinny nerdy dealer about miscalculation of his rake. The dealer didnt cslculate it wrongly after some calculations again

I only managed to lose 40$ today and the host wanted me to lose thr Lose It All Challenge so much that he gave me a rebate of 20$ why?!

I spent that 20$ on food and transport.

I played poorly today in a particular hand.

Glen open raised in EP to 10$. Hero(230$) 3bets OTB with QcQs to 30$, Glen calls

Heads-up

Pot 32$

Flop : Kh2h2c

Check check

TURN : 8c

Glen betted 40$

Hero folded

I thought that he will be betting with some KX combos here like, AK,KQ,KJs and also AXcc/hh type hands

We are still a favourite to win but in the heat of the battle, I folded.

The thought of having to call off 40$ which I could use to buy food or for transport, I just have to fold it.

After that hand, my direct left(busybody aka BS) signaled to Glen to head out for a smoke. I think he saw my hole cards when I was peeling them preflop, that was why when he reached out for chips but decided to fold instead. And when i folded QQp(which is still good against all other FD and smallper premium pocket pairs and mid pocket pairs), his need to let Glen know what i just did betrayed him. Glen asked him, "why? Why the sudden urge to smoke?"

Eventually was down to 160$ but the host do not have enough change and decided to give me a 20$ rebate. Thank you ET, good host 12/10

0018

The last hand before i cashed out, I thought to myself "let's cut short our losses" i folded KcJc UTG in 10 handed table after RH open raised to 15$~ on my right 1 seats away

Can't Stand(CS) calls 1 seat away on my left and two other calls

Flop : KdJd3x(d.FD)

I almost vomitted blood

CS betted FLOP and TURN aggressively and I cant remember if there was a RIVER, but either way, he held K3s and was smiling brightly as he showed BS(on my direct right) his hole cards by flashing it before it hit the muck

But well, I lose small and wait for fishes i could stack off of. But of course, it's not that these players wouldn't pay me off when i hit a hand but that i was somewhat card dead. I was also starting to get bored. Plus the squeeziness, I was forced to sit in an awesome manner.

Hope that the money i threw into the sea will help boost my fishy image.

Also to note is that I didn't feel anxious today. Maybe when I OR but that is normal to me, that blood gushing feeling, but the I'm so anxious it's paralysing feeling, I didn't feel it today 0036~

[Day Twenty Six] 16/12/2018

0108

I forgot to add. I was observing RH because he was directly beside my right for a couple of hours and i realised that he was opem raising smallish to 6$ with many garbage especially in LP. Something I'm pretty proud of myself about because my observation skills is getting better. But yeah, I didn't exploit that leak. I'm all for low variance poker for now. Invest my money at where it can earn us the most money with the "lowest risks".

Very glad to hear that you’ve not been feeling anxious for the past session and have been consistently pushing yourself to greater heights! Keep up the good work!

Hey Yamori! Thank you !

[Day Thirty] 20/12/2018

BANKROLL : 1900$
(actual : 1550$)
Hours : 5.5 hours
4:20~pm to 9:50~pm
Up : 100$
Game : 1/2
Buy in : 200$

Back to office!

Today was happening. I was back to the same cardroom i frequented the most. And a fight between Mr. Boa and the new dealer almost broke out. I feel for the dealer. He have great grit when Mr. Boa was hurling vulgarities at him and even complained to the floor manager using "underhanded" means. I had colleagues and people making complains about me behind my back just because they don't like me and so I understand how the dealer felt.

I haven't see the dealer before, hes alittle blur and made quite a few mistakes such as letting the bottom of the deck peek out several times, and miscounting the pot when asked for the pot size as well as blocking the vision of Mr. Boa from seeing the board cards because the dealers and was in the way. But to shout at the dealer and asking him to fight you is not cool. The dealer kept his calm though. *Thumbs up*

Today i was running pretty ok in the first couple of hours and then I started being card dead at about 8pm+ 9pm

There was one particular hand which I believe I gotten "off the table" value even though i folded it. I knew what I was doing, and i made that fold. Lower variance.

It was 8 handed, folded to me OTB. I held AJo and opened to 10$ with 290$~ behind.

RidingHood was sitted on my direct left. He 3betted to 45$.

I thought for a little and commented, "too small isnt it?" Referring to my open raise size which the table sually opens to 15$, me included in this particular cardroom

I folded. He said, "yes definitely" and shown his hole cards. 10$ lesson fee

It seems like the regs are out to "exploit" me by leaving the seat empty for me while all of them are on my left lol.

Well, there isn't much to exploit besides getting to see me open and folding their cards preflop. I'm glad, too. Since I have the fishes on my left

In the first hour, I was having anxiety attack and i messaged my partner and was told to inhale and exhale ^^ My hands was shivering and then this hand came.

Hero was in LP. 7/8 handed. EP raised, two callers and my direct right 3betted. I heard the dealer announcing 60$ to call. I shoved it in for 200$~. V tank folded

Two mistakes, maybe.

1st - Did the dealer announced 16$ to call or 60$?

2nd - Why didn't i minraise, GII OTF instead?

Lessons, lessons.

After dinner at about 9+ I started feeling tired and i recognised that situation, i knew I wasnt going to be able to focus any longer. Plus i was carddead, I decided that the best move i could make at then was to cash out(for a win). Initially i wanted to play until 11pm before I call it a day but let's not get greedy. Plus one of the fish whom i stacked off twice in a previous session was there too and he has been goading me for not playing any hands at all. He's 3 seats away from me towards my left. Wow seated so far away, are you afraid of me? How then can you exploit me if you keep folding when i OR? Sad face.

Cashed out ching ching 100$

Cash games is a marathon. I'm glad that I managed to increase my play time. Lol play time. I'm on a play date LOL

[Day Thirty Four] 24/12/2018

BANKROLL : 1850$
(actual : 1500$)
Hours : 3 hours
6:30~pm to 9:30~pm
Down : 50$
Game : 1/2
Buy in : 200$

Pocket Queens hits the straight wall. V short stack of 85$ open raised to 85$ and it folded to me which i called. V shows JTo and the flop comes 789. Lol. Next.

Made a loose call today with a limped hand for 3 streets i think, 1st - partly because I didn't register the fact that my TWO PAIR is no good,

2nd - and that it's a limped pot, so, it's natural that V will have all kinds of 8X combos.

3rd - And thirdly, since my Two pair is no good, so if V have AQ(which I thought V might be barreling with), my Q2o actually is the inferior-est of all Queens out there

A combination of inaccurate thinking and misunderstanding of V and hero's range and actions.

V betted 50$ into 60$ pot OTR and hero tank called thinking V might be betting with AQ although the likelihood that V has 8X here is greater than AQ or any other QX combos.

But something to take note of is that hero have take away lessons about V. Let's call him..Have To Call(HTC), since he keep saying he have to call, and he really does call no matter the amount

HTC is a calling station and will call any "reasonable" amount. When HTC bets big even OTF, he very likely have something on the FLOP. HTC bluffs infrequently. HTC bought in for 1k and within a matter of 3 hours, his stack dwindled down to 300$~

Besides HTC, hero have made further observations of other regs.

Boa - Folds the button in 6 max games and can folx when hero OR. Notices that hero is "exploiting" hero's tight image by OR to "steal the blinds". Btw Boa gave me a tip. Once or twice i forgotten. He says that I played well I think, thanks

Skinny man(SM) - Player seen at a 1/1 private game i went to i think. Cbets 25 into a 30$ pot. 3 way which he opened preflop. Flop : Th9hXx(S/FD). Slit raised to 75$ and SM fold.

Slit - Slit can't fold. Can't fold. Mostly. He calls for the pot odds you bet he calls hes going to deny all the equity. That's what I feel hes doing but it doesn't matter what he is doing. All that matters is that he can't fold. He OR with all kinds of SC and calls with those too.

0356 I made some changes to my game. I stole the blind once with SC lol felt so exciting haha because I don't expect them to fold. Especially when I'm in LP and boa is in the blinds.

I met my friend two days ago i think for supper near my place and we was having some discussion about how i played. Something hinged on my "head muscles" and it kind of clicked today when i was playing and observing how slit play by raising SM's cbet and as well, how HTC plays

What i concluded is, if we have a hand we have already assigned to 3bet with preflop or OR, we do it. Just do it. Reason is we can see how V reacts to our bets. And if V does call or raise, we have another set of actions which we have already pre assigned to use. Such as 3betting with SC as a squeeze play or OR with AXs to steal the blinds etc especially against unknowns.
This is one of the reasons I used to justify calling off that 50$ river bet by HTC. It was kind of worth it. I feel. Hope HTC continues to come back to play more poker. And of course, once we have gathered enough information, we can think start to adjust ourselves and our ranges etc.

0408

[Day Thirty Eight] 28/12/2018

BANKROLL : 1650$
(actual : 1300$)
Hours : 1 hours
4pm to 5~pm
Down : 200$
Game : 1/2
Buy in : 200$

Downed 200$ in the first hour.

9 handed

Held AcQs in the blinds I think. V raised and I 3betted to 35$, V tanked and called me because it was me.

V has some history with hero because hero stacked him twice before in the same session. And he has been wary of hero ever since hero OR, or 3bets.

Pot : 73$~

Flop : 2cAhXc

Hero cbet 40$ V raised to 140$~+ and is all in
Hero calls 100$ quickly

V shows 3c5c gutshot flush draw

We have the nut redraw, and TURN comes another club and river is Xd

Hero's stack is about 22$ now.

After a couple of hands, V OOP raised to 12$, hero 3bets to 22$~ and is all in with 44

V tank and calls

V shows KQo

Flop : KQXXX

V hits two pair and hero left after a minute.

Today I wasn't in my best form but I went nonetheless because I know i can move

Feeling stressed af plus the lack of sleep and anxiety attacks. 2139

[Day Forty One] 01/12/2019

0052 bought a new SD card to transfer all my pics, videos, files, ebooks, notes etc so that i can download poker bankroll app.

Here's the results for the 40 day poker challenge.

40 Day Poker Challenge Results



Busto for a buyin the last session and am a little scared because I wanna avoid a downswing or a consecutive loss of another buyin that's why I didn't play

I studied on aggression and the correct ways to apply them through different methods and stuff like that and will be applying them at the next session i go to which is on the 2nd Jan 2019

I still do feel tired in the afternoons and blank out and have some slight anxiety, still which I am able to contain because I recognise it and am able to ease it several times even though I know im not going to play. I just sit on the chair of something and I imagine myself going to play and feeling the tiredness, the heaviness of my eye lids, the fogginess I am experiencing in my brain and then i imagine myself stepping out of the house to go to play despite all that. Actually the hardest part is stepping out of the house. But as I kidnap myself by booking a slot, i have no choice but to go because i do not want to spoil other people's games and also i wanna keep my promises

I will be using a progressive method on increasing my playing hours on a weekly basis because monthly basis is too long and everyone will put it off because "there's still 20 days before the end of the month!"

How it works would be, I'm starting with 10 hours for the first week of 2019 and then I will increase an hour every week. In such a way, by the end of January 2019, I would have completed 50 hours on the felt

Eventually I hope to be able to do at least 80 hours a month and have other income sources which I will explore further as I play poker more frequently and consistently

The graph.



Looks like a minor correction before heading towards the upside. Hopefully there will not be any long ranging period before the breakout towards the upside.

Ah ps sorry wrong game (lol)

[Day Forty Six] 05/01/2019

BANKROLL : 840$+130$
Hours : 3.2 hours
8pm to 11:20~pm
Up : 130$
Game : 1/2
Buy in : 200$

Finally get to play poker again. For the past few days I have been trying to book home games but one blocked me on Whatsapp(I think) and the other one replied too late and I have spent all my energy than the day thinking why they haven't comfirmed my seat, by evenings spent all of my energy on feeling anxious and stopped seeing ws and that's when they finally replied, which I only saw 4 hours later.

Back to the place i frequent the most. Don't think i am able to complete 10 hours by this week.

I face a difficult spot and made a mistake in a multiway spot, I feel.

3 limpers including Mr. Estate in HJ/CO, unknown button(V).

SB raised to 12$

Hero in BB calls 10$

Limpers all call.

Pot : 60$

Flop : 4c5c6h

SB checks

Hero decided to bet for 40$ with 55p

All folds to butt who makes the call

SB folds

Pot : 140$

Turn : As

Hero checks. 200$ behind OTT

V immediately pulls out entire stack of 25$ chips without hesitation, totalling 270$. He didn't even ask for chip stack count from hero.

Faced with such aggression on a coordinated board, i reluctantly folded.

After that hand, I felt disgusted. Could i have made that fold? Should i have made that fold? V is unknown to hero and it was just the first quarter of the second hour. Hero have been pretty active on the table opening looser than before with playable hands such as KQo in LMP and cbetting more than usual because I know i can get folds. And V is unknown to hero, so, there's no way he could have known that hero's usual range is strong. But since we called in the bb..

After that hand, I thought about it and realised that V could be betting with TWO PAIRS, SETS, FD+GS, STRAIGHT DRAWS etc which hero beats.

There's definitely the possibility of V holding a made straight, A2s, 78s but the probability is definitely lower if we consider V's entire range. But why would V want to chase hero out of the pot by overbetting?

The TURN bet sizing is weird. It's 1/2.. And V is pretty tight at the table as observed..

Should have checked to see others response first..

Some errors.

The flop is 3c4c5h

[Day Forty Eight] 07/01/2019

BANKROLL : 970$+90$-20$
Hours : 1.3 hours
6:50pm to 8:22~pm
Up : 90$
Game : 5/5
Buy in : 500$
Expenses : 20$ + -

I played 5/5?! I got a one off stake for 50% of my entire piece from a home game host i frequent.

His game isn't running on that day so he suggested that i play 5/5 and sell him 50% of my game with no makeup.

I consulted my friend and then took it.

It felt great open raising to 30$ after limpers lol.

I only played for about 1 hour 30 mins because i was late and i told the host i will be leaving at 8pm but I overstayed because I wanted to sit out at UTG.

I think the only hands i played was AK, KK, AA i think.

Dipping toes. Total won is 180$ and i took my piece of 50% so it's 90$.

[Day Fort Nine] 08/01/2019

BANKROLL : 1040$ - 30$ - 20$
Hours : 3 hours 12 mins~
6pm to 9:12~pm
Down : 30$
Game : 1/2
Buy in : 200$
Expenses(?) : 20$

Today was a slow day. But first hour i had JJp i open raised in a 8 handed table.

V young asian male on tilt since yesterday's game at 5/5 continues his tilt, splashing thousands of dollars away.
Let's call him the killer.

And X Man 3 seats away.

Both calls

Pot : 48$~

FLOP : Jd4hXd

I cbet to 25$ I think and both V folded.

Probably just check raise instead. I actually took note of the killer's tendencies now that hes on tilt and he likes to raise a ton. I misplayed by cbetting automatically zz

Then i was card dead and everyoe's like, "this guy's a piece of rock." But when i open raised, they still call to crack lol thanks i like that attitude.

Keep it up!

Boa likes to make unnecessary comments lol. I feel that he's delusional lol. He said, "i forgot to tell the host to inform you that the min buyin is 500$" lol like what? Someone wanted a piece of my game, Sir~ if not i wouldn't have went to play 5/5 with my bankroll.

It's good to be a "good" player, but not s big mouthed one because not many ppl like you, Professional.Poker.Player~~~

[Day Fifty] 09/01/2019

BANKROLL : 990 + 570 - 30
Hours : 4 hours 28 mins~
5:12~pm to 9:40~pm
Up : 570$
Game : 5/5
Buy in : 500$
Expenses : 30$
Staked : SYT (50% buyin)

Had another one off stake with SYT but I'm expecting more to come

The line up today is very good and I am running good too.

I got bluffed by a fish who's pretty new to the game. I played with him before and he was the guy with the T8 hand on a board of Q882X which he triple barreled while i held Q2

Similar board here, I held AKo.

Hero(effective) : 720$~

Limpers then i raised in LP to 30$(too little as i think about it after the hand).

All limpers call. 6 way to the FLOP

Pot : 180$~

FLOP : A55r

all checks to V on my direct right who fired 150
Hero calls 150$

Pot : 480$~

TURN : 6x

V fires again for 250

Hero tankkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk-ed. Shown V a card, dealer calls clock, 2 minutes to go. I folded reluctantly at 20th second.

1st - The last session I played, I have not seen V bluffing when i was paying attention

2nd - V value bets relentlessly when he have it

3rd - it's a 6 way pot so I thought if I won it 1 in 6 times I'm good(not sure if it still applies after I called the FLOP bet)

V shows 97o after a reg asked V to show

And then in future hands V have been seen bluffing quite a bit

I realised one of my leaks is in the way i think about the chips but I my bankroll is small and this is my liferoll so I can't help it but to play scared at times even though I could have employed a better strategy and mindset, and leave the rest to whatever comes

The Killer comes to the game at the third hour and he's on my direct left again. As usual he's splashing money around but not as crazy this time

Since he have position on us it can get a little tricky because he seems to have something against me, not sure. Maybe because i play "too tight" the previous session(actually am card dead)

So, he just keeps coming into pots that im in and probably feels that I'm playing scared. So, he kep betting or raising when checked to

So, in the last orbit i had black Kings preflop

Someone in EP raised and i 3betted to 60$ I think
Killer calls 60 IP and EP open raiser calls

Pot : 190$~

Flop : 468 two diamonds

I cbetted and Killer calls

Pot : 400+(after I asked the dealer)

Turn : 4x

I betted again and Killer shoves for additional 380 + -

I'm like, not again.. V definitely have 4X in their range so, I could be beat here but V is a maniac and called a 4bet all in with A2o(on tilt) and seems to have some grudges with me so I called to gamble here

V shows 69o lol

I asked if V wanted to run it twice but was declined, so there we go

I scooped up the massive pot lol my biggest win so far in NLHE.

Pot size : 1150$

I tipped X Man for giving me a fist bump and the dealer for being nice when i needed time or when I blanked out

Took my 50% of 570$ hehe 1137

[Day Fifty Three] 12/01/2019

BANKROLL : 1530 - 10
Hours : 2 hours 50 mins~
7:10~pm to 10~pm
Down : 10$
Game : 5/5
Buy in : 500$
Expenses : -
Staked : SYT (50% buyin)

Was down 30$, took a 10$ rebate and shared the loss with my staker. 10$ each.

Stacked a easy fish in the first hour with KQo.
And then got into tricky spots with a regular which I know could get tricky.

First hand i got into with him.

Let's label him as Ann.

Hero : KK

Ann raised in EP to 15$ and got a caller two seats away from him

one folded to hero.

Hero 3betted to 70$ in the bb

Folds back to Ann, Ann made the call of 55$

and caller 2 seats away(XMan) folded

Pot : 165$~

Flop : AcAsJs

Hero check, Ann checks back

Pot : 165$~

Turn : low non spade

Hero checks V bets 100$ hero calls quickly

River : X non spade

Hero check with intention of calling again

V jams for 884$

Effective stack is on hero with 730$ behind

Hero tank folded

After the hand, Ann's reg friend asked him what he had and he said, "Quads".

Two orbits later, the discussion came up again and Annsaid that he have 77p. When his friend asked him why he said he have Quads, he said, "that was to disturb -me-"

I have some playable hands preflop, raised them up and didn't manage to hit the flop, some i cbetted with and got raised and folded with. Some i check folded because its multiway.

Then this hand occurred.

Two limpers and then hero OR to 40$. Got a caller 3 seats away. And Ann called too, in the LP.
Limpers folded. I think

Three way flop

Pot : 140$~

Flop : 457r

Action on hero, hero bets 60$

Preflop caller called and Ann raised to 260$

Hero folded

V tanked and showed his gutshot then after some chatter between V and Ann, V folded.

I'm having mixed feelings about that cbet now. Probably could have been a check call situation.

Something to note, I remembered the pot to be 120$~ and that i cbetted half pot but not sure how it became 140$ became now that i am typing it out because 120$ doesn't make sense

---

1430 I think if i do not do something about Ann, hes going to run me over. But it could be that he have a hand this session and am just doing his standard raises and trying out moves while we do not have much of a playable hand because last session, he was sitting on our right, a few seats away though but never pulled off "tricks" except for one where we raised preflop and he 3betted

I will be taking notes of all his action to my best ability for the next few sessions and study them. 1435

[Day Fifty Four] 13/01/2019

BANKROLL : 1270
Hours : 2 hours 50 mins~
7:10~pm to 10~pm
Down : 250$
Game : 5/5
Buy in : 500$
Expenses : -
Staked : SYT (50% buyin)

What a donkey you are.

I kept making moves by overbet shoving OTF and have some folded to me as my stack dwindled to 270+

Might be due to boredom, or missing flops all the time or whatever reason I can't think of now, or you can call them excuses. Whatever.

I seldom tilt, but i autopilot alot.

Today I was recording hands of my chosen target in the previous post and not sure why he decided to leave earlier today for a win. Maybe he caught what i was doing

So, kept missing flops, no more chosen target. Kept getting raised etc

I was left with 270+ V opened in EP to 15 and i called in position.

4 way flop i think.

Flop : KKX

V betted and i raised all in overbet shoving

V tank folded

Another time.

V limps

I was in the hand, can't remember why have to check my chat with my friend.

I was planning to leave already in the next orbit.

It's a 4 way flop.

I'm OTB

Pot : 20$

Flop : 883

V checks to me I bet 20$. Mouth was dry. Wanted to announce a raise to 12$ but words got stuck and i decided quickly to make it 20$ instead.

20$ flew into the pot.

V check raised OOP to 55$

I have 300$ left i think

I autopilotted Jam it in.

I have 99p.

V tanked and questioned himself and thought to himself about my range aloud and said, could i be holding QQp here?

"I'll call here so I can know how you play the next time."

It sounds familiar. The last time I heard it was from a reg lag 40+ Asian man. And days later, my bankroll went busto and I was out of the game for years.

Then made the call, hitting the chips onto the table hard.

I shown hand and V says he's good.

No insurance, thank you.

Turn and river bricked

V shows 8d9d

I show 99p

2335